In Which Sarah Barr Treads Very Carefully (Challenge 19)

[Sarah Barr]

This month's theme, because my challenge might be a bit grim for me, is "Things I Like". By which I mean "Sea life".

 

I've been developing binge/purge habits that scare me and I need to break them before they get worse. 

 

So instead of a restrictive diet starring calorie counting or emphasis on particular food groups, which do usually work for me, but have been difficult recently in that they trigger huge surges of guilt when I fall off the wagon, I'm following the set-up below until I can discuss things with a qualified therapist (which I am seeking out):

 

 

Goal 1: Start to make peace with your inner tiger shark. 

(The model's name is Hannah Fraser. She is good. But I neither condone nor recommend titting about with tiger sharks.)

 

Tiger sharks are renowned as dustbins of the sea, and have been found eating things like, well, dustbins. And fishing floats. And license plates. And everything. They cope with this by then everting their stomachs to get rid of the things that aren't actually food. I am going to start working on not eating like a tiger shark.

- 5 portions of freggies a day

- 1.5 litres of water a day

- Whatever I eat needs to stay eaten. This is the most important thing. 

I will try my best to have sensible, normal-person sized meals with balanced macros but points are awarded for making it through the day with all meals consumed staying that way.

 

 

Goal 2: Get thee to sword fighting

 

- As it is, I'm not ready to go back to lifting yet. 

- Instead, it's medieval combat on Sundays (we're doing long sword, hence the sailfish, and it's excellent), and yoga twice or three times a week. 

- Boyfriend's dog should be in the country next week, so taking the Fluffy Floofy One (or even the dog) for a walk will be a good way to get some more fresh air in, too.  

 

 

Goal 3: Keep busy in non-stressful ways

Saturdays I have reserved as for me alone on my schedule (I moved food prep to Sunday mornings). If it is raining, I do some messy crafting, and if it is sunny, I go to a beach and do some beach cleaning. Both of those things feel good to me, as does seeing this little harp seal pup have a snooze. 

 

 

Goal 4: Writing

Get a rough draft of a ten minute play adaptation of Sir Gawain and the Great White Green Knight finished, then fine tune. I'm about halfway there already so I can plod away at this a couple of lunchtimes a week without doing my nut in. 

 

 

 

No points system this time, but I will be tracking my food related goals on my calendar. 

 

 

Bonus:

 

[deftona]

Following along Sarah, here to cheer harder than you ever thought possible for all the shit you're dealing with right now. 

 

5 minutes ago, Sarah Barr said:

 the Fluffy Floofy One

 

Please let this become a thing. 

[LadyWitch]

I'm glad that you're taking this challenge to improve your relationship with food. And doubly glad that you're looking for help. Admitting that there's a problem, and then finding help for it, are two of the hardest things I know. So GO YOU!

 

I love all things sea related! Especially dolphins, whales and sharks! Although that baby seal may just have made my day

[Sylvaa]

Thank you for being brave enough to share what you are going through. It's so wonderful that you recognize your behavior as detrimental and are taking steps to change it. 

 

I'm cheering for you!

 

[Sarah Barr]

White tip reef shark cuddle puddle for you guys:

 

 

<3

[SomeGuyFromScotland]

Much like Def, I also came to go harder. Woot. Etc.

[Shello]

I'm here too!  You've got a smart challenge.  I'm here to cheer you on and have your back.  

 

[Terah]

You've put together a very well thought out challenge. 

Sending you nice, cuddly fish

 

[gryffinkat]

Love your goals and your theme. And I totally love the idea of Sir Gawain and the Great White. I think you need to write that version.  I also have some writing goals this month, so I'll be cheering for you, in that and everything else as well.

 

Meanwhile, enjoy this adorable fishy:

 

[Sarah Barr]

Update:

 

On track with everything so far. 

 

Today's not-technically sea creature: the Baikal Seal (Pusa sibirica)

(I'll add a new sea creature with every update!)

 

This small and blorpy seal, also called the nerpa, lives only in Lake Baikal, Russia. Lake Baikal, while not the largest freshwater lake by surface area, is the largest in the world by volume, containing more water than all the North American great lakes combined. The Baikal seal has no natural predators (apart from the occasional snack attack by brown bears), and they seem to make up for this by being jerks to each other, like the seals above. They're around 70kg, or my target weight, and they are the only seal in the world that lives exclusively in fresh water. 

 

 

Song that is currently stuck in my head:

Oh, that is a big image. The film it's from (Song of the Sea) is adorable and very prettily animated.

 

 

[Sarah Barr]

Update:

 

All on track except the freggies for yesterday, remedying that for today with some kind of smoothie. Today I'm learning about the dinosaur-bird link, or at least, I am listening to lectures on it in the background while I skim articles on Buzzfeed, but that counts, right?

