No power in the 'verse can stop us

[Snow Walker]

I'm pretty much a newb who has been dabbling at this for a bit.  I am also making my way down this path of fitness and I'd be happy to offer encouragement and support. Sometimes I need a push in the direction of a little more structure, but I like advice and I'm open to it.  I have fitness goals - namely get strong enough to do pull ups, deadlift my body weight, and lose 60lbs this year.  

 

That being said, most of my support is long distance (family in another state) while the people close, namely my husband is doing his best to be encouraging. His family (in state) is my biggest group of haters. He is remodeling the house with his father who is very unsupportive and dismissive of me. It's been a long haul for this introverted homebody to watch the guys tear my house to studs and redo pipes and electric. I was pregnant for 8 months of it and now they're still going strong and my baby is a 9-month old. I hope that doesn't sound like I am too whiny to be an encourager. I guess what I mean is that I think it makes me tenacious.  I dig deep to ground and encourage myself and my husband, but I am looking for someone to talk fitness shop and encouragement and goals with away from the rest of things.  

 

I'm 29 and working my way back from 210lbs to a weight I can't remember being (150lbs.) I work full time and then have the little one, but I squeeze in workouts wherever I can. It's not easy and it's not my dream (which is to have my space and some peace n quiet with a home gym and fancy equipment of course!) but it's a damn sight better than it could be and I am proud of myself.  And all I'm going to worry about is moving forward. So if you're looking for an online partner or someone to touch base with from time to time, let me know. If you're good or I don't sound like a match to where you're headed, that's cool too. Thanks for reading. Keep being awesome! 

[Trixie Falsae]

Shiny!

 

Hi! I don't have any local health buddies, but I'm pretty self motivated. It sucks that your in-laws are so negative, especially since they are so close. It there anything your husband can do to intervene?

 

I'm 32 and my youngest hobbit is 5 months. I only work part time at the moment, but I have worked full time while trying to keep active. I'd love to touch base with you! What is your diet and fitness routine like?

[Snow Walker]

Hi Trixie! 

 

Congrats on the little hobbit!  I found mind brought me way more joy than I ever thought possible. He also made me feel more courageous because I was terrified for the first few months that something would go wrong and I would not know what to do.  I feel more confident. I'm still shy, but I suck it up and do the stuff I need to most of the time. 

 

I'm kind of jealous that you are only working part time. Some moms love full time and others struggle with it. Personally I could do with a little more time, but I make it work. But tell me, how does working out look for you? Here's what it is for me:

 

I started working out the tail end of November. 3 days per week, strength and body weight exercises at home (couldn't bring myself to leave the house with the lil one at home). Foam rolling and dynamic warm up beforehand. I have a knee injury I can't afford to exacerbate so I was trying to be smart. In January I kicked it up to 3 days of strength and 3 days of Yoga.  So far I consistently get at least 5 of those per week. I've only been 100% successful once. 

 

I wish the in-laws were different too and that the house could come together faster. My husband gets treated the same as me, maybe a little worse because he gets a lot of guilt trips. (I just don't take any of them.) I have asked him to consider doing the work alone or hiring a professional, but he is determined to do the remodel with his dad. So I am working out to manage stress and build mental strength and clarity to deal with the situation. We estimate the remodel should be done in a year. I try to remember it's a small part of a bigger whole.  I'm working on what I can change and trying to let go of what I can't.  And making the most of every moment I have with my small family.

[WolfDreamer]

Just keep being awesome. It sounds like you're making great strides towards becoming healthier. As for the in-laws, talk to your husband. They are his parents, but you are his wife. I don't want to incite conflict, but he should defend you when necessary in a way that is firm enough to say, "Hey, she's my wife," while also still respecting his parents. The first few years of my marriage were tough because my wife and mother are both strong-willed and strong-hearted women, so they often clashed. I kept my mouth shut too many times until my wife called me on it. Your spouse should be your best friend and the most important person in your life. But I'm not a marriage counselor, so... But I feel he should stick up for you when it's necessary. His life is with you now, not with his parents.

[Snow Walker]

Hey Wolfen, 

 

Thank you for the encouragement.   It's good to hear other people have been through similar stuff and made positive changes.  I'm going to keep hoping that my husband and I get to that point and keep working to keep my heart open for it.   And gently see how I can encourage him toward steping in with his parents.

 

Have an awesome day! 

