Elias the Undefined : Battle Log

[Nithou]

20 hours ago, Lydiechan said:

 

Hahah!  Thanks!  I don't have Alzheimers.  But one of the most effective ways to combat dementia is to read a lot.   I'm just forward-thinking.

 

Meal prep is a struggle for me, too.  My husband doesn't mind eating once a day, but if I don't get food in me every 3-5 hours I become a really cranky woman.  Probably something to do with blood sugar, but I haven't bothered to have it checked out.  My little brother (age 35) makes a point of buying things that are easily consumable and either prepackaged or easily re-packaged.  It seems like a sound strategy.

 

I suggest looking up the book It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken.  It's marketed toward women, but it is absolutely applicable to men, as well.  It helped me make a lot of sense out of my first (and only) big breakup.

 

Haha on this side I don't have any troubles  Even discovered that intermittent fasting gave me more energy during the day  I think the fact that I have so much trouble to get up is probably due to a latent depression, but I don't want to go back to pills, so I just hope it'll pass. I understand your little brother strategy but then most of the easy-consumable / prepackaged things are reaaally crappy like full of sugars & carbs  For a while I used meal replacements like Soylent for those evening where I didn't feel at all like cooking but at some point you've got to go back to the kitchen if you want to eat something that has more taste.

 

Thanks a lot for the book suggestion, I'm already halfway through it an my God it helps! And as I'm gay, the fact that it's written for girls helps to relate (by the fact that they're talking about boyfriends)... I've been through a hell lot of break up but this one is really hard, still this book is incredibly helpful. So thanks so much for this, it's really brightening my week <3

[Nithou]

Day 47 (01/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch: Fasting

- Dinner: Cauliflower Pizza (1/2)

 

Weight: 70.2kg (16.7%)

 

Exercises:

- 40 minutes of bike (YES)

- 1 minute of plank

 

Notes for the day:

- The day started really bad, but then got steadily better while reading "It's called a break-up because it's broken" (thanks a lot Lydiechan for this)

- The cauliflower pizza was a success but could just eat 1/2 of it, it's quite fulfilling

- Finally started Twin Peaks, loved the pilot

- Deleted all the gay apps and profiles. This isn't helping me at all, and the people on it aren't at all what I'm searching for. Nor it is the time to search for someone

- Finally started to realize some things that were going wrong with my ex.

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: ✓

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps:  -

Nerves: ✓

[Lydiechan]

5 hours ago, Nithou said:

Thanks a lot for the book suggestion, I'm already halfway through it an my God it helps!

 

I'm glad!  It made a lot of difference for me, too.

 

I want to really encourage you not to just hope that the depression goes away.  I take a very low dosage SSRI daily to deal with anxiety, which I really believe is a side effect of the unhealthy environment we live in (sugar, drugs, chemicals, pollutants, etc.), and I think affects a lot of our moods (which are often chemically influenced).

 

If you choose not to use a drug to combat that, which is a reasonable decision, make sure you're surrounding yourself with encouraging, positive people.  We become who we spend time with.  People who have a bright outlook help others have a bright outlook.

 

Keep being intentional!

[Nithou]

19 hours ago, Lydiechan said:

 

I'm glad!  It made a lot of difference for me, too.

 

I want to really encourage you not to just hope that the depression goes away.  I take a very low dosage SSRI daily to deal with anxiety, which I really believe is a side effect of the unhealthy environment we live in (sugar, drugs, chemicals, pollutants, etc.), and I think affects a lot of our moods (which are often chemically influenced).

 

If you choose not to use a drug to combat that, which is a reasonable decision, make sure you're surrounding yourself with encouraging, positive people.  We become who we spend time with.  People who have a bright outlook help others have a bright outlook.

 

Keep being intentional!

