laurabzz getting ready to slay some White Walkers

[laurabzz]

I know exactly what you mean about wearing your body down, between gym, uni, work and partying hard on the weekend i have now ended up sick and its sucks! But reassessing life and goals regularly is what helps you meet them in the end so well done. I hope you enjoy Wolverine as well - i saw it a couple of weeks ago

Hope you're feeling better now! I saw Wolverine a few weeks ago too

 

Nice work on the prioritizing of life-ness.  And I hope you have fun rewatching Wolverine - I still need to see that. 

Lastly, I ate a bunch of crap food this week because The Saboteur is sneaky like that, and I just felt sick.  It's hard being in this spot when crappy food still sounds good but runs havack on your system.  I would retry the clean sweep food week, but that backfired terribly this week, so I'm sticking with my 4 or less hfcs challenge.  Hope this week goes well for you!

We decided to go see another movie, I think we'll go see 2 Guns IF we find time with our super busy schedules. 

Oh, I can totally relate to you here. I ate very badly during the weekend. The saddest part is that I know how bad these foods are and still eat them - where is the logic in that? I don't smoke because it's bad but I can't seem to stop eating unhealthily. So odd.

 

Hmmm your last post really hits home for me too! I've been cutting drastically back on the alcohol lately  - all the things you said + horrible food decisions = it's just not worth it.

 

This weekend was horrible for food also... I need to get it all out of my house, and then I need to do a clean sweep too! Enough is enough, eh?

 

Glad to hear you've decided not to wear yourself into the ground for the sake of some extra money... Another thing that's just not worth it. Enjoy your life instead! As long as you're not about to be tossed onto the streets

In a way, I'm glad to see I'm not alone in this battle against crap food. It's good to know you're not alone Hope you're doing well with this! 

Nah, I've got enough money (I feel like it's somewhat inappropriate to say this these days. I've got simple needs.) I noticed that the more I earn the more I spend - thus I don't save anything actually.

 

and this is kinda a dumb question but when you list the weights your lifting, is that the total weight or each weight? Like dumbells I deadlift 30 pound dumbells ( for a total of 60 pounds). Does that question make sense?

 

Work/sleep/having a life with long hours-I can totally sympathize with you (as I'm sure you know).  Also isn't it crazy how quickly you're body's tolerance for things change? I did a "no fast-food" goal last challenge and I've found a TON of crappy foods I can no longer eat, or risk getting sick. Good luck your goals!

Well I'm lifting a barbell (I didn't know you can deadlift with dumbells haha) so it's definitely the whole weight. 

I know right, I ate ice cream yesterday, I was feeling the consequences until this morning! It never happened when I ate whatever foods. 

Hope you're doing well too

[laurabzz]

Day 22 Monday, 19/08/13

 

Had enough sleep during the weekend so was feeling a little more like myself. Went to kettlebells class and then went to do some lifting - I was just feeling like it. Gym was busy so only did deadlifts and squats (and I was pretty tired from kettlebells). Deadlifted 75kg and squatted 52kg, I can't remember stats now. 

Ate a tart in the evening though... Oh well, still a good start of the week!

 

Day 23 Tuesday.

 

Went to St. Andrews for a day. I become the worst possible person when I go away to new places - sort of 'foodie', wanting to taste everything that's new. So I can two portions of ice cream that day. The best ice cream I've ever had, I can still remember it.. Oh man. 

So yeah - bad day diet-wise, good day life-wise.

 

Day 24, Wednesday.

 

Barbell for today's menu. Did quite well, I can't remember the warm-up sets but main sets were:

Squats 3x5x52,5kg

OHP 3x5x30kg (this is the first time I managed to do 3 sets with this weight. I think part of me is just afraid of the bar falling down on me.)

DL 5x75kg.

 

Also, it took a lot of effort but I'm 100% Paleo today.

 

Hope everyone's doing fine this week

[idealistinfire]

Glad you had a good life-wise day - those are important too   and you did the Paleo thing the next day.  Nice work!

[Eirlys]

Hi Laura

 

Hope the rest of the week is working out for you!  I think you can forgive yourself a couple of scoops of delicious ice cream, it's not like you went to McDonalds  And fab deadlifts/squats, too!

 

Also, I hope you're managing to find a bit of time for you and things aren't as exhausting as they were a few days ago.  Something's gotta give in those circumstances, and we don't want it to be you

[laurabzz]

I'm back to the interwebz. Believe it or not, this is the first time I'm on my laptop since Wednesday and I love it. I did so much.

