Noor: Breaking stoneshape

[Surakha]

Noor woke early under a warm snoring pile of cat and dog.  She smiled to herself, amused by the predictability of animals, even wild ones,  during a cold mountain night. She  looked for Sovellis and saw his bedroll empty.  Stretching and yawning, she slid out from under the sleeping pile and  moved to the fire to  rekindle the flame and  finish the porridge she had  left to cook overnight in the coals. She knew that now was a time for planning. She had to find a way out of her Stone Giant form and  a way to hold the curse further at bay. As she cooked and thought,  she  hummed an old halfling song to herself.  This felt somehow more manageable now that she was not alone. 

 

--,--'--@

 

Long Term Goal: As always, my goal is to lose 200 LBS.   My long term goal is also one of my primary focuses this time because I have to see my parents at the end of this challenge and they are super judgemental about my body and fitness.  As such, my goals are going to be designed to try and enhance weight loss and  building endurance.

 

Goal 1: Logging food I am going to track my food daily because I find that I lose weight much more consistently if I track. It helps me to be mindful of my food. 

 

+3 CON 38 or more days tracked +2 CON 28 days or more tracked +1 CON 14 days or more tracked

 

Goal 2: Endurance Through Cardio: I have had no luck with adding in daily cardio, but I really miss being able to walk all over the place and being confident in my body.  As such, I will walk for 10 minutes a day every day. Outside. Option to increase the time as the challenge goes. 

 

+3 STA 38 or more days +2 STA 28 or more days +1 STA 14 days or more

 

Goal 3: Getting Strong and Flexible: When training I prefer to work strength and flexibility both, training flexibility on my rest days from strength training. I find that I am less sore overall when I use this method, and I can simply alternate between 2 programs in the same 30-minute block of time, making it easy for scheduling and consistency purposes. I will alternate the following two programs this challenge:

 

STRENGTH: Angry Birds Workout

+2 STR 19 or more days +1.5 STR 14 or more days +1 STR 7 or more days

 

FLEXIBILITY: Yoga with Adrienne

+2 DEX 19 or more days +1.5 DEX 14 or more days +1 DEX 7 or more days

 

Lifestyle Goals: Self-Care: food, exercise, sleep. Creative outlets.  Social support. I need all these things. 

 

Goal A: Sleep Schedule:  I have to nail this because hospital job starts in August. The true goal is  in bed by 10 pm, up at 6. life is  complex though, so I m going to say  bed between 10 and midnight, up between 6 and 8. On gaming nights, bed as soon as we are done,  up 8 hours later. Gaming nights and social events don't like to bow to my schedule. 

 

+3 CON 38 days or more +2 CON 28 days or more +1 CON 14 days or more

 

Goal B: Creative outlets: I used to be  very creative in my life. I was always making things: sewing, weaving, drawing, crafting, and writing. I  have lost all of this in my life through  mental illness and graduate school scheduling limitations. I lost the motivation to  create, and  I feel the lack like a wound that never heals.  As such, I am going to add a goal of creating one creative project a week. This can include writing, but for a poem to count it has to also have a dynamic visual component. 

 

+2 CHA 6 projects or more +1.5CHA 4 projects +1 CHA 2 projects

 

 

My motivation, as always, is to shed the curse brought on me by mental illness, stress, trauma, and life. I want to get back to me. 

 

(one) (two) (three) (four) (five) (six)

[Elastigirl]

Awesome goals!

[Volki]

Really good goals I know you will do great

[Wild Wolf]

This is very motivational, and I love it! I love the weight loss goal! I have a good friend of mine who was once 370 lbs and over 40% BF. Now he is 6'5 so he carried the weight better than someone who walked around at 5'10, but in 2013, he started working out with me and I basically became his trainer. By the end of 2013, he had lost 107 lbs! He was weighing in at just above 260lbs and dropped to 17% BF! It was one of the most amazing transformations I had seen! And he did it all through hard work and dieting, that's it. No special pill or food-just good, hard discipline.