[Violetta]

Welcome! Mine are 5, 8 and 9 now, but I definitely remember those days! Do you live in a walkable area? I took mine on LOTS of walks when they were little (I read once that pushing a stroller can burn up to 50 percent more calories than walking alone!). And if you're interested in running, you could look into a jogging stroller. When my girlfriends also had babies, we would meet at the park and take walks and catch up while getting a little exercise in.

 

I also do a lot of workouts at home. I like Jessica Smith and Fitness Blender, both of which you can find on YouTube  

[Mr.Six]

Hello and welcome!  I've got two little ones (2 and 7 mo) and my fair share of family conflict (currently with both my in-laws and my own parents), but it sounds like you are handling things very well under the circumstances!

[Trixie Falsae]

@Snow Walker,

 

I worked full time up until I had my most recent hobbit. Then we decided to have me work on weekends and home school the older hobbits.

 

I have never, ever worked out anywhere except my own home. I've always had too many hobbits to care for and just worked out when they were in bed or playing. That and I don't want to pay a gym fee. I have better things to do with my money.

 

Right now I'm focusing more on better eating so I'm not a strict about my workouts and I would eventually like to be. I'm doing great with my eating so I am still seeing a lot of improvements. My ideal would be 3 days of cardio such as walking (I strap the little one in a carrier, have one in the stroller so I get extra work. The bonus is the older hobbits get out and walking too), dance, or power cleaning (I work pretty hard at it and days like today when I spends 3+ hours moving and cleaning, I call it a workout [Wow it this turning into a grammar nightmare]). I also want to do 3 days of either body weight or dumbbell exercises. Right now I'm doing good to get one in, but small steps. I really need to start recording and tracking. Charts and graphs make me happy. 

[The Spider]

Nobody has posted in this for a couple of weeks...  You can't stop the signal!  How's the workout going, @Snow Walker?

[ChirpyBird]

On 1/17/2017 at 6:57 PM, Snow Walker said:

I'm pretty much a newb who has been dabbling at this for a bit.  I am also making my way down this path of fitness and I'd be happy to offer encouragement and support. Sometimes I need a push in the direction of a little more structure, but I like advice and I'm open to it.  I have fitness goals - namely get strong enough to do pull ups, deadlift my body weight, and lose 60lbs this year.  

 

That being said, most of my support is long distance (family in another state) while the people close, namely my husband is doing his best to be encouraging. His family (in state) is my biggest group of haters. He is remodeling the house with his father who is very unsupportive and dismissive of me. It's been a long haul for this introverted homebody to watch the guys tear my house to studs and redo pipes and electric. I was pregnant for 8 months of it and now they're still going strong and my baby is a 9-month old. I hope that doesn't sound like I am too whiny to be an encourager. I guess what I mean is that I think it makes me tenacious.  I dig deep to ground and encourage myself and my husband, but I am looking for someone to talk fitness shop and encouragement and goals with away from the rest of things.  

 

I'm 29 and working my way back from 210lbs to a weight I can't remember being (150lbs.) I work full time and then have the little one, but I squeeze in workouts wherever I can. It's not easy and it's not my dream (which is to have my space and some peace n quiet with a home gym and fancy equipment of course!) but it's a damn sight better than it could be and I am proud of myself.  And all I'm going to worry about is moving forward. So if you're looking for an online partner or someone to touch base with from time to time, let me know. If you're good or I don't sound like a match to where you're headed, that's cool too. Thanks for reading. Keep being awesome! 

 

I'd love to! Sounds like you have fantastic goals.  Are you doing a challenge this time around? If so, what is it?

[Snow Walker]

Thanks for the encouragement everyone!  I'm sorry I haven't been keeping up here.  How are things going for Challenge 2? 

 

I'll admit I burned out on challenge 1 and instead of keeping up with all my weights and workouts I gave in and walked instead... a lot!  I didn't lose as much weight because of that, but I used the time to learn about calories and macros and I am back at it in a Challenge2.  

 

This time I'm striving to clean up my uncontrolled eating by getting reasonably close to my macros and calories, lifting 2-3 times per week, doing yoga or mobility 3-4 days per week and trying to get in some writing.  I'm not hitting all of them full cylinder this time.  The writing didn't happen this past week and neither did the mobility.  However, I have finally lost a full 10lbs, counting from Dec 2, 2016.  We had Christmas, my birthday, and Valentine's Day to get through, so I'm willing to call overall progress a win!  

