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Loki

Loki's Still up to No Good

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Diet) Very good, after some very rough starts (not eating enough, fighting temptation to skip meals); hydration excellent.

 

100 Miles) 2 walking, 22.5/100

 

Climbing) Double-dipped for flexibility and balance with the current mini-challenge, and did a bunch of new yoga poses. Also, spent most of the day carrying around my one year old who seems to have decided that his legs don't work and the world will end if I'm not lifting him. 

 

Life Goal) Miserable failure today. It was the kind of day where I doubt everything about myself, especially weight loss. I think "What if I didn't really lose weight, I'm just cheating and pulling the tape measure tighter? I haven't really gone down any clothing sizes, I just started off in clothes too baggy and moved to clothes too tight, which I then stretched out severely?" When I get in this head-space, I think of all the stuff fat acceptance people write (I used to have a friend who was very into fat acceptance, and I actually had to cut ties with her over how damaging and depressing hearing that stuff was) about "set-points" and how the body "chooses" a weight that it will refuse to budge from. I start to think what I'm doing is futile, I'm not losing any weight and never will. Makes me think that I'll never be normal, never fit into any of my fun clothing again, never be anything more than a fat, worthless piece of crap. So, I guess the closest thing to a self-compliment that I can manage today is: At least I'm still here posting, meaning I'm capable of allowing intellectual to overrule emotions in part. I don't know if that is good enough to count though.

 

And as I mentioned before, my kid was incredibly high-maintenance today. He needed to be held all day and threw titanic tantrums whenever I besmirched his baby-honor by putting him down. Though this did lead to a funny moment when I was lying on the floor for yoga and he waddled over to plop Goodnight, Moon on my stomach and page through it as though he was reading. Sure, he got offended when I moved him and the book, but it was still a funny moment in an otherwise depressing day. (We ended up compromising--he allowed me to do yoga only if I was reciting the book from memory for him. Any bonus points for that?).

 

 

100 miles that is inspiring! I wish you the best!

 

100 miles is looking less daunting now that I'm getting into a rhythm of things. I mean, a week and a half it I might clear the quarter mark! Thanks for the wishes!

 

 

Hey loki, nice job! it sounds like you're well on your way to completing your goals.

 

The self compliment idea is a great goal. It's the little things such as that which help our wellness and confidence.

 

Also with jogging, I personally hate it and opt to usually walk, but what works for me is forcing myself to do an errand on foot so once you get there you have to return. i.e. walking to the bank, grocery store, a friends house etc. I don't know if thats applicable where you live, also walks in the woods beat the pants off of sidewalks, roads, treadmills.

 

Good luck lady!

 

Thanks for the support! The compliments are so much harder than they look--by far, harder than the physical challenges. I used to do errand on bike (I live slightly too far out for walking), but recently haven't been able to get other people to take long enough turns watching the baby. I can take him for walks, but not biking, so that limits me to non-errand walks. But I agree with you--walking with a purpose/goal is so much easier.

 

 

Sounds like you are doing good, keep up the good work :)

 

Thank you for the kind words!

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Ahh don't get too caught up in the bad thoughts.  We all get them too.  I just try to think about how this is all just going to take me time.  I lived all of the life that I can remember overweight.  Every day is a fight.  Today I was discussing with myself (I know that sounds crazy, but sometimes I feel like I have discussions with myself in my head ;) ), about how it sucks to think I can't have pizza, or can't have this or that.  Then I was telling myself, I can have all that if I want.  Just not right now.  We have to fight.  Every day is a fight.  What I want is more important to me then getting that cookie or slice of pizza.  Then I started thinking about how amazing it will be to get under 300lbs.  Then imagine 200lbs.

 

Some days I can't always win the fight and settle on being lazy and then telling myself all day about see , look at you being lazy and not doing anything.  I can be pretty rough on myself too.  But we push on :)

 

Kids can put us though some stressful stuff too.  I had days where apparently the floor was to not be touched by the little one too :)

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I'm sorry to hear that you had a bad day. We all have doubts sometimes. But however slow it is you are making progress, you are loosing weight and you are on the right path. even when sometimes you cant see it happening. so don't doubt yourself. I hope today is better for you.

 

Addison

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So, I guess the closest thing to a self-compliment that I can manage today is: At least I'm still here posting, meaning I'm capable of allowing intellectual to overrule emotions in part. I don't know if that is good enough to count though.

 

I this definitely counts.  Complimenting ourselves can be very difficult as you know, even more so when we get into that negative state of mind.  The fact that you were able to realize that and let your intellect show through and you still have a good diet, miles logged, and climbing progress report is impressive and shows, despite being in that state of mind, that you're still striving to achieve your goals.  And with doing a good self compliment and accepting compliments from NF in the same post, I think you did well on your Life Goal yesterday :)

 

Like Tate and Addison said, we all get into that head space and just need to push on.  Find that something that will keep you moving forward, even if still in the frame of mind.  Maybe even use it as motivation, which I know sounds weird, but I have on many occasions put on a song that would normally fueled that line of thinking and then push harder on the elliptical or treadmill, or got an extra lift or two when doing weights

 

Good luck and hopefully today is better!  

