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Blaidd

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Thank you Blaidd for all of your hard work! You made this challenge awesome!

CoderGatherer

Fire Genasi - Level 5

STR 9 | WIS 6 | CON 8 | CHA 3 | DEX 6 | INT 6

 

Current Challenge

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 -Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6

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Battle Log

 

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face." - Eleanor Roosevelt

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"If your true happiness and identity lies in being close to a monk or ranger, why wouldn't you pursue it no matter what?" 

 

This is a good question, and a fair one. I figure it deserves an answer. Your post made me think even harder about things I was already thinking hard about, so I apologize in advance if this answering post turns out to be longer than would seem warranted by such a simple-seeming query :)

 

I think perhaps the tone of my post came off as wistful or negative, and that's not really what I'm feeling -- that was a failure on my part to communicate effectively -- but my thinking on this is still a bit muddled and complex, so I'll give myself a break :)

 

Peter McWilliams (in one or another of his '90s-era self-help books) said something that has stuck with me for a long time: "You can have anything you want -- but you can't have everything you want." We have to choose what it is we really want. This is the root of the conflict I described in my post; because of a fairly life-altering choice I've made to pursue a graduate degree, several other choices that are also very close to my heart have had to be set aside for the present.

 

As much as I would love to return to training, it wouldn't be fair to myself, my teachers, or my training partners. As an example of the travel craziness in my life, I'll be home seven of the next fourteen days (in two- or three-day increments). Then, mid-November (just about the start time of the next challenge, ugh), I'll get on an airplane to Europe for a four-week trip, during which I have to write three papers and from which I will go directly to visit my sister and her family for Christmas in upstate New York, and then from which I'll fly directly to my school in California for another intensive residential program starting on 2 Jan. There is no way I could legitimately participate in any sort of martial arts classes right now. I could never commit to structured, progressive training or teaching when week to week I don't even know what city I'll be in on any given day.

 

Since both my military background and my prior experience have made me very sensitive to people claiming to be things they're not, I'm really not comfortable signing up on an internet forum to say "I'm a monk!" If I don't train, I'm not a martial artist. I might have been before, and I might be again someday, but just as a writer is someone who writes, a martial artist is someone who trains and fights -- and if I don't, I'm not. Not now. (Please do not interpret this in any way as criticism of others who decide to join the monks for other reasons; this is purely my own story and what I'm comfortable with. Other people have different stories and different ideas, and they are completely entitled to their own interpretations of what it means to be a monk or ranger or whatever.)

 

Don't force yourself to be something you won't truly enjoy, life is too short.

 

I heartily agree with this statement! But, although I may not enjoy every minute or every unpleasant second- or third-order effect of this graduate school experience I've chosen, overall I'm having fun. I just have to make different choices in other areas of my life for a while.

 

I just feel very strongly that people should do what really fulfills them. 

 

Again, I agree. But -- we can have anything we want but not everything -- I'm prioritizing school over training right now, and my post was a somewhat inept attempt to explain what that would mean for me, for the next challenge. I'm new to NF and still feeling my way through the guilds and what they all mean. I had a very good experience in my first challenge, and I want very much want to participate in the next one despite my crazy travel schedule, so choosing to do bodyweight/mobility stuff with the assassins (which I can do anywhere and requires commitment only to myself) seemed a better option than wistfully joining the monks or rangers and laying claim to something in which I know I will not be able to truly participate.

 

Truly challenge yourself if you want your life to change! 

 

I don't think there's any better advice out there! I know I'm making excuses instead of making it happen on the NF front -- but I'm making other things happen right now, things that I've decided are more important, so I guess I'll have to accept the excuses for now. There's a lot of change in my life at the moment. I certainly hope it's for the good. Time will tell, I suppose.

 

Thank you for taking time to share your rant! I appreciate the way you nudged me to clarify what I've stated publicly, so that I can be satisfied I've thought my way completely through things. Just one more example of what a wonderful community this is :)

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hröa Periano, sanar Eldaro, fëa Núnatano

(body of a Hobbit, mind of an Elf, soul of a Dúnadan)

Memories of a former Age [ 1 |  2 ]  ~  Return from Mandos [ respawn ]

Recent sojourns in Middle-earth [ 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 ]

[ Current: Misty Mountains ]   ~   [ Tracking spreadsheet ]   ~   [ Instagram ]   ~   [ Books ]  