 

Some weeks I lost ground, it was hard not to feel like a loser and then eat junk food.  My accountability buddy kicked my ass and kept me moving forward along with my why.  I need to spend some more time in the academy so my progress gets tracked and I actually level up, instead of wandering out in the bush.  I need to suck it up and do my measurements.  They scare me, even though my clothes fit better and I am liking how I look.  So, I'll get back in the path and see what my progress continues to be.  I like to follow the path, really I do, I just don't have the hang of it yet.  I'm pleased with the results though.  I'm finally back into my college sized jeans, although not yet as small as I was pre-pregnancy.  I still have 2 months to get back there before he turns 1. I may not make it, but I'm going to lift, eat, and train like I know I can get there.   

 

I had my other half help me start on a side project and we got half of a DIY weight lifting rack constructed from wood.  I hope to have that together and in place by this weekend so I can start moving more weight.  It will also give me a pull up bar.  I can't do any but if I don't at least hang there and struggle, I will stay where I am at.  I know I will eventually hit a brick wall where I find my "max weight" and then have to fight to make gains over longer periods of time, but as a newbie I am loving the honeymoon period of being able to keep adding weight and finally getting in the swing soreness and recovery, which isn't too bad.  

 

So tell me where you are at?  What are your wins?  Where are you going?  What destinations have you found among these far flung stars and what does your signal say? 

[Vendettaressa]

There are SO many things I can relate to here! My newest hobbit is three months old, and my older hobbit will be 2 in June. I don't quite have the energy or stamina to keep up with them, but I finally made the decision to actually start trying here. For me, a decision is a very big win indeed. I hope to convince my husband (a great supporter, but the in-laws care for the children while we're at work and they are MAJOR detractors as well) that the Academy is just what we're looking for in order to jump start our health again. I'm back in my pre-pregnancy jeans already, but if I'm being brutally honest, I only gained one pant size and didn't have to wear maternity jeans until I was seven months pregnant and my son came three weeks early. I'm just chubby. Very chubby. Like 240 pounds at 5'5'' chubby. And I hate myself for it. But I'm making changes now. I barely eat at all right now, which is not helping my health, so the plan is to start eating one REAL meal a day, actually drink more than three glasses of water a week, and start basic yoga and meditation to increase flexibility and reduce "busy syndrome". I've already started slowly losing weight thanks to the lifting I've been doing (AKA moving into a new apartment!), and increasing my strength. 

 

Could you define macros for me? I've never heard of such a thing. 

[Snow Walker]

@Vendettaressa,

 

Welcome and congrats on the newest hobbit!  I appreciate your honesty and I hope that you will continue with it.  I can't imagine only gaining one pant size during pregnancy, but my experience was different. I started out around 189lbs and ended pregnancy over 250lbs.  I was surprised by how exhausted I was in the post-partum period.  The fact that your second is three months and you are already talking about getting back into fitness is impressive!  At that point I had given up and was "subsisting" on protein shakes and ho-hos.  My husband doesn't cook and I could make it half-way through prepping my breakfast omelet before the little one needed either to be fed or changed again while I was home alone.  I gave up eating them burned and just ate junk.  It was hard not to give up and judge myself for having no willpower and being so weak and fat.  So that's what I did for a bit.  It's a hard path, but I hope that you can come to a place where you appreciate your strengths and beauty again.   

 

From what my coworkers say it can be tricky when family helps with children.  Not necessarily bad, just a mix of blessing and boundary conflicts.  I wish you the best of patience and perseverance while working through that area of your life.  As you undertake these steps in your life, choosing one real meal per day, and making efforts to health and fitness, know that you are not alone.  You can always re-start and re-spawn.  I have had to do that several times since starting my journey in November/December.  In the 10 months since I had my son, I've managed to make it to 202lbs.  At 5'8", the BMI calculators and doctors usually tell me that I should weigh something like "130-150lbs" or if I'm lucky 160lbs.  It's hard not to judge myself for where I am at.  So while I keep walking toward where I want to be, I keep the progress in my review mirror and I check it regularly.  Part of my goal this year is to try to get my weight down to 160lbs (it gets me from the obese category to normal/acceptable weight category as far as my health insurance provider is concerned, which impacts my premiums with my employer).  I know that I still have a little more than 40lbs to go and that seems overwhelming to me.  So at first I celebrated being able to sustain 5lbs lost, and now 10lbs lost; and each one is like a small victory and decreases the number yet to go.  I guess I'm a glass half-full type of gal, but it doesn't mean that when I get down on myself I don't do a little bit, or a lot, of unhealthy eating and self-sabotage.       