 

I'm very lucky to be surrounded by incredibly supporting friends (well except for the fitness part, there I have to drag them but I can't have everything)  And currently in the process of kicking the toxic people from my life (using a rocket launcher), can't stand constant negativity anymore  

 

By the way I finished your book, it was really incredibly helpful, I think it helped me spend my first really good day for this week and even today I'm feeling so much better. I finally see my relationship for what it really was and not how I romanticized it and it helps me a lot moving forward. Now I'll advise this book to everyone going through a break up  Thanks so so much for this and your messages <3

[Nithou]

Day 48 (02/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch: 3 chicken & bacon wraps with salad

- Dinner: 3 Perfumes Pork & White Rice

 

Weight: 70.4kg (16.5%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Finished "It's called a break-up because it is broken" and god it helped me so much. The kick in the back I needed

- Spent a really great day (yaaay sun)

- Spent a wonderful evening with two friends

 

Meditation: ✓
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps:  -

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 49 (03/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch: McDonald (ayayaya)

- Dinner: Ikea Meatballs & French Fries (okay full cheat day /o/)

 

Weight: 71.2kg (17%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Spent the evening getting to know more a new friend and meeting a friend of his

- Had a pretty good day

- Finished Aren't you glad you read this?

 

Meditation: ✓
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps:  -

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 50 (04/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch: Vol Au Vent & french fries

- Dinner: 1/2 Cauliflower pizza + Apero snacks

 

Weight: 72.2kg (15.9%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Opened the bank accounts for my future society this morning

- Spent the evening at the housewarming party of a new friend, met new people it was really great
- Bought a new stuffed animal to sleep with (Yep, not ashamed), the previous one was from my ex

- Everything related to my ex has been packed, remaining links severed, i'm feeling much better

 

Meditation: ✓
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 51 (05/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch: 2 Giant + French Fries (no excuse)

- Dinner: 3 squared pizzas slices

 

Weight: 71.9kg (17%)

 

Exercises:

Ok, this was hard. A friend of mine started teaching me to deadlift so this morning I'm aching all over but I'll definetly do it again :

- Deadlift 60 kg. Progressive from 40 to 60, 10 times each +5kgs

- 15 kgs biceps curls. 20 times

- 40kg bench press. Started at 30kg then +5kg increment, 10 times each

- 25kg for squats, 2x10 times

 

 

Notes for the day:

- Spent the evening with a friend

- Can't stand the shitty weather anymore, like really

- Totally bought Torment on the Playstation

- Way too much alcohol lately

 

Meditation: ✓
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Ok after 50 days, time to reflect on some points here and there and some objectives I had.

 

Stop coffee: this helped me, I'm feeling in fact more energized. On the downside, I've become totally too sensitive to caffeine, so even a Coke Zero is able to keep me awake for 5 hours, meaning I really have to avoid it past 6PM. Will have to find some sugar free alternative that doesn't involve caffeine.

 

Reading: I've read a hell lot of books, I'm already past half my yearly objective and some really helped me. So I'll keep this on

 

Meditation: This and dwelling into stoïcism really helped me through the break up, I'll keep doing my ±10 minutes meditation every day as it both ease my mind, calm my anxieties and help me observe things from a distance

 

Daily journaling: keeping this on, helps me to empty my mind every morning, but it also help me to see how I'm evolving and to be able to go back in time to understand why I did some things, how I did them, ...

 

No Alcohol: lately I've given this up, it's not an objective anymore for me. I've realized that I didn't had any alcohol related problem, and that I was just in fact terribly sad in the end of my relationship. Alcohol just revealed that. However, stopping alcohol for 43 days in a row helped me to deal with it in a better way, I now know exactly when I need to stop.

 

6000 steps a day: Easy in the week-end, not easy during the week. i'll keep this but I'm clearly waiting for the weather to improve.

 

Exercise daily: this was totally crushed by the break-up. I'll have to go back to it, with the end of my current month assignment it'll be easier. But I'll try to stick to 3 days a week instead.

 

Weight: Still have to go down, but switched form 32 to 28 for my jeans, I'm able to wear S sized shirts, I'm clearly happier with how I look. I also learned how to dress properly and take better care of my skin and things like that. Still working on this but my self confidence is improving day to day.