 

And with that being said, I think you're gonna eventually CRUSH your 200lb weight loss goal! And remember your weight loss is a journey, not a race. Let good ole fashion hard work show you the rewards that you seek

 

Wolf

[Surakha]

Sovellis returned to the hut and walked inside, looking for his friend. "Noor? You up? I saw some tracks out there that I don't like the look of." 

 

Noor turned form the fire and began to serve porridge. "Tracks? What sort? These woods are full of wild things."

 

"Big, with claws. Not a wolf, not sure what they're from. I swear something was following me, though. Do fae creatures leave tracks?" He shuddered at the thought. "I'll hunt it down and i guess we'll learn. Anyway, it's good to see you're up and about."

 

"Somehow I doubt that the high reaches fae leave tracks. They are much too weird. Come and have some porridge and then we can all go out and take a look. Hunting with two big predators is much safer than tracking alone. "She motioned to the table where there was now a resized chair on stilts with a small ladder step on the side.

 

He looked up at her with one brow arched high. "You want me to climb? You really are trying to kill me, aren't you? "

 

She laughed delightedly. "well it’s the best I could do. Unless you want to sit on the table."

 

They bantered back and forth as breakfast was eaten, laughed as dog and cat played a game of chase in the yard. Sovellis gathered his armor and weapons and headed off in search of his mystery beast and Noor was once again left to her own devices. She sat in her chair, staring out at the woods and thought. What was needed? Hunting she decided, of a more mundane sort. A stock pile of dried meats and trail rations would be needed if the quest took them any great distance and they would need to be prepared for anything. She whistled the animals to her and gathered her own weapons to her before starting off into the north woods. 

 

--,--;--@

 

This week has been kind of a prep week for me.  I am implementing changes that are goals in the challenge when I can and focusing on  working with my wife to create some structure in our house and routine that will support me in  enacting my goals.  One of the big issues that we have dealt with over the last challenges was the impact of  depression and  amotivation on the house. Even when I am feeling well, it has been hard to build any momentum with her symptoms taking up so much space.  Now, she is feeling somewhat better in that she has a bit more energy to apply to things and we are going to try and use it to  stick to a  stricter sleep and exercise routine nad get her  up and about more so that behavioral activation might have a chance to work on her. This also means that I will have someone to walk with and  someone to shoulder some of the errands and chores. 

[petefeet]

Following along Noor, looking forward to you kicking butt!!!

[mom2sjm]

I love your story and how it lines up with your goals/reflection!  I'll be back to see how the adventure unfolds...

[Surakha]

She settled back into her chair at the cabin with a feeling of satisfaction and  job well done.  Three  small deer were hanging in the shed beside the hut ready to be butchered and  she had also stumbled into a patch of ripe blackberries filling two waterproof bags with the sweet-tart fruit before heading home with her prizes. Sovellis sat in the early evening sun scribbling idly in his book and testing out lines of poetry on her and the dogs while supper simmered in the pot.  As she sat she pondered the rhyme carved into her wall for the hundredth time.  

To break the curse, to shed the stone

For actions taken you must atone

Free yourself from habits staid

Run, walk, jump, dance,

Fight with sharpened blade.

 

As she shifted, feeling the soft popping of tired muscles, she realized that the heavy lead feeling in her body was completely gone and that her skin felt more alive than it had  in a long time.  Maybe that's  what the spell called for, simply  living life and  doing the practical things that made up  her days back before, when the Path was from Dramm's Mine,  or from Ferrypoint, or from CInderdale. She felt a sudden longing for those long ago days, and for the younger Noor who thought nothing of  even giant sized hurdles as long as her chosen family was there.  She felt goosebumps for a moment and filed away her impressions for later.  There was soup to eat and  meat to butcher after all. She stood and stretched, crossing  to the doorway and the chores yet to be done. Behind her, the  first stanza carved into the stone glowed gently with purple fire. 