 

Day 25, Thursday.

 

Kettlebells class was crazy hard/awesome. I think it's getting harder for me now because I reached the kettlebell weight where I have to really work it. I hope I'll level-up to 18kg one day but for now the 16kg one is more than enough. Anyway, I realized in a middle of session that I was continuously repeating these words in my head:

 

Quiet as shadow. Fear cuts deeper than swords. Quick as a snake. Calm as still water. Fear cuts deeper than swords. Strong as a bear. Fierce as a wolverine. Fear cuts deeper than swords. 

 

So I guess books help me everywhere I go haha. I'm finally reading Dune and it's already one of my favourite books of all time.

 

Day 26, Friday.

 

Rest day. Ate a tart. All this week has been a little opposite of the Paleo, I have to say :/

 

Anyway, worked for the bigger part of the day.

 

Day 27, Saturday.

 

Not fitness related but this was probably the best day in my whole summer so far. I went to Edinburgh to the International Edinburgh Book Festival. I also managed to visit an exhibition of one of my favourite Scottish artists - Peter Doig. Edinburgh is as busy as ever in August, with all those festivals going on but I loved it. Well, I just love Edinburgh I guess.  

 

 

I ate a Polish stew with cabbages, sausages, potatoes and other stuff, it was very delicious even though not Paleo. I then saw some Eastern desserts for sale so I bought a few baklavas and something else. They were the worst I ever had so I didn't even finish them. That's my food journey back and forth from Paleo. I'm beating myself up so much for not eating the way I'm supposed to eat and it's making everything even harder but I don't know how to stop feeling so bad about this. I need to work on this guilt thing.

 

I then went to see two wonderful illustrators - Tom Gauld and Stephen Collins. Tom Gauld is an author of incredibly funny book called You're All Just Jealous Of My Jetpack and Collins - of Gigantic Beard That Was Evil. They're amazing guys and it was so amazing to hear them talk and to have a look at how they work.

 

 

 

Then I went to see Neil F***ing Gaiman. There was a lot of blinking involved as I (as always) was trying to hold back the tears of joy. I get very emotional when I go to see things I love (I just can't help it, I don't know why). It was soooo great to spend an hour listening to this amazing author who is like one of my book gods or something. 

 

The day was so full of inspiring things and I finally felt like I'm getting back to being myself, after all these months of stagnation. I mean, I'm doing so much with my life - training, work, studying, reading etc - but those things are not getting me where I want to be in a few years time. I'm a big overachiever - I set up many big goals at once, try hard to get them all achieved and then fail a lot due to lack of time/energy. You really have no idea how many goals I had set up for this summer. I still feel guilty for not achieving all of them but that'll go away I hope.

 

So I said to myself: "Laura, you won't get better at drawing if you won't draw. You won't get published (one day) if you don't create anything. These people got where they are now because they tried and failed a thousand times." 

 

I guess I already know my life related goal for the next challenge

 

Anyway, this was not about fitness but I do hope that some of you guys might relate.

 

Going to check everyone's topics now. I've missed a lot but I really like living without my laptop.

[Ensi]

Remember: eating paleo is hard. If it was easy and unimportant for you, you wouldn't feel bad for not eating paleo all the time. That's how everything that's difficult works, and guilt is a part of it. Just try and direct that negative energy towards positive. Instead of "I'm so stupid, I failed again!" try to think "Next time I'll be prepared for a situation like this". And then you just might be ready for the next time!

 

I'm super jealous about the Book Festival, seems like there were some very interesting authors there

[Fonzico]

Wow, sounds like you've had an amazing time! It's important not to let the quest for fitness replace enjoyment of your life - it's just about finding balance. As long as you get back on track, all is well and you get to have your cake and eat it too.

[idealistinfire]

Book Festival??? I want to go!!!!!!! But yeah, I totally understand getting super emotional about things you love - my bf gave me a hard time yesterday because I (apparently) can't stop talking about a presentation from the Sounders FC (soccer) staff about the behind-the-scenes prep for the team.  I can't help it if I've been floating in midair just thinking about the fact that I got to go it, can I?   I hope you'll post some of the stuff you create in the next challenge

[Eirlys]

Hi Laura

 

Sounds like your preparations against the white walkers are going well, especially if Arya's getting into your head

 

Am glad to hear you found Saturday to be inspiring and have resolved to draw!  Yay on setting next challenge goal

 

I can relate to setting loads of goals and then somehow not making.  It's so hard to focus, but sounds like you know deep down what you want to do!

