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Siferiax

Kibcy follow in Wolf's paw prints

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*dances all over this thread* I has an internet!

Wow, Kibcy, I'm amazed that I hadn't seen your pain through your kindness all this time. You have a beautiful soul, albeit scarred, but you still smile through all of the pain. Lose this guy, Kibcy, he's not worth your kindness nor your smiles. Hold fast to your truths, because when you're out there in the world, it's the only one you have. We'll always be on your side, for you have always been on ours, if you ever need a friend, one will not be too far behind.

 

You're not the first to note that *big hug* It's okay.

Thank you!!! And the guy's been lost for nearly 2 years, but it still haunts me and hurts me...

Awww ;3; thank you so much for your kind words.

 

Big hug sent your way.It has been a tough week, with having to have x-rays at the hospital. And at least for me, those kind of stressors bring all my insecurities out in full fighting force. If what you need to do to relax is play Assassins Creed, go for it! I

 

You show a lot of maturity in your dealing with the guy now. You realize he is bad news and is a manipulator, but at the same time you aren't full of hate for him. And you showed incredible strength in getting out of that situation. You have more strength than you realize.

 

As for the manager and asking for a different job, would it help to write out what you want to say first? Maybe even practice in front of a mirror. Then when you have an opportunity for your 20 seconds of beserker courage you'll be ready. I so get where you are coming from on this. I think introverts (myself in this category) tend to way overthink things. I can totally get myself spinning with re-thinking conversations in my head and trying to figure out if I said them correctly. I'm working at just letting it go, saying it to the best of my abilities and then not letting myself dwell on it.

 

Take a nice relaxing evening, doing whatever soothes and give you comfort

 

Yeah, mostly the blood taking that started off the week has made everything more stressful than it would've been otherwise. I'll be glad when it's weekend and I can take some time off. And this all was probably triggered by that also.

And I totally played Assassin's Creed :D

Thank you for saying that, but the truth is, I am full of hate for the guy, however I don't let it blind me from the truth about what happened and what the reasons were and etc. It would be easy to go and tell all these lies about him, but I always try to be fair, despite how I might feel. (that probably requires even more strength, haha)

Getting out of that situation was insanely difficult. I had "left" him before when he was still just my friend, broke off contact. But I bounced back and started talking with him again.

The breaking point was the realization I didn't want my family to know who I was dating, that I was dating at all. (besides my parents who already knew) That sorta opens your eyes I guess :)

What I put in bold is just so full of truth!

I always face palm later and be like "what?! I shouldn't have said that", or "damn I should've made that remark".

But like you said, dwelling on it isn't useful.

Not sure if it would be helpful (I didn't do it), they say it is, but on the other hand I will obsess over it and feel bad when I didn't say exactly what I wrote down/practiced. It also makes it difficult to react when someone doesn't follow your "script". So I'm a little on the fence for what would be the best strategy.

Knowing what you want from the conversation is probably good though :)

 

(>¿¿)>

 

<3 <(^^<)

 

That is so wonderful Kib! I'm so happy you could be honest and understood by your manager. This is really great. :)

 

And there aren't big enough hugs I can send your way. I'm so sorry such a horrible person bumped into and shattered your life but as Elastigirl said, you have dealt with him in such a mature way it is awe-inspiring. You are an amazing person Kib, so strong and beautiful inside out.

Yeah I'm really happy about it too :D

Thank you so much!!!

Yeah, I try to look on the bright side... we wrote on stories nearly every day and now I have quite the database of characters to work with in my own stories haha!

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So yesterday I didn't workout because I was full of pain (physical) and playing Assassin's Creed.

The inside of my upper left leg has been feeling painful and sore for a few days now and my legs are just sore overall or something.

Then my shoulder was in an awful amount of pain... because... BRA... yes because I was wearing a bra. And I was wearing one the day before as well. I will shoot anyone who says "bras are better for you". It has been said to me often enough and I just... they hurt me!

I wear cotton tops normally... since high school... they don't cause me pain.

And that was Kibcy's too much information moment...........

Anyway it was a walking day, but I needed a not-walking-day.

Today I'll be walking about 3km anyway to request a new passport so it's all good.

My shoulder still is sore/hurts though :(

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Stupid bras! :P I used to wear these kind of 'sport tops' for ages (until about 2 years ago actually) instead of bras, way comfier. But lately I have been wearing bras, they usually don't hurt but the labels can be SOOOO itchy :( Ugh, stupid things.

 

Good luck with the walking, I hope you'll manage to avoid the rain :)

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Stupid bras! :tongue: I used to wear these kind of 'sport tops' for ages (until about 2 years ago actually) instead of bras, way comfier. But lately I have been wearing bras, they usually don't hurt but the labels can be SOOOO itchy :( Ugh, stupid things.

 

Good luck with the walking, I hope you'll manage to avoid the rain :)

Haha yeah! I can imagine they'd be comfier :)

I just need to find something that works for me ;)

Yeah, I doubt that :tongue: Thanks!

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I hope you're having a better day today. :) That's great that you got to enjoy some Assassin's Creed. It's always nice to escape to another world when this one is causing you grief. 

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I hope you're having a better day today. :) That's great that you got to enjoy some Assassin's Creed. It's always nice to escape to another world when this one is causing you grief.

If I wasn't so tired I probably would be having a better day... Also I'm still stressed.

Yeah that's totally why I love games, they're so immersive!

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*dances all over this thread* I has an internet!

I laughed and smiled at this. Considering how my mood has been lately, that is saying a lot!

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I laughed and smiled at this. Considering how my mood has been lately, that is saying a lot!

*big hug* I'm really glad I could get you to laugh :) and I know how much that is saying!!! <333

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Tired. *shakes fist at Assassin's Creed* Stop being addicting!

Yesterday was... interesting...

I ended up having to go to the police station. I've never been to one before.

The guy there was nice to me. :)

Oh eh I was there to report my ID card missing. The damn thing expired in 2010 and I can't phantom what even happened to it.

Then I paid all the money at city hall to get a new passport and a new driver's license, and also a fine for losing my ID card. LOVELY.

Then I went home for AC.

Also I have a new reaction to junk food!! "Meh".

I don't even know how that happened!!

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I'm having a lust for food. A non-specific lust.

It was going so great... I shouldn't even be surprised.

So I wouldn't say I'm craving anything... but I think my body is missing some protein.

I've quit the egg eating habit again :| why? Because of stress week.

I just play AC, ignore my reminders, so don't boil eggs, so don't have eggs to eat in the morning.

I took my breakfast to work 1 time... then... not anymore.

IT'S GOING GREAT HABITS, you rock XD

It's a time constraint mostly. Well no. A stress constraint that makes me not have time.

I disagree with "not having time" being a lie, fyi

There are days where you really just DO NOT HAVE TIME.

There are also days where stress makes you do the wrong things. Well the right things at that time, but not those that are a priority.

There are only 24 hours in a day. Not enough time to unwind from the build up of stress from the past week. 2 hours of AC just doesn't cut it. But it's the only thing I can do to unwind after just running around stressing out.

So workouts and good food habits just kinda... don't work.

I'll recover over the weekend and all will be better :3

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Also... what was I doing this challenge again.

That moment when Kibcy stops using her template and totally loses track of everything.

AT LEAST I CAN'T FEEL LIKE A FAILURE THAT WAY XD

I'm working on being a better me guys. Screw challenge goals!

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Also... what was I doing this challenge again.

That moment when Kibcy stops using her template and totally loses track of everything.

AT LEAST I CAN'T FEEL LIKE A FAILURE THAT WAY XD

I'm working on being a better me guys. Screw challenge goals!

A better you is more important than any challenge goals anyway. <3 you now.  <3 the better you you want to become. <3 <3

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A better you is more important than any challenge goals anyway. <3 you now.  <3 the better you you want to become. <3 <3

 

<3 Awww you're too sweet :3

It just made me realize how much I need templates to make my life structured hahaha.

 

I'm sorry everything has you so stressed out, Kibcy! Just focus on being the best you you can be right now. :)

<3 Thank you Lex!!! You've been so helpful this challenge you have no idea!

And I'm doing better, because I got a haircut and I'm a rockstar now!!!

(my haircut is based on one of Pink's haircuts in one of her video clips... so there :tongue:)

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And in regards to my ex?

