Luciana Valerosa Culming - Searchin for continuity

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

March/April – Continuity

 

The zombies are still roaming the streets, so I'll continue what I've been doing so far and try to not lose my brain. I only changed my goals little by little since the beginning of the year building up momentum. This challenge will only be harder because of some milestones I set myself and my first course will start on April the first. The course has high reading requirements, that's why I try to get as much as possible done about two projects, I want to hand in on May 15.

 

Goal One: Overcome the Virus and scavage enough for food

With this goal I try to get healthier and improve my immune system. I'm getting a cold frequently and again I'm starting a challenge with a sore throat.. Therefore I’m trying to build some healthy habits and reduce unhealthy diet habits. I'm also trying to lose weight at the moment. These goals helped me to watch my portion size and I changed my regular meals. Usually I was skipping lunch and eating a lot for dinner. He usually get's back from work between 7 pm and 8 pm. We usually don't get dinner before 8 pm. Now I'm regularly eating a small lunch with my study buddy and have a smaller dinner portion in the evening with a green salad.

 

- drink 3,5l a day

- 3 portions of freggies

- reduce unhelathy snacks and take away (not more then once a week)

                           

last challenge:

Quote

Goal 1
Zero week ✔✔✔✘✔✔✔
Week 1 ✔✘✔✔✘✔✔                                     83%
Week 2 ✔✔✔✘✔✘✔                                     71%
Week 3 ✔✘✔✔✘✔✔                                     83%
Week 4 ✘✔✔✔✔✘✘                                     66%
Score: ~76%   ~A-

 

Goal Two: Don't let them outrun you

I got back into walking regularly, but I didn't bild an indoor routine yet. I'll try to do 20 minutes of yoga, Tai Chi or light body weight exercises at least once a week in adition to my regular walking. Last challenge I tried to be able to walk the 2,4 km to the train station in less then 20 minutes again. On Monday 20th March I was in a real hurry and managed to get there in 17 minutes.

 

last challenge:

Quote

Goal 2

Zero week ✘✔✔✔✔✔✔

Week 1 ✔✔✔✔✔✘✔                                     86%
Week 2 ✘✔✔✘✔✔✔                                     71%
Week 3 ✔✔✔✔✔✔✘                                     85%
Week 4 ✔✔✔✘✔✘✔                                     85%
Score: ~82%  ~A

 

Goal Three: Get your stuff done and don't give in the lethargy 

I tried to convince myself to study almost daily and at least spent 15 hours a week on study related tasks. Last challenge I got in my 15 hours in 4 of five weeks. It's getting harder, because of organisational stuff, I have to handle for the next few weeks, but I'll try to stick to this schedule as long as possible.

 

last challenge

Quote

Goal 3
Zero week ✘✔✔✔✔✔✔                                          (13/15 hours)
Week 1 ✘✘✘✔✔✔✘                                    27%   (4/15 hours; C-)
Week 2 ✘✔✔✘✔✘✘                                    113%  (17/15 hours; A+)
Week 3 ✘✔✔✔✔✔✔                                    120%  (18/15 hours; A+)
Week 4 ✘✔✔✘✔✔✘                                    86%    (13/15 hours; A)
Score ~ 87%  ~A

 

Goal Four: To Do List 

This is an optional goal, so I won’t grade it. Instead of trying to get in five things and do some recreation, too. I'll try to get in some organisational stuff, housework and so on every day. At the moment I'm doing these things in the morning, when I get up at 7am or in the evening, when I get back from studying. Last challenge I often needed one day a week for housework, because of not doing things regularly. For the next four weeks I want to spent at least five days a week on working on my study projects, so I can't spent a whole day on housework and spending half the weekend on this stuff takes too much time from my recreation.

 

last challenge

Quote

Goal 4                                                    (without rating)
Zero week ✘✔✔✔✘✔✘
Week 1 ✘✘✘✘✘✘✘                                    
Week 2 ✘✘✘✘✔✔✘                                    
Week 3 ✘✘✘✘✘✘✔                                    
Week 4 ✔✘✘✔✘✘✘

Score:
Goal 1: 76% A-
Goal 2: 82% A
Goal 3: 87% A
            ~82%

 

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

Progress chart

 

unicode: ✔✘☐

 

Goal 1

Week 1 ✘✘✘✔✔✔✔                                     66% B

Week 2 ✔✘✘✘✔✔✘                                     50% C+

Week 3 ✔✘✘✔✔✔✘                                     66% B

Week 4 ✔✔✔✔✘✘✘                                     66% B

~62%   ~B

 

