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Teros - XV - The Purge


Teros

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-My mom put 5 whole tomatoes in a crockpot and left it alone for 3 days; expecting pasta sauce.

 

-My mom cooked a jar of gravy in the microwave and it exploded/shattered glass everywhere.

 

-My mom did not try pizza until she was 25.  She did not try pesto until I gave her some 3 days ago....(she's in her mid-60's).  "What are pine nuts?"

 

-My mom thinks that every single food that I have her try has garlic in it, and automatically hates it because it has garlic in it.  The times she assumes there is garlic- there isn't.  The times that I put garlic in my food, she likes it and I don't tell her.

 

-Just like garlic, my mom assumes that every single food that I have is 'spicy'.  The same reverse food strategy applies like garlic.  When I put buffalo sauce in food, she likes it.

 

-My mom has salt and pepper for 'spices' and that's it.  She does not understand what curry is.  Her logic of all food: Italian food = garlic. Mexican food = spicy. Asian food=garlic and/or spicy.  Every other type of cuisine= does not know what it is, but it has garlic or is spicy.

 

-Recipe Book for my mom:

1) Meatloaf = ground beef + egg + plain breadcrumbs + salt/pepper

2) Stew = carrots + potatoes + celery + beef chunks + Lipton Beefy Onion soup + salt/pepper

3) Meatballs = jar of Ragu sauce + ground beef + egg + plain breadcrumbs + salt/pepper

4) Shepard's Pie = ground beef + Lipton Beefy Onion Soup + mixed vegetables + mashed potatoes + salt/pepper

5) Baked fish = piece of fish + plain breadcumbs

6) Chicken = Bake a whole chicken

7) Tuna fish = packet of tuna fish + mayo + celery

 

No, I didn't forget anything.  Unless you want me to put 'cereal + milk', 'bread+luncheon meat', or 'pilsbury muffin mix' ect as viable options here...

 

Thankfully, my sister is a bit more adventurous; but not compared to what I've made/tried.

 

Good grief, maybe your mom and my mom were mind-melded in some sort of temporal flux back in the 60s. My mom, rest her soul, never met food she couldn't make taste like cardboard. Or cardboard with salt.

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I was 19 before I knew that "cheese" didn't mean "Velveeta."

Now imagine being offered "cheesecake."

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&Heidi
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I was 19 before I knew that "cheese" didn't mean "Velveeta."

Now imagine being offered "cheesecake."

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*Vomits a little*

 

No, no, it's cool. I'll be okay.

 

*Vomits a little more*

 

I know other people like that though. I think the only time I ever ate velveeta was at my grandmother's, because she's a terrible cook (my dad's mom). It was some velveeta/salsa dip she microwaved...

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I know other people like that though. I think the only time I ever ate velveeta was at my grandmother's, because she's a terrible cook (my dad's mom). It was some velveeta/salsa dip she microwaved...

 

That reminds me of a co-worker of mine. I'm a cheese lover and bring in different kinds to work etc... and this co-worker was going on about not realizing there so many different kinds of cheese out there. I come back with: "There are more kinds of cheese out there than cheddar and mozzarella you know" and he replies: "You mean like marble cheese?" 

 

Facepalm!

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I grew up eating Velveeta, but it was only used to make certain casseroles or Mexican cheese dip. I've pretty much stopped buying it, though I did buy some of the Mexican kind a bit ago just to make some creamy dip (was feeling lazy). 

 

My mom is a pretty good cook. One of the ladies who helps her out in the church kitchen (who owns a catering business on the side) says that my mom could win Chopped. She just knows what goes together and can come up with stuff on the spot. Still working on that. 

 

No...my husband used powered sugar instead of flour, and tried to cook them in the oven, but of course they were too runny to even work. He said they tasted nasty. But, in his defense, he's the one who cooks our steaks. He can cook steak better than I can.

 

I'm also a bit fussy about onions, but I'm slowly getting better. Love the flavor they add, but it's a texture thing or something. And raw onions make me gag to the point of spitting everything out.  :offended:

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I grew up with Velveeta as the cheese on grilled cheese. First time my gramma made them with cheddar I tried to figure out what was wrong with them!