 

I've learned a lot since starting this journey.  Macros are one thing I decided to incorporate into my diet tracking.  They are a little complicated at first and seemed intimidating until I learned more and had some practice.  That being said, you don't have to track them to see progress, and NerdFitness suggests moving toward a Paleo style of eating which would still work with counting macros, but is not where I am eating yet.  I just wanted to be upfront that I have not pursued exactly what is being suggested in the academy so that if you are working on it, I don't confuse or hinder you.  Macros refers to macronutrients and I'm still a newbie so if what I'm saying doesn't add up - check it with someone else who may know a little more than I do, or do a little more research online.  When I say I'm tracking my macros or at least working to be mindful of them, it means that in addition to targeting a set number of calories, I am also watching what percentage comes from protein, fat, and carbohydrates.  At this point I am looking to keep that to about 164 grams of protein, 123 grams of carbs, and 54 grams of fat.  Some days I am a little over, others a little under.  I never used to get quite enough protein and I was shunning carbs but running wild with fat.  Not surprisingly, I had trouble lowering my percent body fat, which is over 30%.  The other thing that adding macros does is help me to see that if I want to eat some ice cream or another treat, I can fit it into my calories, but I should eat a little less fat/carbs in my other meals.  For example, full fat yogurt, avocados, salmon, and ice cream shouldn't all happen on the same day for me.  Before, I would tell myself that I was okay for the ice cream because I had been good with the other three items that were healthy.  Now, I'm working to adjust my perspective.  There are some foods that are better for you and others you should eat sparingly or not at all; but I am trying to let myself enjoy the food I eat without feeling like I need to be guilty or that I should get a pass because I ate "healthy" the rest of the day. 

 

Figuring macros takes a little bit of math. That's why I am ball parking.  MyFitnessPal will track them for you in realtime for a fee.  I'm cheap, lazy, and have found another app I prefer for calorie tracking, so I don't use that one.  Instead I am using a spreadsheet.  I looked up the foods I usually eat, or better yet read the labels on the brands I had in the fridge and cupboard.  Then I created a spreadsheet on the computer.  One page has nothing but different foods, their calories, protein, fat, and carb grams.  The other sheet has my meal plan.  It's split into breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, and pre-bed snack (because that's what works for me... although I'd love another midmorning snack, I never seem to eat it).  I set up the meal plan page to calculate the totals and compare them to my goals, basically doing the math for me.  I copied the foods into the meal plan from the other page and tweaked it until the totals lined up as closely as I could get them with food I knew I would eat.  The copy-paste feature lets me build my own list of frequent foods over time without losing the data.  It took a little bit to get it up and running (maybe 2-4 hours total between understanding, calculating, researching, tweaking) but now I can adjust meal plans for the week in 15-30 minutes.  I print them and do my best to follow.  But if there is pizza at work and I know I had a low-fat, low-carb breakfast and I can also adjust dinner, I'll eat a serving of pizza if I want it without stressing or re-calculating. 

 

The thing I like best about it, is that there's really no focus on one thing as bad or better than the others.  It's not against carbs or against fat or pushing you to eat protein until your eyes fall out.  After 6 weeks, I can get protein on target no problem, but I still tend to be over in fat and under in carbs if left to my own guesswork.  As I learn my tendencies I can work with them and accept myself for who I am.  I fail at least a few days on a weekly basis but overall, I'm able to love myself and enjoy food while losing weight. 

[Vendettaressa]

Well, I figure moving to subsisting on protein shakes is a step up from subsisting on ice cubes, so small steps, right?  To be fair, fitness is something I've been talking myself out of for almost a full year now. I wanted to get back into it after my first kid but I was always too sick and tired, and then too pregnant again. It usually takes me at least a year to decide I want to do something, and after my second kid almost all the migraines and high blood pressure and illness vanished. 

 

... Your weight actually affects your premiums with your healthcare provider?! Talk about things they need to include in adulting school... 

 

Macros are fascinating!!! I'm impressed you have the dedication to stick to a spreadsheet. That's amazing! <3 164 grams of protein is A LOT... I'm lucky if I get 700 calories a day without soda and anywhere remotely close to 50g of protein. Carbs are my downfall... I have that weird body type where it just sticks to me and triples in size. So I just don't eat because I can never find anything I will eat that I can prepare with a toddler on my leg and a newborn screaming for a bottle that still qualifies as remotely healthy or isn't covered in chocolate! How did you determine what your goals were going to be for the amount of protein, carbs, and fat?