Goal 2

Week 1 ✘✔✔✔✔✔✔                                     86% A

Week 2 ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔                                     100% A

Week 3 ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔                                     100% A

Week 4 ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔                                     100% A

~96%  ~A

 

Goal 3                                          (55,5/60 hours)

Week 1 ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘                                    110%   (16,5/15 hours; A+)

Week 2 ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘                                    137%  (20,5/15 hours; A++)

Week 3 ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘                                    47%  (7/15 hours; C)

Week 4 ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘                                    77%    (11,5/15 hours; A-)

~ 92%  ~A

 

Goal 4                                                    (without rating)

Week 1 ✔✘✘✔✔✔✘                                    

Week 2 ✔✔✔✔✔✘✘                                    

Week 3 ✔✘✘✔✔✘✔                                    

Week 4 ✔✘✘✔✔✘✔                             

 

Score:

Goal 1: 62% B

Goal 2: 96% A

Goal 3: 92% A

            ~83%

 

A= 100% - 76%

B= 75% - 51%

C= 50% - 26%

D= 25% - 0%

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

☐✘✔

 

Week One

Goal 1: ✘✘✘✔✔✔✔

Goal 2: ✘✔✔✔✔✔✔   

Goal 3:  ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘

Goal 4: ✔✘✘✔✔✔✘

 

Goal1: Didn't drink enough on one day and binge ate on sweets during our Anime evening and on the next day Sarah made pancakes. Shark week really wasn't good for my eating habits. Score: 4/6 days with good eating habits ~ 66% ~ B

 

Goal2: Walked Monday to Saturday, got in one yoga session on Monday and did my five Tibetans on Tuesday. But somehow I was really distracted during the exercises and it was hard to focus on the movements. 6/7 ~ 86% ~ A

 

Goal3: Monday: 3 hours; Tuesday: 3 hours; Wednesday: 3,5; Thursday: 3 hour, Friday: 4 hours;

Score: 16,5 hours ~ 110% ~ A+

 

Goal4: To-do-list

Got things done in the morning and at night. I had to get through some backups. Unfortunately I couldn't find the files, I was searching for. At least I managed to reorganized my study files and found other useful stuff. I vowed to get regular backups done from now on. I think I lost some files I need, when I lost one of my USB sticks. 4/7 days

 

What I learned:

I have to get my backups and files in order. I'm waisting a lot of time on searching for importent documents. And now I have to spend time on redoing stuff and have to make things up regarding my last lessons. When I realized, that the files were gone, I wanted to smack my me from two years agon on the head. And I also learned, that I should pay more attention on my sleeping habits.

 

Mood: I'm still afraid, that I won't be able to get everything done in time. That makes it hard to relax.

[Kishi]

I know that feeling, where you're afraid that you can't get everything done in time. I don't know how you get around that, beyond trying to compartmentalize - keep your work at work and don't let it affect you when you're at home.

 

Good job getting all the training and study done!

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

12 hours ago, Kishi said:

 I don't know how you get around that, beyond trying to compartmentalize - keep your work at work and don't let it affect you when you're at home.

 

Thanks for writing to me, when you're so busy yourself.

 

I think that's why learning with my study buddy is so effektiv for me. We have two very different field of study. We're both working on our own stuff. What helps me is not only the sozialising part. It's also the change of lokations. That makes sticking to a timetable so much easier. When I'm at home I only do organisational stuff, like when I searched for my files, or writing mails to my teachers, or ... Last week I maged to do these things during my study hours and still get my work done. This week my tasks were a bit tougher. So I didn't get enough sleep.

 

That's the first time I'm setting myself strict deadline. The next offizial deadline is in June or so. But I set myself milestones and some of these milestones will determine weather I'm taking two more courses next semester. On the one hand I'm pressuring myself to get that stuff done in time, because it would be cool to finish all this stuff and be able to take these classes. On the other hand I know more classes will add up to the pressure. So somehow it feels like I'm testing myself.

 

When I got a mail from a teacher regarding one of my classes starting in April it really mixed me up. She told us to read a 50 pages text until the end of next week and repeat 10 other texts I already read for a test two or three years ago. I'm not sure, if I have to accept there's only so much time I can put into stuff.

 

I'm definitely not canceling meetings with friends. That's the only thing that's keeping me sane at the moment.

