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Zenaxavoir

Nax completes the pre-reqs.

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The 27th...that was Sunday right? I, ehh...would have been a good example of what NOT to do x_x Seriously, I was doing good all day at not having wine, and then mom comes up and says something like "I'm having white wine, but the box of red wine is still in the entryway and there's a bit left in it, in case you want to finish it. It will clear some space if you do, too..." and that's when things went to hell. Ugh, this wouldn't be so hard if alcohol wasn't all around me all the time. Yesterday (Mon 28th) was alcohol-free, though.

 

For Saturday, Sunday, and Monday I think the only goal I passed was the coffee one. Oh, and cooler shower (Monday). Of course I brushed and flossed, but not right before bed x_x

 

Saturday: picking 44, water 5, sleep pass.

Sunday: picking N/A (probably over 50), water 3, sleep fail

Monday: picking 25, water 5, sleep fail

 

Eh, at least I stayed hydrated more than I was before the challenge started.

 

Sleeping has gone to shit in the last two days because, well...I don't even know. I'll have to start going to the gym at 6 AM soon (because I need to be at work by 8:15) so that means I'll have to be in bed at 10:30 for 6 hours of sleep...but if I want to eventually sleep for 7 or 8 hours it means I'll have to be in bed by 8:30? 8:30 is when I usually get done all the crap I have to do and start to play video games :\ Ugh. There needs to be more hours in a day.

 

BBL, late for gym. I'm still signed up for 6:30 this week, though, so it's going to be a mad rush between gym and work.

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1.1, Lumosity: pass
1.2, sleep:

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 14
1.3.2, water: 4 so far, probably fail -_-
1.3.3, sober: pass
1.3.4, nails: pass
1.3.5, brush/floss:
1.3.6, colder shower: N/A
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: nope
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass

 

Absolutely exhausted. Work day was actually 8:15 to 4:15. I was told that this isn't too common, but...yeah. Right after deadlifts and squats in the early morning. And then walking around for 3 hours while helping to invigilate an exam.

 

BED TIIIIIME. Brushing and flossing is like a monumental burst of effort right now lol.

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Thanks. I wish I felt amazing right now though lol. I want tequila, but in order to obtain tequila I'd have to get up, therefore nope.

 

Wednesday (April 30):

1.1, Lumosity: pass
1.2, sleep: fail

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 12
1.3.2, water: 4
1.3.3, sober: pass
1.3.4, nails: fail
1.3.5, brush/floss: fail
1.3.6, colder shower: N/A
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass

 

 

Thursday (May 1st):

 

1.1, Lumosity: pass
1.2, sleep:

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 2 so far. Yes, two.
1.3.2, water: 4 so far
1.3.3, sober: pass
1.3.4, nails:
1.3.5, brush/floss:
1.3.6, colder shower:
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa:
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass

 

This is more exhausting than grad school. I was told that it would be 5 hours per day, or 25 hours per week since I'm only part-time. So far it's been 8+ hour days every time, and the more I talk to my co-workers, the more I realize that this happens often. So here I am, more tired than usual, and...I'm supposed to finish my thesis? Shit, work time is even cutting into my evening gym time. I'll probably have to talk to the GM, because this can't go on.

 

The hotel is undergoing renovations right now, so there's all of that to deal with on top of doing all the rooms in a regular manner. The next floors to be renovated will have to be dealt with during the peak season, too, so what's that going to be? 12 hour days? No way in hell.

 

I still have a bunch of crap to do, like laundry and shit. Not only do I not feel like it, but by the time I get everything done, it'll be bed time and I will have had zero free time. Again. How do normal people deal with this? Or maybe this is my free time right now and I'm just wasting it all by staring off into space like a zombie.

 

Eh. I better go play Lumosity before I just give up and go to bed. Although that would require getting up, too.

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May 2nd and 3rd scores will be posted later. They weren't stellar, mainly since I fell back into the old habits after a few days off.

 

Yesterday's scores (sunday May 4th):

 

1.1, Lumosity: fail
1.2, sleep: fail

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 24ish
1.3.2, water: 0
1.3.3, sober: fail
1.3.4, nails: fail
1.3.5, brush/floss: fail
1.3.6, colder shower: N/A
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: fail

 

New job yay: on days where I have to work, the face-picking is greatly reduced.

New job nay: I never have time to drink water while at work.

 

There's this thing I do where I tell myself that I'll do all these productive things during the day, and then just end up staring at the Internet and doing nothing all day. It happens every time.

 

Oh well. Weekday now. Back to sober-land!

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This thing where you tell yourself you do productive things, but not doing anything useful in the end... Sounds very familiar. Do you work with to-do-lists? Do you work with a timer? I think I have suggested these things before, to work with a to-do-list so you can cross off the things you've already done (also silly small things) and to work with a timer, so you'll do productive things for an hour or so and then have an hour of doing silly stuff on the interwebz. Like watching lolcats! 

 

confused-lolcat.jpg

 

Okay, so that was your lolcat for today. xD Nah, you need to take about an hour to watch things. Lolcats, youtube videos, NerdFitness posts, more lolcats and maybe some Tumblr too. And after that hour, you go and do productive things again for an hour. It's only an hour. And seriously, put the stupidest things on your to-do-list. I put things like "wash hair" and "take pills" on my to-do-list. I put every single thing of homework on there, like "draw pictures for essay" and "write a log" and "read website for Cambridge". Just simply reading it, not even doing anything with it yet, is a chore for me, so I put it on the list. Keep it simple. The more things you can cross off, the better you'll feel. 

 

And believe me, in no-time you'll be done with your chores and you have the rest of the day to slack off and do only silly things. You'll feel great and satisfied, while still having time for yourself. I bet you'll get a face like this:

 

smilingcat1.jpg

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I did a to-do list today for the thesis shit (that I was supposed to be taking a break from) but haven't accomplished any of them yet. They're not things that can be done in a few minutes, though, so I'll do them when things calm down at work. Well, okay, some of the things could probably be done easily, but I suck at writing.

 

I've tried the timer method before, but I just sort of stare into space while I'm supposed to be productive -_- I'll think "Come on, brain! Do your stuff!" and brain will be all like "LOL NOPE :D" I've been drinking less alcohol, less coffee, and more water. I mean come on, brain, this feels like a very one-sided relationship.

 

Last time I did things, I had to do the whole 20-second berzerker mode thing over and over again, for epic quests such as "open the word document" and "fetch the reference paper from the pile over there." The thing is, though, I did accomplish other things today like going to the gym, cleaning up my desk, going to yoga class (!!!), doing the paperwork to renew my firearms license (includes getting photo taken), eating healthy, and most of the things on my quest list. I even went to financial services to ask them to extend my student status, and got my ID card updated. Also went to the bank and paid tuition. So...it's just the goddamned thesis I can't do apparently lol.

 

Goals today so far (March 5th):

 

1.1, Lumosity: Done
1.2, sleep:

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 27 (I was on campus today, can you tell?)
1.3.2, water: pass (6)
1.3.3, sober: pass
1.3.4, nails: pass...mostly. I cleaned them but was too lazy to cut/trim them and they're kind of long.
1.3.5, brush/floss:
1.3.6, colder shower: pass
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass (3)

 

I thought the quinoa quest would be easy, but it's just demoralizing when I know that any quinoa I cook will be out of my control as soon as it comes off the pot. Aaahh, the joys of living at home. Maybe I can make a double batch next time or something. If I get told "DON'T EAT IT, I NEED IT FOR A RECIPE!" then I might see red a little.

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When I talked about that to-do-list I meant you could put anything on there. All those things you named that you did... Did you put those things on the list? They are chores too! And after every single one of them you could cross them off the list. But since it doesn't sound you did that, let me do it for you. xD

 

Nax's To-Do-List

- Go to the gym

- Go to yoga class

- Clean up desk

- Get photo taken for firearms license

- Get paperwork done for firearms license

- Ask financial services about student status

- Get ID card updated

- Pay tuition

- Eat healthy

- Rawr at today's challenge

- Write next paragraph thesis

 

So you see... You've done so much. And no, you didn't work on your thesis. You were going to take a break anyway. Just look at that nicely crossed to-do-list! Can you now see you can be proud of yourself? :) You're doing great, you just need to look at it differently, because now the only thing you'd see as useful (or so it seems to me) is working on your thesis, while there are thousands of other useful things, like all these things you did today. So be proud of yourself. n_n

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Nax's To-Do-List

- Go to the gym

- Go to yoga class

- Clean up desk

- Get photo taken for firearms license

- Get paperwork done for firearms license

- Ask financial services about student status

- Get ID card updated

- Pay tuition

- Eat healthy

- Rawr at today's challenge

- Write next paragraph thesis

 

Oh...yeah, it does look more mind-blowing when written that way o_o All I had done in terms of list was to make one for the thesis only.

