• Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

Thura

Thura starts her show

Recommended Posts

Hello everybody,

 

this is my first challenge! I hope I got everything right. If not feel free to give me any hint and advise. A short introduction to myself:

 

I am a 38 years old female living in Germany. For I'm no native speaker, I do apologize for all mistakes in my writing. One goal will always be to improve my english ;) . Well, but back to topic: I have a sedentary office-job like most people.

 

Two or three years ago I startet weightlifting in my small home-gymn, consisting of some dumbbells with changeable weights. Sadly enough I had trouble to stick with it, so there were months without any training.

 

But as of December 2016 I really got into it and am on track ever since. Same applies for my nutrition. A few months ago I startet eating healthy and stick to it since today. So on the excercise and eating front I only have little adjustements. There are other parts in my life where I need to level up very very hard.

 

The main issue in my life is, that I'm feeling fragile. It's mostly a physical problem with a psychological component as well. The thought I constantly think is "Ah no, I can't do that." Or, at least, not without weeks of preparations.

 

I'm constantly in some kind of pain. My knees hurts, my stomach, my back, my legs or I got a headache. Or I'm feeling dizzy. Getting weird vision disorders. Got ticklings in my limbs, hands, feets. Thanks to that I am always "listening" to my body, thinking "oh what's this now? and that? maybe it's something serious this time?"

 

Needless to say I got myself to a lot of doctors. Needless to say they never found anything except issues this my knees and my stomach.

 

Psychological problems involve a history of anxiety, post traumatic stress disorder and depressions. Although I'm quite well at this thanks to my past hard work over two decades and some professional help, I actually suffer from episodes of panic every few months. I also strongly believe that a lot of my physical issues stated above are actually made up by my psyche.

 

I want to change that. I want to level up my life and become anti-fragile. Not just resilent, but even stronger.

 

I plan on achieving this with a combination of doing changes in my life and seek some professional help the same time.

 

My Epic Life-Quest involves:
- Stay under 58kg/127lbs (for my knees)
- Get somewhere about 20% bodyfat
- Evolve to an Assassin, including self defense fighting and bouldering (this wall-climbing-without-rope-thing)
- Learn a lot of cool tricks
- Get an healthy, strong and fit body I can throw in almost every situation to have fun
- Get a well paid job, working around 35 hours a week
- Be calm and self-confident

 

But that's for the future. I have to break it up a little. So I have some goals for this year:

 

Goals 2017:
1.) Get under 58kg/127lbs
2.) Have doctors look up some health issues
3.) Gain more free time
4.) Learn JavaScript and PHP after that
5.) Get MUCH stronger and gain endurance
6.) Get mentally stronger

 

Since I cover some of this goals in my Daily Battle Log, I focus in my challenges on things which require habit changes on a daily basis.

 

So my first Challenge-Goals are:
1.) Stop drinking coffee and soda at my the office
2.) Integrate calf-excercises in my work-out
3.) Start doing a HIT-endurance-routine for 5 mins on two days a week
4.) Start to play World of Warcraft only after 7.30 p.m. on weekdays

 

No. 1 is aiming at goal number 1.) and 6.) . I do track my nutrition so I can get sodas fit into the plan, but hell why? I am currently at 1200 calories a day, so why swap something to eat with empty unsatisfactory calories?

What is more I am sensitive to caffein. Since I have a history of anxiety disorders and insomnia, it's better to cut out caffein completly over time. My stomach will thank me too for letting coffee be.

Of course it is to hard to let both things go. I have a shitty job which bores me, so I drink soda and coffee to cheer me up. That's pretty bad. So I will substitute coffee and soda with black and chai tea. In my next challenges I will clear these out as well, but not now.

One of my epic quests is to change the job-issue, but that will take two or three years. So I have to do my best to stay healthy in the meantime.

 

I think 2.) is quite self-explanatory.

 

3.) I want to improve my endurance and resting pulse rate. My knees are broken, so I cannot run. But directly near my house is a VERY steep path which brings me definitly out of breath. I will go it up and down for about 5 mins two times a week as a HIT-workout. In my next challenges I will expand the time.

 

4.) is part of "Gain more free time" and "learn JavaScript". I do play WoW approx. two hours per day. Compared to my total free time it makes up a huge percentage. In the spoilers I explain why this is troubling me for those who wants to read:

 



I've recently read to quotes which pierced me deeply.

 

One was on my favorite website "Barking up the wrong tree" and roughly says: In their free time, people often don't do what's the most fun, instead they do what's easy.

 

The other one is from Mary Oliver: "The most regretful people on earth are those who felt the call to creative work, who felt their own creative power restive and uprising, and gave to it neither power nor time.”

 

BAMM. That hurted a lot.

