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Camp Time Challenge, Terinatum


Terinatum

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I am stuck here on this Saturday evening. It is hard. It is long. It is vital. And still I struggle to get everyone inside on the same page, fighting on the same team.

W1 D6

Welcome to Radio Hour!

Now a piece from Mary Cheapen Carpenter. Enjoy!

"I'm a blur on the driver's side. I am a town. I am a town, southbound."

Yes yes folks, this melancholy country ballad is just what the Rebel you know as Terinatum is feeling this very day. Oh she has had it tough and yet she still strives. And she knows the audience here with me now, is her biggest support in this ongoing trip to healthy and happy.

It is likely this day just got out ahead of her well before she had a chance to organize herself, her thoughts, and her to-do list. There is a lot of chatter from her 'Little Ones' that she has inside about not feeling comfortable being thinner and that they are afraid people are going to start expecting more from her just because she's lost so much weight.

Indeed, it's a delicate thing to let yourself be exposed in a new way. Terri has spent decades as a fat person. And now the last two and a half years have changed her physically to an amazing degree. So, she said to me the other day, "I think it's unfortunate and sad that I feel as though I'm losing a protective shield that was my over-sized fat cells." We talked a lot about the emotional protection eating affords us and the fat we carry with us can also be a protector. 'Who wants to bother with a big lady who's always depressed and looking unwell?' Both Terinatum and I realize the statement in itself is false in that the bearer of the weight and the sadness is in fact worth as much as anyone else. But a sad mind is hard to convince.

Terri said, "It is the pain and the shame that I carry with me that is holding me back. There are a thousand layers of healing. What one day brings clarity and forward progress is actually a precursor to the day you will need to get to the next layer and succeed with the skills you learnt that one day. Most days, for the last few years, have been more positive than sad. But the hard days scare me. Does it mean that this is the beginning of another crash for me? Am I headed back to the hospital? I want so much for that question to spur me on to Head down healthier and happier pathways. It has and it hasn't. Depends on the day!"

I told her to be gentle with herself and that she has indeed succeeded in these last few years, and before Nerd Fitness as well. I am beginning to wonder if the fear of backtracking is one of the biggest deterrents to attempting that which we dearly want. What do you think? has today been a day of forward movement? yes? Great, what sill have you leveled up in? no? What hurdle got in your way? Can you be proud of yourself no matter what happened today? We truly hope so. It is the best medicine.

So that's the scoop today. I'm the Writer and I am pleased to bring you another day of Scout Terinatum!

Our show has been sponsored by...

3 Musketeers and Twirlers. But! , We are in the middle of contract renegotiations.

So tonight's radio show is actually sponsored by Meat!!

"Whether it's chicken, beef,

turkey or duck,

it'll make you strong

and make you smile!

Until next time. Good nite, Rebels!

  • Like 6

22nd level Wanderer

better is right here, right now

The Way

Here's to all the 1% increases in life!

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*offers strawberries to accompany all the chocolate* Vitamin C?

 

 

I know that what I am about to say is thought to be a counter intuitive measure, however it helps me from time to time:

 

If I perform a negative behavior, or am working on a behavior that I am trying to change -- such as healthy eating -- I can, for example, eat a snickers, typically the opposite of healthy eating, but my form of punishment for eating the snickers is to consume a vegetable or fruit immediately. This does not counter-act the snickers health wise, but it has made me think about what I am doing.The trick is to not get into the habit of preemptively eating vegetables or fruit and then feeling justified in eating the snickers.

 

Alternatively, if you are having trouble putting down the candy bag -- eat one candy, then immediately brush your teeth! The taste and feel of tooth paste often puts any notion of continued chocolate splurge on hold. 

  • Like 4

STRENGTH (0) | DEXTERITY (-1) | CONSTITUTION (1) | WISDOM (3) | INTELLIGENCE (3) | CHARISMA (2)

Syren  -- Chaotic Good -- Human Druish Ranger -- Current Challenge -- Battle Log

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Thanks, Ladies.
I appreciate the love, and the ideas.
I might try the veggie one, that sounds kinda neat.
Tomorrow will be better: no pet jobs until after Camp! Yay! And I am being social everyday this week, starting tomorrow. They are either short-timed or somewhere I can crash. So, I have 4 visits planned and two visits that I would like to get in as well. I'll let you know how it goes.

I am putting together the mini for Week 3 so be ready!

  • Like 2

22nd level Wanderer

better is right here, right now

The Way

Here's to all the 1% increases in life!

Link to post

Tell that Sugar Monster to begone! You can do it! That toothpaste idea sounds cruel but effective. Today is a new day!

  • Like 3

Currently Walking / Biking / Hiking to Mordor 

On my way to Rivendell: 208.14 / 458 miles 

"I learned this, at least, by my experiment: that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours." Henry David Thoreau, Walden

The Awesome Runner's Awesome Running Blog

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Good luck with the visits. I have found that the older I get the more exhausting socializing is (but also how essential it is for my mental well being).

 

 

This is so true!! You've got a lot of visits planned (which is awesome!) but after one or two straight days of people, I would definitely needs some "me" time to recharge. 

  • Like 2

Currently Walking / Biking / Hiking to Mordor 

On my way to Rivendell: 208.14 / 458 miles 

"I learned this, at least, by my experiment: that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours." Henry David Thoreau, Walden

The Awesome Runner's Awesome Running Blog

Link to post

Thank you, my peeps. I needed that. Last night was really painful emotionally.

 

I am visiting with my bestie (who's my ex) and I am feeling better.