[Treva]

4 hours ago, Luciana Valerosa Culming said:

I think that's why learning with my study buddy is so effektiv for me. We have two very different field of study. We're both working on our own stuff. What helps me is not only the sozialising part. It's also the change of lokations. That makes sticking to a timetable so much easier.

This sounds great; I know for me, studying with someone who's not doing the same thing as I am helps me stay focused on my tasks, but I don't feel so isolated.  I'm all for this method of staying focused on work.

 

4 hours ago, Luciana Valerosa Culming said:

I'm definitely not canceling meetings with friends. That's the only thing that's keeping me sane at the moment.

Definitely don't!  There's that meditation quote of "if you don't think you have time to meditate at all, meditate for an hour."  Same principle--staying sane by being with people will help you be more productive when you're working. 

 

Sounds like you're working really hard and doing great.

[BlackTezca]

Awesome work during week one!  Really like how your format the check list and definitely don't cancel anything that keeps you sane!  Sane is most important!

[sarakingdom]

14 hours ago, Treva said:

staying sane by being with people will help you be more productive when you're working. 

 

It took me too long to learn this.

 

14 hours ago, Treva said:

There's that meditation quote of "if you don't think you have time to meditate at all, meditate for an hour." 

 

Holy shit.  I should try this.  It will be so painful.

[RedStone]

Hey hey hey! 2 weeks late? I've done worse  

 

Sooooo glad you're taking the time for some social!  However you like to decompress, it's so necessary during times of stress. There's only so much we can do.

 

The last week before my final I made a mandatory slumber party date with one of my ladies. It was a little stressful at times, it always feels like there's more and never enough time, but we slog through and do what we can. (I always think of it like a really long drive. Those last hours are rough and I wish I was already there, but there's nothing that can be done but keep on going till you get to the destination.)

 

Best of luck and I'll be peeking in!!

 

 

 

[Kishi]

Hey! I know I haven't been around, but I hope things have been going okay for you!

[BlackTezca]

Me too!  How are things m'dear?  Kicking ass, taking names?

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

On 13. April 2017 at 7:44 PM, BlackTezca said:

Me too!  How are things m'dear?  Kicking ass, taking names?

 

On 11. April 2017 at 4:22 PM, Kishi said:

Hey! I know I haven't been around, but I hope things have been going okay for you!

 

Damn, I love you guys. Don't sweat it. I haven't been around 10% of my goal. And somehow I'm only still with the monks because of you awsome people. My goals aren't monkish at all. And for the first time, I don't even feel like getting back into these hobbies. I hope that mood swing passes on.

 

On 5. April 2017 at 2:04 AM, RedStone said:

Sooooo glad you're taking the time for some social!  However you like to decompress, it's so necessary during times of stress. There's only so much we can do.

 

The last week before my final I made a mandatory slumber party date with one of my ladies. It was a little stressful at times, it always feels like there's more and never enough time, but we slog through and do what we can. (I always think of it like a really long drive. Those last hours are rough and I wish I was already there, but there's nothing that can be done but keep on going till you get to the destination.)

 

 

It was definitely the right call. During week four some of these meetings got canceled and although I tried to relax with some alone time, it just wasn't the same. My energy level was low the whole week and I had a hard time motivating myself to get at least something.

 

 

Short status update:

I'll have a look at my tracker later to confirm, but some things are already clear.

- I need to get back into the habit of planing my meals. My financial situation has changed a some and I paniced a little. So we didn't have much fresh fruit and vegetables at home. Gosh that was a little stupid.

- lost 2kg in four weeks.

- got my Workout in during the first two weeks. Then I was back to only walking. I should set appointments with my friend or get back into classes. I'm just not determined enough to get this done on my own.

- studying went well for the first three weeks. Then I got harder. I think Part was the not so good headspace the other reason was me not setting strickt to do lists. My next milestone is May 15, so I should set some specific goals for next challenge.

 

[Kishi]

I am sorry to hear that your financial situation changed. I know what that's like - going from something to nothing to something else that maybe isn't as good. It's freaking chaotic, and scary to boot.

 

But hey, that's what frozen food is for. It's good and cheap and probably fresher than the fresh stuff anyway.

 

And hey, we all go into training funks from time to time. The hardest part about martial arts is the starting. Once it's going again, if it's fun, it's pretty easy to keep going. But even if it's fun, if you stop, it's hard to start again. I'm relearning that myself now.