 

p.s. I like the jetpack-author cartoon you posted

[Amandaba]

so glad you hear you've been enjoying life lately AND continuing to stay or get back on track with your goals! 

[laurabzz]

Remember: eating paleo is hard. If it was easy and unimportant for you, you wouldn't feel bad for not eating paleo all the time. That's how everything that's difficult works, and guilt is a part of it. Just try and direct that negative energy towards positive. Instead of "I'm so stupid, I failed again!" try to think "Next time I'll be prepared for a situation like this".

 

I'm super jealous about the Book Festival, seems like there were some very interesting authors there

 

Aww now I totally want to watch the Lion King again. This was my favourite childhood movie. Yeah we even had some more famous ones as well, like S. Rushdie, M. Atwood etc, but I focused on the ones I love. It was an awesome day, truly. 

 

Wow, sounds like you've had an amazing time! It's important not to let the quest for fitness replace enjoyment of your life - it's just about finding balance. As long as you get back on track, all is well and you get to have your cake and eat it too.

Your words are so true but it took me a long time to realise that. Oh well, learning from mistakes

 

Book Festival??? I want to go!!!!!!! But yeah, I totally understand getting super emotional about things you love - my bf gave me a hard time yesterday because I (apparently) can't stop talking about a presentation from the Sounders FC (soccer) staff about the behind-the-scenes prep for the team.  I can't help it if I've been floating in midair just thinking about the fact that I got to go it, can I?   I hope you'll post some of the stuff you create in the next challenge

I think I'll have more free time once I start studying (oh the irony) so I'll definitely get more serious with drawing

 

Hi Laura

 

Sounds like your preparations against the white walkers are going well, especially if Arya's getting into your head

 

Am glad to hear you found Saturday to be inspiring and have resolved to draw!  Yay on setting next challenge goal

 

I can relate to setting loads of goals and then somehow not making.  It's so hard to focus, but sounds like you know deep down what you want to do!

 

p.s. I like the jetpack-author cartoon you posted

Check that author out - his comics are hilarious. They had a slide show of his comics during the show (the screen was behind their backs) so the audience would giggle at random moments during the event and both guys looked very confused

 

so glad you hear you've been enjoying life lately AND continuing to stay or get back on track with your goals! 

Thanks

[laurabzz]

Day 29, Monday, 26/08/13.

 

Woo kettlebells! Worked my arse off during the class, really tried to give it all I had. Oh my sore muscles... The love for the training is coming back again, when I'm finally well rested.

I went to see 2 Guns movie with a guy from work. 'Twas funny and very simple movie, exactly what I needed.

 

Day 30, Tuesday.

 

Had some serious barbell training done. My arms are still sore. I think my weights stayed the same because I'd like to focus on my form this week. But I did more sets and reps than I usually do because I was just feeling like it.

Also, one amazing thing: when I see other girls lifting (usually they're from some sports club in my uni, so they're quite strong) I always think they'll look down on me, because I'm an obvious noob there. For some reason, I'm more afraid of girls than guys at the gym. And what actually happens is that the girls are the most friendliest of everyone there. One day, one girl complimented my tshirt, I was so shocked then tuesday, two girls, who can do clean and jerk with some serious weights like it's nothing, come up and are being the nicest people to me ever. I can't believe it. Girls, why are you so nice? I love this.

 

Also, I miscalculated and went to work one hour earlier. I should pay more attention to things

 

Day 31, Wednesday.

 

Woo, a whole full month!

I'm resting today as I really needed this.

Went to Ikea, bought loads of stuff and had Swedish meatballs for the first time ever! I can't call it a proper rest day though as I was on my feet for 5 hours straight, choosing the plates, bedding and other stuff I don't need

 

Ok I'm gonna go now, got to eat a super delicious roast chicken that's waiting on my newly bought plate. Nom.

 

P.S. Oh, almost forgot, a friend who hasn't seen me for a month or so told me I've lost weight! Woohoo. And I bought trousers that are a size smaller and they fit perfectly (I'm not saying I've lost that much weight, I think my previous trousers were already a little too big for me. Still. It's so cool.)

 

Hope you all are doing well!

