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Sambalina Tries to Recover


Sambalina

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Damn it! Here I am doing yet another 'Sam's recovering from a break-up' challenge. This one has hit me hard, and I'm not sure I can go it alone this time around. So, this challenge is focused on trying to get back to 'me' and less on my lifting numbers or healthy eating. Any eating at all is welcome at this point in the break-up process. It's bad, folks. Not so bad that I've lost hope, and I do know I will get through it, but I am sick of this happening to me and not having any control over it. So, the plan for this six week challenge is:

 

Main goal: Don't become depressed. I was diagnosed with depression once about 6 five years ago, and while my doctor and I were able to treat it med-free, I am truly terrified of ever going back to that place, emotionally. So much so that I'm beginning to suspect I suppress some negative emotions that i should be dealing with out of a fear of it spiraling out of control and becoming full-on depression. Given my living situation so far from home, with a limited (though I suspect not as limited as I think) support network, I am too afraid to really get down and dirty with m bad emotions. So, in the interest of becoming more awesome in the long run, I'd like to try and fix this, and not fear depression. The three ways I'm going to achieve this:

1) Find a therapist and go.

I've found somewhere that looks good online, so I will be making an appointment next week. I've never done anything like this before, but I am really tired of being at the whim of these mostly unreasonable and seemingly unnecessary emotions. It's not just this one isolated event, but I'd like to learn some more effective coping strategies for the things in life that really have a disproportionate effect on my happiness, such as disappointments, dating, and so on.

 

2) Walk at least 30 minutes a day. I've found that if I'm moving, I can't feel the pain. I no longer feel ill or want to cry. If I stop moving, it comes back. So, for at least 30 minutes a day I will be calm and anxiety-free by walking around my town.

 

3) Lift gently at least twice a week. I will not be aiming to increase any of my weighs, just to get those endorphins flowing and keep me in the habit of lifting. I am going to add on a little cardio to get my heart-rate up, because doctors have recommended this to me in the past as a way of improving low mood.

 

Life goal*: Complete my 5 week swing dance class.

This is something I really want to do, but it's tough to motivate myself to leave the house and try new things right now. I am committed to this, though. I've paid for the whole thing upfront, and am just going to be a robot. I don't have a choice, I have to go to dance class.

 

*My life goal was going to involve my mini-dream of opening a little online bakery and craft store, which I am still pursuing. However, I felt I needed a smaller and more manageable goal for now. Perhaps in a couple of weeks, once I have a handle on this thing, I can upgrade my life goal. 

 

I'm not sure how much I will get around checking everyone's challenges to begin with. I do care about you guys, and will do my best, but if all I have the willpower for is getting out of bed and showering, then that's what I've got to go with.

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Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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I'm glad to see you back.  I'm sorry you are having a rough time...but I am happy to see you ajust to push through.  If you ever need an ear to bend or shoulder to scream at feel free to use me, all my extra padding makes for good emotional outpour absorbing!!

“It’s the sensible, logical thing to do, of course, which is why we don’t do it.” -Tanis, Dragons of Autumn Twilight

"Hope is the denial of reality. It is the carrot dangled before the draft horse to keep him plodding along in a vain attempt to reach it." - Raistlin - Dragons of Autumn Twilight

Current Challenge

 

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I love you, Sammy! You give me a shout whenever you want ok?! I'm actually a certified grief counsellor, so I can lend an ear whenever you need.

Hugs xx

Sent with awesomeness from my iPad using Tapatalk

Half Faerie (Sidhe) Scout | Black Belt Kitchen Ninja
"A positive attitude will not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort" - Herm Albright
You're welcome to skype me (audriwolf) too but let me know who you are

My challenge

 

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Hey Sam, will be keeping an eye on you.

 

It's tough. I've been though the ringer too in the past and when I've been overseas too, during these times it's hard to see an end to it, but you are right, it will come and you will feel better. I know it might seem corny but a mate that went through a divorce recommended a book a called "who moved my cheese" to me and it really helped when I split from my ex. Give it a go if you haven't read it before.

 

The best advice I got when I split from a long term partner was to find what you enjoy doing and do as much of it as possible.

 

Take care of yourself and know that we are here for you if you need us xx

         Endor, LVL 45 Half-Elf Ranger 

PR and Motivation Log | Current Battle Log 

      

                    Feb-March 2022 Challenge

   

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Thank you, guys, you're all such a huge support to me. I'm not at the end of my rope or anything, but am certainly a long way from 'normal' Sam. I've taken some big steps forward this weekend though, and I'm really happy about my decision to see a therapist. I'm in the process of getting an appointment for late next week.

 

Mitch Dee - I think the world needs more 'tackle hug enthusiasts' :D

 

Blaidd - you're a certified grief counsellor? Does your awesomeness know no bounds? Thank you for your offer - if I get in a bad way (though I'm hoping that sudden panic-attack bit is over now), I will keep you in mind. Thank you so much.

 

Dom - It is hard to see an end, but I do know it's there... somewhere! I haven't read that book, but I'll look it up now :) And that's good advice, I am hoping the swing dancing, baking, and crafting will do this for me.

 

Right now though, I'm off to church, of all places. My good friend Bekah (who's been through some truly, truly awful stuff and has been super fantastic to me) invited me for a day out on the Air Force Base. I'm mostly going because we're going to Chillis for lunch (you can only get that on-base and 'normal' folks can't get in), but I'm sure the service will be nice and relaxing if nothing else.

 

Thank you again guys, you all rock my socks.

Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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Ok, first day of the challenge! I called the therapy place this morning and have an appointment for Friday. Korean health insurance doesn't cover mental health, so I'm not sure how often I'm going to be able to comfortably afford to go - I don't want to swap relationship anxiety for financial anxiety :s

 

I had a busy and fun weekend, and am feeling better right now. Huge improvement on this time last week. I have a really busy week ahead - I have to give two teacher training presentations tomorrow (and finish their PPTs today), have some training myself Tuesday and Wednesday, Social walking meet-up Weds night, go to immigration to renew my visa on Thursday, Swing Dance Thursday, first ever therapy session on Friday, Amy's 'I've got a new job' party all day/night Saturday, and then a coffee date Sunday afternoon. I'm not sure about whether I should be dating yet, and don't really feel like it, but he's a dentist, and I find talking to medical professionals outside of their work totally fascinating, so let's just call it a 'research date' :)

 

So, step one in my recovery plan: Make therapy appointment = complete.

Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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sorry for the struggles, but (unfortunately) that's the way we usually grow.  And the whole Korea thing explains why it's already Monday there...

Warriors don't count reps and sets. They count tons.

My psychologist weighs 45 pounds, has an iron soul and sits on the end of a bar

Tally Sheet for 2019

Encouragement for older members: Chronologically Blessed Group;

Encouragement for newbie lifters: When we were weaker

 

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hey Sam,

great to see you doing the thing you're doing the best  - kicking some serious ass :D is that sounds inappropriate? I hope not :)

 

you know, at first when I saw your title I was like: "Dammmnnn, she stole my title!" But then my idea has changed about 17 times so no harm done :D

 

and honestly - going to therapist is so courageous - hopefully she/he will help you get 100% back on track :)

 

subbed, see u around :)

Elf Druid - Level 8         looking around for happiness || tracking || #intro || #old


 


"Most people think they’ll feel good once they reach some goal. By linking happiness to something you don’t have yet, you denying yourself the power to create it in the moment. Your happiness is your birth right. It shouldn’t depend on you ACHIEVING something. Start by claiming it and using it to make your journey fun all the way and not just at the end." S.Chandler


 


"Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy" G. Apollinaire

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Hey Sam!!  Sorry to hear things are rough.  Breaking up is brutal, but I applaud you for taking the time you need AND the strategies you need to get better instead of allowing it to eat away at you.  Good for you, facing up to the tough stuff.  You're going to come out on the other side a stronger, more confident, you.  Just remember that there is an end to the tunnel, and take things a minute at a time if you need to.

Hiraedd the Twice Risen:

Hamadryad; Pilgrim

battle log

 

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hey Sam, it's been quite here, I hope everything is alright?

Elf Druid - Level 8         looking around for happiness || tracking || #intro || #old


 


"Most people think they’ll feel good once they reach some goal. By linking happiness to something you don’t have yet, you denying yourself the power to create it in the moment. Your happiness is your birth right. It shouldn’t depend on you ACHIEVING something. Start by claiming it and using it to make your journey fun all the way and not just at the end." S.Chandler


 


"Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy" G. Apollinaire

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Hey guys! Yes, everything is fine - I'm just coming down with a cold :( But, I feel like I had a really strong first week. I am feeling much better, but still pretty messed up. My first session with the therapist was really good, and she was able to see some patterns in my thinking that I hadn't noticed before, so I'm hoping to be able to work through some things with her and fix up a few thought patterns that are maybe doing more harm than good. I've decided to go once every two weeks for now.

 

I went to dance class and had a blast. If I'm not too sick I'm going to go social dancing on Wednesday evening. I've also signed up to learn to rock climb! On a real mountain! So, if nothing else, this breakup recovery period is making me a more active an interesting person. And I wasn't exactly boring before, so... :D

 

I had my coffee date with the dentist this afternoon. I wasn't exactly that engaged because my throat was pretty sore and I wanted to fall asleep... but I'm not sure I'd bother to see him again. I was reading some news on my phone when he arrived at our meeting place and to get my attention, instead of saying 'hello', he clapped his hands in front of my face (um, rude?!). The date produced some excellent conversation lines such as "Many people think I like to visit Thailand because I'm sexually dysfunctional, but I'm not", and "don't worry, I'm not a communist". :D Lol, good times.

 

I hope to get around to all your threads this week. Work starts back on Tuesday so I will have some free time trapped at my desk in which to do it :)

Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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Oh my you are definetely even more active than you were before :D 

I mean rock climbing on the real mountain? === AWESOME !!

