Alaysia Gets Ready

[Jord]

10 hours ago, Alaysia said:

Man, thanks, guys! You're right. I need to focus on the positives, no matter how outnumbered (I think) they may be. They are the most important bits. Thank you for reminding of that! In my strop, I forgot that I think I did do a new move right.

It certainly felt right because I felt worked after it. Yay for that.

 

You did that move without falling over? You are already 20 steps ahead of me!

[Alaysia]

2 hours ago, Taddea Zhaan said:

 

You did that move without falling over? You are already 20 steps ahead of me!

 

I didn't fall over, true. But I did do a pretty good impersonation of a new born giraffe in the wobbles department.

[Alaysia]

Remember that time Lara Croft

killed Jorah

and saved the life of James Bond?

 

Family movie night and me and the kids watched Tomb Raider. I hadn't seen that movie since I was kid! (19 counts as a kid.) Pretty neat to see one action star play an icon next to a soon-to-be action star set to play another icon.

 

Anyway, Day Three!!

 

Fitness: Went to both my tai chi and my Zumba classes. 1 out of 2 cardio for the week done.

Nutrition: Another meal is in the freezer and I got to 110g of protein. 3/3 days of 100+ grams of protein and 3/4 make-ahead meals for the week done. So far so excellent.

Side quest: found an at-home program to do in the event July gets a little too much for me to handle and I need to skip the gym. I signed up for the Academy with a friend and I surprisingly do not hate the body weight program on there. I'm also very happy to see that I'm going to smash some Boss Battles pretty damn quickly, which is always good for the ego.

 

Tomorrow I do workout B of the new stage and I'm nervous about it. Some new equipment is being introduced. I really hope there are very few people in there when I walk in. You can't see me!

 

[Jord]

7 hours ago, Alaysia said:

 

 

Tomorrow I do workout B of the new stage and I'm nervous about it. Some new equipment is being introduced. I really hope there are very few people in there when I walk in. You can't see me!

 

 

If you can't do silly shit at the gym we better tell all those people jogging backwards on the treadmill to take a hike!

[Alaysia]

Ugh. I'm just about done with myself. Ever just want to put yourself in a closet until you're ready to human again? I'm right there.

 

Had another crap day. Low morale, apathetic in the extreme. Now, I'm not a scientist, but I'm seeing a correlation between bitchy, apathetic feelings and lift days. I'm also on Amazon and Craig's List every hour trying to find a way to afford my own squat cage with cable set-up. This is telling me I've lost all confidence in my lifting. Maybe the new stage in my program really is just too much for me to mentally handle. If that's true, I either need to woman-up and push it or I need to shift the program. I made up a lame excuse to not go into the gym to lift today, then was so mad at myself for doing it. I also decided that it must mean that I'm not made to lift and need to just go back to the treadmill. 

I know that isn't true. Or, at least, I'm pretty sure it's not and am willing to fight about it.

So, ok. I need to go with my flow. If I'm sabotaging my lift days out of nerves/fear/etc, then I need to change the program back to something that motivates me while also challenging me. I don't want to feel like a wuss, but I just need to understand who I am and if I'm not ready for some of these moves, then I'm just not ready. Just need to give myself permission to change tracks on my way to the same goal. Don't moan about it. Just move on, keep going.

 

Today was a wash. So, I'll regroup, and start again tomorrow. Right? Right.

[SevenofSeven]

4 hours ago, Alaysia said:

Ugh. I'm just about done with myself. Ever just want to put yourself in a closet until you're ready to human again? I'm right there.

 

Had another crap day. Low morale, apathetic in the extreme. Now, I'm not a scientist, but I'm seeing a correlation between bitchy, apathetic feelings and lift days. I'm also on Amazon and Craig's List every hour trying to find a way to afford my own squat cage with cable set-up. This is telling me I've lost all confidence in my lifting. Maybe the new stage in my program really is just too much for me to mentally handle. If that's true, I either need to woman-up and push it or I need to shift the program. I made up a lame excuse to not go into the gym to lift today, then was so mad at myself for doing it. I also decided that it must mean that I'm not made to lift and need to just go back to the treadmill. 

