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Gobnait's temporary "feeling things out" topic


Gobnait

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I decided to use a positive topic this time, so let's see if reality conforms to it by the end.  "Gobnait is competent"

 

Since my goal of making the house comfortable relies on hubby's help, I'm going to focus on what I can do to keep things from going to heck.  I think part of that is to focus on fun instead of frustration.  If I get into a kitchen-rut again, I may go on a cooking strike.

 

By November 2, I should have a list of "Things I should be doing" that is hanging up instead of hidden away online.  The kitchen list that is already on my fridge, once I write "Know what's for dinner" on it, is good enough to count.  But I would rather get a bulletin board set up.

 

I think I should consider "have adventures weekly" with some sort of instant reward if I manage it, but I'm not sure what will really have an impact.

 

I want to have busy-activities ready and actually say that I used them and replaced them.  I don't want to say I hung out online for all of my down-time.

 

I think that I should keep an at-least weekly photo blog with how the house looks.  Morning and evening for days where I might have done something significant.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  • Like 1

I have conditions that affect my social awareness.  If I am rude, tell me what I could do better.

5'8" & 220 260 pounds | Miles Walked: X

2019: | 1 | 2 | 3 |

Pre 2017: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | * | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 |

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Hi gobnait.

 

I like the positive term philosophy myself. Of course, I sometimes I don't stop in time or just plain forget. I'm curious if you have thought about the word 'should' to see if it's a positive enforcement for you or a negative one. I find it puts me in a mood, like I'm following someone else's orders - I use want and need and must more often now. But others use 'should' quite well and get good results. So how does it work for you?

 

I really like the 'have adventures weekly,' that's awesome. And being accountable via photos is a great way to help make it happen.

So, best of luck and I'll be checking back it for epic results!

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better is right here, right now

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Competent is having the kitchen be clean at some point in the day and getting dinner on the table with a minimum of fuss.  It's being able to get the rest of the tidying done in an hour and ending by sweeping a feather-duster over the surfaces that need it.

 

Incompetent is spending the day in front of the computer, doing nothing useful, rather than confront how unwelcoming the house is.  Half of the reason now that I don't go places is that coming back here after leaving for a bit is like drying off and jumping back into a cold lake.

 

Competent is having maybe six hours during hubby's workday where I can either do art projects or quiet activities in complete relaxation, or be able to go out and not return to a disappointment that's guaranteed to bum me out no matter what joy or anxiety I experience in other places.

  • Like 1

I have conditions that affect my social awareness.  If I am rude, tell me what I could do better.

5'8" & 220 260 pounds | Miles Walked: X

2019: | 1 | 2 | 3 |

Pre 2017: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | * | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 |

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I think that I should keep an at-least weekly photo blog with how the house looks.  Morning and evening for days where I might have done something significant.

I think talking photos would really help with accountability.  

 

Now.  Go be great!  :frog:

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Hi gobnait.

 

I like the positive term philosophy myself. Of course, I sometimes I don't stop in time or just plain forget. I'm curious if you have thought about the word 'should' to see if it's a positive enforcement for you or a negative one. I find it puts me in a mood, like I'm following someone else's orders - I use want and need and must more often now. But others use 'should' quite well and get good results. So how does it work for you?

 

I really like the 'have adventures weekly,' that's awesome. And being accountable via photos is a great way to help make it happen.

So, best of luck and I'll be checking back it for epic results!

 

Should is softer than want or need... in the case of adventuring, it comes both from inside and outside.  Lately it's for the sake of the cat.  She screams whenever I leave the house, so if I leave more often, maybe she'll get used to it.

  • Like 1

I have conditions that affect my social awareness.  If I am rude, tell me what I could do better.

5'8" & 220 260 pounds | Miles Walked: X

2019: | 1 | 2 | 3 |

Pre 2017: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | * | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 |

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Competent is having the kitchen be clean at some point in the day and getting dinner on the table with a minimum of fuss.  It's being able to get the rest of the tidying done in an hour and ending by sweeping a feather-duster over the surfaces that need it.

