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Paradigm's Battle Log


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Hi there!

 

I've just finished my first 6 week challenge and feeling pretty pumped from it so I'd like to take it a step further and make a daily battle log to watch what I'm doing. I'm also training for Tough Mudder 2014 and my wedding in 2015 so I need to be super accountable to make sure everything goes to plan! Hoping this will continue to keep me on track. 

 

 

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Lvl. 10 Half-Elf Assassin

 

My Current Challenge

 

My Daily Battle Log

 

 

 

Link to post

I wrote this on my first challenge and thought I'd put it here as a reminder:

 

MY STORY

 

For as long as I can remember video games, fantasy novels and all sorts of other escapist things have been a way for me to get away from my real life. When I realized that I was basically using a bandaid I set out to fix things... And it worked... for a while. About six years ago I went from overweight to the best shape of my life. I loved every second of it and ironically, a video game got me started on that. I wanted to be able to beat Afro Supernova in DDR. I'm not sure if any of you have played that, but it's ridiculously hard. So this was my goal. I NEEDED to beat it. And I did exercise, got in shape and lost about 60 lbs.

 

Sounds great, right?

 

(This is a somewhat in depth story because I feel I need to get it out, people are not forced to eread it!)

 

It was, to a point. I got so fixated on being better, losing weight, getting smaller, that I actually ended up at 100 lbs and I'm 5'8. As you can guess, that's not exactlly a healthy weight for someone of my height! At that point I ended an absuive relationship, but by getting into another (unfortunately) that was even worse. I really had a knack for choosing guys at that point in my life. The new guy slowly isolated me from all of my friends, and lied about me behind my back to HIS friends and family, making it so people were not nice to me and I was more and more cut off from everyone but him. From what I've learned since then, this is pretty common of abusive men. And he'd go through cycles of cheating on me, abusing me, and then being crazy nice and trying to "fix things" by buying my affection. It got progressively worse over the years as well.

 

I was also working in jobs I hated, sedentary, sales of IT equipment to government bodies and educational facilities throughout the country. It was well paying, but very stressful. The bosses tried to keep us making them money by providing breakfasts, lunch and snacks (not every day, but fairly consistently. At least 2-3 days a week). These lunches were always high fat, high sugar, and full of starchy carbs. Add in to the fact that to keep up the energy needed to focus on mundane tasks all day you had to super load with caffine through energy drinks and soda/pop. This lead to me gaining over 120 pounds (I'm ashamed of this fact).

 

So I went from one unhealthy extreme (underweight) to another unhealthy extreme at around 60-80 lbs overweight. And I was so depressed with absolutely no support structure, a job I hated and an abusive partner. I tried repeatedly to leave him, but he always manipulated me back to him. I did what a lot of women do and found someone else to act as a crutch to help me leave the relationship. And for the first time I took what I had always held as "private" and broadcast it to all my friends and family. At this point my now ex broke into my work computer (he had apparently been monitoring my internet history and key logging) email and sent emails to my clients at work. Handling multi-million dollar contracts and whatnot for my employer, they didn't care if it was me or not (although I was given the option to clear my name and fight it if I wanted to) and let me go. I chose not to fight it because... for the first time I was in what Tim Ferriss describes as his "worst case scenario". I left my home I owned with my ex, had relatively little support structure, had now lost my job due to his bullshit and was not happy with anything. But ironically, the losing the job left me with a very hefty severance and a commission cheque had just come in. I had about a years worth of month and could work on rebuilding my life, but this time not with abusive people or even a job I hated holding me back!

 

I ended up realizing what I had always worried about as my "worst case" wasn't so bad and there were always ways to pick things back up. I now, two years later, run my own business (graphic and web design) and do freelance art work for the video game/film indsutries. So my career is absolutely on track to where I want it to be. I have a supportive partner (not abusive this time, woot!) who has helped me so much through everything. I was getting complacent and didn't strive to change my body, just kept saying I wanted to. And then in March I had a miscarriage for an ectopic pregnancy. The doctors say it was lucky, as had it gone even a week longer I would have died and so would hte baby. But as it was, we lost the baby (we didn't even know we were pregnant, because ectopic pregnancies regularily don't present symptoms) and I almost died myself from blood loss. This... made me realize I really need to pursue what I want from life because before things were always a "some day" and when you almost lose your life you realize some day may never come. You need to live every day like it could be your last. I don't want to have regrets so I need to figure out the last piece of my puzzle so I can pursue NEW things.

 

The last piece - My weight and body image.

 

The only thing I feel is holding me back these days from going after my more extreme dreams of traveling the world, and a bunch of other things, is my body image. I'd be happy if my body looked good regardless of the weight. So that's what brings me here... I need help with staying on track so I can resolve my final issue and the final piece of my personal puzzle so I can really go rock the world!

 

Some Stats of How I've Done:

 

June 3rd                        June 16th                     Sep 14                       Oct 22

 

Weight: 217lbs                 203lbs                            196lbs                       185lbs
Hips: 42"                            40.5"                               39"                           35.7"

Waist: 38"                           34"                                 33"                           31"

Thighs: 25.5"                    25.3"                               25"                           24.2"

Calves: 17"                        17.1"                              16.9"                         16.7"

Chest: 42"                         40.5"                               40.0"                         38"

Arms: 14.5"                        14"                                 13.9"                         13.7"

Neck: 15"                           14"                                 13.9"                          13.9"

Forearms: 9.8"                   9.8"                                 9.8"                           9.7"

Shoulders: 45"                  43.2"                               42.8"                          40"

Lvl. 10 Half-Elf Assassin

 

My Current Challenge

 

My Daily Battle Log

 

 

 

Link to post

Some Stats of How I've Done:

 

June 3rd                          Oct 22                            Nov 2                       

 

Weight: 217lbs                 185lbs                           186.4lbs                       
Hips: 42"                            35.7"                               35"                           

Waist: 38"                           31"                                 31"                        

Thighs: 25.5"                    24.2"                               24.2"                          

Calves: 17"                       16.7"                               16.5"                        

Chest: 42"                          38"                                  39"                        

Arms: 14.5"                       13.7"                                13"                         

Neck: 15"                          13.9"                               13.9"                          

Forearms: 9.8"                   9.7"                                 9.8"                          

Shoulders: 45"                   40"                                 42.2"                          

Lvl. 10 Half-Elf Assassin

 

My Current Challenge

 

My Daily Battle Log

 

 

 

Link to post

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