I know that isn't true. Or, at least, I'm pretty sure it's not and am willing to fight about it.

So, ok. I need to go with my flow. If I'm sabotaging my lift days out of nerves/fear/etc, then I need to change the program back to something that motivates me while also challenging me. I don't want to feel like a wuss, but I just need to understand who I am and if I'm not ready for some of these moves, then I'm just not ready. Just need to give myself permission to change tracks on my way to the same goal. Don't moan about it. Just move on, keep going.

 

Today was a wash. So, I'll regroup, and start again tomorrow. Right? Right.

Don't be so hard on yourself! New moves and exercises are hard and take a little while to get the hang of! This stage does not last as long as the first, so there is that.

 

A thought, do you have resistance bands? They can be set up at home for wood chops, it is what I used. Milk jugs filled with water for Dumbbells, house bricks covered in clothe also work, your broom handle with milk jugs make a great way to have a barbell, for your box deadlifts, or even just the jugs.

 

Sorry if I got a little over excited in the above, but I also started out with the bare minimum of equipment and struggled at times, because you know, fat chick trying to balance on one foot and do what???? Hang in there A! You can do this! 

[SpecialSundae]

We all have crappy days but hopefully the next one will be better!

 

I have to confess that I never did NROLFW because they had SO MANY complicated movements involved and it looked like my idea of hell!  I still wuss out of weird movements when I can.

 

See how it goes and give it a good try, but if it's putting you off then there's no shame in moving to a simpler programme!

[Thom Stépan]

Sounds like some good advice here. I would say if you are finding excuses to avoid a workout then do something to change it. If it is specific lifts drop them from your programme. The best work out is the one you actually do. I end up back with bodyweight workouts because I actually do them. Simple as that.

Woden uses ravens, I use an iphone.

[Alaysia]

9 hours ago, SevenofSeven said:

Don't be so hard on yourself! New moves and exercises are hard and take a little while to get the hang of! This stage does not last as long as the first, so there is that.

 

A thought, do you have resistance bands? They can be set up at home for wood chops, it is what I used. Milk jugs filled with water for Dumbbells, house bricks covered in clothe also work, your broom handle with milk jugs make a great way to have a barbell, for your box deadlifts, or even just the jugs.

 

Sorry if I got a little over excited in the above, but I also started out with the bare minimum of equipment and struggled at times, because you know, fat chick trying to balance on one foot and do what???? Hang in there A! You can do this! 

 

Oh, Seven, this is perfect! Do you remember in the NRoLFW where he says that he often sees guys not using proper form but tons of weight, and yet rarely ever sees a woman without proper form (but often with too little weight)? That's me. I was so focused on being "proper" that I didn't think outside the box. I was lamenting my inability to afford real equipment, forgetting I had heavy stuff I can lift around me. Thank you for that eye-opening slap upside the head!

[Alaysia]

8 hours ago, SpecialSundae said:

We all have crappy days but hopefully the next one will be better!

 

I have to confess that I never did NROLFW because they had SO MANY complicated movements involved and it looked like my idea of hell!  I still wuss out of weird movements when I can.

 

See how it goes and give it a good try, but if it's putting you off then there's no shame in moving to a simpler programme!

 

You do not even know how much I needed to hear this, especially from you. I needed to truly be ok with dropping what wasn't working for me without feeling like a loser. I can't ever see myself ever competing, but I hold you, and the others who do, as gurus, someone to strive to be like when in the weight room, ya  know? Thank you for validating what I was feeling! I'm not ashamed to say in the early days of any endeavor, sometime you just need outside validation to back you up.

 

7 hours ago, Thom Ulfhedinn said:

Sounds like some good advice here. I would say if you are finding excuses to avoid a workout then do something to change it. If it is specific lifts drop them from your programme. The best work out is the one you actually do. I end up back with bodyweight workouts because I actually do them. Simple as that.

 

 

Thank you!! I'm putting that up on my wall to remind myself of those wise words!

[Emerald_Dragonfly]

Late, but here to support. 

If your program isn't clicking with you, there is nothing wrong with finding another one. 

Or go back and try again - regardless, you can absolutely do this! 