 

But! Doesn't matter if this is just a mood swing or a more permanent shift. You're still welcome with us as long as you like.

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

11 hours ago, Kishi said:

 

I am sorry to hear that your financial situation changed. I know what that's like - going from something to nothing to something else that maybe isn't as good. It's freaking chaotic, and scary to boot.

 

It's not nothing. I guess it won't be a real problem, it's just my stupid feelings that get in the way.  I don't want to depend too much on my parents or my boyfriend. It took me almost a month to talk about it with my bf. I mentioned it. But I guess, he doesn't know, what thoughts are occupying my head. My health insurance is going to increase gradually over the next year. My studies are draging on much too long now. I'm feeling guilty for depending on my father for so long. I feel guilty because my bf is already paying most of the rent.

 

I don't know... I think a big problem is, that I know, that my father and my boyfriends family and he himself would help out, if I said something. But I don't want to feel even more guilty. I guess if I stopped the panicing and calulated it through, I would even see, that I can reduce some expenses. At the moment it's just really hard to make decisions. And also I have to continue studying, to finish all this. If I let this get me, it'll just take longer... At least that's what I fear.

 

Sorry for the bad grammar. My English isn't that good when I'm nervous. The main reason, why I droped it as minor subject.

 

edit: I guess I'm being such a dramaqueen because of two reasons. One worrying without checking the facts properly is something I do often and old habits die hard. Two: I realize I'm falling back into a lot of old mechanics and I really don't like it how easily I let myself being manipulated by myself. Instead of procrastinating to get my chaotic thoughts into controle, I should check my facts properly. I'm going to update my excel sheet properly today when I get home. Then I'm going to think it through with a time limit before I talk about it properly with my boyfriend. And I'm going to call my family. I avoided calling all my family members for more then a month again and they'll already wonder why I ignored Easter. *sigh* Treva IS right. I really should start meditating again. Maybe I would have realized what had worried me so much earlier then.

[RedStone]

10 hours ago, Luciana Valerosa Culming said:

 

I don't know... I think a big problem is, that I know, that my father and my boyfriends family and he himself would help out, if I said something. But I don't want to feel even more guilty. I guess if I stopped the panicing and calulated it through, I would even see, that I can reduce some expenses. At the moment it's just really hard to make decisions. And also I have to continue studying, to finish all this. If I let this get me, it'll just take longer... At least that's what I fear.

 

Ohhh yess.... I know this one well! In my adult and married life I've done the hustle $$$ full time job, part time, and then had plenty of years of playing the supporting house wife role bringing in 0 income. Despite what Mr Red says, it can be demoralizing, and has made me feel that I can't spend this, I can't do that, I must always make cuts etc. It's a dance I've learned only happens in my own head, and when I enter into new stages of life, I take that into account... am I ok with more free time and less spending? Do I feel secure with myself in that it's ok that I'm not bringing in? Are there things I want to do that needs $$$ so I need to be bringing in more? (I'm looking at you aerial and circus gyms ) 

 

Not the same, I know, but I think it's probably a common anxiety, and there are cheat codes to make it work  Hopefully just a matter of really looking at the details of the situation and making decisions based on what is practical as well as useful for your head and heart. Always pulling for you boo! Hang in there, these ticks are always temporary... <3

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

7 hours ago, RedStone said:

Not the same, I know, but I think it's probably a common anxiety, and there are cheat codes to make it work  Hopefully just a matter of really looking at the details of the situation and making decisions based on what is practical as well as useful for your head and heart. Always pulling for you boo! Hang in there, these ticks are always temporary... <3

That's so true. Now that I've identified some of them, it's much easier to avoid certain thought patterns. And also I realized, that I was too hard on myself again. Of yourse I sometimes fall back into old habits, but that doesn't mean I'm not learning how to handle these things. Being gentle to myself is definitely part the process - not being gentle is part of the problem obviously *roleeyes*. Thanks for your encouragement and sharing your insight.

 

So we decided to cut some expenses together. And then I called my family and it was fine. They wondered a little, why I hadn't called on easter, but they didn't ask further questions. I'm feeling much more relaxed now and finally feel like I got something done again. I finished updating my excel sheet, did some homework for two hours and got some housework done. I'm still not done with outlining my challenge. I hope to get that done before the end of week 1. And I still have to post my challenge summary here.

