Countess D'If - Battle Log of Awesomeness!

[Countess D'If]

100 Days!!

This is getting serious, y'all. 100 days!

 

I am not at the gym right now because I am still at work. I'm not actually doing work, I'm doing homework. It's 7:00 at night. I was supposed to do laundry tonight. Ugh. 

 

I did get a lot done today. And I didn't have any soda or fast food, even though I have money. I did have some doughnuts, but I'm not turning down birthday doughnuts (not my birthday, but still).

[Countess D'If]

99 Days!!!!!!

 

 

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

[Countess D'If]

98 days!

 

For reasons that I am way too tired to explain, I’m in Reno. 

[Countess D'If]

X amount of days. I’ll explain later. I’m just so freakin happy to be in my own bed

[Sylvaa]

8 hours ago, Countess D'If said:

X amount of days. I’ll explain later. I’m just so freakin happy to be in my own bed

 

I saw your FB posts - ugh for your weekend! Here's to bathing in antibacterial agents!

[Countess D'If]

I am having a meltdown today. For the first time since I started taking the prozac. I feel like this could escalate into an actual panic attack. I THINK I can talk myself out of it. I THINK this is just me needing to get my arms around all the shit that this weekend fucked up. I think that once I get this out of my brain and onto paper, I should be OK. 

 

First, I am graduating law school in

94 days! 

I was on track. I was feeling super good. I was shiny. Then, this weekend attacked. 

 

I got a call on Thursday night. It was my older sister. She was freaking out. Apparently, my mom’s husband is having another heart attack (first one this year!) and he’s in the hospital (first time this year!). Well, he was speaking to a doctor and she was asking him how he was doing. He said something along the lines of “The pain is so bad I would honestly rather just kill myself.” Or some melodramatic nonsense like that. Well, you can’t say that to doctors while you’re in the hospital because they have the power to put you on a 72-hour psych hold. Which is exactly what happened. 


 

So, my sister freaks out. She’s screaming and being stupid and wringing her hands and being a pain in the ass. I told her to 1) shut up, 2) take her meds, and 3) calm the fuck down and act like an adult. It’s not that big a deal, it’s not like they said they were going to take him out back and shoot him. 

 

She eventually did all those things and we formed a plan going forward. (Which sounds adult, but it was pretty much keep-quiet-and-do-what-the-hospital-tells-you-becuase-you’re-a-grown-ass-woman-stop-being-a-drama-queen). The hospital is dealt with, the psychologist is coming first thing Friday morning to either certify him a suicide risk or lift the hold. Oh, and — side note —  it’s not like he was going to leave even if he hadn’t been placed on the psych hold. He was going to be admitted into the hospital anyway because he needs ya know. . . medical care. 

 

Everyone decides to go home and go to sleep.

 

I get a call about 45 minuses later from my older sister. She’s barfing. My little sister is barfing. They’re both incapacitatedly ill. The whole cycle of screaming and wailing and gnashing of teeth starts from the beginning again, except this time with the stomach flu. They’re a mess. They need help.

 

I get a plane ticket for Friday afternoon because these ladies need help ASAP. 

 

Unfortunately, I had a whole boat load of stuff to do at work. I have a boat load of homework. This is literally the worst timing in the whole wide world. 

 

I fly. I arrive. My MIL picks me up. We pick up Midget Mayhem at Boys & Girls Club. They drop me off at the plague house. I go in, I say hi to my grandmother. You may have heard of her? Satan? Luficer? The Prince of Darkness? That’s my grandmother. The single most evil human being on the planet. She’s 94 and she’s still the fucking devil. She hates me. I hate her. We have an understanding. 

 

I go check on my sisters. They both have fevers of 103º. “When was the last time you took some IBProfen?”



 

BOTH of them : “I haven’t taken anything today.”

 



Well, you’re dumb. I get that you don’t feel good, but if you don’t get these fevers down, you’re going to the hospital. You want to go to the hospital? THEN TAKE A FEVER REDUCER. 

 

Little I understand. She can’t take ANY kind of pills on an empty stomach. That’s just how she’s built. Older? Yeah, she’s just lazy. I get that you want to sleep. But fr srs, y’all. 

 

I force Little to eat some Jello. I some pills in her. I get some pills in Older. Neither of them have eaten since yesterday. I’m OK with that, but they also aren’t taking any water/liquids. I load them up with waters and gatorade (“I don’t want it! It doesn’t taste good!” BITCH YOU WANT PEDIALITE? DRINK THE GATORADE!). I strip and re-make the beds. I take the laundry away. I turn the A/C on full blast. I clean the bath room. I spot wash a bit of the hall carpet (accident).