[Trixie Falsae]

On 2/25/2017 at 8:54 PM, Vendettaressa said:

Well, I figure moving to subsisting on protein shakes is a step up from subsisting on ice cubes, so small steps, right?  To be fair, fitness is something I've been talking myself out of for almost a full year now. I wanted to get back into it after my first kid but I was always too sick and tired, and then too pregnant again. It usually takes me at least a year to decide I want to do something, and after my second kid almost all the migraines and high blood pressure and illness vanished. 

 

... Your weight actually affects your premiums with your healthcare provider?! Talk about things they need to include in adulting school... 

 

Macros are fascinating!!! I'm impressed you have the dedication to stick to a spreadsheet. That's amazing! <3 164 grams of protein is A LOT... I'm lucky if I get 700 calories a day without soda and anywhere remotely close to 50g of protein. Carbs are my downfall... I have that weird body type where it just sticks to me and triples in size. So I just don't eat because I can never find anything I will eat that I can prepare with a toddler on my leg and a newborn screaming for a bottle that still qualifies as remotely healthy or isn't covered in chocolate! How did you determine what your goals were going to be for the amount of protein, carbs, and fat?

 

Calculating macros depends on what your eating philosophy is. Typically I see a recommended 40%protein/40%car/20%fat. That changes if you are going paleo or have other considerations.

 

I only count every once in a while to check my progress. I typically just use the plate method. At least half veggie, a quarter protein, quarter carbs. Even if I make a casserole I sometimes make a side veggie as well.

 

I know it is so, so hard to take care of yourself when you have tiny babies and are overwhelmed. I think the first 6 months are most exhausting and frustrating and it really gets better after one year. What helps me are planning my meals the day before. My breakfast is fairly consistent, I usually have an egg. Lunch is something easy to grab so either leftovers or fruit. I plan dinners weekly and try to make enough to have leftovers.  You could even make a bunch of homemade protein/granola bars to grab quickly so you are eating something that doesn't have a ton of sugar. Hard boiled eggs and cheese cubes are easy too.

 

When I first started on the wellness journey it was because of my hobbits. I wanted to be able to play with them and keep up with them. Obesity was a risk factor I wasn't willing to accept anymore. After a bit I realized how much I was enjoying it and gave myself permission to do it for me. It was honestly at that point that everything fell into place and I started seeing more progress and had the motivation to really look at my diet and make needed changes. It is perfectly acceptable to give yourself permission to care for yourself. You may be caring for others, but you are the only one caring for you. It is very important to take small breaks for self care, especially as a mother. It also helped clear up any lingering depression and motivated me to push myself in other ways.

 

Baby Hobbit just turned 7 months. I'm -20lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight. I gained 40lbs with Hobbit #4 due to depression and eating horribly. Then I gained some more after having her. I stayed steady for about a year and a half, started clearing up my diet and lost 10lb. Then I got pregnant with Hobbit #5. I really cleaned up my eating in the 2nd-3rd trimester and carried it over to postpartum. I notice that what I eat has more of an impact on my overall health than anything. When I eat junk I feel horrible and don't want to do anything. If I could get to where I eat well AND exercise I would be great, but I struggle getting workouts in. Right now its easiest to take everyone for an afternoon walk and not worry about a dedicated "workout". I really need to start tracking my intake. I think I'm doing pretty good but I know I let myself sneak treats too much.

[Snow Walker]

Wow!  Okay, you weren't exaggerating about barely eating at all.  Depending how much soda you're drinking those calories sound scary low.  I would encourage you to keep taking small steps and setting goals for yourself.  It's perfectly fine to go at your own pace.  You mentioned that it took a year for you to get to this point of being ready to start, and that makes these first steps exciting and valuable.  You also mentioned feeling poorly and some health conditions as well.  I think you are on the right track with small steps.  You do not want to overdo anything and get injured or fail,  that doesn't help you at all.  I have to remind myself of this frequently, as I have old injuries of my own and plan on having more kids (which means more weight gain and body changes all over again).  One of the best things about NF is the encouragement to do what you can, to embrace where you are, figure out where you want to be, and get started on the journey.  