 

Today's Sea Creature: Risso's Dolphin (Grampus griseus)

 

(IT IS SO PRETTY)

 

Weighing up to 500kg, this is the largest species of dolphin that is referred to as a dolphin in its name (the Killer Whale is the largest of all dolphins). They're quite scarred creatures, particularly as they get older, and the scars are usually from either fights with other Risso's dolphins, or from squid, their favourite kind of prey. 

 

 

Song in my head today:

 

 

 

[Shello]

3 hours ago, Sarah Barr said:

 

Song in my head today:

 

 

 

 

I haven't heard this song in forever.  Thanks for sharing it. 

 

I'm glad things are going smoothly

[Sarah Barr]

Update:

Still on track except for freggies, because I found myself holding a mocha frap instead of a berry smoothie, because I went to Starbucks like a big sausage. TODAY I will get my freggies. Esp. since I am making vegetable lasagne tonight. It'll be good. 

 

Today's marine animal: Common Skate (Dipturus batis)

 

(Source: The Shark Trust)

 

And although I don't really like posting pictures of critically endangered animals being fished, I wanted to get across how big these skates can get:

That's a 208lb/94kg skate. Don't worry, it was released back into the sea. (Source: Daily Mirror)

 

The common or flapper skate can live from 20-100 years, and like all skates, is a relative of sharks and rays. It has rows of thorns along its tail, and unusually among skates, it is active during both day and night. It feeds mostly on crustaceans, ray-finned fishes, and other skates. Its habitat range is in the North East Atlantic, all the way from the tip of Norway and Iceland to Morocco and Senegal. In the British Isles, it can mostly be found on soft substrates along the coasts bordering the Celtic sea and the west coast of Great Britain. They lay leathery eggs ("Mermaid's purses"), like many sharks and rays, and common skate egg cases are enormous. Eggcases from various sharks, skates, and rays can be found washed up on coasts around the UK, and you can go recording them as part of the Shark Trust's Great Eggcase Hunt (more details here).

 

(Mounting soapbox.

Since they're very large (and that skate above was apparently the biggest one ever caught in UK waters), catch-and-release sport fishing of skates is very popular, despite it having been listed as Endangered on the IUCN red list since 2000, and critically endangered since 2006. However, there is growing evidence to suggest that catch-and-release fishing of some elasmobranchs (sharks, skates, rays) is a lot more damaging than previously thought - this is very apparent in hammerhead sharks - there can be a build up of stress hormones that reaches damaging levels during struggles on a line that can result in mortality after it has been released and swims away in a "healthy"-looking state. So while I'm not saying that this is the case at all with the common skate, I'd love to see a world where we cut the line whenever we realised we had a shark, ray or skate hooked on the other end,.

Dismounting soapbox. Skates are cool.)

 

Happy Flatshark Friday! (That is a thing. I follow too many shark groups on Facebook.)

 

 

Song stuck in my head today:

 

 

I'm sorry. But that chorus, though. At least I didn't post that Starship song.

[Terah]

35 minutes ago, Sarah Barr said:

I am making vegetable lasagne tonight

That sounds delicious!

 

I love the shark-talk, and I love the music you've got stuck in your head

 

[SomeGuyFromScotland]

Blorpy is my new favourite word.

[deftona]

Mermaid's purse is my new favourite euphemism

[SomeGuyFromScotland]

13 minutes ago, deftona said:

Mermaid's purse is my new favourite euphemism

 

Would totally put all my "loose change" in.

[Sarah Barr]

Update:

 

Had a slip up on Saturday, and after that slip up I almost immediately binged again, but I managed to keep it down the second time.

 

Haven't B/P-ed since then. I found out I really messed up at work today - I checked dates our clients had said they'd be on holiday but forgot to check dates that are national holidays in their countries and our schedule got screwed over because of it. I spent the bus ride home thinking of mint chocolate chip ice cream and calling myself retrospectively-undeserved names, and I did get as far as eating mint chocolate chip ice cream but I made sure I only had a sensible portion. 

Stress does seem to be a big part of it. I've knocked firespinning off my schedule, since while it is fun, it is also at 9pm on Monday nights and it is important to get sleep. The Fluffy One says he'll teach me some moves at a reasonable hour tomorrow, though, so I'll still get to learn. 

 

Freggies still not really on track, but I'm getting there. Self-care tonight is an early night, going to bed after I post this. Water on track. 

 

 

Creature Feature: The Firefly Squid (Watasenia scintillans)

Shiny, cap'n. 

 

A bioluminescent and apparently rather delicious (serve as sashimi) three-inch long squid found in the western Pacific ocean.

 

The bioluminescence serves a couple of purposes at least - one, photophores (light-producing organs, and in marine animals these are usually sacs stuffed with bioluminescent bacterial hostages) on the ends of their tentacles flash and attract prey fish. (Bonus fact: squid have eight arms and two tentacles. Tentacles are the long ones with the suckered clubs on the end, arms are shorter and generally have suckers all the way along. Poodlypoodlypoodly.)