 

You know

 

I mom.

 

They really needed help. If I hadn’t hydrated and medicated them, Little would have been in the hospital that night. Maybe Older, but DEFINITELY Little. 

 

Because on top of all this, Little has been having a REALLY bad shingles out break. Again, she can’t take pills on an empty stomach and she couldn’t eat, so she can’t take her shingles meds. So she’s been suffering in two kinds of agony. Fever of 103º + no water + no food + crippling shingles attack = hospital trip. 

 

I’m not saying they are dumb. But neither of them are getting points on this assignment.

 

Then I went to the hospital to see THE CAUSE OF ALL THIS. He’s fine. He’s been discharged from the hold. He’s been scheduled for a morning esophagogastroduodenoscopy (which is doctor for “swallow this hose”). 

I leave him.

 

I go to his/my mom’s house. Which is where I’ve stashed my family! Midget Mayhem is 100% asleep. So it’s me and The Marine. Oh yeah!

 

And way more importantly, MY DOGGIES! I missed them! They missed me!!!!

 

We slept in. We had a nice relaxing morning. We ran out in the field (My mom lives on a ranch in the middle of nowhere. It’s awesome), we chased the dogs, the dogs chased us. We had us a nice Saturday. 

 

I went an woke up my sisters. Both of their fevers had broken (duh, because meds) and neither had thrown up all night. Still bad diarrhea, yeah. But no vomiting. I take this as a good sign. Little is still a mess, so I tell her that she needs to stay in bed and drink water like it’s her job. Older is able to make it downstairs and eat a banana. 

 

I go to breakfast with my family. IHOP! w00t!

 

They let the idiot out of the hospital and I take him home. #A, he’s fine and #B, he just wants to be left alone. So I don’t even have to see his dumb face for the rest of the weekend. That’s awesome. 

 

I took my sisters some McDonalds french fries. I was tying to get them to eat and french fries were literally the only thing that sounded good to Older. SO I thought I’d see if they could keep them down. And Success! Older AND Little ate them all and kept them down! Yay! I’m a good nurse. 

 

Then I took my little family to the movies and it was glorious. You HAVE to go see The Greatest Showman. It is SO good!

 

On Sunday, Little was still green around the gills, so I doped her. There was no reason for her to be awake during all that pain. I maaaaaaaay have told her my anxiety medicine was just “really strong Benadryl” . . . . . .  she’s weird about mental health meds. Apparently she slept until like, 8 o’clock that night.

 

Anyway, I went and did a Walmart run for them, more Jello and orange juice and gatorade and stuff. We watched the Super Bowl (suck it, tom brady!) and that was my weekend adventure.

 

We left for the airport at 3:45. I JUST made the plane, then when I did get seated, I swallowed funny and choked for like, five minutes. The asshole next to me had a FUCKING MELT DOWN. Like I was intentionally here JUST TO GET HIM SICK WITH THE FLU!!!! Flu attack!!!! He was all, *sigh* and “Jesus Christ!” and “You’ve got to be kidding me!” And meanwhile I’m sitting there literally choking so hard I thought I was going to barf. The flight attendant gave me some water. And I didn’t die. That was nice. 

 

I caught the asshole giving me the stank eye just before we landed. So I said, “I was choking, by the way. But I want to thank you for your compassion!” He didn’t look at me again. What a garbage person. 

 

I went straight from the airport to my externship. I don’t know how I made it though the work day yesterday. I know I nodded off several times. I left as soon as I could. I got some fast food and went to class.

 

Then I went home and slept. I overslept, but I got here (externship) at nine and here I am. I was making a list of everything I need to do to catch up and I was having a panic attack, so I decided to write down all my adventures. I do feel better now. I have a boat load of stuff to do, but I feel like I can handle it. 

 

It was interesting, when my family was melting down and I was rushing to get out of work and packed and to the airport, I didn’t have a panic attack. I handled it really well. I was calm, I took everything I need, I stayed o the phone with Gary so he could remind me of stuff like pills and toothbrush, because even at my best I’d forget that stuff. He even commented, “You’re handing this really well!” 

 

I used to handle stress after the stressful event. I usually had the strength and energy and stamina and wherewithal to deal with IT in the moment, then after the stress was over, I’d get sick or whatever. I think that’s kind of what happened this morning, the stress is over and I’ve dealt with it, so now I have this reserve of stress energy that needed to be dispelled.

That’s what I’m assuming, anyway. 

 

But for now, I’m ready to get to work and get stuff done. I’ll chat to you later!

[Plazmotic]

Holy crap dude, that's one hell of a weekend indeed. 

