*You hear a rustling in the forest.*

[Pathfinder]

*Peeks out* *Waves Timidly.* Hi.

 

Disclaimer: I'm actually pretty shy. It took me forever to figure out that was why I have a hard time posting on the forums. I don't act shy anymore - Rebels who have met me out in the IRL will probably be surprised to hear that. It's just that I was trained as a kid to be outgoing, and have always been afraid that being reserved in public would be viewed as being rude. But I never really got comfortable with being vocal. So it might take me a while to get used to posting regularly (or not take at all).

 

Anyways, here goes nothing.

 

 

From the Rebellion's Respawn Guide, there are four key components to a respawn. I'm going to take my respawning cues from there.

 

First, Be Selfish.

 

Our Fearless Leader says to dedicate yourself to health for the next two weeks, as much as possible. That might prove difficult for me, because I'm trying to save up leave so that I can take an EMT class in July. This means I'm working at least 8 hours of overtime a week as "compensatory time." I'm also a member of a distance sailing team that's gearing up for its first official race. But short of scaling back on work, I should be able to make healthier choices, especially if I decide that I won't take on any social commitments and use the time for recovery instead.

 

Second, Use Buffs. In the Rebellion's Buff Guide, they come in different flavors: mercenaries, potions, armor upgrades, group improvements, weapons upgrades, ect.)

 

In case you're wondering, that's you guys (Allies). I'm planning on updating here, unless a topic is too sensitive (read: "before" pictures), in which case I'll post on the Women's Facebook page. I'm hoping the added accountability will help me stay on track.

 

I'm also going to equip some potions. Namely, I'm going to start carrying my two liter-sized bottles of water. I can fill them up with water or (herbal!) tea in the morning, and no matter where I go I'll have a day's worth of hydration with me.

 

I'm actually going to reverse one aspect of the Guide - instead of improving my inventory, I'm going to do an inventory dump. As I notice things I don't need anymore, I'm going to put them aside to be returned or donated. With less clutter in the way, I'll be able to focus more on my health.

 

Third, Attack the Problem Differently.

 

You'll notice this time around, there are no superhero analogies. It turns out that comparing myself to my fictional heroes got really toxic for me, so I'm not going anywhere near that for now. This challenge, and likely my next few challenges, won't be themed. I'm still trying to figure out who I am. So my new attack vector is to be open and honest with you guys and with myself.

 

And finally, Pick ONE Thing, and Get Started.

 

Since Steve lists the Academy as a structured way to respawn, I'll start by working through some of the quests there. I'm going to start working on the Mindset coursework tonight.

 

*Whew*, ok, bye.

 

[Cephalopod_Dreams]

Hey sweetie,  I saw your post on the NF Women's FB page so I wanted to drop in and say hi! I'll be following your respawn so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you. 

[Evicious]

You have a great plan!  Remember, you don't have to post any more frequently or in greater detail than you feel comfortable doing. Something as simple as "Sailing practice, 1 hr" or "7,053 steps" or "Had a great day today; time to hit the hay!" can help you keep track. It's your DBL; you write it how you want.  

[Pathfinder]

So, I haven't exactly been going great guns so far. I'm realizing exactly how much energy overtime pulls. I did a pretty great job the first night - I took a bath with Epsom salts, and ordered dinner from Jimmy Johns to make sure I ate. I also set up a bucket to put stuff in that I'm going to figure out how to get rid of, so that when I decide I don't need something I can immediately set it aside for donation. I went to bed early and let myself sleep in, and I bought lunch for myself when I forgot to bring anything to work.

 

I mention buying food because my reaction to stress is to stop eating, or to eat just for calories. As a reactive hypoglycemic, neither of these options are particularly good.

 

Last night, I didn't go to bed early, but at least I took what I had left of the evening after overtime off and showered. I was going to go to the gym to take my "before" pictures, but I only had two hours before bedtime after I got home and thought that would be cutting it close. Not to mention that my job got really physical/dirty yesterday and my body needed a break. I watched House of Cards and went to sleep.

 

I slept in this morning, which is good for me but bad for overtime. :/

 

I had Cliff bars for breakfast this morning. I could have done better if I'd gotten up earlier. I'm going to have to work on getting my sleep schedule under control so that I can have... less panicked... mornings. But I bought a frozen meal with meat and veggies for lunch and plan on eating dinner at home before sailing practice. Tonight is a practice race for my distance sailing team.

[Evicious]

You're doing fine! Overtime is killer; cut yourself slack where you need it, and keep moving forward as best you can.

 

[Pathfinder]

Hello, Khajjiit. :3

[Pathfinder]

I've retconned. I'm going back to Level 1 (or 0) on everything (Forum, Rebel, and Academy levels) to give myself a fresh start and a blank slate. I've always thought beginnings felt so hopeful - it might be time for one.

 

The only place I'm keeping track of everything is my signature, so I've overhauled that to reflect my Complete Respawn.

