Agnarr: A Beast I Am

[Agnarr]

This chapter follows the time line of The Legend of a Banished Man. The wolf-warrior has survived the fight against Rurik, the immortal, but the injury he suffered has affected his shape-shifting.

A Beast I Am

 

The man was sitting beside the fire, carefully honing the edge of a broken seax with a small whetstone. Somehow tip had broken off inside the hunter’s ribcage taking the first rune of the engraving with it. His brother’s seax… now instead of “RAGNAR” the engraving spelled “AGNAR”

“Agnarr…  one who inspires awe”, he translated. “Not a bad name either”

Once the blade was razor sharp he sheathed it but kept it close, there shouldn’t be anybody around, but one could never be sure. His mind drifted towards his last fight, the one he had with the hunter named Rurik in those woods. He unconsciously touched the scar left by the hunter’s axe on his chest… the only scar he’s ever had since he took his oath and turned for the first time.

And since the encounter with Rurik his transformation lasted less and less. He even felt, slower, weaker; his senses duller.

“Am I losing it? Ragnar is dead, Njal is dead; they are all dead. If I can’t turn my clan dies with my inner wolf”, He thought to himself “I need to recover my true form”. That’s how the brothers referred to their animal form.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound horses. Four men rode to his small fire, all wearing richly embroidered tunics, rings and necklaces.

“Good evening kinsman”, the youngest of them greeted ”My men and I are scouting the lands of the Jarl, my father, in search of a poacher who’s been killing the animals that by right belong to my father. You'll tell me your name and reason to be out here alone, at once"

"Of course, milord. Agnarr is my name", it was the first name that came to his head, of course he wouldn't tell his real name to those people. "And I'm just making a stop on my way to the market. I'll leave at dawn's first light, I swear" he tried to sound as simple and honest as he could.

"And may I ask what you inted to sell at the market? I see no goods around here" the young nouble asked.

"Damn it" thought Agnarr "I'm getting bored of this lad"

"I'm the merchandize, sire! I sing for the noble, merchants and beggars alike. Would milord want to hear a tune?”, Agnarr took a risk for he was no singer, but he knew the noble man would be disgusted at a street troubadour.

“Ugh. Gods, no!”  he turned to his men “let’s go, there’s no point on searching in the dark”.

“And you”. He looked at Agnarr. ” I want you out by sunrise”

“Sure thing, milord!” the fake accommodating tone wasn’t very convincing, but the men were already on their way to the Jarl’s homestead.           Of course he didn’t intended to visit the market at all, but leaving at sunrise seemed to be the smartest choice. He wrapped his cloak around him and fell asleep right there on the ground.

In his dream, Ragnar called him but the warrior’s feet were slow and every step was a struggle, like he was submerged knee-deep in honey.

“C’mon little brother, hurry up! Run, don’t let him get you” Ragnar kept on calling

Agnarr looked over his shoulder and saw a horrible monster, made out of black smoke; with a thousand red eyes, chasing after him.

“Brother, help!” he tried to run faster, but it was of no use.

“What are you doing?  Turn to your true form!” , Ragnar’s voice echoed inside his skull.           

“I can’t!” suddenly he was a boy again. The monster started to take form: now it had only two eyes of fire and the shape of a bearded man wielding a ludicrously big double-bitted axe.

“Of course you can! The animal is inside of you, let it out!” Ragnar now spoke with Njal’s voice. It’s funny how dreams mix and mangle our memories, yet they seem alright at the moment. “Feel its growls, hear it howl and let it out damn it!” Njal’s voice filled his head like a sea storm. Agnarr’s heart was pounding so fast he thought it would explode. Right when it seemed that actually would happen, he turned: his growls louder and wilder than ever; the claws and fangs sharp as damascus steel blades. The transformed warrior turned to the monster in the shape of a man and slashed its face with a powerful strike of his claws. The monster let out a terrible scream and before it could re-build it took another claw to the gut. The monster seemed defeated; Agnarr raised another claw. As he went in for the killing blow, the face of the monster took form again and Rurik’s voice sounded clear as a mountain river and loud as thunder “You filthy beast! You can’t kill me”. The smoke figure off the hunter drove his axe into the werewolf’s chest and then… the sun rose on the horizon. Agnarr found himself still wrapped in the cloak.