 

Today is a work day, so...maybe I can write "go to work" on my list? lol (Supposedly the hours are going to be more sane now, too. Thank goodness, because I was not having a break with last week's hours. Well, maybe a break from financial insecurity, but you know.)

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Yes, "go to work" would be a great one for your list! Write it down. It's something you have to do that day and when you come back home you'll get that pen and cross it off your list with a big fat line. :D Silly things like that make your list longer and the more you can cross off, the better you'll feel. To-do-lists aren't only for homework stuff. Things you have to take care of or household chores are also great for a to-do-list. I even put "put garbage outside" as a thing on my list, while it is done within 2 minutes. Crossing it off makes me feel so much better, while I know it was a chore that isn't very hard or special in any way, but it needs to be done. 

 

Great to hear you will have better working hours this week. It was a quick start you had, it gave you some extra money and now you're ready to have normal hours and normal wages again too. :) Hopefully the working hours will stay stable.

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I forget what yesterday's scores were. Or if I posted the ones from the day before. I'm pretty sure the ones for May 6th got lost because I forgot to save the .txt file with my scores in it and then the computer got windowsupdate'd overnight.

 

Yesterday (May 7th):

 

1.1, Lumosity: fail
1.2, sleep: fail

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 8
1.3.2, water: pass (6)
1.3.3, sober: pass
1.3.4, nails: fail
1.3.5, brush/floss: pass
1.3.6, colder shower: N/A
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass (3)

 

I'm sleeping less than 5h per night again. Gym, get home, need to do adult things like have supper and clean laundry, and then it's either free time or sleep. And then I think about things and I can't sleep so I go to the computer hoping to distract myself, but I continue to think of crappy things anyway and then cry and then it just gets worse.

 

And yesterday I got an email from my supervisor asking for all I had on my thesis, and I haven't even worked on it for like 2 weeks lol. I'm so fucked and everything sucks. I should just quit and then get evicted. And move to another city and just start my life anew or something. Or become a hobo.

 

Ugh, that wonderful feeling where you know that your potential can take you to the stars, and yet all you can do is fall face-first in the mud that's directly in front of you, over and over and over again.

 

Aaand I'm late for work. I don't even have time for NF anymore and this sucks ass from a straw. THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY BREAK. WHY IS IT WORSE? WHY DOES EVERYTHING ALWAYS GET WORSE?

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Ohdear, sounds like you're having a hard time. And I can totally understand. It's a horrible feeling when you feel you're able to do the most amazing things and all that happens is that everything seems to go wrong... I can totally relate to this feeling. But seriously, don't plan on becoming a hobo. I'm sure you will manage to not become a hobo. I wish I could do anything for you, but there's nothing I can help you with right now, apart from being there for you and listening to what you have to say. Or write, in this case. 

 

I thought you talked to your supervisor and that he/she granted you 2 weeks for a break, because you had such a hard time. I think it is wise to have a serious conversation with your supervisor about your mental wellbeing right now and that you're really having difficulties getting round with everything. Ask them for help, see if they have solutions or ideas that might work for you. Find some way to be productive while not burdening yourself too much. And I know this is hard, but you're not alone. There's the whole of NF to come with ideas and I am sure there are plenty of people in your direct surroundings that are willing to help you one way or another too. 

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That's the thing. I did talk to him about the break, hence why the email caught me completely off guard. I sent a long reply and...haven't gotten anything back, which is making me even more anxious. I hope I get something before Saturday, because I'll be out of town then, and I don't want to be worrying about this shit while I'm trying to relax.

 

Scores today (May 8) so far:

 

1.1, Lumosity: pass
1.2, sleep: fail

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 7
1.3.2, water: pass (6 so far)
1.3.3, sober: pass...so far. TEQUILA TEMPTATION D:
1.3.4, nails: fail
1.3.5, brush/floss: pass
1.3.6, colder shower: N/A
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass (3)

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That's the thing. I did talk to him about the break, hence why the email caught me completely off guard. I sent a long reply and...haven't gotten anything back, which is making me even more anxious. I hope I get something before Saturday, because I'll be out of town then, and I don't want to be worrying about this shit while I'm trying to relax.

Ohdear.... Yes, I understand. It's a very strange action of him. I also hope he'll reply soon. In the mean time, try to find ways to release your stress a bit, okay? That one time I tried yoga, I noticed I got really relaxed and that I kind of felt peaceful in my head for once. You could have a go at it, maybe?

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"I am a slow walker, but I never walk back"

 

Things take time and they take patience.  You've got this Nax.  Going the hobo route isn't all it's cracked up to be.  Stand strong and remember, we're here cheering you on every baby step of the way.  You've got this.

 

tumblr_m7accqKYrR1r1rbwco1_500.gif

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I forget what yesterday's scores were. Or if I posted the ones from the day before. I'm pretty sure the ones for May 6th got lost because I forgot to save the .txt file with my scores in it and then the computer got windowsupdate'd overnight.

 

Yesterday (May 7th):

 

1.1, Lumosity: fail

1.2, sleep: fail

 

Vanity goals:

1.3.1, picking: 8

1.3.2, water: pass (6)

1.3.3, sober: pass

1.3.4, nails: fail

1.3.5, brush/floss: pass

1.3.6, colder shower: N/A

1.3.7, relax face: N/A

1.3.8, quinoa: fail

1.3.9, wear retainer: fail

1.3.10, less coffee: pass (3)

 

I'm sleeping less than 5h per night again. Gym, get home, need to do adult things like have supper and clean laundry, and then it's either free time or sleep. And then I think about things and I can't sleep so I go to the computer hoping to distract myself, but I continue to think of crappy things anyway and then cry and then it just gets worse.

 

And yesterday I got an email from my supervisor asking for all I had on my thesis, and I haven't even worked on it for like 2 weeks lol. I'm so fucked and everything sucks. I should just quit and then get evicted. And move to another city and just start my life anew or something. Or become a hobo.

 

Ugh, that wonderful feeling where you know that your potential can take you to the stars, and yet all you can do is fall face-first in the mud that's directly in front of you, over and over and over again.

 

Aaand I'm late for work. I don't even have time for NF anymore and this sucks ass from a straw. THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY BREAK. WHY IS IT WORSE? WHY DOES EVERYTHING ALWAYS GET WORSE?

 

Have you read the Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy?

If so, you remember the quote "DON'T PANIC".

 

I agree with the others, you've got this. I believe in you and I think that it will work out with your supervisor.

 

But, do resist the tequila!!!

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Oh, and if you ever plan to become a hobo, can I cast you in a film about hobo-life? xD *giggle*

 

"See here, Nax's cardboard box. I wonder where all these Loki drawings came from..."

"Here is Nax, finding food in a trashcan... Wh-what? Where did that full bottle of wine come from?"

"As you can see, hobo life is dangerous. Fortunately Nax has a self-made weapon. Not entirely surprising, it's a staff based on Loki's staff from Avengers."

 

Something like this? :P

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Going to lump scores for Friday, Saturday and Sunday into the same list because laziness.

 

1.1, Lumosity: fail
1.2, sleep: fail Friday (9th) and Sunday (11th), pass Saturday (10th)

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 3 Friday, 19 Saturday, 25ish Sunday
1.3.2, water: fail all
1.3.3, sober: fail all
1.3.4, nails: fail on Friday and Saturday, done on Sunday
1.3.5, brush/floss: fail all except Sunday
1.3.6, colder shower: pass Friday, N/A Saturday and Sunday
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: fail all

 

Went to my friend's camp over the weekend and had the day off today. Aaaahh, weekends, how you derail me. Next weekend? East Coast Comic Expo a few towns over. Hotel has been booked. Roommates confirmed. This is going to be great, but so, so bad for the challenge lol.

 

I've been slacking a bit when it comes to going to BodyAttack class too, which makes me sad. Either I get off work too late, or I'm too damn exhausted to go after both morning gym and running around all day at work. I pulled one of my quads several weeks ago too, which blows. It's nothing major, but every time it feels all right again I re-pull it pretty much instantly. Ffffffuuuuuuu!!!1 I'll probably go for a run later or something because I feel like a fatass right now. I'm pretty sure that running won't aggravate it. AND IT'S ACTUALLY SUNNY OUTSIDE, LIEK OMG.

 

Right, got a pile of costume-related things to do for the Comic Expo still. Panic time? Almost! At least I got the hotel room booking out of the way.

 

Will take pics of scepter once it's complete XD It wasn't quite to my liking last time. And yes, if I ever become a hobo, I'll use it to threaten people. Most likely police, then I can get arrested and have food and shelter in jail lol!

 

I did resist the tequila on Thursday :)

 

Got an email back from supervisor, too. All is good. I should probably reply back...after I go running!

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Yesterday (Tuesday, 13th):

 

1.1, Lumosity: fail
1.2, sleep: fail

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 14
1.3.2, water: fail (1)
1.3.3, sober: fail
1.3.4, nails: fail
1.3.5, brush/floss: fail
1.3.6, colder shower: N/A I had one recently but forget on which day it was. Monday evening I think?
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass...I think. I don't even remember.

 

Today so far (14th):

 

1.1, Lumosity:
1.2, sleep:

 

Vanity goals:
1.3.1, picking: 3
1.3.2, water: 1
1.3.3, sober: fail
1.3.4, nails:
1.3.5, brush/floss:
1.3.6, colder shower: N/A
1.3.7, relax face: N/A
1.3.8, quinoa: fail
1.3.9, wear retainer: fail
1.3.10, less coffee: pass

 

Only a few days before the Comic Expo, and everything costume and prop-related is going to shit. I should have known, because this is how it always fucking goes. I started working on things long before the last minute, and now nothing has worked out (the mask I was making for one of my friends collapsed onto itself and is useless now, and some of the things I need to do on my own costume are not working, and fail fail fail FAIL FAIL. Now I won't even have enough fucking time to get half the things I wanted to do, done. And this is the reason why I was putting off most of my challenge items, and for what. again, effort and preparedness results in nothing save for frustration, disappointment, and yet another tearful meltdown with lots of yelling and shaky hands.

 

And I still need to dye my hair, and I have no free time tomorrow evening either. LOOKS LIKE I'M GOING TO SLEEP EVEN LESS :D And drink more, because apparently alcohol is the only thing that makes my hands stop shaking when I'm extremely stressed. And here I thought "I know, I'll give myself an easy challenge just so I can get some momentum and then hopefully do a real challenge!" but apparently I'm not even capable of playing life on easy mode. Great. Very optimism. Much future!

 

Trying to find some positives, ehh...tomorrow is payday? People at work seem to like me so far?

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Go juggle.  It always relaxes me.  Find a way to laugh this off, Nax.  Getting upset about it isn't going to help.  Take a deep breath and realize that you kick ass.  A lot of times, I get so focused on a project (or two, or three...) and it seems like it should be a cake walk.  Then I realize that I'm too confident in my abilities and haven't been taking care of myself along the way.  This is usually when I start breaking pieces of glass (not on purpose, that gets expensive) and I have to take a moment to breathe.  Some of it becomes salvageable, but more often than not, I make an adjustment and move on.  Drink less, focus on your costume and get your butt in gear.  You've got this.  We're here cheering you on.

 

Pay day is always good.  How could people not like you?  

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Aaaand I'm back. I'm pretty sure I failed every challenge item since Thursday, save for getting enough sleep on Saturday night. I also lost track of face-picking counts, but they were under 20 each time. I should probably feel bad about this, but for some reason I don't, because EAST COAST COMIC EXPO WAS AMAZEBALLS!

 

Since I'm lazy, I'll just copypasta the post I made on the FaceBook event page:

 

"ECCE was amazing!

 

This was my first "real" con (the time where I showed up incredibly late at EnBiCon because I can't read doesn't count lol) and now I'm addicted. Everything and everyone was great...save for my bank account. The panels I got to attend were amazeballs. Thanks a bunch to the ECCE organizers for putting on the event, and also thanks to everyone in attendance for being awesome. This probably sounds narcissistic and silly, but having so many people asking for pics and generally being "whoaaaa!" was mind-blowing, and I did not expect that at all. Truth be told, I was actually a little embarassed to be cosplaying at first since my overactive imaginaton and obsession with fictional characters is what got me bullied and humiliated throughout middle school and high school, Not to mention how some family members and close friends constantly tell me I'm wasting my time when I work and/or spend on anything cosplay-related. After ECCE? I was at the restaurant, in cosplay, in public, and not giving a fuck. Thank you, for showing me that it's society that has a problem, not me X)

 

Winning first in the costume contest's assembled category also made me go all fangirly inside. The gift certificate at Comic Hunter (and more) has already been spent! I hope to be able to make my own cosplays in the future, but in the meantime, I'll keep wearing dat Loki costume, which was drafted and sewn by Sara at Sara Nycole Couture #shamelessplug

 

Looking forward to ECCE 2015!

 

http://i.imgur.com/8qaqc0n.jpg"

 

There were a few things on my costume that I wanted to do, that did not get done, but all the important things (re-gluing armor scales mostly -_-) were finished on time. If 2:30 AM can be considered on time anyway lol. The ageing detail/paint on the scepter? Done at 2:30 also, in a hotel room, the night before the event.

 

tumblr_n5aaw9rDnw1r3iauco1_500.png

 

 

 How could people not like you?  

 

I don't know. I tend to assume the worse just because of all the middle/high school fuckery. I don't know how important those years are in terms of long-lasting emotional and social development, but being the weird/crazy kid that everyone made fun of for 6 consecutive years probably had a lasting impression. I know it's not true now, but sometimes the "feeling" takes a while to catch up to the "knowing" x_x

 

I was getting stopped for pics every 5 to 10 mins at the con. It was just...whoa lol. I managed to collect piles of said pics from FaceBook, so I figured I should probably post a few on here XD They're under a spoiler cut because I don't want to make this post stretch longer than longcat.

 

 

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ERMAHGERD the icecream you're eating in the picture! IT'S THE DUTCH FLAAAAG! WHY ARE YOU EATING MY FLAG! :'D

 

Anyway, it sounds like you had an awesome time! Congratulations on becoming first in the cosplay competition. That's really cool. Hurray! I'm sure your Loki-self had a good time too, being squee'ed at by fans. Haha! And I simply love that picture with mini-hulk having beaten you. It's just waaaaay too cute and it's awesome that you played along. Kudos to you!

 

Also, I just wanted to say a thing or two about you failing this challenge. Because you're not failing this challenge. May I just tell you that you're horribly wrong when you say you failed this challenge, because I think you have learned a lot about yourself and about how to do certain things. You've learned a lot of things that DON'T work for you, so you can remember you shouldn't try that anymore and start trying NEW things. This challenge has been very educational for you, you have definitely picked up new knowledge which you can use in later challenges. So don't tell me you failed this challenge, or else I'll make an angry silly face. Actually, that's not really handy to say, because I have this feeling you'll tell me you failed this challenge on purpose, just to see my face like that. >.> But you get my point, right?

 

As for the bullying, I feel you there. I've been bullied for 8 years straight in primary school, just so it could continue for 4 more years in high school, to end up in ignoring me for the last 2 years of high school. Since pre-puberty, puberty and adolescence are very important times in your life in the development of both body and mind, it can be incredibly hard to really believe that people like you for who you are when you've been bullied for all that time. But it's not impossible. There are always people who like you for who you are, there are always a few goofballs that like the same stuff that you do (like most people here on NF) and I am sure there are many many people who enjoy being your friend. I certainly enjoy the contact we have.

 

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Just remember that there will always be people who are there for you and who would love to be your friend. You've seen there are many people who don't think you're weird at that comic con, simply because everyone there is accepting and weird themselves. Haha! Let's just all be weird together. The more souls, the funner it'll be. So Nax, don't give up on yourself. Don't give up on people (to like you for who you are), don't give up on life (because you are going to rock, I know it) and don't give up on improving yourself, because you are a very strong person and I am very very sure you will find your way.

 

Now here are some hippie flowers, to cheer you up. (And as you're reading this, smile as wide as you can. It'll lower your stress and make you feel happier. Even if it's a fake smile.)

 

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The only thing I could hope to add to Haku's post is that even the fake smiles, when done enough, become real.  

 

Other than that, your costume looks amazing, the pics are wonderful (the kid-Hulk and the ice cream are my favorites) and you rock.  Plain and simple.  Kick week 6 squarely in the behind.  You got this.

 

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