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kaelvan

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I notice getting more bendy with my back.

 

Was able to geek out with this girl this evening about travel (went on about Holi festival folklores), which was nice. That gave me spring in my step about online dating (I was starting to get tired over it and wanting to quit).

 

Decided to just completely outline all the backstories of everything in my webcomic. I been having ridiculously hard time actually writing anything for that. Instead I been writing ridiculous stuff, like Batman Robin fanfic (still have no clue how that happened).

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

Pretty sure I have horrible luck with having women drop off the face of the earth. Oh well *sigh*

 

Now know how much I owe for my ticket. Wasn't the worst, it only less than $200. I was expecting way much worst. Now need to see how much I have in my bank, so I can finally get my hair cut (hair's attacking again).

 

Think of maybe being wild and crazy and just tell my parents I'm lesbian this week. Just want to get it over with.

 

Now just waiting for the guy to call and finish bit more of the process for working with the farm animals. Oh yeah this weekend, I finally got to see the place. Love it there. They have a sheep the jumps through hoops and a pig that plays the piano. Oh and emus (let's hope don't have to go to war with them like the Australians did).

  • Like 1

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

It is my opinion that sometimes the worst part about these though things you want to do is just not knowing what to expect of them. Once the outcome of an event is out of your control, it's easier to accept because you've exerted control over the parts that you can and are only waiting to see how things play out. 

 

Coming out to your folks is a BIG deal, and it might take them some time to digest (especially for your ma, from what I've read of her on your threads), but your sexuality is integral part of who you are and its not likely going to change from one day to the next so why should you keep it secret? not like there's anything wrong with you liking girls (I like em too, and I don't see anyone complaining. We can all agree they are the best, right?). If this will take them time to process, might as well get the processing started soon. It will also get you inner peace, and the knowledge that you are true to yourself, both of which are much too valuable not to strive for. You should not feel the need to hide who you are, more so to the people close to you and the ones you love.

 

If you decide to take the step this week just know --for what it's worth-- I support you 100% and if more than that were possible, I'd be backing you up for that. If you decide you want to wait, because this is too crazy scary (or you don't feel ready or whatever other reason), I also support you 100%+  Despite what I've written, only you can decide what you want out of your life, and every decision forges who you are, so there is no right or wrong here.

 

I send you good vibes all the way from the Yucatan peninsula in Mexico and lots of love too.

 

(not that it compares, but whenever I've had one of these potentially-earthshaking events nearing I always entertain myself coming up with the most outrageous possible ways I could do things e.g. If I'm resigning at a job I imagine all possible ways of quitting in the most public, flashy, dramatic way.  Reality seldom compares and if you do this enough, reality will be a bit plain by contrast and not as scary. Who knows? it might end up in a very anti-climatic way e.g. "oh... you're lesbian? yeah... we figured that some time ago".)

  • Like 3

"Unfocused" Wizard // Rationalist of the order of Bayes

Lvl 5 Assassin. Lvl 33 Jack of all trades. 7 STR|6 DEX|7 STA|7 CON|16 WIS|8 CHA

Current challenge Wizard in the making: ero san's continuing road of magic

My drawings Sketchbook, Other afiliations The Loft

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I have to prepare for the worst (it's just habit I picked up). I want to do it Saturday; though if I find good opportunity tomorrow, I'm taking it.

 

Got covered in head to toe in peanut butter making the shelter dogs' treats. Great way to not want to look at peanut butter for quit a bit.

 

Had really long and great workout today. I got pinwheel down. And my back been getting more flexible.

 

Also, I think I did 2 pushups today. Couldn't really tell since my glasses were off (not breaking these too).

 

Also, talked to an old friend who I haven't spoken to in 2 yrs. Still feel bit bad I made her suffer from my issues at the time even though she forgive me. Maybe next challenge make amends with the people I basically hurt during my darker days.

  • Like 2

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

Also, talked to an old friend who I haven't spoken to in 2 yrs. Still feel bit bad I made her suffer from my issues at the time even though she forgive me. Maybe next challenge make amends with the people I basically hurt during my darker days.

THIS. This Is all of my feels right now. I'm going through some of my own bad relationship back story and trying to decided if I should talk to them again and try to find...(I'm not sure what closure? piece?), but its been almost 2 years and I don't know if it would be better to just leave old wounds alone :/ Its comforting to know that other people go through the same struggles. Really great idea for the next challenge I may have to steal it :) 

  • Like 1

Half-Elf: Ranger/Assassin

Challenges: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6a] [6b] [7] [8] [8.5] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [ --> Battle Log]

Old Battle Logs [2017] New Battle Log 2018: Reforged

DragonForging My Life: Epic Quests [Google D] Epic Quests [NF]

Lifter Profile [Symmetric Strength] Racer Profile [Athlinks] Body Comp [G-Sheet] Running Stats [G-Sheet]

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THIS. This Is all of my feels right now. I'm going through some of my own bad relationship back story and trying to decided if I should talk to them again and try to find...(I'm not sure what closure? piece?), but its been almost 2 years and I don't know if it would be better to just leave old wounds alone :/ Its comforting to know that other people go through the same struggles. Really great idea for the next challenge I may have to steal it :)

If you do, we can both struggle through and conquer it together.