 

[CourtnieMarie]

9 hours ago, SpecialSundae said:

We all have crappy days but hopefully the next one will be better!

 

I have to confess that I never did NROLFW because they had SO MANY complicated movements involved and it looked like my idea of hell!  I still wuss out of weird movements when I can.

 

See how it goes and give it a good try, but if it's putting you off then there's no shame in moving to a simpler programme!

i was going to say close to the same thing here! although i learned some valuable things from this program, front squat technique, one-legged DLs, etc. there were definitely time where i just thought i could never be a lifter because i couldn't do these "beginner" moves properly. do what makes you HAPPY and is going to keep you going back for more!

 

keep your head up! <3

[SpecialSundae]

3 hours ago, Alaysia said:

 

You do not even know how much I needed to hear this, especially from you. I needed to truly be ok with dropping what wasn't working for me without feeling like a loser. I can't ever see myself ever competing, but I hold you, and the others who do, as gurus, someone to strive to be like when in the weight room, ya  know? Thank you for validating what I was feeling! I'm not ashamed to say in the early days of any endeavor, sometime you just need outside validation to back you up.

 

Even long past the early days, you sometimes still need external validation from someone you look up to.

 

I have people in the gym who I look up to (admittedly, they're mostly big guys who've been lifting for years) so I know what it's like to have your heroes in the gym. I still stop whatever I'm doing and run to the other room to watch the big boys doing big sets. 

 

Anyway, yes, as Thom said, the best programme is the one you're going to stick to! 

[RedStone]

FINALLY finally just getting caught up (sorry I feel terrible things have been so busy!!) but it looks like you hit a rough patch? Not much else to say that hasn't been said, but it it's any consolation, I definitely went through that with Strong Lifts, got through half the program and just... didn't like it anymore. I felt really lost at sea while I was transitioning out of it, but like everyone said, finding something you enjoy will keep you coming back and doing it again and again. 

 

There's also something kind of empowering about flipping the script - it's like, oh I can't do this thing, I'm not good enough... but in so many cases, the thing isn't good enough for us - it doesn't speak to us, motivate us, even speak the same language. Going through the trial and error process, figuring out what we like and want to do and what we don't, seems to be part of the process. I hope anyway that there's a silver lining for you in the whole ordeal! 

[Alaysia]

3 hours ago, ~RedStone~ said:

There's also something kind of empowering about flipping the script - it's like, oh I can't do this thing, I'm not good enough... but in so many cases, the thing isn't good enough for us - it doesn't speak to us, motivate us, even speak the same language. Going through the trial and error process, figuring out what we like and want to do and what we don't, seems to be part of the process. I hope anyway that there's a silver lining for you in the whole ordeal! 

 

Man, that was perfect. Absolutely spot on and what I needed to see. I think the hardest part of this process is coming to the determination that I still lack a lot of confidence in myself. I mistook creating and then staying within my comfort zone as becoming more confident. I haven't needed to push myself in any real way in a long time. That has been quite a rude awakening. But I'm grateful for it. So I can look at my programming and not see failure or, worse, something not really worth pursuing because it makes me uncomfortable. It just isn't good enough, right enough for me at this moment and I'll change tack and perhaps come round to it again, later. Thank you for giving me the words I needed! 

[Alaysia]

JfC! I'm on the bench press! I've done 2 sets already. There are boys here. And I'm using the bench press. I'm so proud/terrified!!!

[ixaera]

4 minutes ago, Alaysia said:

JfC! I'm on the bench press! I've done 2 sets already. There are boys here. And I'm using the bench press. I'm so proud/terrified!!!

 

Woot!!!

[Captain Badass]

Hot boys in the gym certainly helps!

[Emerald_Dragonfly]

1 hour ago, Alaysia said:

JfC! I'm on the bench press! I've done 2 sets already. There are boys here. And I'm using the bench press. I'm so proud/terrified!!!

Rock it, girl!  You BELONG on that bench, too!

[Thom Stépan]

Awesome way to go Alaysia!

Woden uses ravens, I use an iphone.

[Alaysia]

I feel so much better.

First of all, my attitude was much better today. I didn't feel the sense of dread that was making me bitchy. I was nervous, but the good kind of nervous.

I was able to transition from goblet squats to regular ones with a pre-weighted barbell on my back. I think I hit proper depth about 60% of the time, but I'm happy to be able to do that much. I was prepared to have to just keep going with goblets if I couldn't hold my balance.

The whole time I was squatting and resting, I was warily eying the bench press. There were only 3 other people in the weights area and none of them seem interested in it. So there it sat, intimidating me. I've never bench pressed before. And let's be honest, that is one of the most vulnerable exercises. You are flat on your back, legs spread, back arched, weight directly over you with the ability to fall and pin you down. When one is already lacking confidence, that's a hard position to put oneself willingly. I was so close to chickening out and using the bench press machine. I tried talking myself into it several times, telling myself I would be working the same muscles. But I replayed everything you guys told me and when my squats were done, I marched over there and claimed the bench. 

 

One of my worries was that the bench would be too high and I wouldn't be able to get my feet on the floor. I'm 5'4" (162cm) and saw some of you other ladies dealing with this issue. I am so lucky that the bench was low enough for me to get my feet both flat on the floor and a little under me to give me an arch I could hold. I'll need to get video to see if I am in a good enough position, but for now, I'm really chuffed at being able to get at least a rough version of correct.

Just as I was getting ready to lay down the first time, a herd of men came into the weights area. Some were teens (the Y is allowing teens to join for free this summer) and there were a couple of much older gentlemen. So just as I am about to go belly up, men come into my space. If I were a canine, this would have been a no-go. But I reminded myself that I am, in fact, a human, just like them. I mentally tell them to "fuck off" in a Scottish accent, fluff my imaginary blond beard, and get to it.

I'm only using the bar and I immediately understood why the machine would have been vastly inferior. My bar path was really wobbly and I could feel my abdominal muscles (probably my lats?) engage to to try to keep balance. It wasn't horribly hard, but it was a bit of a challenge. I was able to get all my sets in, still wobbly, but completed. You all got mental high-fives when I stood up!

 

I also did barbell rows for the first time. I am pretty positive my form is bad. And I'm glad their were repairmen in the squat rack forcing me to use pre-weighted barbells. I had to go 10lbs lower than I was supposed to start with and that was just about perfect. Rows are a lot harder than I had thought. Probably even more so because of my form. Definitely need to get videos of everything next time. If nothing else than for giggles for months down the line when I am dominating everything.

 

Ya'll, I can not thank you enough for the encouragement and solid advice you gave me when I was questioning my very existence. You helped me rewrite my self-talk and I am so much happier for it. Thank you!!

 

 

[Captain Badass]

Yes mate!!!!!! 

 

Look at you kicking self-doubt in the balls! Set today's achievement firmly in the mind in case you ever doubt yourself again! 

 

This is also great to hear, as I've been struggling myself - stalling in all but one of my lifts at the same time has really sapped my motivation of late. So there you have it. You're inspiring. Thanks for sharing!

 

 

 

[SevenofSeven]

Love, love, love your write up! You so totally rock!

 

http://rebloggy.com/post/gif-mine-finding-nemo/16997446017

 

and that is supposed to be a gif for you, being awesome.

 

(my embedding skills are now crap apparently)

 

[Alaysia]

2 hours ago, Captain Badass said:

Yes mate!!!!!! 

 

Look at you kicking self-doubt in the balls! Set today's achievement firmly in the mind in case you ever doubt yourself again! 

 

This is also great to hear, as I've been struggling myself - stalling in all but one of my lifts at the same time has really sapped my motivation of late. So there you have it. You're inspiring. Thanks for sharing!

 

Right in the damn balls!

And if I have added any inspiration to you, then it is only paybacks for all that you have given me! *big sweaty gym hugs*

[ixaera]

15 hours ago, Alaysia said:

One of my worries was that the bench would be too high and I wouldn't be able to get my feet on the floor. I'm 5'4" (162cm) and saw some of you other ladies dealing with this issue.

 

I'm not quiiiite 5'0" and only get my toes on the floor. I shove plates under there

Toes are mostly fine on my lighter weights anyway, but for heavy loads and needing drive, plates!