This part from There you go by P!nk:

"And I was right when I thought I'd be much better off without you

Had to get myself from round you, cuz my life was all about you

So you say you wanna talk, I don't

Say you wanna change, I won't

Yeah, it's like that

Had your chance, won't take ya back

Now what, whatcha think about that

And when I say I'm through, I'm through

Basically I'm through wit you

Whatcha wanna say

Had to have it your way, had to play games, now you're beggin me to stay"

Yeah so she's a big inspiration for me :tongue:

Not just that she's a rockstar and writes meaningful songs, she's a gymnast as well :D

PS. yeah There you go is from her first album when her label wanted her to do R&B whatever you guys call that.

I got it on her greatest hits album :) So yeah, because I don't have her first album...

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Yeah actually now that I think about it... I used to sing along and all that when I did bicycle escape tactics and cycled to the end of the world! (only not really... but... yeah)

Confession: I have had gym memberships before... then I did EVERYTHING to avoid going XD

I guess gyms aren't for me... haha. Probably because I was in bad shape and had no clue what I was doing :tongue:

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Your hair looks awesome!! I love it!!! How long was it before?

 

Some people aren't gym people, that's just how it is though I wonder if you wouldn't turn into one now that you know what you're doing! :)

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So let me get this straight... I did this impressive memory feat to track down my cycling route (the one I did standard) on google maps.

So according to google maps it's a route of 35.5km. (comes down to nearly 2 hours of cycling google says, sounds about right)

That's what I could do... I can't even grasp that concept now haha.

I did make stops though.

EDIT: I'm gonna just say I was a cyclist... okay?! :D

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Your hair looks awesome!! I love it!!! How long was it before?

 

Some people aren't gym people, that's just how it is though I wonder if you wouldn't turn into one now that you know what you're doing! :)

THANKS!!!! I'm really happy with it!

Not... that much longer haha!!! In the back it had more volume and was maybe only slightly longer.

Then the short side was as long as the long side still pretty much is.

So it's really more the model than it is the length :)

Yeah, well when I'm lvl 10 in my battle log, I'll be finding out as the reward is a gym membership haha!

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So let me get this straight... I did this impressive memory feat to track down my cycling route (the one I did standard) on google maps.

So according to google maps it's a route of 35.5km. (comes down to nearly 2 hours of cycling google says, sounds about right)

That's what I could do... I can't even grasp that concept now haha.

I did make stops though.

HOLY CRAP!!!!!!

That is an insane route! How often would you go for your rides?!

 

 

THANKS!!!! I'm really happy with it!

Not... that much longer haha!!! In the back it had more volume and was maybe only slightly longer.

Then the short side was as long as the long side still pretty much is.

So it's really more the model than it is the length :)

Yeah, well when I'm lvl 10 in my battle log, I'll be finding out as the reward is a gym membership haha!

How awesome a reward is that?! Seriously, that's absolutely brilliant!!! :D

 

And it really is a daring haircut, it's fantastic you took the jump! I'm sure it looks amazing on you (it really does from the back :P )

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I'm sorry that you're so stressed, but at least you have an awesome new haircut!  It really looks great! 

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HOLY CRAP!!!!!!

That is an insane route! How often would you go for your rides?!

 

 

How awesome a reward is that?! Seriously, that's absolutely brilliant!!! :D

 

And it really is a daring haircut, it's fantastic you took the jump! I'm sure it looks amazing on you (it really does from the back :tongue: )

 

It kinda is :tongue: I would probably do that about... once a week at minimum? Often enough haha.

Actually there was this summer when I would take my mom and aunt to work every morning... Like we would cycle there and I would cycle back alone.

So 1 it was freaking EARLY like 6-7am. 2 It was ~30km EVERY MORNING

And I was a couch potato who didn't exercise... still can't grasp.

Yeah I was a little scared, but then I was like "screw this I'm doing it", because you know... sometimes you just gotta.

Thanks! It does :tongue:

 

I'm sorry that you're so stressed, but at least you have an awesome new haircut!  It really looks great!

I'm doing better already <3

Thank you!!! I'm really happy with it :D

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Also... what was I doing this challenge again.

That moment when Kibcy stops using her template and totally loses track of everything.

AT LEAST I CAN'T FEEL LIKE A FAILURE THAT WAY XD

I'm working on being a better me guys. Screw challenge goals!

Working on better a better you is an awesome goal. After reading this, I decided I should re-check my goals. Not only had I forgotten what exactly my food goal was, it didn't even make sense if I had remembered it :redface-new: - ha, Those moments you just have to laugh at yourself and keep it in perspective, and like you said, remember its about improving

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