[Pathfinder]

So yesterday I was out *really* late with my sailing crew, so I'm running on maybe seven hours of mediocre sleep. But I started today with a bottle of water, which seemed to help, and my plans miraculously fell through for after overtime today so I'm going to go to the gym and then make some food.

 

Tomorrow will be easier - I'm doing some morning overtime, but then taking sick leave half way through the afternoon to go to my physical therapy appointment and run my car into the shop. I'm buying one of my coworkers a beer when work gets out (which could be cool and we become friends, or it could end up with him saying he likes me and me burning the bridge with gasoline and running in the other direction - it seems to be my M.O.). Regardless, I should be home and without plans for most of the evening, so I can relax. :3

 

I'm going to reevaluate my overtime plans today to see if I can make my schedule a little bit easier without giving up on my EMT class.

[Evicious]

Glad to hear you're getting some time to relax today! Definitely take full advantage of it - tea, candlelit bath, Netflix Parks & Rec/Brickleberry/whathaveyou, apples and caramel dip... you get the idea.  

[Pathfinder]

So the stress level bumped at work, but in a good way. I'm suddenly the most senior engineer on my project (because everyone else is on leave or travel). Sometimes it's so busy I literally have to remind myself to breathe, but it's really fun to stretch my wings and take the project for a test drive.  

 

I had this evening off, but I agreed to dinner with a friend. We're keeping it low-key, so that's good. And it'll give me an opportunity to escape and rant if my beer plans turn into an accidental date.

 

Last night I legit took the night off after work. I got back into Prison Break and watched a couple episodes while eating Cheerios in bed.

 

I'm working the weekend, and I'm doing an Escape Room tomorrow and sailing practice on Sunday. I have Monday off. I'm not letting anything touch my Monday. It will be the greatest day of sleep and Netflix ever known to man. I might even get around to cooking.

[Pathfinder]

Oh, and today is Round 3 of dry needling, and last time my therapist started hooking the needles up to electricity. #Bucky up

 

[Pathfinder]

I hit a wall really hard today. I'm dehydrated and exhausted. Yesterday got out of hand - not in a bad way, it's just that it was legitimately bizarre and I didn't get any down time.

 

I was going to work the weekend but my boss essentially told me I needed to take a break on Sunday. I called in sick today because I wasn't needed for coverage, and told them to call me if they needed anything. I think that's a win for the first objective of a respawn - Be Selfish. 

 

Dry needling went well yesterday - I got another 9 degrees of movement out of my hip, and they say I've earned 11 "recovery points" since starting therapy, out of the 21 points needed to be discharged as a success.

 

Cue the rest of today until I crawl out of the house for a friend's birthday party:

 

[Pathfinder]

So yesterday went as planned - eating and watching Prison Break until I left for my friend's birthday party. Today I slept in until 10:30 (like, 5 hours after I usually wake up). But the sleep was awful. Like, annoying dreams where I can't see what's going on, and then waking up, then rolling over and going right back to the same dream, and waking up. 

 

 

So I think something's wrong. My first guess is dehydration, followed by stress level. Even though I took yesterday off, it's taking a while to back off from the wall I hit. I'm hoping sailing practice gets cancelled today - they're talking about it because we're about to hit hurricane season in a big way where I'm at. But it would give me a chance to rehydrate and relax before I had to do anything. I might call in sick anyways. I don't really want to be out in the sun if I think I'm dehydrated.

 

The tentative plan for today is to order foodstuffs on Amazon Now and rehydrate, then maybe go see Civil War tonight with a friend. While rehydrating I'll probably stress-clean things, because I'm so ticked off after hours of not being able to see in my dreams that I'm ready to fix things. >.<

 

 

I've successfully fought off all plans for tomorrow, so that will be the grand day of adulting and recovery. 

 

And I literally just got the text that sailing is cancelled. *Whew,* time to recover.

[Pathfinder]

So I slept until I actually felt rested, which was another three hours. I backed out of the movie tonight because I feel like I should focus on feeling better. 

[travis1221]

It takes courage and strong will to back out of something I want to watch. Usually, I'm unable to do that, so you skipping Civil War is a big step. I respect that. I wish that I could stop myself after coming back from office to watch "The Office" on my laptop and it has disrupted my routine since I stay awake late at night. I literally keep watching till my ciliary muscles give up, it is not only detrimental to my health but to my productivity as well, yet I don't think I'll be able to stop myself from watching another half a dozen episodes today.

[Pathfinder]

I drank three liters of water yesterday, and ate a bunch of food. I'm feeling somewhat better, but the headache isn't gone. I'm suspecting allergies - they've gotten really bad for everyone where I live lately. I'm going to go back on Sudafed today, and aim to drink another 3L of water.

 

I got a scale yesterday, so stay tuned for measurements.

 

@travis1221, I'd try putting the computer someplace far away and doing a replacement activity like reading. But I've been binging Prison Break so I don't have much of a leg to stand on. ;b

[travis1221]

Ahhh prison break, used to binge watch it in college. 

Spoiler Alert: Goes downhill after season 1 (IMO), Season 3 was particularly bad.

