Citizenkade Takes the Path Less Travelled!

[citizenkade]

How reflective and wise and caring towards yourself you are - that is a really great consciousness post! Also, congratulations on week three advances, although I have to say that you are pretty strict in your grading (too strict I think).

 

Thank you! I know I am a little strict! My wife thinks the same, but I know how I am. I tend to make allowances for negative behaviors! I'm becoming very aware of how I react to certain stimuli, and stress and I tend to love buffets. This week, though, I managed to steer clear all together, which is a big win with a Tibetan buffet 4 doors down from my restaurant!

[citizenkade]

CoC: Episode Two: Focus on Confrontation

 

I have always had a hard time pushing back. I can allow myself to be bullied, pushed around, kicked about, you name it. If someone is doing the same to someone else, I will do some truly frightening things to set things right. But if it's me? Let's just say I will almost always back down.

 

I've had a lot of opportunity to see myself pushed hard, in ways that were not fair, by a person who is much beloved and respected in my city. This man has been the catalyst behind everything we are going through with our restaurant, and I find myself just letting it happen. He's rich, powerful, and successful, so I know there isn't a damned thing I can do against him. Even if something came to legal action, he would still win, his lawyers are Rich Guy Lawyers.

 

Some would say I take the high road, some would say I need to fight back. I don't really know. Confrontation is something I will go to great lengths to avoid. I wish I knew how to stand up for myself against those that would do me harm. Don't get me wrong, most people and I exist very well together. But when someone really pushes, I tend to walk away. I'm really conflicted with this aspect of my personality. I am going to spend more time on this. I need to get more comfortable with the Why behind it!

[citizenkade]

CoC: Episode Two: Focus on Binging

 

The last few days have been rough, and I am really, really glad I started with the Rebellion two months ago. If I hadn't had made that step, I know I would be waking up with a sore stomach, and that we would be strained even more financially because I would be on an eating rampage.

 

Tonight, some friends took us out to dinner. I passed on the naan, because I knew I wouldn't stop if I had any. Bread is a trigger for binging with me. I've eaten whole loaves of bread with pasta, and that part of me can't come out. It's the Hulk to my Banner. Don't make me carby...

 

After we came home, I started looking through some of the things I need to sell to keep us afloat while we are finishing up the restaurant. I have always been a rampant collector. When my wife and I were dating some 20-odd years ago, I would miss the occasional rent payment just because I had to have the latest Star Trek action figure. That part of my behavior is better controlled, but I still buy "cool things" when I have a little extra money.

 

Something hit me hard while I was boxing up some miniatures I had sold. I don't just binge eat, I binge purchase, too. Here I am, boxing up some X-Wing minis that I am selling for quite a bit less than I paid for them. Tomorrow, I am doing even more. If I hadn't been a binge-purchaser, we wouldn't need to raise this money, because we would have already had it to begin with.

 

I'm really torn on this. I really enjoy collecting things, almost as much as I enjoy eating! I liked looking for these X-Wing miniatures, had fun finding them, and enjoyed a few games of it, too. But now, they're going elsewhere. I really did very little with these things that I paid several hundred dollars for. What was the point?

 

I don't think money is the answer to much in the way of happiness. I don't regret spending money. But I'm looking at a lot of these purchases in my life the same way tonight as I have been able to look at the way I had been eating. It's unnecessary. Destructive, even.

 

I think passing these things on to other people is going to be somewhat cathartic. I never thought of things like this quite the way I am right now. As of this moment, my possessions are going on a reduction plan, and my spending is going on a diet.

 

I'm kind of embarrassed that this never occurred to me sooner!

[WildColonialGrrl]

"It's the Hulk to my Banner. Don't make me carby..."

I love that!!

You have some great insights and articulate it really well. It always gives me pause for thought about my own habits. Thanks!

[citizenkade]

So happy that my ramblings and insights are any use to anyone other than me! Have a great day!

[Mangostrike]

I've been pushed around a lot in life too. Not so much since I got out of school, but back then it was like coworkers knew that they'd get a reaction out of me, and would make a point to target me. I've had people belch in my face when I wasn't looking, throw butter in my eyes, and make fun of me for actually doing my job. Each of these times I barely did anything, just let it happen, knowing full well that if it had happened to a friend I would have stepped in and done something.

 

I know that if I had acted in any way it would have just made the situation worse, and so I made the right choice, but those events still stick with me and I can't help but remember them with a combination of helplessness and anger.

 

You may not be able to control those situations, but you can analyze them to better understand yourself and how you can approach life in order to give yourself the best tools to deal with whatever might be coming. Sometimes the best you can do is put a negative situation behind you and use that knowledge to make damn sure your future is in your own hands, and that you're able to craft it the way you want and take ownership over your fate.

 

Don't know if any of that will help you, but it's something I've been thinking about for myself for a while.

[pumazealy]

DVDs. I am a binge buyer too and my biggest problem is with dvds. Twice in recent years I've had to do big culls because I needed money for traveling or bills. Got way less than I spent on them initially.

Difference I guess is I'd watch them a few times which if I'd rented them would cost more.

I've been more careful with buying them now. But I've been buying more toys.

Way I see it is buying this stuff is fun. It makes me happy. I could be spending the same amount or more on booze, smokes, gambling but I don't. To me that is the waste of money.