 

Steve Kamb has built a really good program that breaks down things into little steps and makes it simple to progress.  I'm still working through his book Level Up Your Life, but I have it on audio from Audible so it's on my phone.  It's great for washing dishes or when I am stuck in traffic, because it helps me to think about mindset and perspective.  I'm short on time like you are, so I try to sneak it in where I can.  The mindset portion of the academy has been invaluable!  It took a while for me to work through and I still haven't finished it, but I learned a ton.

 

Gamifying my my life has helped with motivation too.  One of the first NF articles that resonated with me was about choosing my superhero and taking steps to pretend that I was making choices that would make me more like my alter ego.  

 

As for the macros, I read Thinner Leaner Stronger by Michael Matthews and got the recommendations from there.  These are his suggestions for women who are over 30% body fat, to help with decreasing body fat.  His book explained how to calculate my percent body muscle and my total daily caloric expenditure.  I used those to target my total calories, but you can find the same online from calorie calculators.  I just looked at Mike Matthews' website the other day and I'm not sure it gives the same vibe as I got from the book, also an audio.  That's not to say they are contradictory, but the pics of thin ripped chicks on the website isn't something that would have gotten me to read the book.  I read the book to help me understand how my body uses food and builds muscle.  I do secretary work for a medical company and have developed a sort of affection for the medical/scientific explanations of things.

 

 I don't know if this book would truly help you or overwhelm you, that's up to you.  The thing that seems most important to me when I hear your replies is for you to not get discouraged, to figure out what works for you, what interests you, and then to learn about it by giving it a try.  I think that by taking the steps to add one healthy meal to your day and maybe make one or two other small changes, you will be surprised where you end up.  The little wins give us the fuel to move toward the bigger successes over time.  I think you have a great opportunity ahead to decide what you want, to move toward it, and to defy your old expectations.  I'm excited for you, honestly and truly.    Please keep me posted, because I'd love to celebrate your successes and offer any suggestions/info if you want.

[Snow Walker]

I didn't see Trixie Falsae's response until I posted mine, but I think she's right on!  

[Vendettaressa]

 

13 hours ago, Trixie Falsae said:

When I first started on the wellness journey it was because of my hobbits. I wanted to be able to play with them and keep up with them. Obesity was a risk factor I wasn't willing to accept anymore. After a bit I realized how much I was enjoying it and gave myself permission to do it for me. It was honestly at that point that everything fell into place and I started seeing more progress and had the motivation to really look at my diet and make needed changes. It is perfectly acceptable to give yourself permission to care for yourself. You may be caring for others, but you are the only one caring for you. It is very important to take small breaks for self care, especially as a mother. It also helped clear up any lingering depression and motivated me to push myself in other ways.

 

Baby Hobbit just turned 7 months. I'm -20lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight. I gained 40lbs with Hobbit #4 due to depression and eating horribly. Then I gained some more after having her. I stayed steady for about a year and a half, started clearing up my diet and lost 10lb. Then I got pregnant with Hobbit #5. I really cleaned up my eating in the 2nd-3rd trimester and carried it over to postpartum. I notice that what I eat has more of an impact on my overall health than anything. When I eat junk I feel horrible and don't want to do anything. If I could get to where I eat well AND exercise I would be great, but I struggle getting workouts in. Right now its easiest to take everyone for an afternoon walk and not worry about a dedicated "workout". I really need to start tracking my intake. I think I'm doing pretty good but I know I let myself sneak treats too much.

 

I TOTALLY understand where you're coming from. My toddler is almost 21 months old, and I don't have the energy to keep up with him or play with him. I feel so bad, I really want to do better for him. Just a walk every day has started clearing my head! I'm hoping to start eating again soon and doing better...

 

12 hours ago, Snow Walker said:

Wow!  Okay, you weren't exaggerating about barely eating at all.  Depending how much soda you're drinking those calories sound scary low.  I would encourage you to keep taking small steps and setting goals for yourself.  It's perfectly fine to go at your own pace.  You mentioned that it took a year for you to get to this point of being ready to start, and that makes these first steps exciting and valuable.  You also mentioned feeling poorly and some health conditions as well.  I think you are on the right track with small steps.  You do not want to overdo anything and get injured or fail,  that doesn't help you at all.  I have to remind myself of this frequently, as I have old injuries of my own and plan on having more kids (which means more weight gain and body changes all over again).  One of the best things about NF is the encouragement to do what you can, to embrace where you are, figure out where you want to be, and get started on the journey.  

