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Disordered Eating Support


RedStone

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32 minutes ago, Stellakin said:

 

Hello! This really is helping; I feel like a lot of us probably see it as our deep, dark secret - even on a site like this in which eating and fitness is the focal point.

 

 

100% agreed. I've heard of people having trouble when they do share their issues with even a close friend and the response is something like: "You're trying to eat more? I wish I had that problem!" The worst part is that many of us have seen both sides too. I kind of think of it like a pendulum, how it rocks from side to side, one extreme to the other. It can be hard to explain to someone ... but I know my goal is to get it to slow down and stop somewhere nicely in the middle LOL 

 

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I've found that something really helpful for me has been to take really good care of my skin. I know that sounds crazy but I have a whole skincare routine complete with serum, sheet masks, face masks, moisturizer, eye cream, night cream, etc... What sounds like a tedious chore has actually become a bit of a self-pamper routine at night, to unwind after work and before I go to sleep. Keeps my skin glowing and gives me one thing off the top of my head that I can say "actually, I like that about myself"; 

 

Keeping care of yourself is really difficult to do so if you can turn those negative, destructive habits into positive, self-care ones, that's a win-win! :D

 

Doesn't sound crazy at all. My AHA moment was on a day where I woke up and just saw horrible horrible ugly in the mirror. Coincidentally I had a spa treatment of some sort booked that day (I don't even remember what it was), but right after, I just saw lovely. I knew my face and body hadn't actually changed, just a perspective shift! Ever since then I always do SOMETHING when dysmorphia creeps it's nasty head, whether it's pampering or a physical activity in nature or some such that always perks me up :) That's when self love needs to come and destroyyyyyyy

 

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Don't worry, I have enough gifs to keep us covered B)

 

 

HA! LOVE IT!! :D:D:D 

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15 minutes ago, ~RedStone~ said:

 

100% agreed. I've heard of people having trouble when they do share their issues with even a close friend and the response is something like: "You're trying to eat more? I wish I had that problem!" The worst part is that many of us have seen both sides too. I kind of think of it like a pendulum, how it rocks from side to side, one extreme to the other. It can be hard to explain to someone ... but I know my goal is to get it to slow down and stop somewhere nicely in the middle LOL 

 

 

Doesn't sound crazy at all. My AHA moment was on a day where I woke up and just saw horrible horrible ugly in the mirror. Coincidentally I had a spa treatment of some sort booked that day (I don't even remember what it was), but right after, I just saw lovely. I knew my face and body hadn't actually changed, just a perspective shift! Ever since then I always do SOMETHING when dysmorphia creeps it's nasty head, whether it's pampering or a physical activity in nature or some such that always perks me up :) That's when self love needs to come and destroyyyyyyy

 

 

HA! LOVE IT!! :D:D:D 

 

I completely get that. It's nice being here and knowing other people can relate, and will understand the nonsense going on in my mind, haha! And yes; I think that's really the key: trying to do something. When I find myself having one of those days, or weeks, or months, it can be so easy to just roll over, fire a bunch of self-critical thoughts at myself and want to hide under baggy clothes forever. Sometimes when I feel like that I don't even want to do something kind for myself; in a weird way, destructive behaviour tends to creep up on me when I'm already low, just to kick me when I'm down, ya'know? Sometimes we don't want to help ourselves or it becomes hard, but trying to do something - anything at all - is the key, at least for me! So if I don't have an appointment booked soon, I'll make myself dress up or do my makeup; anything to feel like I'm pampering myself just a little, or so that even if I'm hating on myself I can at least say "damn, my eyebrows are on fleek!" haha! Or like you said, going for a nice long hike, getting that blood pumping! :D  

 

And oh, I'm not even kidding :P  

Image result for high five gif

 

[edit] Ooh, just noticed the username and photo... are you a minecraft fan by any chance?

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Stella   ::   Sprightly Elf   ::   Level 1

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2 hours ago, ~RedStone~ said:

 

Yeah, that's basically how mine went too - bulemia nervosa - and I more or less self recovered and never really learned how to eat properly... Gained a bunch of weight, then lost it again with a severe caloric deficit. Fast forward to now and I'm finally learning how to eat and I've never felt so healthy before! What kind of fitness practices are you getting in to? 

I've walked at least 10,000 steps a day for 16 days in a row now! That's definitely one of my daily practices, plus has made me super good at Pokemon Go. I also hit up the gym a couple times a week, but usually only do light work on the machines and some cardio stuff. Still better than nothing

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Walking to Mordor - Hobbiton to Rivendell: 97.1 miles out of 458

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2 hours ago, Stellakin said:

are you a minecraft fan by any chance?