The warrior and the artist live by the same code of necessity, which dictates that the battle must be fought anew every day.  ~ Steven Pressfield, The War of Art

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This is a good question, and a fair one. I figure it deserves an answer. Your post made me think even harder about things I was already thinking hard about, so I apologize in advance if this answering post turns out to be longer than would seem warranted by such a simple-seeming query :)

 

 

Long, but worth the thought. Thank you for sharing this. I'm kind of on the other side, identifying based more on "dream me". I am not yet at all an outdoorswoman, but that ideal inspires me - the woman who can trek through life like through dense forest, and overcome difficulties like mountains and trees. I am learning to be my ideal self, and while I couldn't really bear a mantle like "Ranger" (how many of us everyday urban dwelling/office working schlubs can compete with Aragorn, et al?), I identify as a Ranger for the same reason I name myself after Pippi Longstocking, and the same reason I RPG - to inspire myself through fantasy to greater real heights in my life.

 

I understand about "taking mantles not earned", though. I feel that the "inspired by rpg classes" element makes it less a question of deluding self or others. Either way, well said. 

 

I look forward to seeing you around, amberdisa!

  • Like 2

Tzippi Longstockings, level 9 Ranger/Monk 

Battle Log - My Fitness Pal - Quest to Find My Epic Quest - Challenges:   #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7,

The Westerosi Fitness Tour: Dorne Stormlands Vale the Reach Westerlands The Wall 

MamaBear Kiss Off Waterbending Rounding <<Current

 

 

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I'm kind of on the other side, identifying based more on "dream me". I am not yet at all an outdoorswoman, but that ideal inspires me - the woman who can trek through life like through dense forest, and overcome difficulties like mountains and trees. I am learning to be my ideal self

 

Yes. This is why it was such a hard decision, and why my agonized prose came out sounding a bit whiny and wistful. Alexandrite rightfully called me out on it, though, and now you're illuminating the rest of the discussion I had with myself. You can all get out of my head now :)

 

You're absolutely right -- we should identify with what we want to be, because we become what we think about. Only a little while ago I would have scoffed at describing myself as a doctoral student, but, well, here I am...

 

I couldn't really bear a mantle like "Ranger" (how many of us everyday urban dwelling/office working schlubs can compete with Aragorn, et al?)

 

WORD. I do try. Goodness knows every summer I try, and I always come home awed by the power of the wild and painfully aware of my own insignificance. The truth is, we can't compete. But we can use those examples like the North Star -- we don't expect to actually reach it, but we can use its guidance to steer us unerringly to our goals.

 

I identify as a Ranger for the same reason I name myself after Pippi Longstocking, and the same reason I RPG - to inspire myself through fantasy to greater real heights in my life.

 

This kind of identification is so powerful! You will go far knowing this. Like I said, deep in my heart... But, since circumstances (which I have chosen!) prevent me from fully participating in such identification, I'm going to try on another one for the next challenge, and see where it takes me. I'm looking at it as branching out -- what new things I can learn, while still fulfilling my current chosen academic goals? Heinlein was right: specialization is for insects.

 

Thank you for your thoughts! I'm also looking forward to seeing your awesome Ranger self around, and I might join you in the wilderness someday :)

  • Like 2

hröa Periano, sanar Eldaro, fëa Núnatano

(body of a Hobbit, mind of an Elf, soul of a Dúnadan)

Memories of a former Age [ 1 |  2 ]  ~  Return from Mandos [ respawn ]

Recent sojourns in Middle-earth [ 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 ]

[ Current: Misty Mountains ]   ~   [ Tracking spreadsheet ]   ~   [ Instagram ]   ~   [ Books ]  

The warrior and the artist live by the same code of necessity, which dictates that the battle must be fought anew every day.  ~ Steven Pressfield, The War of Art

Link to post

Thank you for taking the time to flesh things out. I know it can be so difficult to really express ourselves over the internet without verbal tone and body language for context. I just wanted to encourage you to stick to who you are and have fun. My husband went through graduate school and I am currently not willing to put myself through such a crazy gauntlet! You definitely have my respect for being so focused.

I hope to see you in two weeks on the next challenge forums!

  • Like 2

Brain-Building Assassin, a.k.a Radical Domestic Jill-of-All-Trades

Battle Log | Challenges: Current |18 |17 |16 |15 |14 |13 |12 |11 |109 | 87 | 65432 | 1  

Isaiah 40:30-31

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