 

The dentist sounds like a douchebag - just sayin :D

Elf Druid - Level 8         looking around for happiness || tracking || #intro || #old


 


"Most people think they’ll feel good once they reach some goal. By linking happiness to something you don’t have yet, you denying yourself the power to create it in the moment. Your happiness is your birth right. It shouldn’t depend on you ACHIEVING something. Start by claiming it and using it to make your journey fun all the way and not just at the end." S.Chandler


 


"Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy" G. Apollinaire

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hahahaha, sometimes people just go for an extreme personality on a first date in order to see if the other person can handle weird.  Honestly the guy either did that or he was really a douche.  Oh well, you live and learn!

 

Glad to hear the first week went well. Sorry to hear you're ill.

Half Faerie (Sidhe) Scout | Black Belt Kitchen Ninja
"A positive attitude will not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort" - Herm Albright
You're welcome to skype me (audriwolf) too but let me know who you are

My challenge

 

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Well, whether he was trying to see if I can handle it, or if that's just him - I'm not interested either way!

I'm a bit disappointed this morning as I wanted to go to the gym, but I had hot and cold chills all night and got only about 3 hours sleep even after I took some cold pills, so I figured it was better to rest. The sooner I get over this cold, the sooner I can start getting stronger. Well, physically. I feel like I'm getting stronger mentally all the time. I am feeling so, so much emotionally better and I'm really looking forward to the progress I can make mentally with the help of my therapist. I have a lot to look forward to in the next month or two, and that is really helping me keep my spirits up.

 

Thank you for all the encouragement guys, you all rock :)

Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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Thank you so much, Hira.

Yesterday was a bit tough. I'm not even sure why. Nothing new has happened or developed, I just had a bad day, emotionally. I almost burst into tears at lunch when I couldn't decide what to eat, and I spent the whole day anxious, worried, and brooding. I made it to dance class in the evening, and we were working on something I found REALLY difficult. I didn't find it as enjoyable as usual because I couldn't get the hang of it, but I'll keep practising. On the bright side, I didn't think about ANYTHING other than moving my body in the right way for about two hours. The mental relief of that 'time off' is immense. I'm going hiking with a group tomorrow (first hike of the year!) and I'm hoping it will bring similar relief.

Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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Exercise is such a great relief from stress, distracting your mind with something physical to focus on allows you to rest that worry part of your mind. I get the same thing from playing squash so I know what you mean. 

 

I think you're doing all the right things Sam, hang in there it will get better. 

         Endor, LVL 45 Half-Elf Ranger 

PR and Motivation Log | Current Battle Log 

      

                    Feb-March 2022 Challenge

   

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Thanks, Dom :) It is getting better all the time - today I feel almost totally normal! Well, normal for me  :panda:

Hiking yesterday was awesome. The mountain was beautiful, the hike not too difficult, and a really neat little bunch of people. And really multi-cultural! Three Korean guys, a Jamaican girl, and Iranian couple, and me (a Kiwi). Two years ago all you'd meet were North Americans, but things have changed so quickly. I spent part of the day joking and flirting with one of the cute Korean guys, and it felt great! Just to know that I can do that, I'm still attractive and fun, quite a boost :) I mean, I *know* those things, but after a breakup, you take a bit of a confidence hit whether you realise it or not.

 

Today I'm off on a walking tour of Seoul. It's actually snowing a bit though... and it's supposed to be spring! I'd better wrap up warm.

As far as goals go, I'm doing well. I've been to all my dance classes so far, been walking every day, and am so far totally avoiding slipping into any kind of depressive state. 

 

:pirate:

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Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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This sounds really awesome, Sam! Sounds like you've already accomplished the title of your challenge! The hiking (and flirting!) sounds fun, and I hope you enjoyed your snow walk, too.

Human Ranger, Level 10
Long-term Goal: Hike WA section of Pacific Crest Trail, August 2014

Current Challenge | Facebook (personal & locavore) | Blog | Twitter

"You stand at the verge, and you could become anything." - Dan Chaon

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Hey-yo, Nerds! The walking tour was heaps of fun - no one to flirt with, but met some nice people and had some Korean food I'd not had before. Phew, did I ever get my walking done over the weekend, though! Such sore calf muscles from all the stairs on the hike!

 

I wanted to get to the gym this morning, but I had an upset tummy. I didn't fancy trying to dead lift in that state. I may go this evening, and if not, tomorrow morning for sure.

 

So I got kind of a major hair style change yesterday - totally by accident. What I got was not even close to what I asked for, but I kind of love it now. It was not going to be this short, or this bleached... but that's what the crazy Korean lady did. I'm gonna rock it anyway :)

 

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So, second therapy session tomorrow, will get the gym in, and I'm looking at a productive week.

I've also almost got the first three recipes for my bakey sorted. I'm hoping to go live next week. Eek!

  • Like 1

Warrior Princess
Eating Psychology Coach

Adventure's Guild Challenge winner: Challenge #24

â•‘ Live the Whole  â•‘ Bucket List â•‘Level up my Lifeâ•‘ 

"Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive is a special occasion."

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