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miss_marissa

The Unbreakable Miss Marissa

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15 hours ago, miss_marissa said:

I worked a 10 hour day, packed up my laptop to continue working at home to prepare for my 8am meeting with our CEO.

 

Came outside to see bird shit all over my windshield.

Fan-fucking-tastic

 

 

True story:

My dad used to walk out to his car every morning to find avian feces on his driver's side rearview mirror. Every morning, same mirror, same spot. He'd clean it off and it'd be back the next day.

So finally, he cut a leg off of an old pair of jeans and slipped it over the mirror.

The birds would not poop on the jeans.

Every day, he'd take the jeans off the mirror when he left for work and put it back on when he got home. The birds would never poop on the jeans.

ONE DAY, he forgot to to put the jeans back on when he got home from work. Next morning. BIRD POOP.

Moral: birds are jerks.

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5 minutes ago, calanthrophy said:

 

True story:

My dad used to walk out to his car every morning to find avian feces on his driver's side rearview mirror. Every morning, same mirror, same spot. He'd clean it off and it'd be back the next day.

So finally, he cut a leg off of an old pair of jeans and slipped it over the mirror.

The birds would not poop on the jeans.

Every day, he'd take the jeans off the mirror when he left for work and put it back on when he got home. The birds would never poop on the jeans.

ONE DAY, he forgot to to put the jeans back on when he got home from work. Next morning. BIRD POOP.

Moral: birds are jerks.

 

Those birds really think they're ugly, don't they....

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Bird shit story:

 

At a years-past workplace, I was returning from lunch or some other errand (probably 10 years ago, so I don't remember really), and there was only spot left in the lot. THE DREADED TREE SPOT. I'd parked there before, knew to avoid it because last time I parked there my car got caked, but I had no choice. No other places to park. Fine. I pull in. Just as I put my hand on the door handle I start to hear what sounds like rain.

 

Yes

 

yes, I was trapped in my car for 20 minutes because of a literal shit storm.

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24 minutes ago, ixaera said:

Bird shit story:

 

At a years-past workplace, I was returning from lunch or some other errand (probably 10 years ago, so I don't remember really), and there was only spot left in the lot. THE DREADED TREE SPOT. I'd parked there before, knew to avoid it because last time I parked there my car got caked, but I had no choice. No other places to park. Fine. I pull in. Just as I put my hand on the door handle I start to hear what sounds like rain.

 

Yes

 

yes, I was trapped in my car for 20 minutes because of a literal shit storm.

 

That was some premeditated shit.

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23 minutes ago, ixaera said:

Bird shit story:

 

At a years-past workplace, I was returning from lunch or some other errand (probably 10 years ago, so I don't remember really), and there was only spot left in the lot. THE DREADED TREE SPOT. I'd parked there before, knew to avoid it because last time I parked there my car got caked, but I had no choice. No other places to park. Fine. I pull in. Just as I put my hand on the door handle I start to hear what sounds like rain.

 

Yes

 

yes, I was trapped in my car for 20 minutes because of a literal shit storm.

^^ I mean, I'm laughing, but at the same time, my inner germaphobe:

giphy.gif?response_id=591de4a24739c26323

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