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

☐✘✔

 

Week Two

Goal 1: ✔✘✘✘✔✔✘

Goal 2: ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔   

Goal 3:  ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘

Goal 4: ✔✔✔✔✔✘✘

 

Goal1: Didn't drink enough on one day and had snacks on three days. One snack day is allowed so I had three bad eating days. Score: 3/6 days with good eating habits ~ 50% ~ C+

 

Goal2: Walked every day, got in one 20 min yoga session and did my tibetans once. 7/7 ~ 100% ~ A

 

Goal3: Monday: 5 hours; Tuesday: 3 hours; Wednesday: 3,5; Thursday: 5 hour, Friday: 4 hours;

Score: 20,5 hours ~ 136,7% ~ A++

 

Goal4: To-do-list

Got stuff done 5/7 days

 

What I learned:

It's hard for me to controle snacking during my new role play session. One there are three other guys with me, who snack a lot during role play and it's hard to not get something, too. Two I should remember bringing some healthy and tasty alternatives with me, so I'll eat less junk food. And I should try not to snack the rest of the week. We're usually ordering, so it's hard to get a healthy lunch.

 

Mood: Can't remember.

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

☐✘✔

 

Week Three

Goal 1: ✔✘✘✔✔✔✘

Goal 2: ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔   

Goal 3:  ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘

Goal 4: ✔✘✘✔✔✘✔

 

Goal1: Similar to the week before, only that I had one day less with snacks. 4/6 good eating days. ~ 66% ~ B

 

Goal2: Walked every day, got in one 25 min yoga session. 7/7 ~ 100% ~ A

 

Goal3: Monday: 1 hours; Tuesday: 1 hours; Wednesday: 1; Thursday: 2 hour, Friday: 2 hours;

Score: 7 hours ~ 47% ~ C

 

Goal4: To-do-list

Got stuff done 4/7 days

 

What I learned:

I started feeling stressed and exhausted this week. In the end I decided to keep doing a little, but couldn't keep on learning for long every day. But I'm glad I did something and didn't lose my continuum.

 

Mood: Can't remember. I guess I felt really frustrated and also afraid. I got the feeling I was studying too long and that the progress was too small.

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

☐✘✔

 

Week Four

Goal 1: ✔✔✔✔✘✘✘

Goal 2: ✔✔✔✔✔✔✔   

Goal 3:  ✘✔✔✔✔✔✘

Goal 4: ✔✘✘✔✔✘✔

 

Goal1: Didn't have a bad water day this week and snacked less - only two days. But I didn't get in my freggies on two days, because of my bad grocery shopping. With the one dessert allowed rule I have 4/6 good eating days.~ 66% ~ B

 

Goal2: Walked every day, got in my yoga session. 7/7 ~ 100% ~ A

 

Goal3: Monday: 6 hours; Tuesday: 0,5 hours; Wednesday: 2; Thursday: 0 hour, Friday: 3 hours;

Score: 11,5 hours ~ 77% ~ A-

 

Goal4: To-do-list

Got stuff done 4/7 days

 

What I learned:

Don't give up, just get your stuff done and try to figure out, what is draining your energy.

 

Mood: Confused.

[Luciana Valerosa Culming]

On 24.3.2017 at 8:11 AM, Luciana Valerosa Culming said:

Progress chart

[...]                            

 

Score:

Goal 1: 62% B

Goal 2: 96% A

Goal 3: 92% A

            ~83%

 

A= 100% - 76%

B= 75% - 51%

C= 50% - 26%

D= 25% - 0%

 Wow that went better, than I thought. I'm really glad about this challenge and I'm going to try sticking to my schedule more. At the end of this challenge I already started going to classes again in week 3. This could have been another reason for me feeling so drained. But I still got stuff done. I didn't get all the stuff done and you can always do more, but I'm still glad about my progress and I'm confident, that I'll be able to stick to the schedule, which is my new motto for May. ^^

 

It helped to set myself a schedule and to incooperate changes slowly.

 

Next challenge I'll try to get in some more workouts and I'll set up some more milestone. My last plan was only until May 15, so I should analyze how much I got done and set myself some new goals for the rest of the semester. Now I finished setting up a new schedule and can determine, how realistic my plays were a month ago.

 

I also want to try preparing meals again. So I have something to eat when I stay at university.

 

See you all back next challenge. And thanks for sticking with me, although I've made myself scarce.

 

Oh, and I get 8 stat points and 1 level up. =)