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Sure enough, today was better.

Diet) Not spectacular, but still within my acceptable perimeters. (I set a minimum standard that I usually do much better than. Today I was better than minimum, but not by as much as normal). My hydration was excellent though.

100 Miles) 1 walked, 2.25 on elliptical for 3.25, making my total 25.75/100

Climbing) My bent over dumbell rows are up to 50lbs, shoulder press still 20, and for skull rushers had to drop down to 22.5 because of soreness from yesterday's baby-holding marathon. I'm trying to figure out a set-up I can assemble in order to do inverse rows; suggestions are welcome.

Life Goal) Much better today. I was more optimistic in general. I'm thinking of organizing my weight loss and muscle building goals into a two year plan, since 2015 is such a nice number to reach a big goal. And the compliment of the day: I'm an idea-generator.

Ahh don't get too caught up in the bad thoughts.  We all get them too.  I just try to think about how this is all just going to take me time.  I lived all of the life that I can remember overweight.  Every day is a fight.  Today I was discussing with myself (I know that sounds crazy, but sometimes I feel like I have discussions with myself in my head ;) ), about how it sucks to think I can't have pizza, or can't have this or that.  Then I was telling myself, I can have all that if I want.  Just not right now.  We have to fight.  Every day is a fight.  What I want is more important to me then getting that cookie or slice of pizza.  Then I started thinking about how amazing it will be to get under 300lbs.  Then imagine 200lbs.

 

Some days I can't always win the fight and settle on being lazy and then telling myself all day about see , look at you being lazy and not doing anything.  I can be pretty rough on myself too.  But we push on :)

 

Kids can put us though some stressful stuff too.  I had days where apparently the floor was to not be touched by the little one too :)

Thanks for the pep-talk. It was very helpful to read this morning as I started my day (and most definitely contributed to my improved mood)!

I'm sorry to hear that you had a bad day. We all have doubts sometimes. But however slow it is you are making progress, you are loosing weight and you are on the right path. even when sometimes you cant see it happening. so don't doubt yourself. I hope today is better for you.

 

Addison

Thanks for having faith in me! I think the most valuable thing about this site, for me, is having others around who can have faith in me when my own confidence falters. Again, thanks for your support.

I this definitely counts.  Complimenting ourselves can be very difficult as you know, even more so when we get into that negative state of mind.  The fact that you were able to realize that and let your intellect show through and you still have a good diet, miles logged, and climbing progress report is impressive and shows, despite being in that state of mind, that you're still striving to achieve your goals.  And with doing a good self compliment and accepting compliments from NF in the same post, I think you did well on your Life Goal yesterday :)

 

Like Tate and Addison said, we all get into that head space and just need to push on.  Find that something that will keep you moving forward, even if still in the frame of mind.  Maybe even use it as motivation, which I know sounds weird, but I have on many occasions put on a song that would normally fueled that line of thinking and then push harder on the elliptical or treadmill, or got an extra lift or two when doing weights

 

Good luck and hopefully today is better!

Thank you for such lovely words; they really helped me put things into perspective. I like your music idea--it kind of reminds me how when I need to be cheered up, I grab the darkest book I can find and somehow it does the trick. I'll have to look at my music to see if anything will do the trick...

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Quick update for a very busy day.

Diet) decent enough, not enough water though.

100 Miles) Only one, walking. 26.75/100

Climbing) Nil

Life Goal) I caught myself deflecting compliments from myself to my outfit. But on the bright side, I wasn't hiding in baggy crap and forced myself to dress well (the brightness and baggyness of my outfits seem to act as self-esteem barometers!). Compliment of the day: I'm excellent at public speaking.

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I have a hydration goal too! I bring a water bottle with me everywhere. My friends think I'm weird when they show up with six-packs of beer and I'm carrying a liter of water.

 

I love your self-compliment goal. And yeah, I hate that we somehow got conditioned not to outright accept compliments. One of my friends said that men don't say thank you to compliments because they see them as facts, women don't say thank you because they see them as lies.

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Another supershort update, as I've been up late working.

Diet) Diet was good, but forgot to drink enough.

100 Miles) Nil, rain and work.

Climbing) Nil, work.

Life Goal) Compliment of the Day: I have good instincts for reading people.

I have a hydration goal too! I bring a water bottle with me everywhere. My friends think I'm weird when they show up with six-packs of beer and I'm carrying a liter of water.

 

I love your self-compliment goal. And yeah, I hate that we somehow got conditioned not to outright accept compliments. One of my friends said that men don't say thank you to compliments because they see them as facts, women don't say thank you because they see them as lies.

Woah, that bit about men and women's responses to compliments just blew my mind!

I need to invent a water bottle that will beep annoyingly if I get too far away from it. I just keep forgetting the darn thing!

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Busy day; short update. You know the drill.

Diet) Solid

100 Miles) 3, bringing me to 29.75/100. If I'd been paying more attention, would've gone the extra quarter mile.

Climbing) Very easy tree climbing, and canoe rowing.

Compliment of the Day: I'm a fast learner.

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Looks like this week will be an incredibly busy one, so my updates will probably be very sparse and I won't have as much time to read and comment on other people's threads as I'd like :-(

Diet) Solid, hydration good today.

100 Miles) 1.75, 31.5/100

Climbing) Standard weightlifting routine. Next workout I will be increasing my weights. Oh, but I did measure my three walls. C grade wall: 38in. B grade wall: 45.5in. A grade wall: 51in. I currently have a C, but have not attempted B yet.

Compliment of the Day: I'm good at altering recipes.

I just read your life quest. That is also inspiring. Great life goal. I might steal that for the next challenge.

I'm glad it inspires you! I fully encourage other people to try it. It isn't until you force yourself to give yourself compliments that you realize just how much of a block society encourages us to have against positive self-thoughts. Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

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Diet) Crappy, hydration poor.

100 Miles) 2.5, 37/100

Climbing) Challenge complete! Climbed my B and A walls. So, while I've won full points on this goal, I'm still going to keep up looking for more walls to climb as well as keeping my strength training going, perhaps aimed at pull ups.

Compliment of the Day: I'm good at plotting courses.

Frustrating, incredibly busy day.

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Diet) Decent, hydration poor. For diet, working on the mini challenge of three new foods I had an interesting dinner. I tried out the shirataki noodles that are low carb friendly, with a low carb marinara sauce and a bunch of veggies and chicken, since pasta used to be my favorite. It wasn't bad, but wasn't good enough for me to try again. I may put the noodles in a stirfry though. For a side, I roasted Brussel sprouts and had them for the first time. Much more successful! I'll definitely have them again. For my last new food, I think I'll go for a fruit...

100 Miles) 3, 40/100

Climbing) Playground at children's party, was the up-high parent assisting the less coordinated toddlers and keeping them from falling. Used this as an excuse to climb everything I could.

Compliment: I think very quickly.

Just catching up...CONGRATS on the climbing challenge!  That is awesome.  

 

Sucks that things have been busy, but looks like you are keeping up with your goals :)

 

Keep up the good work...

 

PS - I saw this and thought of you: A beeping device to attach to water bottles (in development thought): http://techcrunch.com/2013/04/14/jomi-drink-tracker/

Haha! I need that water bottle beeping thing!

Thanks for the well-wishing. I just can't wait until next week when I can breathe and finally catch up on everyone else's thread. I'm just barely getting my miles in these days, and can't afford falling farther behind on that challenge.

Hopefully today isn't so frustrating!

MUCH less frustrating, though just as busy! Hope your day went well, and I look forward to catching up with your thread in about, say, four work deadlines from now!

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MUCH less frustrating, though just as busy! Hope your day went well, and I look forward to catching up with your thread in about, say, four work deadlines from now!

Try to take it easy when you can!  Don't worry, I'll still be around for you to catch up on ;)

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Super fast update.

Diet) Terrible, hydration started bad but improved.

100 Miles) 5, 45/100

Climbing) Helped a friend move, carried lots of heavy things up a few floors.

Compliment) My primary baby-carrying arm is ridiculously strong.

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Diet) Pretty bad, hydration good. Tried my friend's pinto beans, while not great for as low carb as I go, it is a new food and therefore I've achieved my three for the mini challenge!

100 Miles) 2.5. 48.2/100

Climbing) Mild, strength-requiring housework.

Compliment) Was with some of my female friends and uncritically fell into social bonding through self-insults and compliment rejection. :-( Oops. Well, compliment of the day: I'm a good tipper (this challenge is getting hard)

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Diet) So-so, hydration bad.

100 Miles) nope.

Climbing) Carrying downed tree branches

Compliment) My work is dependable.

Thankfully, moving to a merely insane workload from the much more severe "dear god why would you do that to yourself?!" workload of this past week.

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Super fast update.

Diet) Terrible, hydration started bad but improved.

100 Miles) 5, 45/100

Climbing) Helped a friend move, carried lots of heavy things up a few floors.

Compliment) My primary baby-carrying arm is ridiculously strong.

My sis and nieces visited this weekend, and I totally get moms having strong baby carrying arms haha.  Here's to a strong and hopefully less than merely insane work week!

 

One other idea on the water, could you set a cell phone alarm to remind yourself to drink water at different times?

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