 

Who... me?!

 

s2RccuP.gif

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2 hours ago, liveforwonder said:

I've walked at least 10,000 steps a day for 16 days in a row now! That's definitely one of my daily practices, plus has made me super good at Pokemon Go. I also hit up the gym a couple times a week, but usually only do light work on the machines and some cardio stuff. Still better than nothing

 

That's fantastic! An excellent place. Have you thought about the guilds yet and where you might like to find yourself?

 

I'm at a point where I have so much magic potion in my (full) bag that I have to start hitting the gym just to injure my poor Pokes, just so I can use up the potion to make more room in my bag! Poor things... I know they're not ready but what choice do I have? (I actually thought they died at first, when they get beat at the gym LOL poor little things...) But I guess I'll get better at battling? So not all bad lol :P 

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13 minutes ago, Stellakin said:

 

Woo, me too! 

picgifs-minecraft-1105739.gif

 

YAY! MINECRAFT FTW!!!! There is occasionally a public NF minecraft server set up for wee nerds :D It's adorbs.

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2 hours ago, ~RedStone~ said:

 

That's fantastic! An excellent place. Have you thought about the guilds yet and where you might like to find yourself?

 

I'm at a point where I have so much magic potion in my (full) bag that I have to start hitting the gym just to injure my poor Pokes, just so I can use up the potion to make more room in my bag! Poor things... I know they're not ready but what choice do I have? (I actually thought they died at first, when they get beat at the gym LOL poor little things...) But I guess I'll get better at battling? So not all bad lol :P 

Oh man I totally do that too. I'll use my whole team against like the first pokemon in the gym and then just exhaust all my potions/revives on them. I've actually been walking enough that i've been able to hatch some of the 10 km eggs though and got some really cool 'mons :D I really haven't thought of guilds...I joined NF about 2 years ago and have gone through long periods of inactivity so I think in the beginning I just joined the most general guild and really haven't thought of it much since then? Idk. I should probably revisit that.

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Liveforwonder's Quest Log

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Walking to Mordor - Hobbiton to Rivendell: 97.1 miles out of 458

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6 hours ago, liveforwonder said:

Oh man I totally do that too. I'll use my whole team against like the first pokemon in the gym and then just exhaust all my potions/revives on them. I've actually been walking enough that i've been able to hatch some of the 10 km eggs though and got some really cool 'mons :D I really haven't thought of guilds...I joined NF about 2 years ago and have gone through long periods of inactivity so I think in the beginning I just joined the most general guild and really haven't thought of it much since then? Idk. I should probably revisit that.

I just discard my extra potions, revives, a poke balls to make more room. 

 

In my experience, joining a guild is pretty helpful, at least if you are doing the 4 week challenges. 

Current Challenge: Zeroh, stick to the routine!

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12 hours ago, liveforwonder said:

Oh man I totally do that too. I'll use my whole team against like the first pokemon in the gym and then just exhaust all my potions/revives on them. I've actually been walking enough that i've been able to hatch some of the 10 km eggs though and got some really cool 'mons :D I really haven't thought of guilds...I joined NF about 2 years ago and have gone through long periods of inactivity so I think in the beginning I just joined the most general guild and really haven't thought of it much since then? Idk. I should probably revisit that.

 

LOL NICE! I totally need to do that more. :D 

 

Guilds are cool if you have a specific type of exercise in mind cause you can get guidance and support, or the Rebel class is good if you aren't sure or just like everything :D It's nice to have help when there are question marks surrounding my head lol

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And not that I'm advocating for any one particular guild *cough warriors *cough *cough (kidding!) but a friend passed this video on and it's something I really really relate to so I thought I'd share :D 

 

 

http://startingstrength.com/article/the-price-of-control-the-cost-of-discipline

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15 hours ago, ~RedStone~ said:

 

YAY! MINECRAFT FTW!!!! There is occasionally a public NF minecraft server set up for wee nerds :D It's adorbs.

 

Oooh I had no idea! I tend to play on Xbox for the most part but for the most part I'm a PC gamer so we'll see >:3 

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Stella   ::   Sprightly Elf   ::   Level 1

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46 minutes ago, ~RedStone~ said:

And not that I'm advocating for any one particular guild *cough warriors *cough *cough (kidding!) but a friend passed this video on and it's something I really really relate to so I thought I'd share :D 

 

 

http://startingstrength.com/article/the-price-of-control-the-cost-of-discipline

Wow. That's so crazy amazing.My main issue with lifting is like....I'm a 5'4" kinda overweight woman and all the people in the free weights area of the gym are these huge super buff guys. It's very intimidating. I guess that 's why I just stick to the machines in another section, because I don't feel like I need the secret password to the club or whatever.