--,--'--@

We went for a walk today and it was terrible as I expected it to be.  I was in pain the whole time and I have pretty much no cardiovascular endurance, so I was a sweaty mess. I feel really good about it though even though it was terrible because  we  ended up walking closer to 30 minutes than 10 and it felt really nice to be outdoors and moving and doing something good for us.  

I am really grateful for my spouse. Because of her own body issues, she is very familiar with the fear/shame cycle that exercising outside holds for me.  I feel like everyone is watching me and judging me all the time,  the sad sweaty fat girl  trudging down the street barely able to walk for point a to point b.  Now, I know this is not really true and that  most people don't notice me or care about me at all, but  I still feel the burning of a thousand eyes sometimes. She is really patient when I get frustrated and snap at her too. I get upset at myself and where I'm at and I know I take it out on her. 

 

Any tips for not beating up on yourself  for letting things get this out of hand?

[Elastigirl]

Good for you for getting out there and doing it, even though it was hard. I think that is the best tip, is just doing it. Even if you only go for 10 minutes, do it every day.The more you do it, the more comfortable you will feel.

[Surakha]

Good for you for getting out there and doing it, even though it was hard. I think that is the best tip, is just doing it. Even if you only go for 10 minutes, do it every day.The more you do it, the more comfortable you will feel.

 

That is the plan! I have the  walking goal in part because I have to hike sand beach accesses in 6 weeks and in part because I  relly feel trapped by not being comfortable walking. 

[Surakha]

Following along Noor, looking forward to you kicking butt!!!

 

WOHOO!!!!

 

 

I love your story and how it lines up with your goals/reflection!  I'll be back to see how the adventure unfolds...

 

Aww thanks, and welcome!

 

This is very motivational, and I love it! I love the weight loss goal! I have a good friend of mine who was once 370 lbs and over 40% BF. Now he is 6'5 so he carried the weight better than someone who walked around at 5'10, but in 2013, he started working out with me and I basically became his trainer. By the end of 2013, he had lost 107 lbs! He was weighing in at just above 260lbs and dropped to 17% BF! It was one of the most amazing transformations I had seen! And he did it all through hard work and dieting, that's it. No special pill or food-just good, hard discipline.

 

And with that being said, I think you're gonna eventually CRUSH your 200lb weight loss goal! And remember your weight loss is a journey, not a race. Let good ole fashion hard work show you the rewards that you seek

 

Wolf

 

Thanks Wolf, your story is awesome. I hope to do exactly the same as your friend did- 100 lbs in a year's time. Every 50 lbs Noor gets closer to her real size after all, and she really wants to go back to being a halfling. 

 

 

 

Really good goals I know you will do great

Thanks for the good wishes!

[Jett]

Long Term Goal: As always, my goal is to lose 200 LBS.   My long term goal is also one of my primary focuses this time, because I have to see my parents at the end of this challenge and they are super judgemental about my body and fitness.  As such, my goals are going to be designed to try and enhance weight loss and  building endurance.

 

Ughhh, judgemental parents are the worst thing. I haven't been able to be truly myself with my parents since middle school or so. When every little thing is picked at and dissected, it's easier to expose as little as possble to their eyes...

 

Goal 1: Sleep Schedule:  I have to nail this, because hospital job starts in August. The true goal is  in bed by 10 pm, up at 6. life is  complex though, so I m going to say  bed between 10 and midnight, up between 6 and 8. On gaming nights, bed as soon as we are done,  up 8 hours later. Gaming nights and social events don't like to bow to my schedule. 

 

Heyyy, sleep goals! Seems like a lot of people are doing these this challenge. Best of luck; changing/creating good sleep habits is hard!

 

I've been using an app called Sleep Genius that uses sounds to mimic the patterns of a sleeping brain, masked by light classical music. Apparently, brains will start to match themselves to that pattern, which is supposed to help you fall asleep faster. It does seem to reduce the time it takes me to fall asleep somewhat, so maybe it could help? It's free.

[petefeet]

 

 

Any tips for not beating up on yourself  for letting things get this out of hand?

 

Maybe make yourself a list of all the good/great things you can do? And post it someplace around your house that you're going to see it often. A bit of positive reinforcement therapy?

 

I'm sure your spouse will be able to help you with this, it's always hard to see the best in yourselves.

[Surakha]

The day was warm and balmy and   the whine of mosquitoes joined the endless call of songbirds and meep of frogs.  Noor felt nostalgic for a moment,  thinking of her childhood woods down in the southern lands, where cicadas' calls dominated and warm soft humid air made her muscles feel oiled and smooth while she hiked. Today's hunting had felt like going uphill both  directions due to the rough terrain, but she  had come away with  three different types of lichens to add to their stores and provide welcome green in the trail bars she would be making tomorrow. She would check the slow bend in the river for watercress as well before turning  homeward. Maybe she'd get lucky and find a dandelion patch along the trail where the sun could hit the undergrowth. She paused at the top of a rise and  shrugged out of her pack, taking a moment to bend and stretch her body.  An old calf injury made her favor one leg slightly and the limp was causing havoc in her lower back. She knew she would be sore tonight,  but the feeling of  reconnecting with herself was worth it. 

--,--'--@

 

Went for a walk again today, this time for  10 -1 2 minutes instead of 30 plus.  I struggled,  I admit it.  I had pain in my body and frustration with my own panting and sweating.  But,  it felt good to do something two  days in a row and to get out into the beautiful Chicago weather. We're in the magic time right now, where it's beautiful out most days and sunny.  I think this weekend we will go down to the lake to walk if Shelby is up for it.  I love the scenery down there and  it's nice to walk in the sand sometimes.

 

I feel tentatively hopeful and ready for the official challenge to begin.  

[Surakha]

Maybe make yourself a list of all the good/great things you can do? And post it someplace around your house that you're going to see it often. A bit of positive reinforcement therapy?

 

I'm sure your spouse will be able to help you with this, it's always hard to see the best in yourselves.

 

This is a good idea.  Maybe I should do bathroom mirror affirmations as part of my lifestyle goal. *ponder*

[Surakha]

BOO double post. So instead I give you an awesome Autostraddle article:

 

 

Sober in the City: top 10 iced teas for national iced tea month

 

 

I mean, come on. 

[petefeet]

 

 

Went for a walk again today, this time for  10 -1 2 minutes instead of 30 plus.  I struggled,  I admit it.  I had pain in my body and frustration with my own panting and sweating.  But,  it felt good to do something two  days in a row

 

Yeah you struggled and were out of breath, but guess what? You're turning it into a HABIT!!! Congrats

[Jett]

Also, I know your frustration/embarassment is mostly in your head and may not be that easily overcome, but... most people sweat when they walk around outside in the heat. Try to remember that you're not really doing anything weird or noticeable when you're sweating or panting. That's pretty normal.

[spooky]

Hey Noor! I love your goals, and your story so I'm following along! Thanks for being awesome 

 

Went for a walk again today, this time for  10 -1 2 minutes instead of 30 plus.  I struggled,  I admit it. 

 I know these feels. I struggle with putting a time quota on my goals because when I do it never feels like I'm doing enough. So maybe go with the something is better than nothing approach? A ten minute walk is still great. Sometimes I do lots of mini ten minute walks throughout the day and it adds up pretty quick. Anyways you did great just by fighting your brain and going for a walk anyways. You still got movement in two days in a row! Keep it up, you're making a lot of positive steps 

 

Edited to add: I used to hate sweating, but I'm starting to love it because then I know the workout has been effective.  Mental re-framing is tough but worth it. You'll get there, I know it! 

[Surakha]

Noor packed  fresh made journey cakes into her satchel along with a few honey cakes and the last of the fresh berries. She settled the pack on her back, hitching her shoulders to  get the straps into their old familiar grooves against her armor. This felt right and proper,  a thing that Noor VonKlaven did often back in the old days when things were good and there was no curse.  She smiled to herself as SOvellis griped over  the last of his packing.  Today they would journey to the  tower that fell and  see what there was to see at the site of her misfortune. Dispite the seriousness of the quest,  Noor felt remarkably like singing. 

 

--,--'--@

 

Good morning everyone!  This  challenge is starting off on a positive note with me getting up on time nad  packing a lunch before heading out to meet with the  last practicum client I have to  see before this last hurdle is jumped. I feel  extremely optimistic  today and ready for anything.  It's taken two challenges and many ups and downs, but I'm finally starting to feel like following healthy patterns is congruent and a part of who I want to be; its one thing to know it intellectually, but a much rarer thing to feel it intuitively too. 

 

I hope everyone's Monday goes well!

[Jett]

I feel  extremely optimistic  today and ready for anything.  It's taken two challenges and many ups and downs, but I'm finally starting to feel like following healthy patterns is congruent and a part of who I want to be; its one thing to know it intellectually, but a much rarer thing to feel it intuitively too. 

 

Yeah!! That's a great way to feel starting out the challenge! You can rock this!

[spooky]

 

Good morning everyone!  This  challenge is starting off on a positive note with me getting up on time nad  packing a lunch before heading out to meet with the  last practicum client I have to  see before this last hurdle is jumped. I feel  extremely optimistic  today and ready for anything.  It's taken two challenges and many ups and downs, but I'm finally starting to feel like following healthy patterns is congruent and a part of who I want to be; its one thing to know it intellectually, but a much rarer thing to feel it intuitively too. 

 

I hope everyone's Monday goes well!

Yeah!!!!! What a great way to start off the challenge! This made my morning! Hope your day is full of smiles, you are going to beast this challenge, I have no doubt 

[Surakha]

Yeah!! That's a great way to feel starting out the challenge! You can rock this!

 

 

Yeah!!!!! What a great way to start off the challenge! This made my morning! Hope your day is full of smiles, you are going to beast this challenge, I have no doubt 

 

Thanks for the cheers guys, I really appreciate it!

[Surakha]

The end of the day found them closer to the tower but  not nearly as far along as Noor had hoped.  Despite their best efforts,  a huge storm had blown up,  drenching them in chilly downpours and  bruising them with hail.  For once Noor was grateful for her large size and tough skin- the hail was not so scary. Poor Sovellis had to hide beneath her arms to stay out of danger. 

 

They made camp in a small clearing surrounded by  bramble patches and thick undergrowth. Dog and cat settled down to watch and Sovellis quickly had a small fire laid.  Noor felt creaky and sore from the humid rain and took the time to stretch her body before settling into dinner.  She  hung on to her optimism despite the  waves of exhaustion overtaking her.  So they wouldn't get there in two easy day's travel. At least it was  just a storm and not the season of Monsoons from her homeland. The now clear sky was full of a million stars, and she sipped mint tea while the elf absently played scales on his lute. It was a good beginning. 

 

--,--'--@

 

I am so tired I can't even think straight.  I have completed all goals for the day so far though!  Got up on time, walked all over at school, did my paperwork for practicum, logged all my foods and even turned away take out. My original plan was to start with strength training today and then alternate, but the energy was not there- I  did yoga instead. 

 

Oh! I also added a goal to  do one project a week  in order to try and rekindle my creative spark. Also, I was sorted into Ravenclaw for the Assassin Minis and am really excited! I have a real fondness in my heart  for Slytherin but  who I am is definitely Ravenclaw. Luna Lovegood shall be my inspiration and picture of the rest of the challenge.  

 

[Jett]

I am so tired I can't even think straight.  I have completed all goals for the day so far though!

...

Also, I was sorted into Ravenclaw for the Assassin Minis and am really excited! I have a real fondness in my heart  for Slytherin but  who I am is definitely Ravenclaw. Luna Lovegood shall be my inspiration and picture of the rest of the challenge.  

 

That's the stubborn Noor we all know and love. Very well done, especially turning down takeout and being flexible about matching your workout to your needs.

 

I am definitely a Ravenclaw as well, but I don't think I can be in the assassin mini this time. :/ (I really want to! They're super fun, but crazy!) I adore Luna and your profile pic. :3