[Pathfinder]

Drank 1L yesterday, deleted/archived 3000+ emails.

 

@travis1221 Noooooo. I'm on Season 2 and it's pretty good. They're finding ways to keep the tension up, and I like seeing Michael out of his element. Every two episodes or so, Lincoln is like "I'm not following your plan, bro" and Michael freaks out. Did you know they're rebooting? The first season is supposed to come out next year.

 

 

[travis1221]

I thought the reboot was supposed to be a miniseries. Prison Break was technically the first series I binge watched, so I'm looking forward to the reboot.

Kudos on those deleted mails.

[Pathfinder]

So, yesterday I completed my 3L, which puts me back on Day 2 of the Academy water challenge today. I also tried to eat healthy (Caesar salad and a blood detox smoothie for dinner), and I finally watched Civil War. Unfortunately that means I'm short on sleep this morning.

 

Today is sailing practice. There's also a blood drive at work, so I'm going to go and see if my iron's high enough this time (it hardly ever is). Tomorrow I'm backing out of Day 1 of partying for the sailing race this weekend because I'm going to need the sleep.

 

I'm in blatant violation of Goal 1 (Be Selfish) by donating blood today. I could probably use that pint of blood, and I'm definitely already low on energy. But I'm a sucker for playing the hero and there's a blood shortage in my area. Besides, I'm enjoying the opportunity to spite Red Cross by donating to another group - they've been trying to get me to come in with a persistence that falls just short of phone harassment.

 

Goal 2 (Buffs) is going well, because I've been keeping a health potion (water) on hand at all times. I noticed a marked difference today, because my allergies were a little bit better this morning.

 

Goal 3 (New Attack Vector) is... fine, I guess? I'm fighting the urge to fly into a themed challenge after watching Civil War last night, but I haven't redecorated my log yet, so I guess there's that.

 

And focusing on working through The Academy is doing ok. I've run into a minor obstacle. At the doctor's office, I weigh between 150 and 160. I ordered a scale off of Amazon and it says I weigh 174. I'm going to check on the scale at work before I go home today (complete with steel toes and all) and see what it reads. If it's below 165 I'm sending that scale back.

[Pathfinder]

Never mind, iron count is 11.9. No blood donation for me today. The internet says to eat a high-iron diet and wait four weeks. I think I'm going to go back on my multivitamin and immune booster and see if that helps.

 

I told my skipper I'm not coming to practice this evening because I have to take care of stuff around the house. She was understanding. The rest of the work day was an uphill struggle against an anxiety attack, the official feeling of "you're hitting the wall again." I'm going to relax this evening and see if I can make a plan to stop hugging the wall.

[green eggs]

On ‎24‎.‎05‎.‎2016 at 0:04 AM, Pathfinder said:

From the Rebellion's Respawn Guide,

 

There's a respown guide? < raises an eyebrow and goes off to look >

[Evicious]

My iron count normally borders on anemic; I've been able to give blood exactly once in my entire life, and then only on the third try and after consuming an iron pill every hour on the hour for 24 hours straight (yes, that means I woke myself up every hour through the night to take it - no, it was not a good idea). I've since resigned myself to the tasty fate of consistent beef, seafood and spinach (or kale, or other dark leafy greens) in my meals at least 3x a week. I love all those things, though, so I have zero complaints.  Steak can get expensive, but ground beef isn't too pricey and I love the ease of pot roasts - plus, I'll eat sardines and oysters straight out of the tin (I <3 seafood). If I'm having a really sluggish day, a can of spinach will usually perk me right up. Plus, spinach salad is just tastier than one made with boring ol' iceberg or romaine lettuce.

 

I still can't give blood, which makes me sad... but then I remember that giving blood is just one way out of literally thousands that I can be a useful member of society. Soup kitchens, Candy Stripers, mentoring programs, animal shelters, environmental groups... hell, even just donating my old clothes and shoes to Goodwill makes a difference to someone. Ok, so I don't get cookies and juice after doing most of those things - but if that's the only reason I'm donating, I probably have bigger issues than a low iron count.  

[Pathfinder]

I'm back, with a bruised ego from falling off the wagon and a second degree sunburn from sailing this weekend.

 

But the guys at work are being cool. I was afraid to come back because I thought they'd give me hell about the sunburn nonstop - it's pretty bad, with patches where my sunglasses and gloves are -  but I just got a "That's awesome, you look like a raccoon."

 

 

... But seriously, can that be my nickname?

 

The main focus this week is hydration. I'm pretty dehydrated from my sunburn, so it'll be important to get back to 3L a day.

 

My goal for work today is just to make it to quitting time without taking off or having to go to the dispensary. Pictures of the raccoon burn to follow.

[Pathfinder]

I spent half of yesterday in the ER because I was feeling sick, and the doctor told me to seek help if I started seeing dehydration symptoms. It turned out to be nothing serious.

 

As of today I still have sensitive eyes and nausea, so I'm going to try to take leave again today. I'm not sure if I have any sick leave left, but I need a day to focus on drinking water and resting my eyes.