kaelvan Let's pretend last challenge never happened...

[kaelvan]

Yeah my last challenge started to fall apart after being taken off meds during the last few weeks. Now I seem to be much better now (getting quit use to it now).

 

 

Art

 

1) So past few days now started a challenge for myself of drawing an art piece a day for a year (today be day 10) and putting it on all my social media. I gave myself minor guidelines; use circus arts and some use of geekness. I like to make sure that keeps up. No missing days (not even when sick...though I don't have to worry too much on quality if sick...atleast drew something). Must be posted by midnight.

 

2) Must join an art competition (no matter how small or big just do it).

 

3) Network with other artists.

 

4) Finish that program I have to help with getting started with freelancing.

 

5) Make a schedule. And keep it up.

 

Fitness

 

1) Run atleast once a week.

(Thanks Capt).

 

2) Use Charity Mile everyday.

 

3) Work on making my back even more flexible.

 

Fear

 

1) Start take ownership of my life (and that I'm the only one keeping myself unhappy).

 

2) Learn to put my foot down for once because my family getting pretty bad now about walking allover me (even my younger brother did this to me a few times) and at work (so much drama over that).

 

3) Have a backup plan if things go south.

 

4) Do something that really scares me...have so many of them. (Bonus if I work through other fears)

 

Bonus Points

• Apologize to people I hurt over the years (from my depression).
• Get a new job to replace current.
• Keep off depression meds without a problem
• Get under the skin of that one coworker and ruin her rule over the day crew

 

As usual using my made up unicorn peso system...don't ask me how it works. I still don't know it works. It's like the currency of string theory.

 

Rewards

One fun thing I want to do (preferably in the city).

 

Hopefully this goes lot better than last time

[SjardisDead]

That are a lot of GIF's and on another note, holy macaroni your new hair looks awesome.

 

Good luck with your challenge!

[shaar]

Gifs are looooovely!

 

 

New challenge, new chance to kick ass!

[kaelvan]

And this time I'm focusing on something I should of dealt with while back.

And thanks

[BlackTezca]

Oh the gifs!  I love all the gigs and I love this challenge and I wish you much joy and luck with it!!

 

 

I've been noticing you posting art too!!  Awesome and I'm glad that the 365 challenge is working out for you...though man that would be so stressful for me!!  Keep at it!

 

There are quite a few quests here too!  Good luck and rock out!

 

[kaelvan]

Not as stressful once I give myself guidelines and at time I must get it done.

 

I should do a schedule today. And I already did more with the program.

[kuraiuncia]

*settles in in an act of artist solidarity* HI

 

Love the gifs, love your goals. Gonna stick round here for more! Good luck on your challenge! You're gonna rock it. :3 

[BlackTezca]

I should do a schedule today. And I already did more with the program.

 

Awesome!   

 

And schedule's definitely help!

[SjardisDead]

 

on awesome gif party

 

 

It's good that you made a schedule it can save a lot of time and made thinks easier.

[kaelvan]

Trying so hard to stick to the schedule seems like everything keeps getting in the way of it.

 

Already feeling like going to die at the idea of my friend's art exhibit. I feel like skipping. Too deeply afraid of my parents finally kicking me out. Sucks so much being the disappointment child. I basically dropped out of college twice (couldn't do it, since had my stress and my family's to balance). I know this really getting bad after my mom going on about WHAT I AM going to spend my tax refund (hint not going towards a replacement car for my poor dying 20 yr car). Worst enough few times, she acts I owe her (feel like a maid around here now). Also, my mom basically deciding (without telling me) she doesn't want me to take job opportunity which $20 an hour for the summer, but *gasp* there's men. I want to punch her for that. Seriously I need that money. And I'm already being treat really poorly at my job, so what's big deal if I was to do that job instead. I feel like I'm forced into a corner at home.

 

I want a hug now.

[BlackTezca]

Trying so hard to stick to the schedule seems like everything keeps getting in the way of it.