“That was rotten dream, if anything”, he stood up, ready to leave.

All through that day he felt different, invigorated and at the same time, like he was still dreaming. The breeze brought the smell of flowers; he could hear the squirrels on the trees, the birds taking fly. It seemed like the country had abruptly come to life.

At night he encountered a road inn, and for the first time in what seemed like years, he decided to rent a room. He traded some of his dried goods for a bed and board and spent the night sipping light ale. Around midnight, he went outside to relieve his bladder.

He was almost done when he heard a voice behind him.

“Took a while to find you. Missing your furry self, eh wolf?”.  He turned around to face and couldn’t believe his eyes: There was Rurik alive and kicking. He was not bluffing when he said it was impossible to kill him.

“How?... It cannot be! I killed you, I drove that axe of yours right into your back” Agnarr slowly reached for his seax while speaking.

“You are not the only one whose injuries disappear… except for that one that is” laughed Rurik pointing at the wolf-warrior’s chest. “how do you like my axe now?” the hunter’s laughter made Agnarr’s  blood boil. His hand grasped the seax handle. With a swift motion, he unsheathed, cleared the distance between the two and stroke across Rurik’s face with the broken seax, slashing it right open. Knowing it would heal quickly he kept on attacking; cutting and stabbing as much as he could.

“Enough!” roared the hunter, tackling the werewolf to the ground. Weapons flew through the air, leaving both combatants unarmed. They rolled on the dirt trading vicious punches until Rurik took the top and landed three haymakers on Agnarr’s face, leaving him stunned. With a grip like a vice, the hunters hands wrapped around the werewolf’s throat.

“Trust me mate, there’s no healing for asphyxiation”, Rurik said, blood staining his teeth “so you’re in for a really shitty death”.

Agnarr felt himself fainting. His heart pounded inside his chest like it was going to blow; it pounded so hard he could feel it on his head. All of a sudden, Njals voice:” The animal is inside of you, let it out!”, his vision was blurring “Feel its growls, hear it howl and let it out damn it!”.

He felt like his heart had exploded. All his muscles contracted violently, his blood boiled inside of him. He heard Rurik’s voice like it came from far, far away “what in the world?... “. Before he realized it, he was standing tall, bearing his true form. The hunter looked desperately for his axe, but the werewolf was in a rage. Claws and fangs tore the flesh of the hunter.

He turned to human form again, but this time he did it at his will. “Let’s see how you heal once I rip your heart out” he shouted at the bleeding hunter.

In the blink of an eye the scene was filed with riders bearing weapons and torches: A band of werewolf hunters.

“Look what we’ve got here” started the leader ”seize him!”.  A heavy club hit Agnarr on the back of the head, sending him groggily to the ground.

When he woke up he found himself in chains, lying on the ground where he fell. As his vision cleared he saw Rurik on horseback, his hands tied behind his back with a rope around his neck: they were executing him.

A fur bound hunter came by “wakey wakey wolf!” he was clearly drunk. “who could have thought that the fella’ you torn to shreds was mighty ole Rurik”.

A much bigger man shoved the drunk aside and crouched next to Agnarr, it was the leader of the group. “He is a drunk fool you know” that man wasn’t drunk and his tone resembled more of a scholar rather than a hunter ”but he’s right. Your ‘friend’ here is very famous. He’s the one slaying entire bands of wolves like you”

“Why are you hanging him if he’s one of yours?” Agnarr asked, trying to wobble his hands free of the chains without the man noticing

“He’s not one of us” answered the man ”he’s our enemy you see. Every wolf he kills is a bag of silver we don’t cash and this whole being immortal business makes it quite unfair, don’t you think?” The man looked rather entertained.

 “Unlike your kind who heals immediately in wolf shape, and not at all in human shape” the man explained ”our mutual acquaintance here takes a bit to heal, but he does it no matter what. That said, there are ways to kill an ‘immortal’, y’know? ripping his hear out, chopping his head off or hanging him to death. Somehow hanging won the poll” He seemed disappointed. As the man spoke, Agnarr had managed to release his left hand. The man walked away a few steps and then turned around as if he had remembered something “Oh, and don’t try to turn and brake those chains, they won’t break and the change in size will cause your bones to shatter. You are wanted alive”. 

