Urgan Shows Up, Does the Thing

[Urgan]

11/23/2016 + 11/24/2016

Food, family, and f-tards

 

Eat

Lunch - Far East Beef and Rice ; Thanksgiving stuffs

Dinner - baked spaghetti ; post-Thanksgiving pizza, as one does

 

Recover

Up with the Chickens - 17/20

Ice that Back - 13/16

 

Do the Thing

Journal weekday stress - 19/20
DB Rows - 4/4
Bokken work 3/4

 

Squats - 45 1x5

  115 1x3

  135 1x1

  155 1x5--5RM PR!!

  155 2x3

DB Rows - 25 3x10

 

I failed at getting in bed in time Tuesday night because Mike got home at 9:30 all upset and things just went to Hell. Consequently, I woke up and also had more straightening out to do before leaving late for the gym. I only had time and energy for the above. I did manage a 5RM PR on 5 hours of sleep, so lol that. Thanksgiving with people who aren't helping my husband deal with his blind and disabled father who was forced back home to a place with a hole in the floor and a non-working toilet with no immediate prospect of full-time care was...special. One of them being his identical twin brother. Yeah, he has an evil twin--or at least a monumentally selfish one. We made some progress by the end of it, though. Mike is taking Life better now, he was just at the end of his rope. This could change yet again, but for now we are better off. 

 

Oh, and ice and rows happened, too. 

[ixaera]

YEESH people :/

Good job getting through the things on low sleep and irritation, though

[Urgan]

11/25/2016 + 11/26/2016

Screwed by "Earth Hour"

 

Eat

Lunch - stuff

Dinner - more stuff, pizza, nobody cares

 

Recover

Up with the Chickens - 18/20

Ice that Back - 13/16

 

Do the Thing

Journal weekday stress - 20/20
DB Rows - 4/4
Bokken work 3/4

 

OHP - 45 1x5

           60 3x3

           70 1x2--2RM PR!!

R. Delt - 15 3x10

 

Squats - 45 1x5

  115 1x3

  145 1x1

  172.5 1x2

DL - 135 1x5

  160 1x3

  200 2x3

 

 

This week has been a blur of awful, but there's light at the end of the tunnel and I'm about 75% sure it's not an oncoming train. If you want an idea of what my role was, I was a telephone operator connecting various family members a la passing info I was told by one person to the other. Literally a channel for emergency needs, emotions, etc because my husband just couldn't take it anymore. I was sitting on the bench at the gym with two phones, just to keep Mike and his phone separate, field calls/texts, and try to get my lifts in. You see now why this might have caused a problem for performance. I was so distracted I did not pull up my knee sleeves and I think I didn't tighten my belt enough. SIGH.

 

 

I've been following everyone and reading your updates. I'm sorry I haven't been replying, but I haven't fallen off the face of the earth and next week shooooooooooould be better. This is the last official post re: November's goals, I'm dumping this month down the memory hole and going to just reporting whatever for the next week while I figure out what's ACTUALLY going to happen vs what has been promised ( * barf * ). I'll lift, I'll aikido, I'm pretty sure I'm going to eat and maybe sleep. That's pretty much it. There will be a chiro appointment on Tuesday. I'll repeat my squats because ladies and gents, I was too stressed out to make a triple at 172.5 and it was obvious. I stalled a full second on the way up on that second rep, it was as bad as...as this week has been. That's okay, I'm just chalking it up to surviving family shit beyond my control. We had to pull together and the worst may or may not be past. Another family member is spiraling downhill medically and we may be looking at a funeral soon. It's not exactly a surprise, but it doesn't make it any easier. It doesn't affect me directly, but it will affect Mike and his mom enough to deep six Christmas, let's just say. So yeah. Good times.

 

I pledge to try to be more upbeat here, because so much just isn't hitting me as hard as it's hitting others, it may be over, and in general dwelling on things you cannot help is about as healthy as walking around smoking a stick of dynamite. Or something. Anyway, trying to keep on doing stuff while doing my part to be helpful no matter how much things are on fire. Because I am still a person no matter what is happening to the in-laws. A positive way to look at it is people who've never spoken together are speaking in order to try to pull together enough support to get stuff done...all except one...oh wait, positive things. Um, well, it's almost over. Yeah. We may be in the clear and things can go back to normal in a couple weeks. Plz.

[Sam Ashen]

Christmas Season Stress.  Hard to like.  Sorry.

[Urgan]

4 minutes ago, Sam Ashen said:

Christmas Season Stress.  Hard to like.  Sorry.

 

I think I should make a December goal to not whine, lol. I'm not the worst off person on in my family, much less NF or the greater world beyond. Thanks for listening all the same. 

[Urgan]

On 11/25/2016 at 9:11 AM, ixaera said:

YEESH people :/

Good job getting through the things on low sleep and irritation, though

 

Yeah, this is a good summary of how things have been during a good chunk of this week. Sleep has been improving, though, at least. 

[ixaera]

38 minutes ago, Urgan said:

We had to pull together and the worst may or may not be past. Another family member is spiraling downhill medically and we may be looking at a funeral soon.

 

<3 I'm sorry the year isn't winding down very well for you and yours. All the positive psy-waves

[shaar]

Dude.  I feel you.  Seriously.  This week has been an absolute firestorm of nope.

 

We'll all do our best to prop each other up and hobble through December in one piece!

[Emerald_Dragonfly]

21 minutes ago, Urgan said:

 

I think I should make a December goal to not whine, lol. I'm not the worst off person on in my family, much less NF or the greater world beyond. Thanks for listening all the same. 

 

If that goal helps you, go for it!  The flip side is that we are here if you want or need to vent.  Flipping again, in the past, I have had very good experiences on NF by deliberately crafting a challenge month around positive posts...

Family stress can be all consumingly awful.  It may help to make this a place for you to get away from that stress.  Lots of flip sides, lol.  

 

Hugs.

[Urgan]

55 minutes ago, ixaera said:

 

<3 I'm sorry the year isn't winding down very well for you and yours. All the positive psy-waves

 

50 minutes ago, shaar said:

Dude.  I feel you.  Seriously.  This week has been an absolute firestorm of nope.

 

We'll all do our best to prop each other up and hobble through December in one piece!

 

45 minutes ago, Emerald_Dragonfly said:

 

If that goal helps you, go for it!  The flip side is that we are here if you want or need to vent.  Flipping again, in the past, I have had very good experiences on NF by deliberately crafting a challenge month around positive posts...

Family stress can be all consumingly awful.  It may help to make this a place for you to get away from that stress.  Lots of flip sides, lol.  

 

Hugs.

 

Thank you, one and all. I think another goal should be to make it 'round to everybody I'm allegedly following on the regular and comment, even if it's nonsense, lol. I am a pro complainer and so try to be cognizant of how much of it I do, but sometimes I lose track. In this case, I can only vent so much to family et al so having this outlet is a God-send. I can obscurely whine about stuff, flail around and smash things, and nobody minds! Or at least they don't mind too much, lol. Comes a point where you just woman up, put your shoulder into it, and trudge on. Having y'all around to support me makes it easier. 

 

 

Wrap-up of this travesty of a month coming shortly~ I'll keep it short and sweet-esqe. 

[Urgan]

WEEK 4 DEBRIEF!

What...is going on here?

 

Eat

 

Week 4 Average:

           Cals   /   Carbs   /   Fats    /  Protein /  Sugar

AVG    2293        217         106          119             60  

TGT    2500        292           97          125           100  

DLTA -207 -75 9 -6 -40

 

You know that funny joke about Thanksgiving being a time you pig out and eat a lot of food? Yeah, me neither. I'm just now realizing how "under" I've been this week. Part of it is due to not knowing what on earth dinner will be so I BS'd some data that wasn't too extreme in the Dinner column just because I figure I can make 40g protein somehow the rest of the day, right? Still, not my strongest showing, but I really can't care. Wipe the slate clean, start again. Can't be fussed with measurements other than this graph, I think it sorta tells a story of its own. 

 

 

Recover

Up with the Chickens - 18/20

Ice that Back - 13/16

 

Do the Thing

Journal weekday stress - 20/20
DB Rows - 4/4
Bokken work 3/4

 

I don't think I'm as stressed out about work as I was 3-4 weeks in. That was pretty hard, but I'm beginning to adjust to the commute, which is honestly the hardest part as of now. Icing makes me feel good up 'til it gets cold and then ice feels like the worst idea since evil twins. I don't think Rows are a problem for me, not in this form at least. I will keep doing them with a careful eye on how I feel. On a COMPLETELY unrelated note * coughs * I have a headache now that needs addressing. I need to begin considering what I should do going into the Christmas season. I'm not getting the impression that ramping up with a ton of goals is a thing I should do, so another simple month, it is! 'til next time, everyone~

[RedStone]

Catching up and yay nerdiversary! 

 

So one millionth-ing on being here if you need to vent, I would hardly call that complaining. Life stuff happens, life stuff is hard and mean. Being strong for others can be some of the hardest stuff on us, and  then having others being strong for us... I mean, that's why we all lift right? I'm on board for a big smell you later to November, let's get through this year and see about smashing 2017.

 

 

[Dagger]

Do whatever works for you. I'm here listening/reading. I don't often comment, but always read.

 

Sometimes we just need an outlet. And sometimes like @Emerald_Dragonfly said we need a place for just positivity. Whichever does you most good will be best.

[ixaera]

4 hours ago, Urgan said:

What...is going on here?

 

man I dunno but it sure is mesmerizing

 

4 hours ago, Urgan said:

Icing makes me feel good up 'til it gets cold and then ice feels like the worst idea since evil twins.

 

Icing stuff + winter sounds like a way to be really uncomfortable (especially if you're like me, have gas heat, and try to tough it out when it's below the comfort zone)

 

4 hours ago, Urgan said:

I'm not getting the impression that ramping up with a ton of goals is a thing I should do, so another simple month, it is! 'til next time, everyone~

 

Simple = smart when life is full of stressors

You = smart

[Jord]

data <3 

[Urgan]

11/28/2016

Complete the sentence

 

Lunch - spaghetti and meat sauce

Dinner - leftover salmon, spinach, and rice

 

BP - 45 1x5

  55 1x3

  70 1x1

  82 1x5--5RM PR

  82 5x3

  60 2x8--DB

  60 1x6--failure on 7

 

Welp, This was a day. Mike's granddad died around midday, and this created some issues, as you might imagine. I did not do Aikido, because between not knowing where to be and the fact that our 3 month drought decided to end with a windstorm and a 2 hour commute home that should have taken half that, there was no right answer here. Got home super late, showered, ate, and sat in bed watching Christmas cartoons, as one does when desperately trying to destress. I have a package that needs returning because ass hole family member doesn't deserve it, and the return process is an utter PITA despite my having not opened the box SIGH.

 

I did not have the world's biggest appetite, but I did the best I could. Hopefully that gets better.

       

[shaar]

Oh jeez.  You guys are surely having a time.

 

Hang in there and please keep us posted on how you're handling things.  <3

[ixaera]

<3

 

when life sends a windstorm you roll with the punches and get up swinging, but you always seem to. Here's hoping stuff gets through the hard parts soon.

 

#badanalogybuthopefullyyougetthedrift

[Dagger]

Also sending some love, <3

[Urgan]

11/29/2016

Nope, still looks like BS from this angle

 

Lunch - yet MORE spaghetti and meat sauce

Dinner - Kill City Chili

 

Rest day. We got word on the funeral plans, and had the semi-annual formal wear fitting extravaganza. Work was a frenzy of Special. At least we got enough food fixed that we can get through the week without worrying if we're gonna starve. Sorry all you peeps who commented and I totally ignored you by accident. Fail.

 

21 hours ago, shaar said:

Oh jeez.  You guys are surely having a time.

 

Hang in there and please keep us posted on how you're handling things.  <3

 

19 hours ago, ixaera said:

<3

 

when life sends a windstorm you roll with the punches and get up swinging, but you always seem to. Here's hoping stuff gets through the hard parts soon.

 

#badanalogybuthopefullyyougetthedrift

 

18 hours ago, Dagger said:

Also sending some love, <3

 

Thanks, I think I'm doing more to stress myself out expecting to get all kinds of things done that I have no business trying to cram in this week.

[RedStone]

13 hours ago, Urgan said:

I think I'm doing more to stress myself out expecting to get all kinds of things done that I have no business trying to cram in this week.

 

One of the toughest things to let go of, especially when we need it the most. <3 <3 <3 and hugs to you and yours. Take it easy on yourself, all the things will be there when it's time to get back to them.

[miss_marissa]

Haven't been around here in like 2 months and figured I'd drop in.

 

Sorry to hear about the sad news. Mr. J grandmother also passed over the weekend so I'm in the same boat as you. Here is sympathy internet hugz <3

 

[Urgan]

11/30/2016 + 12/1/2016

Stress: Special Delivery

 

Lunch - Eggroll in a Bowl ; Cracker Barrel chicken tenders + green beans + fried okra + pintos

Dinner - Chick-fil-a nuggets + fries ; ???

 

Squats - 45 1x5

              105 1x3

              135 1x1

              155 5x3

DB Row - 25 3x10

 

I repeated last Wednesday's session because of Saturday's Fail. It felt okay, a little harder than it would around 2PM, sigh. Rows were straightforward. In a couple weeks, I might be able to increase the weight there. Not too much to say about these days, work-wise, I went to Aikido after work and felt somewhat halfway energetic enough to not be annoyed that it was ukemi day. Sensei cut her hair really, really short (think Justin Beiber * shudder * )....it makes me sad, she had nice long hair before. Ah well, I can understand getting sick of caring for it, I guess....

 

 We warmed up with strikes, of all things. Shomenuchi (overhead), yokomenuichi (overhead from the side) and munetsuki (straight forward). Yeah, it's still an Aikido class, lol. Then we did shomenuchi kokyunage. 

 

Lots of sleep was had. We did the funeral today and it took up the lion's share of the day. Consequently, not much food happened. It was as good as a funeral could be, cold and clear weather. Immediately afterward we got dinner, about 30 minutes before sundown, SIGH. Screwed up meal schedule is screwed up. Oh well. I'm not nearly as upset about life in general on this side of the funeral. I mailed a package someone bought from me on eBay, got the return package ready for its debut with FedEx, I hope i can survive the day with enough energy to enjoy the chiro session. I may or may not be able to do groceries tomorrow, we'll see. All I have to do is survive. My food has been all over the place, I definitely noticed my appetite dipped earlier in the week, so you know I'm not just being a whiny little shit about everything lol. I may have to lower the bar again in MFP and gradually build back up, 2500-2600 on average is NOT happening this week, and it may take a little while to get back there. I am doing the best I can to eat enough to keep going as strong as possible. A PR attempt is still on for tomorrow.....

 

22 hours ago, RedStone said:

 

One of the toughest things to let go of, especially when we need it the most. <3 <3 <3 and hugs to you and yours. Take it easy on yourself, all the things will be there when it's time to get back to them.

 

It is hard, and I stupidly get really wound up over returns? Is that a thing other people do or is that just me? Thanks, I decided to broom a couple of my expectations and I feel a lot better about everything at this point. 

 

8 hours ago, miss_marissa said:

Haven't been around here in like 2 months and figured I'd drop in.

 

Sorry to hear about the sad news. Mr. J grandmother also passed over the weekend so I'm in the same boat as you. Here is sympathy internet hugz <3

 

 

Thanks, it's never easy losing someone, even if it doesn't affect you directly. Your support means a lot to me and MIke.

[ixaera]

Liking for efforts and stress-respecting, not for the yucks, of course

 

14 minutes ago, Urgan said:

Sensei cut her hair really, really short (think Justin Beiber * shudder * )....it makes me sad, she had nice long hair before. Ah well, I can understand getting sick of caring for it, I guess....

 

I often wish I could have long awesome hair. Alas, cursed with the ultra-fine, somewhat thin hair thing all my life. If it's much past my shoulders, it's gonna be stringy unless I spend half the day combing it. Like, did the wind blow a little bit? Brb, gotta go brush.

[Urgan]

38 minutes ago, ixaera said:

Liking for efforts and stress-respecting, not for the yucks, of course

 

 

I often wish I could have long awesome hair. Alas, cursed with the ultra-fine, somewhat thin hair thing all my life. If it's much past my shoulders, it's gonna be stringy unless I spend half the day combing it. Like, did the wind blow a little bit? Brb, gotta go brush.

 

Stress kills and maims. It does terrible things if you insist on clinging to it, but it can't do a damn thing to you if you figure out a way to cut it into little manageable pieces. Sounds easy, I know....

 

Yeah, hair is stupid. I with my hair were thicker. It doesn't want to hold so much as a wave past a certain length on me, either--short hair all the way on me.