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Liveforwonder's Quest Log

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Walking to Mordor - Hobbiton to Rivendell: 97.1 miles out of 458

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2 minutes ago, liveforwonder said:

Wow. That's so crazy amazing.My main issue with lifting is like....I'm a 5'4" kinda overweight woman and all the people in the free weights area of the gym are these huge super buff guys. It's very intimidating. I guess that 's why I just stick to the machines in another section, because I don't feel like I need the secret password to the club or whatever.

 

I can relate! I'm also 5'4 and not the strongest-looking; it can be quite intimidating to walk into a room full of gigantic men bench-pressing huge weights. A few years back when I was reading Steve's site I felt this sudden inspiration to go and work out, to get past that silly fear of doing weights as a, *shockgasp*, woman! But it felt so intimidating when I walked in that I scuttled straight back out again :(

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Stella   ::   Sprightly Elf   ::   Level 1

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Just now, Stellakin said:

 

I can relate! I'm also 5'4 and not the strongest-looking; it can be quite intimidating to walk into a room full of gigantic men bench-pressing huge weights. A few years back when I was reading Steve's site I felt this sudden inspiration to go and work out, to get past that silly fear of doing weights as a, *shockgasp*, woman! But it felt so intimidating when I walked in that I scuttled straight back out again :(

I'm still in college, so I go to the gym on campus. And it's like....the entire football/basketball/whateverball team is in there just benching god knows what and being all HWAH and AAAAAAR and I immediately decide to go squat while holding a barbell somewhere else or whatever. The ExSci students have started a personal trainer program this year so I'm thinking about getting one of them to work with me maybe...

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Liveforwonder's Quest Log

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Walking to Mordor - Hobbiton to Rivendell: 97.1 miles out of 458

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Just now, liveforwonder said:

I'm still in college, so I go to the gym on campus. And it's like....the entire football/basketball/whateverball team is in there just benching god knows what and being all HWAH and AAAAAAR and I immediately decide to go squat while holding a barbell somewhere else or whatever. The ExSci students have started a personal trainer program this year so I'm thinking about getting one of them to work with me maybe...

 

Hahaha! My nearest gym is, conveniently, next to my workplace. But it is also, coincidentally, next to a rugby academy! So you'll walk in and instantly you're just a tiny little woman surrounded by teen boys younger than you who are these hulking beasts! I always ended up ducking out and heading to my same two machines; the rowing machine and horizontal seated leg press *holds face in hands* But ooooh that personal trainer program sounds amazing! Definitely worth a shot if you ask me! :) 

Stella   ::   Sprightly Elf   ::   Level 1

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1 minute ago, liveforwonder said:

Sometimes I eat something, then afterwards realize how many calories it was and immediately feel sick to my stomach and start the rant of "you're fat you're gross you're fat" in my head....

 

Just remember; no matter how calories something is, eating it once won't effect your body or weight overnight. Take a deep breathe and remember that it's okay. A lot of us here probably find ourselves going through that very same feeling but it'll pass. Try drinking some ice cold water or getting some fresh air; or doing a few of the things that Redstone posted about when she feels body dysmorphia rearing its ugly head. I bet that they could help with that feeling too! 

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Stella   ::   Sprightly Elf   ::   Level 1

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1 hour ago, Stellakin said:

 

Just remember; no matter how calories something is, eating it once won't effect your body or weight overnight. Take a deep breathe and remember that it's okay. A lot of us here probably find ourselves going through that very same feeling but it'll pass. Try drinking some ice cold water or getting some fresh air; or doing a few of the things that Redstone posted about when she feels body dysmorphia rearing its ugly head. I bet that they could help with that feeling too! 

All of this, yes. If this happens to me when it's nice out I'll usually try to go for a walk.

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Current Challenge: Zeroh, stick to the routine!

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8 hours ago, Stellakin said:

 

Oooh I had no idea! I tend to play on Xbox for the most part but for the most part I'm a PC gamer so we'll see >:3 

 

So far I've only seen it come up once and there were some server issues so I never managed to finish the roof of my quaint little cottage, though @Duality managed to get an epic fortress castle mansion together before I could blink!! I'm also xbox mostly but when I did it the group thing it was on my mac. Not sure if xbox can? Maybe?

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7 hours ago, liveforwonder said:

Wow. That's so crazy amazing.My main issue with lifting is like....I'm a 5'4" kinda overweight woman and all the people in the free weights area of the gym are these huge super buff guys. It's very intimidating. I guess that 's why I just stick to the machines in another section, because I don't feel like I need the secret password to the club or whatever.