He released his right hand off of the chains. He would have to make a run for it.

“I know I’ll regret this” he thought. As quick as he could get rid of the chains, he rushed past one of the hunters taking the sword from the man’s belt. He got to the tree where Rurik was about to hang and with a single motion hacked through the rope, then turned around and killed the first man that came at him. He took the dead man’s axe.

“Don’t make me regret this” he shouted at Rurik while cutting the rope that bound his hands. He gave him the sword and kept the axe for himself.

Rurik dismounted and split the head of the first attacker with a powerful swing of the sword. Agnarr watched as the bearded man dispatched another enemy and then turned around to face his share of foes. He spotted the leader of the band a couple meters away. It was a clear trajectory. The axe flew throw the air and sunk deep into the leader’s chest.

Bearing a smile of satisfaction Agnarr turned again with a vicious howl. The werewolf tore up enemies with his claws and fangs alike, punching them into the air and stomping them on the ground. He took a couple spears and swords to his legs and torso, but the wounds healed almost instantly.

As he slashed through the last of his foes, he searched for Rurik. Found him getting rid of the last two hunters. He had recovered his axe at some point and he was swinging it wildly, keeping the adversaries at bay. One of the hunters went for it and had the horn of the axe driven into his throat. The last one tried to surrender but a beastly blow with the axe landed on his neck, severing his head altogether.

The immortal and the werewolf stared at each other for a second, not knowing what to do.

Agnarr, was expecting Rurik to come rushing for a final stand, but the hunter calmly sheathed his weapon. The werewolf returned to his human form without losing sight of Rurik, who was taking one of the horses. Both men looked at each other one more time, nodded and parted ways.

The dust of the riding hunter was still visible when Agnarr mounted, after seizing clothing and gear from the dead hunters, heading west.

 

This is the last challenge of the Becoming Ulfhedinn series, focusing on the shapeshifting skill of the character(beast mode anyone?). While I'm 100% positive I can´t turn myself into a werewolf Companions style, that doesn't mean I can't get in and out of beast mode -more or less- at will. This challenge will be aimed at achieving this as well as "beasting" in other areas as well.

 

Goals:

- Find my inner beast:  Meditate at least 3 times a week, 10min before bed, focusing on the positive aspects of my life and myself. 

- Brains and Brawn: Study every day implementing the pomodoro technique

- Animal FORM: I realized the reason why I don't like high rep lifting for some movements is that I'm not very good at mantaining proper form. Practice form with light weight on my home gym every weekend, be it saturday or sunday.

 

Aditional beasting

- I'm gonna take up intermitent fasting again. It used to work fairly well but for some reason I stopped doing it. The idea is to fast for 16-18 hours and do my workout immediately after on CrossFit days. On non-CF days I'm deppending on Nare's shedule so the workouts will fall where they may. Of course I'm still eating paleo with 1 variance/week

 

 

I think that's all. Let's do this!

 

[Wild Wolf]

Following! It's a tough life when you can't actually BE a werewolf lol  

 

Wolf

[Volki]

Following! I look forward to seeing you go beast mode!

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Following for more Wolfen Badrangerassery

[Rurik Harrgath]

Patiently waiting for story time!

[DJtrippyT]

Hi! Following!

 

 

 

[DarK_RaideR]

Vikings don't follow, they pursue!

 

[Mr_Willes]

Here to see how things will go my SA Brother!

 

[Volki]

ohhh I didn't know you updated with the next part of the story!

Awesome addition to the story and again I look forward to seeing you going beast mode on this one!

 

Also this:

1. Because wolfs

2. eye candy and good song ;D

 

 

[Agnarr]

On 8/6/2016 at 10:38 AM, Wild Wolf said:

Following! It's a tough life when you can't actually BE a werewolf lol  

 

Wolf

true, but we cann still strive to be BEASTS

On 8/6/2016 at 11:07 AM, Volki said:

Following! I look forward to seeing you go beast mode!

 

On 8/6/2016 at 0:21 PM, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Following for more Wolfen Badrangerassery

 

On 8/6/2016 at 0:27 PM, Rurik Harrgath said:

Patiently waiting for story time!