We did use Velveeta for the 4 qt pot of Mac and cheese we made for the whole family, and we taught the kids to eat broccoli and cauliflower by putting Velveeta on them.

We all have milk intolerance. ..hmmm.

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On the velveeta discussion- that was one of the few foods that I ate as a kid.  Velveeta Shells & Cheese, Campbells chicken noodle soup(although I hated the chicken bits in it- very stringy and gross when I was a wee Teros), and pudding. Lord, do I love chocolate pudding.

 

 

I'm also a bit fussy about onions, but I'm slowly getting better. Love the flavor they add, but it's a texture thing or something. And raw onions make me gag to the point of spitting everything out.  :offended:

 

I was really picky about everything until a couple of years ago.  I understand what you mean with onions in terms of texture. I have the exact same problem with celery to this day.  Something about the stringy/stalkyness is totally gross and I hate it.  I used to be the same about onions like you.  However, once I sucked it up and had a sandwich that had some thin slices of red onion and horseradish sauce, I realized it wasn't too bad.  Then I ended up making a turkey salad that had flaked turkey, diced grape tomatoes, raw red onion minced, minced garlic, and mayo and I realized that raw red onions aren't too bad.

 

I also have a serious issue with vinegar.  Yes, this means I don't eat pickles.  One time I went to a sandwich shop and I told the guy what I wanted. NO PICKLES. NONE.  What does he do?  I wasn't paying attention when he was making the sandwich (since I've ordered this before without an issue).  I get home and bite into the sandwich.  He ran out of lettuce so he used JUST pickles.

 

 

 

 

You think I ate that?

 

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You think I even TRIED to eat that?

i-threw-it-on-the-ground-3-o.gif
 
I, in all seriousness, debated going back to the sandwich place and doing this in the store.
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He ran out of lettuce so he used JUST pickles.

 

Pickles, lettuce ... they're both green, right? Maybe he couldn't tell them apart. I knew a guy who wouldn't eat anything green. Pickles, green beans, lime jello, spinach - if it was green, he wouldn't eat it.

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A friend of mine mistook tapioca pudding for mayonnaise once. To be fair, why was there pudding sitting along with the condiments?

 

 

My Dad told me that Tapioca was made out of fish eyes... Ah.... fathers!

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I ask for UNSWEET tea everywhere...and taking a swig of sweet tea, expecting no sugar makes me want to spew it out all over, except the all over is usually my car, and I went through drive thru because I was on my way TO somewhere!

I even ask them as they hand it to me, and still get sweet tea!

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In His hands and Under His wings, Phil 4:13; Is 40:31; Jer 29:11
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 lime jello - if it was green, he wouldn't eat it.

 

A friend of mine mistook tapioca pudding for mayonnaise once. To be fair, why was there pudding sitting along with the condiments?

And what was made out of it?  Tapioca on a sandwich might be good.

 

My Dad told me that Tapioca was made out of fish eyes... Ah.... fathers!

I heard the exact same thing though I don't remember who would tell me that. It's a shame because I like tapioca now.  And rice pudding.

 

I even ask them as they hand it to me, and still get sweet tea!

 

If asking them face to face, I think that someone else made it so they just assume that it's whatever you were asking for.  If it was talking over the drive-through speaker; there's more chance of a screw up. Someone once thought I wanted 8 banana smoothies.  I wasn't aware that I was picking up an order for an ape convention.

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Tapioca is a king of cassava flour. Well, Tapioca is the name of a food, it is like a pancake with a weird texture, that I don't like. There are many kinds of cassava flour, some are toasted, some not. But the best thing you can do with cassava flour (not tapioca) is Farofa. My mom made one toasted in the butter, with eggs, bacon and kale that is one of her especialties, very taste!

I have a italian heritage, cook is part of who we are, and everyone cook, women, men, children. The first thing that I learned how to make was cake, than rice, eggs, all kinds of salad (clean and chop things), grilled chicken. Than I went to college and my horizon expanded.