[idealistinfire]

That whole post rocks.  And it's inspiring.  You are totally awesome Laurabzz and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!  Congrats on making new friends, lifting more weights, taking rest and fitting smaller jean sizes

[Fonzico]

So much awesome! I'm loving all the kettlebell action going on around here lately - y'all have inspired me, I'm taking a class starting next week!

 

And boy, (re: your gym experience) doesn't that just show you how incredibly far a little kindness can go? It takes so little effort to do, for such a huge return: making someone's day! Love it

 

Also, there's nothing that can quite compare to some outside validation that what we're doing is working, eh? No, we don't need it, but holy cow does it feel good.

 

I love hearing all your successes, keep it up!

[laurabzz]

That whole post rocks.  And it's inspiring.  You are totally awesome Laurabzz and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!  Congrats on making new friends, lifting more weights, taking rest and fitting smaller jean sizes

Aw thanks! These were only my work trousers sadly (so the sizing is a little different), the jeans will have to wait just now. 

 

So much awesome! I'm loving all the kettlebell action going on around here lately - y'all have inspired me, I'm taking a class starting next week!

 

And boy, (re: your gym experience) doesn't that just show you how incredibly far a little kindness can go? It takes so little effort to do, for such a huge return: making someone's day! Love it

 

Also, there's nothing that can quite compare to some outside validation that what we're doing is working, eh? No, we don't need it, but holy cow does it feel good.

 

I love hearing all your successes, keep it up!

Woo kettlebells is amazing thing. Depends on the instructor though but I hope you like it!

 

Exactly, it definitely feels good to see that others see the difference. Sometimes you just don't see it yourself (like I don't see any progress with my own eyes).

 

Hope you're doing well!

[laurabzz]

My Wednesday ended up with me learning how to do handstands so I wouldn't call it a proper rest day haha. It's quite fun, you should try it guys!

 

Day 32, Thursday.

 

Woo kettlebells again. Defeated that tiny little voice that said 'you should stay at home, get some sleep...'. And it was hard and I was sweaty and I loved it. Also, a day of 100% Paleo I think.

 

Day 33, Friday.

 

Got some barbell training done (which means all my strength training is done for a week).

This session was rockin. Did squats, bench press and deadlifts. My bench press looks a bit steadier now, thank god. 

Also, accidentally deadlifted 80kg instead of 75kg (my whole life is one big accident haha). Just miscalculated and put more weight on the bar. So I guess I have my new record!

Later I was working a long shift and every time I was stressed I would say to myself 'I just deadlifted 80kg today' and I would smile and it would feel great.

 

Day 34, Saturday.

 

My 'proper' rest day. Just chilling. I was very sore all over. I can't remember the day when I wasn't sore. I'm not complaining. Had ice cream and pizza. Whatevs.

 

Day 35, Sunday.

 

Working again. 4 days till my holidays! I've got bruises all over my arms from kettlebells, I look like a victim of abuse... It's good that my work shirt hides my bruises haha. I'm also accidentally fasting, just not hungry.

 

So excited about my holidays! I'm going home to see my family and none of them have met a 'new' me. On one hand, it'll be hard to eat Paleo while I'm there with everyone trying to feed me as if I was starving out here. On the other, I'm feeling quite confident with my health choices for the first time in my life so I know it'll be okay. I just spent 2 hours on Skype with my mum. She loves cooking and she's very excited to cook the meals for me (well, I'll be taking advantage here, not even sorry). She asked many questions about what I do and don't eat and she's preparing this massive barbecue feast with tons of meat and veggies.She said she'll do tiramisu as well and I'm not going to complain here.

 

Ahhh, I can't wait!

 

Also, I got my brand new Google Nexus 7 tablet finally, it's so awesome. I barely use my laptop anymore.

[laurabzz]

Not very related but I wanted to share the dreams I've been having since I started strength training and joined NF in general. I never in my life had such dreams

 

Last night I had a dream that I was kidnapped and taken to the middle of the woods by like 4 guys maybe. I then escaped and started a very long journey home across the mountains (the proper big mountains with snow and stuff). I had very little with me but I burned fires during the night to keep me warm and ate what I found in the forest. I've heard those guys chasing me from time to time and saying 'she won't make it anyway, we'll catch her'. I woke up before the conclusion so I don't know if I escaped. The most important thing was - I know the dream sounds scary but I wasn't scared at all. I just kept running, surviving and I knew I'm gonna make it. I think it's related to my new fitness mentality somehow.

 

Other night, I had a dream that I could do one legged squats. Just like that. I was very surprised at myself but I was so proud. So yeah, one more tiny goal for my life.

 

Again, I had a dream that I was hiding and running from someone but I knew how to hide properly and I knew how to survive so it wasn't scary.

 

So... strange dreams huh.

[idealistinfire]

I recently had a escape-the-kidnappers dream too, although I got to kick some butts in mine.  It was awesome   I told my bf I wanted more dreams like that one.  So I agree, it's a good dream, even if you were confused at the end.

 

Also, so happy for you that your mum is getting on board to cook things to help you stay on track. That's sooo cool!

[laurabzz]

(I'm typing this with on my tablet so it a might be brief)

Another great week ahead.

Monday was busy, working two jobs and all. Went to kettlebells, super hard. I need to work on my press ups. Had two cookies and started questioning my food decisions as the cookies weren't that good. I mean, the reason why I bought them was mental, it wasn't even because I craved them. I think it's my old mentality where I think that only unhealthy food is worth buying as a treat. I need to get some almond butter. I had fresh figs on Sunday, 'twas awesome. Anyway. I didn't eat anything unhealthy at work so that's a big plus.

Tuesday. I was sooo pumped today. It was my last workout before holidays sadly, so I had to give it all I got. Also... there was a rugby team training near me so that was some bonus for my eyes

All in kg, not pounds.

Squats:

2x5x20

5x40

3x5x50 (I slept 4 hours last night so I thought I'd take it easy here).

OHP

2x5x20

3x5x30 (I'm STILL struggling with this one. Ugh.)

DL

4x60

5x80

2x90 (whaaaaat? Yes, it's my new record!!)

Deadlifts: so here I finally reached my goal to deadlift my own weight (yes I just told everyone how much I weighed) (I'm 5'8" so I'm not THAT heavy). The form wasn't as good as I would have wanted but it's still my personal best. I'm soooo proud of this one.

My weight: I should have said that I deadlifted my pre-challenge weight as I weighted myself today and I officially lost 3kg (6,6 lbs) since the start. Which in fact is a bit surprising as I didn't plan that (with all that pizza and ice cream and all that jazz). I really hope I'm losing bodyfat and not muscle. Going to measure myself soon too as my challenge officially stops on Thursday when I go on holiday. I'll do bodyweight exercises when I'm gone, I promise. My house is in the woods, a perfect place to exercise.

That's all for now, I think.

Gonna go eat some spinach.

[idealistinfire]

Sweet work on the PR with deadlifting!  That's soooo cool :)

Also, if it makes you feel better, I'm 5'8" and during this challenge I've weighted anywhere between 186lbs - 198lbs (84kg - 89kg).  And I'm pretty sure that there is some rule around here about not being worried where you come from but only focusing on where you are going.  And the fact that you can lift that much weight means you're doing something right   Keep up the good work!

[laurabzz]

Sweet work on the PR with deadlifting!  That's soooo cool :)

Also, if it makes you feel better, I'm 5'8" and during this challenge I've weighted anywhere between 186lbs - 198lbs (84kg - 89kg).  And I'm pretty sure that there is some rule around here about not being worried where you come from but only focusing on where you are going.  And the fact that you can lift that much weight means you're doing something right   Keep up the good work!

Whoa that's awesome! I mean, about our similarities. Living in Scotland for a while now, I automatically assume that everyone's shorter than me (no offence to scots)

Now I'll have a goal to reach 84kg to match you :-) (although if not losing more weight means gaining muscle and losing bodyfat, I'm okay with that too).

[idealistinfire]

(although if not losing more weight means gaining muscle and losing bodyfat, I'm okay with that too).

As you should be

[Fonzico]

Wow, amazing job with your deadlifts! there's something that's just beautiful and epic about being able to lift your own body mass... The highest of fives to you!

Also, I totally hear your about the whole cookies situation.. I'm really trying to shift my thinking towards food treats that are still good for you... it's hard to let go of old comfort and/or celebration foods even once they start to taste bad, you have to kind of rewire your brain! But there really are so many delicious and good-for-you foods out there, we can find replacements

[Cort]

Nice deadlift!  Props!

[Eirlys]

Hi Laura

 

Reading up on your weights progress over the last week or so is fantastic - you've done super well with your persistence, and well done on the new PBs and lifting your own bodyweight!!  Not to mention congrats on fitting into smaller-size trousers

 

Hope you enjoy your (well-earned) holiday!