[Countess D'If]

93 Days!!

As you can probably imagine, the weekend kind of ruined my life. So I'm starting from scratch tomorrow. I hope to get my food cooked and prepped. I want to get to the gym. I want to focus on the weight and the diet and the health and stuff. 

 

I need to get gas before I head home, though. 

[Lee Jun-fan]

You can do it. We are all here behind you. 

[Countess D'If]

90 DAYS! HOLY CARP!!!

I've finally got my head screwed on straight again. I have 90 DAYS! I think I can lose >20 pounds in that time with a VERY good diet and daily exercise. And no more familytornados. I'm going to eat well, blog here, walk, run, lift, spin, maybe do some yoga. 

 

I have a fitbit again (I lifted it from my family as a health care fee 

)

 

 

So if anyone wants to do some challenges, I always think those are fun. 

 

TODAY, I run and lift

 

[Countess D'If]

89 Days!!!

Day 2 of Keto and OY! I'm light-headed!! I had a massive pizza for lunch on Friday, so I started in earnest yesterday and I keep wondering to myself WHY AM I SO CRANKY!? Because I've had <50g of sugar and <60g of carbs for in the last two days. 

 

 

 

Actually, I'm thinking of going to In-n-Out and getting a protein style Double Double. Maybe. Probably not. . .

 

That does look super yummy, though. . .

 

 

 

I'm going to get my taxes done at 2. That's fun. Then I have an opening statement to write for tomorrow. And I MUST put my laundry up TONIGHT! Then I need to run. 

 

89 DAYS!!!

 

[Countess D'If]

I WANT A DOUGHNUT ALL THE DOUGHNUTS RIGHT NOW!!!

[Countess D'If]

I runned. I did not run well and I did not run for long. But I runned.

 

(P.S. while I should say that I ran, really was I did was runned.)

[Countess D'If]

88 DAYS!

Went for a morning runned. Today's data point - I can run (RUN, not jog or lope or saunter) for about 50 seconds before I loose the will to live. GOAL: run for 1 minute and 30 seconds.

 

 

READY GO!

[Countess D'If]

Apparently my body wants carbs at about 2 in the afternoon. . .

 

I would MURDER someone for a potato right now

[Countess D'If]

87 Days!

I've had to make an executive decision and NOT get my bar app in early. The upside is, I can BREATHE! The downside is, sending it in after the early application deadline costs flipping $500 MORE! WHYYYYYYYYYYY!?!?!?!?!?! 

 

I was not my best self this morning. I WAY overslept. So I did not runned. I'm going to spinning tonight and it's weights day 4.

 

IMA PUNCH THE REST OF THIS DAY RIGHT IN THE FACE!

[Countess D'If]

Jeebus help meeeeeee! There's a box of doughnuts RIGHT BEHIND ME!!!!!!!!!

 

[Countess D'If]

I did not eat the doughnuts. But I really wanted to!  (I still want to. . . )

 

I did eat 6 babybel cheeses. . . so it's a trade off. Fat wins and carbs do not. That sounds like a good trade to me. (That sounds like a bonkers statement but I'm doing Keto. Fat must win or this won't work)

 

I went to a spin class tonight. I was going to lift afterwards, but also fuck that. From now on, I'll lift BEFORE spin class.

 

Now I need to take a show because I smell SUPER bad!! But I donwanna!! 

 

But, I smell

[Countess D'If]

86 Days

This morning, I went completely bananagrams crazy and gave in and ate the doughnuts. 

[Countess D'If]

Man. Valentines Day and Keto DO NOT GO TOGETHER!!!

Image stolen and hotlinked from http://www.attackofthesugarmonster.com/

[Countess D'If]

i did day 4 of weight lifting, biceps curls, russian twists, barbell squats, calf lifts and leg presses. i did not runned

[Countess D'If]

84 Days

I'm in a horrible mood. I'm pissed off. Everything is awful. I'm trying to power through it because I get to have a girls' night tonight! Yay! But between now and there there is 5.5 hours of this JOB. Ugh this job. 

 

I fell off the wagon big time stylie last night. I'm annoyed at myself, but I'm going to get over it. 

 

This should be more substantive, but I am in such a foul mood. 

[Countess D'If]

Girls night out definitely made up for the poopoo kaka day. Wine, pasta, and OJ Simpson. Because, Las Vegas?

 

Also went and saw the 50 shades movie. Tried v hard to behave self. Self was not having it. Self would be really good at cinema sins. 

[Countess D'If]

Recovering from girls night out with a good ole fashioned introverts day

[Countess D'If]

82 days

Hangover, day 2. Some one kill me