 

Gamifying my my life has helped with motivation too.  One of the first NF articles that resonated with me was about choosing my superhero and taking steps to pretend that I was making choices that would make me more like my alter ego.  

 

As for the macros, I read Thinner Leaner Stronger by Michael Matthews and got the recommendations from there.  These are his suggestions for women who are over 30% body fat, to help with decreasing body fat.  His book explained how to calculate my percent body muscle and my total daily caloric expenditure.  I used those to target my total calories, but you can find the same online from calorie calculators.  I just looked at Mike Matthews' website the other day and I'm not sure it gives the same vibe as I got from the book, also an audio.  That's not to say they are contradictory, but the pics of thin ripped chicks on the website isn't something that would have gotten me to read the book.  I read the book to help me understand how my body uses food and builds muscle.  I do secretary work for a medical company and have developed a sort of affection for the medical/scientific explanations of things.

 

 I don't know if this book would truly help you or overwhelm you, that's up to you.  The thing that seems most important to me when I hear your replies is for you to not get discouraged, to figure out what works for you, what interests you, and then to learn about it by giving it a try.  I think that by taking the steps to add one healthy meal to your day and maybe make one or two other small changes, you will be surprised where you end up.  The little wins give us the fuel to move toward the bigger successes over time.  I think you have a great opportunity ahead to decide what you want, to move toward it, and to defy your old expectations.  I'm excited for you, honestly and truly.    Please keep me posted, because I'd love to celebrate your successes and offer any suggestions/info if you want.

 

... Well, I used to drink maybe 16 oz of Dr. Pepper a day. That's about 200 more calories according to MyFitnessPal. so around 900 calories daily. It is considered dangerous low, but I couldn't do any better. it was definitely causing a lot of muscle weakness and blacking out, which with a newborn in the house... definitely not safe. that's about the time I decided I'd try to do better for real. I will say though, that book sounds brilliant. I'm not a huge fan of website marketing, but medical explanations sound amazing. 

 

I love RPGs, so this was literally the absolute best thing to ever come across. Speaking of, Rising Heroes is going live in a few days... I REALLY want to try... but I don't know what the expectations will be like and I don't want to get overwhelmed and give up. 

 

 

EDIT: SOooooooo a coworker brought beignets in to work today and I had six of them... turns out that's a thousand calories! 0.o Talk about empty nutrition... 

[Snow Walker]

14 hours ago, Vendettaressa said:

I TOTALLY understand where you're coming from. My toddler is almost 21 months old, and I don't have the energy to keep up with him or play with him. I feel so bad, I really want to do better for him. Just a walk every day has started clearing my head! I'm hoping to start eating again soon and doing better...

 

 

... Well, I used to drink maybe 16 oz of Dr. Pepper a day. That's about 200 more calories according to MyFitnessPal. so around 900 calories daily. It is considered dangerous low, but I couldn't do any better. it was definitely causing a lot of muscle weakness and blacking out, which with a newborn in the house... definitely not safe. that's about the time I decided I'd try to do better for real. I will say though, that book sounds brilliant. I'm not a huge fan of website marketing, but medical explanations sound amazing. 

 

I love RPGs, so this was literally the absolute best thing to ever come across. Speaking of, Rising Heroes is going live in a few days... I REALLY want to try... but I don't know what the expectations will be like and I don't want to get overwhelmed and give up. 

 

 

EDIT: SOooooooo a coworker brought beignets in to work today and I had six of them... turns out that's a thousand calories! 0.o Talk about empty nutrition... 

 

Hiya and I hope your day is going/has gone well, depending when you read this.  

 

By looking at your eating habits and your desire to be active and walk, you're already doing a lot more than before.  Keep up the walks when you can and see where that goes.  I haven't tried Rising Heroes, so I can't say anything there.  Reach out and see what the support has to say on that one.  With how new this journey is for you it could be great, or it could be something you build up to in a few months.  I think it looks really cool.

 

The more active my hobbit gets, the more I will understand about where you ladies are at.  Right now all I have to worry about is crawling, which is nowhere near him running around getting in to stuff.  It's an adjustment I am not looking forward to.  

 

The fact that that you are trying and that you are concerned about keeping up with your hobbits says a lot.  You're looking to make changes because you love them and you want something better.  I'm not sure there is a perfect version of any of us, one where we are super-moms with awesome careers, and we meet everything we feel we should do.  But at the heart of it, to really care and to do our best-in-the-moment loving and living is the real win.  