On 9/6/2016 at 5:26 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

Vikings don't follow, they pursue!

On 9/6/2016 at 7:30 AM, mr_willes said:

Here to see how things will go my SA Brother!

On 8/6/2016 at 11:32 PM, DJtrippyT said:

Hi! Following!

Is great to have you on board guys!

 

 

 

On 11/6/2016 at 1:51 PM, Volki said:

 

 

oh, In This Moment! It's been a long time since I listened to this great great band.

 

Week 1, Day 1

The fasting went without any issues from 22:00 Sunday until 15:00 Monday. I had no energy problems whatsoever. Lunch consisted of chicken and boiled sweet potato slices.

 

Study went a-okay and doing it in blocks has helped me keep my "brain's stamina" longer: "just one more pomodoro" was almost like a mantra that allowed me to grind through half the program for the final exam. I still got plenty of time, but days go by quickly.

 

The meditation techniques I found were a little to woo-woo for me. Tried some of them but it just seemed fake. Then, lying frustrated on my bed,  I started to think about those hardcore athletes, the ones defying all odds, the firebreathers. What keeps them on going when their bodies fail? What fuels the forge in their hearts, when their systems are at the edge of shutting down? What makes them go "F*ck you!" when their brain tells them to quit? What keeps them so HUNGRY?

That reminded me of Amundsen's talk about the mental aspect of crossfit; how he felt every WOD as a ritual and his mantra ("One more rep, stronger as I go") as a prayer. The man was and still is one of the most badass mofos in CF and yet he's not Saiyan nor kriptonian; he hasn't been granted superpowers by a US gov secret experiment or any other nerd reference you could think about.

He just wanted it harder than anybody else, in his own words, he just prayed harder. And while I don't strive to match Greg's feats(yet ) I'm willing to learn from the guy. It's not that all those people are born with a wild fire inside their chests(although some of them may); they build the fire and feed it until it burns all fears and limitations. And THAT is what's keeping them hungry. I wanna be like that, and I'm going to start right now.

 

I'm not sure that counts as meditation, but I can asure you I felt struck by lightning. I wanted to go wrestle bears, kick a persian emissary into a bottomless pit and then completing Fran, just for the heck of it. And that feeling is still with me as I write this. I feel ready to face whatever the coach throws at us today. I feel ready to start walking that path; it's the same path that I've been walking and at the same tame, is always a new one. The path to a better me.

[Mr_Willes]

It's the same basic principle i use when i get tired on long runs. "I'm just gonna put my left in front of my right and next my right in front of my left and repeat until i'm at my goal". It helps a lot when you set realistic goals. Last run i did at home i actually ran the last 4K of a total of 10K this way.

 

Great to see you got a moment! Run with it!

[Volki]

Hell yeah man! Remember this feeling, when your mind starts to wander back tot he old ways steer it back to this feeling.

I am the same way, I only think about that one exercise, that one rep. Being in the moment and saying F you to the pain.

I know how you feel though and I wish I could have that fire like some of those guys. Keep it up man, one day at time

 

[DJtrippyT]

1 hour ago, Agnarr said:

I'm not sure that counts as meditation, but I can asure you I felt struck by lightning. I wanted to go wrestle bears, kick a persian emissary into a bottomless pit and then completing Fran, just for the heck of it

 

EPIC

[DarK_RaideR]

Remember, you are your own motivation

 

[Agnarr]

On 14/6/2016 at 11:27 AM, mr_willes said:

It's the same basic principle i use when i get tired on long runs. "I'm just gonna put my left in front of my right and next my right in front of my left and repeat until i'm at my goal". It helps a lot when you set realistic goals. Last run i did at home i actually ran the last 4K of a total of 10K this way.

 

Great to see you got a moment! Run with it!

I did and I'm still rolling on it!

On 14/6/2016 at 11:39 AM, Volki said:

I am the same way, I only think about that one exercise, that one rep. Being in the moment and saying F you to the pain.

It is a really powerfull way to grind through a workout

On 14/6/2016 at 0:46 PM, DJtrippyT said:

 

EPIC

17 hours ago, DarK_RaideR said:

Remember, you are your own motivation

 

ADM! Best one-man-band ever. Too bad  Tim Lambesis got his sorry ass thrown into jail.

 

Week 1, day 2 and 3

 

Tuesday WOD was epic. I arrived to the box early as always. After changing into my battle gear:a destroyed Amon Amarth sleevless tee, knock-off "adidas" shorts and cheap running shoes(I'm buying Reebok CF kicks as soon as I get my next paycheck). Watched a motivational speech video on my phone just before the coach called  forthe 14:30 class.

The WOD itself consisted of 3 back-to-back series of squat cleans, burpees and runs, increasing the number of reps and distance of the run each time. The coach told me to do the squat-cleans with 45kg. No more, no less. The workout made me beautifully miserable. Crappy technique made the cleans harder than they should have been (I still have trouble getting under the bar, so I basically power clean the thing and then do the squat) which made me realize I could do better, and I WILL do better next time. The burpees kicked my stamina in the nuts by set 2 (30 burpees). I ended up doing 20, resting for about 30sec and finishing. The same happened on round 3(40 burpees) which I splitted in 2 series of 20. I was more hyped than ever.

The cash out was

-50 lunges

-30 kick up to wall handstand.

 

Tha class consisted mostly of fellow beginners. That said, I had the 3rd fastest time for the WOD. The first two were seriously badass girls. One of them is a seasoned crossfiter and the other is a german girl who used to be a gymnast. My god, you should see that woman's free standing handstand.  Perfect form. She even handstand walked around the gym... Anyway, back to the subject!

Bottom line: I need to face EVERY WOD in the same way. 

 

Wednesday went without much to write about. Mostly practiced my pullups since Nare is a bit under the weather so we did not work out today.

Now I'm off to maditate and sleep.

 

P.S. If you are interested in CrossFit and you have not red it, do yourself a favor and pick up a copy of J.c Herz's "Learning to Breathe Fire"  Wondeful book on the subject. It's like 11 us dollars on amazon

 

 

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Good job on that WOD!

[Broba Fett]

I look forward very much to being towards the top of the leaderboard for WODs.  Well done sir.

[DarK_RaideR]

On 14/6/2016 at 5:15 PM, Agnarr said:

The meditation techniques I found were a little to woo-woo for me. Tried some of them but it just seemed fake. Then, lying frustrated on my bed,  I started to think about those hardcore athletes, the ones defying all odds, the firebreathers. What keeps them on going when their bodies fail? What fuels the forge in their hearts, when their systems are at the edge of shutting down? What makes them go "F*ck you!" when their brain tells them to quit? What keeps them so HUNGRY?

That reminded me of Amundsen's talk about the mental aspect of crossfit; how he felt every WOD as a ritual and his mantra ("One more rep, stronger as I go") as a prayer. The man was and still is one of the most badass mofos in CF and yet he's not Saiyan nor kriptonian; he hasn't been granted superpowers by a US gov secret experiment or any other nerd reference you could think about.

He just wanted it harder than anybody else, in his own words, he just prayed harder. And while I don't strive to match Greg's feats(yet ) I'm willing to learn from the guy. It's not that all those people are born with a wild fire inside their chests(although some of them may); they build the fire and feed it until it burns all fears and limitations. And THAT is what's keeping them hungry. I wanna be like that, and I'm going to start right now.

I mentioned it on my thread, but it feels relative to the above as well

Notice how Josh Bridges failing the deadlifts last year (and getting penalized for bro reps this Open) fueled his fire. It also reminds me of Sam Briggs' story when she failed to qualify, then came back next year to destroy everything.

[maegs]

Nice job on your WOD!  

[Charlie_Quinn]

Awesome work on that WOD!

[Mr_Willes]

Dude that sounds intense. At least half a year of regular gym for me, maybe after that i have to try some CF.

[Agnarr]

I've been really absent these last few days. 

 

Thurday's WOD was great, both fryiday and today(monday) were holiday... long weekend goodness. That didn't keep me from practicing my form with the small bar at home. It just long enough to grab it with a snatch grip and since I'm using very little weight it worked well(as a weighted wooden stick would have). The positive meditation thing still feels woo-woo, but it's made me realize the things I should be grateful for as well as the things I need to work on. It's still pretty much a work in progress, but I'm starting to see the point on doing it.

It's been kind of a strange father's day without my grandpa, but it was nice to get the family together.

 

I'll try to get a workout in today but study for finals has reached the red zone, lol.

[Agnarr]

Week 2 Day 2

 

Life goes on after the extra large weekend here in Argentina. 
Yesterday I did work out despite of the study-for-finals madness. I even came up with a simple WOD that included pulling, pushing and pressing as well as some cardio:

 

¤Warm-up(especially the shoulders)

¤Form and technique; first with a wooden stick, then with an empty bar, then with 2,5kg plates.

¤ Actual WOD
              ●10 pull-ups
              ●10 barbell snatches
              ●Bear walk to the punching bag (about 20m)
              ●1min sparring
              ●All out sprint back to the bar
              ●10 Thrusters
              ●Push ups

I didn't have much time so I only managed 3 rounds. That said, I was moderately thrashed after those 3 rounds, not completely thrashed like I am after the WODs at the box, but I'd still count it as a successful workout.

 

 

I never though this would happen but Argentina is going to face the US in a football (soccer) match! Gotta admit the US team has come a long way within a short period of time, considering how massive baseball and american football are up there.
I'm not much of a soccer (don't make me say that again, lol) fan, but I'll probably watch it for the lols.

 

On an assortment of random subjects:

Today I have a doctor's appointment. I hope it doesn't take much time or I won't have enough time to hit the box for a WOD before class, and with exam season so close I can't afford to skip a lesson right now.

 

I finished reading "Learning to breathe fire" last night... wow, just wow. If I liked CrossFit before, now I freaking love it. The deep research on the "between the ears" aspects of crossfit really spoke to me; and being able to relate to that from workout to workout changed the way I experience CF. Or perhaps it didn't "change" anything but just gave a name to the sense of community I experienced at the box, and to the wildness I experienced on myself when dropping under a loaded barbell or swinging a kettlebell over my head. Anyway, great book.

 

Last week a friend of mine found an article on the paleo diet and primal eating. It made perfect sense to him so he decided to give it a try for 15 days. He came to me asking for tips and my brother (who is severely overweight), upon knowing our friend was giving paleo a chance, decided to jump in! Hope they stick with it.   I'm trying not to go Jehova's witness hardcore preaching style on them, just answering their questions and sharing articles they might find interesting. For now the "fat is not poison" thing has got them in awe.

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

That's great you are inspiring those around you to be healthy, that's what the Rebellion is all about.

34 minutes ago, Agnarr said:

I'm trying not to go Jehova's witness hardcore preaching style on them,

[Agnarr]

On 17/6/2016 at 10:13 PM, maegs said:

Nice job on your WOD!  

 

On 18/6/2016 at 1:58 PM, Charlie_Quinn said:

Awesome work on that WOD!

 

On 16/6/2016 at 10:00 AM, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Good job on that WOD!

Thanks guys!

On 17/6/2016 at 8:16 AM, DarK_RaideR said:

Notice how Josh Bridges failing the deadlifts last year (and getting penalized for bro reps this Open) fueled his fire. 

Dude, Josh Bridges is THE MAN. He is not only a Navy SEAL and pretty much the 2nd fittest man on earth, but more importantly... he's got the One Stache.

One Stache to rule them all, One Stache to find them, One Stache to bring them all, and in the fitness bind them.

On 20/6/2016 at 8:42 AM, mr_willes said:

Dude that sounds intense. At least half a year of regular gym for me, maybe after that i have to try some CF.

Given your levels of badassery, I think you'll enjoy CF very much.

 

 

 

I didn't make it to CrossFit yesterday on the (sort of) bright side, the new ophthalmologyst seems to have figured out what exactly was wrong with my new glasses, which basically means I'll have to get the lenses re-done (and pay for them again T.T). 
When I arrived home I did as many pullups as I could before dinner. 
I find it easier to meditate with the lights off, without electronic distractions such as TV or smarphone around. Add to that the relaxation of the body and you have the perfect sleeping draught, lol.

 

Today is gonna be a couple-workout day and I really feel like practicing hand balancing. I sense a lot of frog stands and elbow levers in the future