 

Incompetent is spending the day in front of the computer, doing nothing useful, rather than confront how unwelcoming the house is.  Half of the reason now that I don't go places is that coming back here after leaving for a bit is like drying off and jumping back into a cold lake.

 

Competent is having maybe six hours during hubby's workday where I can either do art projects or quiet activities in complete relaxation, or be able to go out and not return to a disappointment that's guaranteed to bum me out no matter what joy or anxiety I experience in other places.

That sounds tough! It seems like you're going through a really challenging time with this. 

 

I think that it's very difficult for a person to manage their own time. In a way, it's a lot easier to get things done at a job, or when you have a specific task or assignment, like in school. Then you know exactly what you have to do, and you just have to figure out how to do it. When you're setting your own goals, you have to choose from all of the different things that you could be doing, and find the motivation in yourself to actually do them! It's a difficult task, and I think it's one that people don't always appreciate as being difficult. 

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That sounds tough! It seems like you're going through a really challenging time with this. 

 

I think that it's very difficult for a person to manage their own time. In a way, it's a lot easier to get things done at a job, or when you have a specific task or assignment, like in school. Then you know exactly what you have to do, and you just have to figure out how to do it. When you're setting your own goals, you have to choose from all of the different things that you could be doing, and find the motivation in yourself to actually do them! It's a difficult task, and I think it's one that people don't always appreciate as being difficult. 

 

There is a lot of truth to this. ^^

 

Managing the own time without any given framework such as work can be very hard. 

Too much of a tight framework can be very hard as well … I know that one the best, unfortunately. 

 

The art is to find a feasible middle way instead of falling to one of the extremes.

 

I believe that you can do this. 

 

Following! :)

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I third the sentiments above. It's hard to get things done when you have no external schedule imposed upon you because you can always do it later and then when it's later, you can do it later still until you've spent the whole day not doing the thing you wanted to do. It's also hard when you have too much to do and you're just too busy or exhausted to do more when you're done work or whatever.

 

 

So actually, if you're having trouble getting things done, maybe taking a class outside the home could be helpful? It could be a drawing class or a fitness class or whatever. Just something that you feel obliged to do (which has the bonus that you're forced to leave the house) but it puts a few constraints on your time so you don't end up procrastinating all day.

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That sounds tough! It seems like you're going through a really challenging time with this. 

 

I think that it's very difficult for a person to manage their own time. In a way, it's a lot easier to get things done at a job, or when you have a specific task or assignment, like in school. Then you know exactly what you have to do, and you just have to figure out how to do it. When you're setting your own goals, you have to choose from all of the different things that you could be doing, and find the motivation in yourself to actually do them! It's a difficult task, and I think it's one that people don't always appreciate as being difficult. 

 

 

There is a lot of truth to this. ^^

 

Managing the own time without any given framework such as work can be very hard. 

Too much of a tight framework can be very hard as well … I know that one the best, unfortunately. 

 

The art is to find a feasible middle way instead of falling to one of the extremes.

 

I believe that you can do this. 

 

Following! :)

 

 

I third the sentiments above. It's hard to get things done when you have no external schedule imposed upon you because you can always do it later and then when it's later, you can do it later still until you've spent the whole day not doing the thing you wanted to do. It's also hard when you have too much to do and you're just too busy or exhausted to do more when you're done work or whatever.

 

 

So actually, if you're having trouble getting things done, maybe taking a class outside the home could be helpful? It could be a drawing class or a fitness class or whatever. Just something that you feel obliged to do (which has the bonus that you're forced to leave the house) but it puts a few constraints on your time so you don't end up procrastinating all day.

 

I've actually thought about making some sort of appointment so I HAVE to go out.  The trouble is that a lot of times I have to make my hubby drive me to medical appointments now because the schedule makes me freak.  I need something that is free or paid-by-session no I'm not being wasteful if I run late or can't drive.

 

My actual topic is up now... http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/73647-gobnait-takes-photos/ We can either let this one drift to the bottom, or I wouldn't mind it being moved to the previous challenge.

I have conditions that affect my social awareness.  If I am rude, tell me what I could do better.

5'8" & 220 260 pounds | Miles Walked: X

2019: | 1 | 2 | 3 |

Pre 2017: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | * | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 |

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