 

You have a lot on your plate.  It sounds like you see the things that you want to fix more quickly maybe than the parts you like and want to keep.  I trash bed my brain that way too, and it is hard to find and focus on the things I do like.  As you explore what your journey looks like for you, embrace the parts that make it yours.  Find what makes you happy with yourself and build on it.  I know that sounds like sappy feel-good logic, and it might not help.  However, I found that it helped me to give myself a little bit of breathing room when I needed it, to keep from calling myself a failure and a loser and giving up.  If you love RPGs and taking walks or joining Rising Heroes is where you find your happy place, own that and rock it.    Don't compare yourself to other people and let that get you down.  You may find that things you try don't work. I have failed a lot and I'll fail more.  I try to learn from it, to laugh at if I need to, to let myself cry too. 

 

Plan a few small steps and keep taking them.  Define your version of small, repeatable steps.  We'll be here to cheer you on.

 

[ChirpyBird]

15 hours ago, Vendettaressa said:

 

 

I TOTALLY understand where you're coming from. My toddler is almost 21 months old, and I don't have the energy to keep up with him or play with him. I feel so bad, I really want to do better for him. Just a walk every day has started clearing my head! I'm hoping to start eating again soon and doing better...

 

 

... Well, I used to drink maybe 16 oz of Dr. Pepper a day. That's about 200 more calories according to MyFitnessPal. so around 900 calories daily. It is considered dangerous low, but I couldn't do any better. it was definitely causing a lot of muscle weakness and blacking out, which with a newborn in the house... definitely not safe. that's about the time I decided I'd try to do better for real. I will say though, that book sounds brilliant. I'm not a huge fan of website marketing, but medical explanations sound amazing. 

 

I love RPGs, so this was literally the absolute best thing to ever come across. Speaking of, Rising Heroes is going live in a few days... I REALLY want to try... but I don't know what the expectations will be like and I don't want to get overwhelmed and give up. 

 

 

EDIT: SOooooooo a coworker brought beignets in to work today and I had six of them... turns out that's a thousand calories! 0.o Talk about empty nutrition... 

 

Rising Heroes so far is awesome, and not overwhelming at all. Basically after you read the mission updates, here are my missions right now: do a workout with their video for 20 minutes three times before the deadline, try a new veggie, visit a historical landmark, and talk to 3 people you normally wouldn't. Not that hard at all.  The Rebellion would love to have you!

[Vendettaressa]

Official verdict on Rising Heroes: Three days in and it's awesome. Quests are easy but awesome. 

 

 

On 2/28/2017 at 9:47 AM, Snow Walker said:

The more active my hobbit gets, the more I will understand about where you ladies are at.  Right now all I have to worry about is crawling, which is nowhere near him running around getting in to stuff.  It's an adjustment I am not looking forward to.  

 

The fact that that you are trying and that you are concerned about keeping up with your hobbits says a lot.  You're looking to make changes because you love them and you want something better.  I'm not sure there is a perfect version of any of us, one where we are super-moms with awesome careers, and we meet everything we feel we should do.  But at the heart of it, to really care and to do our best-in-the-moment loving and living is the real win.  

 

You have a lot on your plate.  It sounds like you see the things that you want to fix more quickly maybe than the parts you like and want to keep.  I trash bed my brain that way too, and it is hard to find and focus on the things I do like.  As you explore what your journey looks like for you, embrace the parts that make it yours.  Find what makes you happy with yourself and build on it.  I know that sounds like sappy feel-good logic, and it might not help.  However, I found that it helped me to give myself a little bit of breathing room when I needed it, to keep from calling myself a failure and a loser and giving up.  If you love RPGs and taking walks or joining Rising Heroes is where you find your happy place, own that and rock it.    Don't compare yourself to other people and let that get you down.  You may find that things you try don't work. I have failed a lot and I'll fail more.  I try to learn from it, to laugh at if I need to, to let myself cry too. 

 

Plan a few small steps and keep taking them.  Define your version of small, repeatable steps.  We'll be here to cheer you on.

 

 

I was actually thrilled when my first started crawling. He started moving around the living room and I could go to other rooms without him screaming because he was left on the floor, he would follow me. One of the biggest problems I have right now is my oldest is obsessed with rearranging any and all furniture. -.- Fortunately, we moved, and there's a very easy way to distract him from that now: climbing stairs. He lives on them, practically. The downside to his obsession with stairs is I have to go up and down them too... -.-