 

Already feeling like going to die at the idea of my friend's art exhibit. I feel like skipping. Too deeply afraid of my parents finally kicking me out. Sucks so much being the disappointment child. I basically dropped out of college twice (couldn't do it, since had my stress and my family's to balance). I know this really getting bad after my mom going on about WHAT I AM going to spend my tax refund (hint not going towards a replacement car for my poor dying 20 yr car). Worst enough few times, she acts I owe her (feel like a maid around here now). Also, my mom basically deciding (without telling me) she doesn't want me to take job opportunity which $20 an hour for the summer, but *gasp* there's men. I want to punch her for that. Seriously I need that money. And I'm already being treat really poorly at my job, so what's big deal if I was to do that job instead. I feel like I'm forced into a corner at home.

 

I want a hug now.

 

 

You need and deserve all the hugs.  All the hugs!  That is so rough and I'm sorry you're going through such B.S right now

[SjardisDead]

BlackTezca is right you deserve them all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[EVEArgent]

Trying so hard to stick to the schedule seems like everything keeps getting in the way of it.

 

Already feeling like going to die at the idea of my friend's art exhibit. I feel like skipping. Too deeply afraid of my parents finally kicking me out. Sucks so much being the disappointment child. I basically dropped out of college twice (couldn't do it, since had my stress and my family's to balance). I know this really getting bad after my mom going on about WHAT I AM going to spend my tax refund (hint not going towards a replacement car for my poor dying 20 yr car). Worst enough few times, she acts I owe her (feel like a maid around here now). Also, my mom basically deciding (without telling me) she doesn't want me to take job opportunity which $20 an hour for the summer, but *gasp* there's men. I want to punch her for that. Seriously I need that money. And I'm already being treat really poorly at my job, so what's big deal if I was to do that job instead. I feel like I'm forced into a corner at home.

 

I want a hug now.

 

I can only give advice, without knowledge of your situation outside of this thread. But You have been to college, so you are an adult. If you need the job with $20/hr, TAKE IT! Your mother/parents cannot stop you from accepting a job. (I'm not sure what men being around a grown woman has to do with you not taking a job. There will be men in virtually every line of work.) Don't let her drag you down if you think you can succeed, and be happier, by taking the job. You will only start to regret and resent her if you don't do what you think is best for you.

 

Don't ask her if you can take the new job. Tell her you are doing it. She will deal with it. And if she does kick you out, you should be able to find -some- place with $20/hr in your pocket.

 

BE STRONG!

[kaelvan]

So I f***ed even more in my parents' eyes. Now back on my meds because of it. I feel so upset. I haven't been cutting or trying to kill myself, but because quote on quote went behind their backs to see old friend, who they say isn't good for me. *sigh* I really hate having my depression because my life becomes a democracy for the rest of the family to choice what happens in my life (no my words my mom's). Seriously why can't I f*** up like a normal adult? Why does my past constantly have to brought up? And why can't I for once be selfish (can't take being a door mat anymore)?

I should just accept I can't do anything about my life. I'm stuck again.

[Raincloak]

holy GIF overloads...

 

... hey, I have a dumb question to ask.  Can you go back on meds?  Because it sounds like you weren't ready to come off them.  (No shame in that; some people just gotta stay on them.)

 

also, totes time to move.  You've already noticed that living with parents means constant reminders of the past, and a young adult just does not need that.  I know cause I've been there.  I didn't get un-depressed when I moved out, but it definitely helped break some old patterns.  You'll be doing yourself and them a favor, believe me.  Please start pricing rooms on Craigslist.  Now.

 

oh, and take the job.  Money is money, and especially if you move out, you're gonna need $$.  20/hour is pretty awesome in this economy.  Grab it and run like hell!

 

I dropped in and out of college like four times before I graduated (blowing off numerous classes and sinking my GPA in the process, it was not pretty).  You haven't ruined it forever, I promise.  Just maybe need to break from school for a while.  It's okay.  It happens.