[Nithou]

Day 52 (06/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch: -

- Dinner: Big giant burgers

 

Weight: 71.3kg (16,8%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Finished my mission as freelancer \o/

- Spent the evening with a friend of mine watching The Expanses

- Feeling pretty good

 

Meditation: ✓
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: -

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 53 (07/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch & Dinner : 4 slices of italian pizza

 

Weight: 71.1kg (16,8%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Me day \o/ Walked the city to buy myself a new 3DS XL that I wanted badly for several days

- Spent the rest of the day playing Torment

- Saw my mum, was really nice

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 54 (08/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch : Chicken & Cheese Preparation

- Dinner : Cheesy Waffle Outside 

 

Weight: 71.2kg (16,9%)

 

Exercises:

Several stretching exercices, 5x5 chin ups, 3x15 bodyweight row with 8kg kettlebel, biceps curls with 2x2kg 5x15, quadriceps work

 

Notes for the day:

- Went to the Book Fair inaugration here it was really nice

- Felt a bit moody

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

 

Day 55 (09/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch : Chicken & Cheese Preparation

- Dinner : Duck with pepper saus

 

Weight: 71.8kg (17,1%)

 

Exercises:

 

Notes for the day:

- Feeling a bit moody

- Went to see Logan, was "meh"

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 56 (10/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch : Chicken & Cheese Preparation

- Dinner : /

 

Weight: 71kg (17%)

 

Exercises:

Weight training at the gym, 30 minutes biking

- 5x5 12.5kg Squat

- 5/5/4/5/5 20kg Bench Press

- 5x5 20kg Barbell Row

 

Notes for the day:

- Spent the evening at a wine bar with friend

- Sunny daaaay, went outside for a walk it felt great

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 57-58-59 (11-12-13/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Mostly outside, restaurants, ...

 

Weight: 70.5kg (17%)

 

Exercises:

Spent the week-end walking around, danced all night on Sunday

 

Notes for the day:

- Really weird week-end, spent every single day meeting old friends and reliving moments from my life. Serial flashbacks

- Had a commemorative drink for a deceased friend, was emotionnaly charged

- Felt really weird during the whole week-end

- Way too much alcohol non stop.

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Lydiechan]

On 3/3/2017 at 4:08 AM, Nithou said:

By the way I finished your book, it was really incredibly helpful, I think it helped me spend my first really good day for this week and even today I'm feeling so much better. I finally see my relationship for what it really was and not how I romanticized it and it helps me a lot moving forward. Now I'll advise this book to everyone going through a break up  Thanks so so much for this and your messages <3

 

I was the exact same after I finished reading it.  And you're not alone - I think we all romanticize our partners and our relationships.  It's very hard to see other people for who they really are, and not who we know they could be, or who we want them to be.  It's funny - we see the worst in ourselves and the best in everyone else.  Maybe that's backwards...

[Nithou]

Day 60 (13/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch : Durum

- Dinner : New York Burger & Potaoes

 

Weight: 70.8kg (17%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Felt really down during the whole day, called friends to help

- Can't be strong all the time. But have to go through the sadness and keep moving forward.

- Stopped this whole cycle of flashback "what happened in last seasons of your life...". Let bygones be bygones.

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 61-62-63 (14-15-16/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch : 1/2 Pizza

- Restaurant

 

Weight: 70.6kg (17.2%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Got terribly sick unfortunately (virus that come and go every year), so lately I've been catching up sleep which is really boring me

- Got some nice interviews and working with cool clients lately

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓

[Nithou]

Day 64 (17/03/2017)

 

Food: 

- Lunch : 1/2 Pizza (leftover)

- Dinner : Ham, cheese, bread

 

Weight: 70.8kg (16.6%)

 

Exercises:

-

 

Notes for the day:

- Still sick and exhausted unfortunately

- Went to the thermas felt so good

 

Meditation: -
No alcohol: -

No coffee: ✓

6000 Steps: ✓

Nerves: ✓