 

Yeah, this was me too! (Roll call for shorties? Yo!) That was actually what my first intro thread was about :P 

 

7 hours ago, Stellakin said:

 

I can relate! I'm also 5'4 and not the strongest-looking; it can be quite intimidating to walk into a room full of gigantic men bench-pressing huge weights. A few years back when I was reading Steve's site I felt this sudden inspiration to go and work out, to get past that silly fear of doing weights as a, *shockgasp*, woman! But it felt so intimidating when I walked in that I scuttled straight back out again :(

 

20 Seconds of courage. It's like ripping off a bandage, gets easier every time.

 

6 hours ago, liveforwonder said:

I'm still in college, so I go to the gym on campus. And it's like....the entire football/basketball/whateverball team is in there just benching god knows what and being all HWAH and AAAAAAR and I immediately decide to go squat while holding a barbell somewhere else or whatever. The ExSci students have started a personal trainer program this year so I'm thinking about getting one of them to work with me maybe...

 

Yep, I know exactly what you mean! The dudes (and that one woman) that hang in the weight room... well, they seem like they are just built that way, but they all started somewhere, just like us. Chances are, 99% of the people doing that stuff are just ordinary people trying to get fit and strong, but I can readily admit that I needed those 20 seconds of courage to go for it those first few sessions.

 

I'm certainly not going to turn this into a campaign for lifting weights (even though it's awesome hehehe ;)) because hey yo, there are lots of other awesome things that are also super empowering and great for building confidence as well as health! My life changed on a dime when I started training martial arts, and I don't know if there's anything that gives me a greater sense of peace and satisfaction than a hike in nature. Ultimately, whatever you like doing will be the thing you keep coming back for! And I think the positive takeaway is that food is the fuel that helps our bodies do the things we love to do, that make us feel strong and happy and confident in our skin. We are all entitled to this kind of happiness, every single person in the weight room or swimming pool or Kung Fu school or just on the street. EVERYONE has a rightful place to go for it.

 

(That being said, there are certain times of the day when the gym is just PACKED. I try to avoid these times :P It's just unnecessary stress if I can avoid it lol)

 

Meanwhile, I super love the idea of working with a trainer! Not only does it give you confidence in what you're doing, it also orients you in the what-the-hell-is-this-machine-for forest ;) A good trainer can identify your fitness level and set you on a safe path towards your goals while doing the things you enjoy! If you have the opportunity, why not? :D 

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7 hours ago, liveforwonder said:

Sometimes I eat something, then afterwards realize how many calories it was and immediately feel sick to my stomach and start the rant of "you're fat you're gross you're fat" in my head....

 

7 hours ago, Stellakin said:

 

Just remember; no matter how calories something is, eating it once won't effect your body or weight overnight. Take a deep breathe and remember that it's okay. A lot of us here probably find ourselves going through that very same feeling but it'll pass. Try drinking some ice cold water or getting some fresh air; or doing a few of the things that Redstone posted about when she feels body dysmorphia rearing its ugly head. I bet that they could help with that feeling too! 

 

5 hours ago, zeroh13 said:

All of this, yes. If this happens to me when it's nice out I'll usually try to go for a walk.

 

Yep. It happens. No matter how far I feel I've come, it happens once in awhile. On top of all the excellent points here (and a walk in nature? Yeah, that always helps me quiet down those nasty thoughts), there's an element of forgiveness involved too. Sometimes we eat the thing maybe we shouldn't have. Does that make me a terrible person? Nah. Am I permanently altered because of it? Nah. Should I do it again the next day? Probably not lol :P The next day will come and maybe I remember making myself feel bad and try not to do it again. There are enough bad things in the world, if I can keep myself from adding to the pot once in awhile, I'll call that a win! Reminding myself that everyone gets to be happy, (even me! why is that so hard to remember sometimes?) helps me from doing the destructive things that make me feel bad. 

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Nothing to add, except I'm using my shiny Guild Leader Buttons to pin this topic.  Fantastic idea, OP.

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RisenPhoenix, the Entish Aikidoka

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"The essence of koryu [...is] you offer your loyalty to something that you choose to regard as greater than yourself so that you will, someday, be able to offer service to something that truly is transcendent." ~ Ellis Amdur, Old School

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2 hours ago, RisenPhoenix said:

Nothing to add, except I'm using my shiny Guild Leader Buttons to pin this topic.  Fantastic idea, OP.

 

1 hour ago, Stellakin said:

Thank you for pinning! And I second that Redstone sure had a fantastic idea starting this thread :)  

 

Thank you for this, I hope it helps as many people as possible :D 

 

swfZKu7.gif

 

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