 

Two, the light can act as a camouflage pattern. Look at the squid in that gif - they're very conspicuous against the inky black murk, right? Correct, but now imagine you are looking up at the squid, instead of down - when they're high enough in the water column that sunlight gets through, the squid can adjust their levels of luminescence so they colour-match the blue, sky-lit water well enough that they become practically invisible, or at least a nightmare to pick out from a huge shoal of other firefly squid. 

 

 

Song stuck in my head today:

 

 

 

[Terah]

The wanting to binch after I feel I have screwed up is very recognizable. Well done on not  going on a full binch!

 

And I love your sea life stories

[Shello]

Great job stopping the cycle and recognizing the trigger.  You can do this. 

[SomeGuyFromScotland]

Hey, Mrs. Hopefully all is well.

[Sarah Barr]

1 hour ago, SomeGuyFromScotland said:

Hey, Mrs. Hopefully all is well.

 

Thankyou for checking on me, I'd forgotten to post!

 

All is well, everything's on track and no B/P at all. I think the fact that I can relax about what food choices I'm making a bit is helping a lot. I'm at the point now where I think I could go back to lifting without fear I'd push myself into an eating danger zone. I will give it a little more time just to cement things, but next challenge I shall lift again. 

 

I met my boyfriend's dog yesterday! She arrived in Edinburgh on Saturday and she is part husky, part... something shepherd, and possibly part octopus as she is a complete pretzel half the time. Very sweet, and starting to get the hang of training. She's a six month old shelter dog, it's not clear whether she's had any training at all before, but she now knows the commands for "sit" and "no". 

 

No marine creature with this update just yet because I'm at work but probably later today you shall get info on the minke whale!

 

(Next week's facts will be shark heavy because it's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year. I love shark week.)

[deftona]

6 minutes ago, Sarah Barr said:

I met my boyfriend's dog yesterday! She arrived in Edinburgh on Saturday and she is part husky, part... something shepherd, and possibly part octopus as she is a complete pretzel half the time. Very sweet, and starting to get the hang of training. She's a six month old shelter dog, it's not clear whether she's had any training at all before, but she now knows the commands for "sit" and "no". 

 

Do we get doggy pictures?  

 

6 minutes ago, Sarah Barr said:

I love shark week.

 

Said no woman, ever. But I guess the real shark week is ok  

 

Glad to hear you're doing well Sarah! 

[SomeGuyFromScotland]

1 hour ago, Sarah Barr said:

 

 it's not clear whether she's had any training at all before, but she now knows the commands for "sit" and "no". 

 

 

SWFS is still patiently trying to teach me these.

 

Glad you're back. Your wordsmithery always tickles my assorted bones.

[Sarah Barr]

2 hours ago, deftona said:

 

Do we get doggy pictures?  

If this link works, then yes! If not, then also yes, but later in the week when I have a chance to take one myself!

I'm sure she's mostly German shepherd. 

 

Right, I have free time, minke whales! (Balaenoptera acutorostrata)

 

The smallest of the baleen whales to be found along UK shores, the minke grows to 7-10m long, and eats small fish and plankton. Known colloquially as the stinke whale amongst people who have come across not-so-recently stranded animals.* Found globally - one of the prime targets for "scientific" whalers (I will not direct any more derisiveness towards the whalers I'm referring to, or I will never stop, because I hate their guts) in the southern ocean. Can be seen feeding with a technique called "lunge feeding", which is demonstrated not-that-excellently by this Bryde's (broo-da's) whale (a much larger species of baleen whale) who has managed to miss most of those sardines. What an eejit. 

 

 

Minkes can also breach (launch themselves completely out of the water), and like many kinds of whale, can be identified right up to individual whales by the pattern of their markings and scars. (You can see a photo ID gallery of Hebridean minke whales here, along with their highly inventive names, if you're interested: http://www.whaledolphintrust.co.uk/research-photo-identification-gallery.asp?gallery_id=12)

 

 

*Story time: When I was a little human female growing up in the Hebrides, sometimes we'd get told when dead whales washed up on the beach, so our primary school (elementary school) could grab clipboards and measuring tape and generally be gross and do gross things and draw gross drawings around a deceased cetacean. Sometimes they'd be fairly fresh, other times, er, not so. Once, we went to see a whale washed up near the RSPB (Royal Society for something about the Protection of Birds) reserve. A buzzard or some other bird of prey frequented that reserve, and took great advantage of the absurdly large rabbit population on the island. Since there were so many, the bird'd just eat the nicest bit and leave most of the rest of the rabbit lying about in the summer sun. So prolific a hunter was this bird that in places there was a carpet of most-of-rabbits, and the area got called the Rabbit Heaven Dunes (like in the Katie Morag books). This whale honked so atrociously in the June sun that we sought nasal sanctuary in the rabbit heaven dunes. 

 

Song stuck in my head today: