Owlet vs Demogorgon or How I Learned to Love the Upside Down

[Owlet]

Owlet vs Demogorgon or: How I Learned to Love the Upside Down

(yeah, yeah, I know, my references are getting all mixed up. Don't care)

* I will do my best to avoid Stranger Things spoilers but advance at your own risk...*

 

It's War! The Battle To Sit Up Straight did not end so well for either side and things have escalated somewhat... My neck has developed a fun habit of seizing up/going into spasm/basically not performing it's usual neck duties to a satisfactory standard. Owls should be able to swivel their heads right around after all, so I'm barely an owl right now. The nights are long and dark, the storm clouds gathered weeks ago and continue to dump rain everywhere with careless abandon. Also, general anxiety about life ,stuff, the usual. So, lately I've been finding myself venturing into The Upside Down - a darker, scarier version of this world, an alternative universe if you will: 

 

And deep within The Upside Down lurks the Demogorgon. You don't want to come across this wee beastie, trust me. He's big and creepy and has a hell of an appetite

.

It really is best to run when this guy turns up to the party. But as for escaping The Upside Down, that's a little trickier. The more you fight it, the further in you sink...

 

So, to the challenge!

 

For the next few weeks, my priority is to avoid having any sort of breakdown due to stress, anxiety, depression etc etc. The only way out of breakdown land/the upside down, is to be kind to myself, recognise my limits and stick within them, do everything I can to get fit and healthy again so I can get back on track to the land of awesome sauce. It's a work in progress, but here's the plan so far:

 

Fitness:

• Walking: Since I can't do full workouts at the moment, and I'm not getting nearly enough vitamin D, it's time to ramp up the lunchtime walks again. Aim for at least 3 per week
• Neck Rehab: do whatever exercises and stretches the physiotherapist and osteopath give me to do
• Limited bodyweight exercises: work out which ones I can still do eg squats, lunges, do 2X per week

 

Diet:

• Paleo-ish: avoid refined carbs, excessive sugar. Maybe reintroduce some rice.
• Balance: make sure meals provide a good mix of nutrients.

 

Life Stuff:

• Bedtime: in bed by 10:30, lights out by 11:30. 
• Meditation: continue with 100 day challenge
• Art: life drawing each monday, or at least 2 hours of art at home

 

Getting to bed on time will be key to my escape plan - being tired gets me down and makes me fragile, keeping me in The Upside Down. Walking might turn out to be quite important too since I've been feeling very wintery and blue. Some fresh air and sunshine might be just the ticket. Other than that I will be trying to pay close attention to my mood and doing things to improve it - whether that is reaching out to friends, making a blanket nest on the couch for a night of movies, going horse riding, or treating myself to some waffles:

(promise I won't shoplift though )

 

At the end of the day, these goals are here to make me feel better, so if achieving them causes stress than alleviating it, I will reassess. The main thing is, by the end of this challenge I'll be feeling back to my normal self and ready to take on any old demogorgon that dares cross my path.

[Owlet]

I know this is meant to be Stranger Things theme ,but... this is my sunshine goal:

[NeverThatBored]

3 hours ago, Owlet said:

Walking might turn out to be quite important too since I've been feeling very wintery and blue.

 

Nice rhyme!  

[Lara]

You look ready!

[Owlet]

9 hours ago, NeverThatBored said:

 

Nice rhyme!  

Haha, had to read that a few times to see it!

[fleaball]

I want to watch Stranger Things but I'm a chicken and essentially live alone in a creaky, creepy house. D:

[Draegon (Liam P Boyle)]

The upside down, interesting. I always refer to my periods of depression as the black dog.

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[Owlet]

53 minutes ago, fleaball said:

I want to watch Stranger Things but I'm a chicken and essentially live alone in a creaky, creepy house. D:

watch it during the day? watch all 8 episodes in one go so you know how it ends and don't stay awake all night wondering if the scary things are going to happen? Dooo it! I am the biggest scardey-pants out there and I coped  

[fleaball]

1 minute ago, Owlet said:

watch it during the day? watch all 8 episodes in one go so you know how it ends and don't stay awake all night wondering if the scary things are going to happen? Dooo it! I am the biggest scardey-pants out there and I coped  

I typically forget about it until stupid o'clock at night. Maybe I'll kill it all this weekend.

[Owlet]

41 minutes ago, Liam P Boyle said:

The upside down, interesting. I always refer to my periods of depression as the black dog.

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I really like this poster, it kind of illustrates the idea:

[Owlet]

1 minute ago, fleaball said:

I typically forget about it until stupid o'clock at night. Maybe I'll kill it all this weekend.

My thread will make more sense if you do. No pressure =P

[fleaball]

31 minutes ago, Owlet said:

My thread will make more sense if you do. No pressure =P

Yeah yeah yeah.

[Bee]

I'm completely obsessed with Stranger Things.  Just watched it a couple weeks ago and ready to watch the season again.  I really resonated with the Upside Down and it helped me better understand my dark times -- and I also feel that sometimes versions of the Upside Down might not be so bad (versions without the Demogorgan and other unpleasant things, of course).  Good luck!  

[Owlet]

33 minutes ago, Bee said:

I'm completely obsessed with Stranger Things.  Just watched it a couple weeks ago and ready to watch the season again.  I really resonated with the Upside Down and it helped me better understand my dark times -- and I also feel that sometimes versions of the Upside Down might not be so bad (versions without the Demogorgan and other unpleasant things, of course).  Good luck!  

Isn't it great! my flatmates were teasing me because I started re-watching it so soon after the first time round lol. Yeah sometimes the Upside Down can be a good place to reflect. If only that damn Demogorgon would stop sniffing around. 

[Owlet]

Old mate demogorgon has been stomping around. I haven't seen him yet but I can hear his footsteps  Trying to stay hidden but it's hard. Work is a struggle today, I keep getting confused/stuff isn't working and it's mostly not my fault but I keep finding that out too late so I'm already stressing. Went for a lunchtime walk and it was beautiful but I'm just so worried about the thing that is getting me down. I know I should just face up to it and resolve it but it's not like it's going to be easy - people will get hurt, including me, and life will be more shit for a while. I'm not even sure if I should, but I'm psyching myself out so much that I kind of have to do something or I'll get deeper and deeper into the Upside Down. Bleh. Sorry this isn't more uplifting. 

[fleaball]

 Sounds like a shitty day. Idk what to say other than offer hugs.

[Owlet]

52 minutes ago, fleaball said:

 Sounds like a shitty day. Idk what to say other than offer hugs.

I misread that as shiny day and got excited. Apparently I am more magpie than owl lol. yay hugs  

[Draegon (Liam P Boyle)]

On 8/16/2016 at 11:17 PM, Owlet said:

Old mate demogorgon has been stomping around. I haven't seen him yet but I can hear his footsteps.... I keep getting confused/stuff isn't working and it's mostly not my fault but I keep finding that out too late so I'm already stressing. ... I'm just so worried about the thing that is getting me down. I know I should just face up to it and resolve it but it's not like it's going to be easy - people will get hurt, including me, and life will be more shit for a while. I'm not even sure if I should, ....

And in the times when the black dog visited the upside down and the demogorgon wandered free, the villagers shuttered themselves inside in fear ....

 

A woman I once knew told me some of the wisest words I have ever heard, "Any decision based on fear is the wrong one." It sounds like you are letting your fears and your depression control you. To expand your metaphor, perhaps the trick isn't to hide from the demogorgon and the black dog, or to try and defeat them, but to leash them - make their destructive energy work for you to burn away negative habits so that more posistive ones emerge.

 

Of course this is all much more easily said than done, and words are cheap coming from the guy who has to rely on chemical assistance (zoloft) to control his demons, but I believe you can do this.

 

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[Owlet]

39 minutes ago, Liam P Boyle said:

A woman I once knew told me some of the wisest words I have ever heard, "Any decision based on fear is the wrong one." It sounds like you are letting your fears and your depression control you

 

Wise words indeed, thanks for sharing  It is so hard sometimes to pick through my own brain and work out what is even real or what is just my delusions. The problem I'm facing though is logic is telling me one thing but I'm scared to do it because it will be painful, even though I think I'll be better off in the long run. But I've never done it before so it's stressing me out a lot. 

 

 

42 minutes ago, Liam P Boyle said:

To expand your metaphor, perhaps the trick isn't to hide from the demogorgon and the black dog, or to try and defeat them, but to leash them - make their destructive energy work for you to burn away negative habits so that more posistive ones emerge.

 

Yes! I was thinking today I don't think I quite got the metaphor right, or the challenge or whatever. I do like the idea of assigning a metaphor or character to the darkness - it makes it easier to separate my true self from depressed or anxious thoughts. Unfortunately it's not quite giving me the power to overcome them though. Not yet at least. I did have a thought today though that encouraged me: as much as I hate feeling like this, it might be just the thing to push me to take action and improve my situation. Also, it is a chance to prove to myself that I have grown in the last 2 years (since I last felt really down) It is a big deal to me to prove whether I can change things about my personality, so this could be quite motivating. Didn't stop me getting upset of course, but I feel a bit better after catching up with a close friend tonight. 

 

 

A friend posted this today, very timely: 

 

"....There may be times when, confronted by cruel reality, we verge on losing all hope. If we cannot feel hope, it is time to create some. We can do this by digging deeper within, searching for even a small glimmer of light, for the possibility of a way to begin to break through the impasse before us. And our capacity for hope can actually be expanded and strengthened by difficult circumstances. Hope that has not been tested is nothing more than a fragile dream. Hope begins from this challenge, this effort to strive toward an ideal, however distant it may seem."

[Owlet]

Much better day today. Did not hear or see the demogorgon or even venture into the Upside Down at all  I think my realisations yesterday about this struggle being a chance to prove myself and grow actually helped. I didn't feel anxious at all today, or as overwhelmed. I did feel tired and my neck and shoulder started to hurt again, but I was happy to just have that to deal with rather than the mental stuff. Could've gone for a lunchtime walk but my work mate asked if I wanted to get lunch and I decided social interaction would benefit me more (it did) Still struggled to get through the afternoon of work and once I hit the couch at home I reeeaaally didn't want to move. But I forced myself to get up again and go to a Buddhist meeting because they always seem to improve my mood. The general theme of the night was 'turning your struggle into a mission' and transforming your situation in general - very good timing  Feeling more hopeful now.

[Fluffy]

1 hour ago, Owlet said:

The general theme of the night was 'turning your struggle into a mission' and transforming your situation in general

Sounds like great timing.  Glad you are listening to yourself - trading in a walk for a social interaction - good call.  And super kudos for not getting sucked it the couch nest!

[fleaball]

I'm on episode 2, watching it in broad daylight, and totally not cowering on the couch at all and watching it with my hands in front of my face. Nope. Not me. Totally not.

 

I hate you.

[Bee]

On 8/17/2016 at 3:14 AM, Owlet said:

I do like the idea of assigning a metaphor or character to the darkness - it makes it easier to separate my true self from depressed or anxious thoughts. Unfortunately it's not quite giving me the power to overcome them though. Not yet at least. I did have a thought today though that encouraged me: as much as I hate feeling like this, it might be just the thing to push me to take action and improve my situation.

 

When I finally embraced this idea I felt empowered.  I spent a lot of time trying to control and get rid of my anxiety, depression, and ADHD.  But what I slowly learned is that those things are a part of me.  They make me who I am and give me my "special powers" of observation, intuition, and insight.  Now I feel like I want to embrace them and use them to help me, and also use them as tools to let me know when I need to slow down or get help.  Hugs!  

[Owlet]

7 hours ago, fleaball said:

I'm on episode 2, watching it in broad daylight, and totally not cowering on the couch at all and watching it with my hands in front of my face. Nope. Not me. Totally not.

 

I hate you.

Muhahahaha! I mean, oops, sorry =P I hope you're enjoying it too though? It made me appreciate the power of suspense - if you can see the bad guy or monster or whatever, it's kind of ok. It's way scarier when you're not sure where he is though heh. If it gets too much just watch some Les Mis or something  

[Owlet]

On 8/18/2016 at 11:26 PM, Fluffy said:

Sounds like great timing.  Glad you are listening to yourself - trading in a walk for a social interaction - good call.  And super kudos for not getting sucked it the couch nest!

FLUFFY! welcome hehe. Yeah I am getting better at listening to myself rather than sticking to a plan just for the sake of it. Looking at the big picture here  Ugh couch nest is always so tempting...