  • Like 1

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

And I chickened out when I heard my dad refer to the dead gay activist in House of Cards as a fag. Thanks dad for making me feel really uncomfortable. I couldn't even tell him off. I feel like such a loser for that. I feel like a disgrace to my own morals. *sigh*

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

Could it be better if you talk to them separately? I know that would mean having to go through the whole ordeal twice, unless by talking to your mother she can break the news to your dad... and then you don't go for a cold start... and you don't get the full force of the initial reaction?

"Unfocused" Wizard // Rationalist of the order of Bayes

Lvl 5 Assassin. Lvl 33 Jack of all trades. 7 STR|6 DEX|7 STA|7 CON|16 WIS|8 CHA

Current challenge Wizard in the making: ero san's continuing road of magic

My drawings Sketchbook, Other afiliations The Loft

Link to post

I know my mom be little more easier to talk to her about it. She always joke it's twice the wardrobe.

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

I think I'll push it off until the end of holidays. We apparently are going to be "celebrating" Easter with my mom's side of the family (little backstory these people basically stop talking to my mom because she defended my aunt, who has been helping my grandparents, but because she said no more on being "abused" by them, she got isolated by mom's side of the family. Only reason we are going is our aunt asked us to do that since she's moving). I have no clue if my jackass cousin will start in about gay people, but I might tell him off. I will try to stay enough under the radar for my mom since she can't drink (recovering from her co-depending on alcohol to get through dealing with her family). I might tell my grandma (dad's mom) about being lesbian since she's the ultra-liberal that walks the walk and she's the few family member that don't suck.

 

Also, working on my anxiety since I'm now getting off my meds in 2 weeks. I need to do this in order to gain control in my life. Also, to get over my fear of going and socializing with people.

  • Like 2

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

Sounds like a good plan. Good luck!

  • Like 1

Half-Elf: Ranger/Assassin

Challenges: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6a] [6b] [7] [8] [8.5] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [ --> Battle Log]

Old Battle Logs [2017] New Battle Log 2018: Reforged

DragonForging My Life: Epic Quests [Google D] Epic Quests [NF]

Lifter Profile [Symmetric Strength] Racer Profile [Athlinks] Body Comp [G-Sheet] Running Stats [G-Sheet]

Link to post

Thanks.

 

Today I went on a pretty dangerous road (since trying get over my fear of driving...fun how that was instilled by my mom) because NY state hates roads and paving is for squares (but put rocks on mud is the way to go). I had such an adrenaline rush I haven't had in a while.

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

Part of me feels like I failed a bit on this challenge, especially the part for volunteering as much as I wanted (oh the joy of it constantly deciding it wants to snow or rain...next time I won't chose the outdoors with the dogs). 

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.†

~Paulo Coelho

 

I'm a level 3 moon elf, who's an druid assassin.

 

My Inspiration

Tumblr, which helps me stay the course for art challenge

FB, which I guess we could be friend :tongue:

My challenge

Instagram

 

Link to post

And I chickened out when I heard my dad refer to the dead gay activist in House of Cards as a fag. Thanks dad for making me feel really uncomfortable. I couldn't even tell him off. I feel like such a loser for that. I feel like a disgrace to my own morals. *sigh*

 

Aww, it can be veeery hard to speak up, especially when its your own family.

 

It sounds pretty daunting but, you are their daughter. Sometimes it can be very different when they are judging *other people* but when it is their own son or daughter it can open up their minds more. Ideally, hopefully, it will go that way.

 

My own parents used to be super judgemental. Anyone who was different was a 'freak', gay people were 'fags' etc. Now they have a daughter (me!) who is pierced and tattooed, metalhead goth with green hair, exactly the type of person they used to call a 'freak', and who has gay friends. Well, they have shifted a LOT in their attitudes, from trying to push me into conventional clothing (ie 'I'll buy you clothes but they can't be black!') to accepting me as I am, and being more accepting to others who are less conventional as well! Hell, my Mum let me put purple streaks in her hair.

 

Hopefully, hopefully, fingers crossed, you will talk to your parents, or even just your Mum as you said, and then it will be done and you will be able to take a deep breath in relief that it is finally done, and everything will be fine. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best. It may be hard, and it may take time for them to accept.

 

All the best for the rest of your challenge.

BellaDonna the level 3 Nymph Assassin

STR 5|DEX 6|CON 8|STA 4|WIS 4|CHA 4

Origin Story, First, Second, Third Challenge

BellaDonna's Battle Log

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