Therapy was hard as I was in a dark place and not willing to let it go. I actually zoned out and J brought me back. And kept me working which I am thankful for.

I keep beating myself whenever others don't care about me and do their job. The problem is apparent to most, but not to me, not when I'm hurting. You see, they don't have to care (my need to judge their level of caring, means that no matter what, I will not judge them good enough), they are a system; understaffed, under-trained, and underfunded.

 

So, letting go is my next challenge. I need to advocate for myself within the system without taking it personally when I don't get what I need. No matter if I deserve it or not; that's NOT the item of judgment for me. My anger should fuel positive work, finding opportunities and ways of getting my needs met. Beating and eating, do not work, please change the channel. Do you here that, Brain! No beating on me or anyone for the frustration of life. I want to use your anger and turn it into energy I can use to do something! Something good! Something good for me!!!! You have been told, it will be the truth soon.

 

Come with me, Rebels. I want the good things with me as I walk this path. Anyone have a good joke to start us off?

  • Like 1

22nd level Wanderer

better is right here, right now

The Way

Here's to all the 1% increases in life!

Link to post

Well I did something fun yesterday.  I was missing a couple buttons off my favorite lab coat.  We had some extra bits from old models sitting around the labs and I basically drilled holes in a couple intervertebral disks and sewed them onto my lab coat with postmortem thread.

 

You know, for those times when you lack a spine......

 

We are an easily amused bunch in my area.

  • Like 1

Food Fight - current challenge

Yeary Bug Count 0... if you are out and about then you are probably eating bugs. :onthego:

2015 - 22.5 bugs consumed

Chasing down the most awesome version of myself one step at a time.

The Character Battle Log 1 Daily Mile

 

 

Link to post

Well I did something fun yesterday.  I was missing a couple buttons off my favorite lab coat.  We had some extra bits from old models sitting around the labs and I basically drilled holes in a couple intervertebral disks and sewed them onto my lab coat with postmortem thread.

 

You know, for those times when you lack a spine......

 

We are an easily amused bunch in my area.

 

gallery_13464_215_50.gif

  • Like 2

22nd level Wanderer

better is right here, right now

The Way

Here's to all the 1% increases in life!

Link to post

A rabbit walks into a bar and says,

"Got any carrots, mate?"

Bartender looks over and says,

"We don't serve rabbits! Get out!"

The next night, the same thing.

"Got any carrots, mate?"

Bartender says, "I told you, we don't serve your kind. If you come in here again, I'll nail your ears to the bar! Scram!!!

The next night, the rabbit walks in and asks,

"Got any nails, mate."

"No."

Rabbit says, "Got any carrots?" 

  • Like 2

22nd level Wanderer

better is right here, right now

The Way

Here's to all the 1% increases in life!

Link to post

I got my room assignment for Camp and they gave us a link to a map of the place. Very excited! The easy trail to the river is actually right near my cabin so yay for short walks!

 

Speaking of walks. I just went to the grocery store for a few items. That's down 4 flights of stairs (usually easy as my weight stays over my hips), along 2 blocks of cement sidewalk, and 1 asphalt parking lot, about 11 minutes in the store (thin tile on cement), and back the same way except 1 extra block of cement sidewalk, and elevator up to the 5th floor and a long hallway of hardwood floors. Put away groceries, and sat down. I am winded, naturally (haven't done that much with weight in my hands), and feeling a bit light-headed, but otherwise pretty good! I had a few twinges in the store, but it ended up being gas. I had onions on my turkey sub this afternoon! lol

 

water - need higher daily intake of water before camp.

  • Like 4

22nd level Wanderer

better is right here, right now

The Way

Here's to all the 1% increases in life!

Link to post

A little piggy walks into a market and asked for one liter of soda.  He guzzles and asks where the restroom is.  The clerk tells him it is down the hall and to the right.

A second piggy walks in and askes for 2 liters of soda.  He guzzles and asks where the restroom is.  The clerk tells him it is down the hall and to the right.

A third and then a fourth piggy walks in and asks for 3 and 4 liters of soda.  They each guzzle it down and each asks the clerk where the restroom is.  The clerk tells each of them it is down the hall and to the right.

A fifth piggy walks in and asks for 5 liters of soda.  As he guzzles it down the clerk trying to be slick says "I bet you want to know where the restroom is.  Well it is down the hall and to the right."  The fifth piggy finishes his drinks and sets it down and says to the clerk, "Nope.  I'm the little piggy that goes wee wee wee all the home.".

  • Like 1

Food Fight - current challenge

Yeary Bug Count 0... if you are out and about then you are probably eating bugs. :onthego:

2015 - 22.5 bugs consumed

Chasing down the most awesome version of myself one step at a time.

The Character Battle Log 1 Daily Mile

 

 

Link to post

My format has been all over the place this challenge! hehe

 

Today, my parents came over and helped me with some housework. Yay parents.

I'm noticing some muscle improvement when I climb UP stairs.Which is weird until I realized that walking downstairs hasn't been that bad. I think because my hips aren't sashaying back and forth, it keeps them from getting angry quickly. I walked up 4 flights today, after being worn down some, and only felt a few twinges of, 'please tell me why the hell we're doing this.'

 

Water has been dismal and I want to turn that around this weekend. I can't be dehydrated at Camp.

No other activities beyond housework today.

Was able to stop and take a nap even with my parents still working. Pretty rare for me. So, not a Zero day at all.Half-way decent recovery day. Need more protein though!

  • Like 1

22nd level Wanderer

better is right here, right now

The Way

Here's to all the 1% increases in life!

Link to post

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