 

Teros you can learn how to cook, it isn't that difficult, look llok up for some online course or video. Maybe a book?

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Clarys inspired me. ..my daughter Wufkar inspired me. ...and then, enjoying my own cooking inspired me! And teros inspired me to embrace paleo for so many reasons.

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*Vomits a little*

No, no, it's cool. I'll be okay.

*Vomits a little more*

...

I know! I had the same response when some cheesecake at eight or nine. Never touched the stuff until my 20s, when I taught myself how to cook real food.

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I cannot decide which is more gross.  Velveta (which I ate as a kid too) or swapping pickles for lettuce (and I like pickles a lot - but c'mon, that is wrong).

 

Teros, you bring me the hard questions!

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Rauros to Mount Doom 470 miles this leg for a total of 1779 miles 

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So may1st is my b-day.  It's almost midnight so by the time I finish writing, it might not be my b-day anymore.

 

I went and had crepes with my family.  Went to this place:

 

http://www.theduckandbunny.com/

 

 

And I tried a ton of things. Every single item was impressive.  It labels itself as a 'snuggery'.  That's a real word.  I split a bunch of crepes and tried the following:

 

-The Wyatt-Reuben: smoked turkey, mozzarella, spinach, and cranberry coulis.

 

-The Distinguished Lincoln: Black forest ham, gruyere, and caramel mustard.

 

-The T.S. Geller: Prime roast beef, cheddar, caramelized onions, tomato, mesculun greens, homemade horseradish cream.

 

-Ultimate New York System: Four wieners, homemade meat sauce, chopped onion, yellow mustard, celery salt.

 

-P.B. and B: Peanut butter, banana, honey, Portuguese sweet bread *Full Elvis Version* also add bacon, fried egg, and fluff.

 

-Bacon-wrapped dates with honey balsamic glaze

 

-Truffled pomme frites: handmade fries with truffle oil and Atwell's gold (I think it was a cheese)

 

-Salted caramel cupcake

rsz_img_1215-cc3adbd4.jpeg?ver=141569185

 

-Strawberry cream cupcake

 

-Nutella banana cupcake

 

-Honey lavender cupcake

 

--------------

 

Remember, I didn't eat a whole one of any of these. All of this stuff was split between people.  Some things I only had a bite of. Other things I had almost half of.

 

Every single thing was f!#king amazing.  I'd say that the best thing overall was the Wyatt-Reuben.  Close second was the Distinguished Lincoln.  Bray would be happy.

 

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It's 9:30 here, so it's still your birthday. ...

Happy burfday bro! I wuv you!

Now...you and me...enough celebrating. ..(ate 1/2 of two danish treats today).

Of course the reuban was amazing....because, well they are good when crappy, so, when at a real place, amazing! So happy for you! Salted caramel cupcake....ok, I'm going to stop now! One of my desserts I split was crepes, I'll say it was in your honor! Cheers! To you!

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Happy birthday you bastard.

 

And bacon wrapped dates are amazing. A restaurant near me does them stuffed with cheese, called Devils on Horseback... I need to get around to trying to make them myself.

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Birthday menu looked great! It is so much fun to order and,share! That way you get to try lots of stuff.

At my house you get a birthday weekend to do fun stuff so have a great birthday weekend!

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Happy Birthday Teros, sorry it is belated.  That menu looks amazing.  I am not sure what looks best, but I would have put a hurtin' on it.

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Cathelas the Level 3 Half-Orc

STR 10|DEX 6|CON 10|STA 11|WIS 8|CHA 7

My Challenges: 15-1 15-2 15-3

Tracking Goal, get weight below 200 pounds Starting (Jan 23, 2015): 226 Goal: 199  Exactly 3 months to hit goal weight April 23, 2015!

 

New Weight Loss Goal 180 pounds started April 23, 2015  Current Weight 179 - Made it on June 27!

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Travel to Mordor by Spin, Road Bike, Running (starting Feb 23, 2015)         Made it to Mount Doom on July 11, 2015!  Now, I need to turn around and go home!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

Rauros to Mount Doom 470 miles this leg for a total of 1779 miles 

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