Toys you can always buy back when you have more money and if that's what you want to spend money on then do it. You enjoy the collecting and everyone who does has to sell some of it at some point.

[citizenkade]

CHALLENGE UPDATE: WEEK FOUR COMPLETION STATUS!

 

Level one feels so good! Let's rack up week three and see what was going on:

 

Goal One: Cardio

 

Needed 5 hours for an A, put in 7.5 hours total, not counting construction on the new building SCORE: A

 

Goal Two: Body Weight Exercise

 

Needed to work out three days during the week, adding intensity each day for an A. Made all three workouts, also added Cardio Sculpt workout to 5 out of 7 days, which uses a lot of weights and body weight workouts.                                                               SCORE: A

 

Goal Three: Nutrition

 

Kept processed food completely out of my diet.  No chips, bread, tortillas, you name it. Stayed away from naan bread at dinner Saturday night. I did have several drinks, one of which had the first sugar I've had in nearly 2 months. It was worth it!                   SCORE: B

 

Life Quest

 

Did a lot of drawing, but I'm not grading this one. Too much work on the new place!

 

Side Quest:

Not home most of the week due to construction, not grading this one!                                        

 

Good week overall, can't wait for the construction to be over and get opened up again so I can really kick these workouts in the teeth!

[Stonie]

Your workouts must nearly be out of teeth at the rate you're going! Keep it up!

[citizenkade]

CHALLENGE UPDATE: WEEK FIVE COMPLETION STATUS!

 

Started the week with a nasty cold, so I'm really happy with the results! I wasn't on my feet until Thursday, but managed to get all my workouts in from Thursday to Sunday!

 

Goal One: Cardio

 

Needed 5 hours for an A, put in 4 hours total. Sick the first three days of the week, but I worked hard the last 4! SCORE: B

 

Goal Two: Body Weight Exercise

 

Needed to work out three days during the week, adding intensity each day for an A. Made all three workouts, threw in a fourth set on Thursday, "failure" sets on Friday, and my normal workout on Sunday. Also added daily Planksanity workouts, so I earned that damned A!   SCORE: A

 

Goal Three: Nutrition

 

Kept processed food completely out of my diet.  No chips, bread, tortillas, you name it. Easy to avoid junk food when we're flat out of money, but a friend took us to lunch and I managed to not eat the whole restaurant!                                                                                             SCORE: A

 

Life Quest

 

Lots of drawing and miniature painting, pretty happy with this week!                                                                       SCORE: A

 

Side Quest:

Not home most of the week due to construction, not grading this one!                                      

[Stonie]

Soo many A's! Good job on cramming in all your workouts, being sick sucks ballz. Yeah, with a z, it's that bad. 

[citizenkade]

Most things with a "z" are that bad! Thank you!

[Mangostrike]

Looking forward to seeing some of your miniatures. I just bit the bullet and bought some Citadel paints to start work on my Tyranid Model. Thought about using the artist acrylics (Reeves) I already had, but I don't think they'll work well.

Life goal for my next challenge will be less consuming and more creating.

Good job on bouncing back after being sick!

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[citizenkade]

CHALLENGE UPDATE: WEEK SIX COMPLETION STATUS! CHALLENGE COMPLETE!!!

 

The end of my first ever Nerd Fitness challenge! It's amazing what you learn about yourself doing one of these. I have never in my life worked so hard on anything to my own benefit like this.

 

Goal One: Cardio

 

Needed 5 hours for an A, put in 6 hours total. Today was my favorite, got hit by a hail storm on my walk, it was like an elemental send-off for this Challenge! SCORE: A

 

Goal Two: Body Weight Exercise

 

Needed to work out three days during the week, adding intensity each day for an A. Made all three workouts, added extra intensity and also tricep kick-backs. Today I did two sets of two pullups, and while they weren't pretty, I freaking did them!

SCORE: A

 

Goal Three: Nutrition

 

I did have some sugar the other day, my first in a very long time. My partner has the barrista section set up in the restaurant, and when you have new equipment in your business, you really want to try it out, right? Wade made my wife and I some amazing Vegan Lattes, I decided this was an occasion that warranted an exception.

SCORE: B

 

Life Quest

 

Lots of drawing and miniature painting, pretty happy with this week!                                                                       SCORE: A

 

Side Quest:

Not home most of the week due to construction, not grading this one!     

 

WEIGHT: 252 pounds. Down 21 pounds since Thanksgiving, 10 pounds during this 6 week challenge! I wasn't really focusing on weight loss, just getting healthy, so this is an unexpected plus!

 

Overall, very happy with this challenge. I was beating myself up for not pushing the workouts harder, but I have to recognize that I have been putting in really long days building the new restaurant pretty much since the beginning of December, so I'm going to allow myself some pride.                                

[Tommy Khaos]

You kicked that challenge's ass! Now to size up the next challenge for its ass-kicking!

[citizenkade]

Thanks, Tommy! The next one is mapped out, and after two "trial days" of it, I can honestly say it's going to kick my ass!

[Liberator]

Awesome job! You did a great job getting things done and you are seeing the results for all your work!  You are on fire! Looking forward to your next challenge. 

[citizenkade]

Thanks, Liberator! Finishing this felt amazing!