 

I always do what's easy on weekends and then wonder why my free time felt so lame and unfilling. And yes, I feel the creative power inside me - but give to it neither power nor time. I haven't sketched in years. I stopped writing or photography. I do not play my guitar anymore. I got a lot of great video-games I want to play, but I won't do it.

 

Because playing World of Warcraft or watching TV is much easier.

 

I want to change that.

 

So my challenges will focus on leveling up my live: Getting me back free time. Create habits that involves fun activities, and not activities that are easy because fun activities are more fullfilling.

 

I did indeed the first step to gain more free time last week: I quitted my WoW raid-group. I was with them since 2009 but with WoW Legion as current expansion it is far too time consuming to keep up with the others. I'm tired of being forced to play more than 2h a day just to farm AP and gear in this neverending content to keep the pace. It was a great sacrifice but it in the same time, it was a relief.

 

So I will only start playing WoW at 7.30 p.m. in the evening, preferable later. Instead I will do some other things. To make matters easier, Elder Scrolls Online is okay as substitute.

 

I apologize for the long post. I hope in my next challenges I can shorten things a bit. I will report back every few days because of my bad english it always takes ages to write these messeges. It's too time-consuming to do it on a daily basis.

 

The show will start tomorrow!

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Never apologize for your English! There are plenty of people in this world (especially native English-speakers) who never bother learning another language, so you're already miles ahead of them. And you're here using it even though it's hard. 

 

I have anxiety as well and I totally feel you on the "I can't do this" thing. But we're all here to help you believe you can. :) 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you two for your support :) !

 

My first day of challenge was a litte awkward. I had to go to work one hour earlier as usual and got home one hour later due to a information-event. So my normal routine was messed up and I did drink a cup of coffee to get me through this long day.

 

Perhaps I have to adjust the challenge a bit: Skipping soda AND coffee is quite hard. I first planned to just skipped soda. But then I suffered a panic episode last week. Anxiety and panic is somewhat linked to caffein-consumption, at least when you're sensitive to it. So I wanted to get rid of caffein asap too.

 

I will instead work with jokers: I got two coffee-jokers a week. When I let them BOTH be my NF Char is rewarded with 5 XP per week. So sorry NF Char - this week's busted already.

 

Quest No. 2 (calf-excercise) went bad too. I've chosen this kind of excercise:

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jTwNTm1EBE

 

Unfortunately I cannot find a place in my flat to hook my feet into. The space under the bed is to high, even with shoes on, and my couch isn't heavy enough (which I indeed fixed with all of my dumbbells thrown on it) and makes suspicious cracking noises. So I will stick to a more conservative method: I will take dumbbells and get up and down on my toes. This should do.

 

Today will be my first day of HIT-training. Go me!

 

I will read through and comment other challenge-threads in the next couple of days. And now I have to go off for work! I really hate it, because our shareholders are visiting us until tomorrow. Nobody likes them, two people already quitted their job because of them and I will be the next. But that's another story for another day ;) .

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh no. I usually ask people if they have a plan for caffeine withdrawal and all that when they're planning to drop coffee and/or soda and I didn't ask you. :( I think you have a great plan though. Being willing to adjust your goals when they're not working out is a good thing!

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
17 hours ago, fleaball said:

Oh no. I usually ask people if they have a plan for caffeine withdrawal and all that when they're planning to drop coffee and/or soda and I didn't ask you. :( I think you have a great plan though. Being willing to adjust your goals when they're not working out is a good thing!

Nevermind :) . Concerning soda I wasn't so deep into it. I usually drink two or three per week, a small bottle (0,3l / 11 oz). Problem is: If I do not pay attention to it or get trouble at work (what is highly likely because of those sh... shareholders) this is escalating fast. It can easely summ up to one or two per day.

 

Since I'm an abstainer and not a moderator it's easier for me to go out of it at all.

 

Yesterday I only drank black tea. I feel that priorities are crucial for me when trying any kind of withdrawal. What HAS to work and what are the alternatives I can offer to myself to stick to the plan? Obviously, those alternatives should be somewhat healthy. It's no use to swap soda with chocolade.

 

Otherwise everything goes nice. I did my HIT-exercise although it wasn't as taxing as it should be. I chose the wrong part of my steep path. Next time will be at saturday, then I will go down the hill a bit further to another point. Perhaps five minutes aren't enough to create high intensity, but I'll stick to it. Extend the time up to 15 mins. three time a week is my plan for the next challenges. Since I am on a calory deficit due to weight loss, I will presumably soon hit my limit in weight lifting so I cannot place challenges here. With 1.200 calories per day I cannot get endlessly strong. Hope this phase is over soon. Only 6kg/13lbs more to go!

 

What's a big deal for me is to embrace the game fully. I love gamification and I love the thought of live as an epic journey full of heroic quests. But I also tend to fall of the waggon, thinking "Today you HAVE to do this... tomorrow that... how awfull". Sure, it's easier to just sit in my chair after work playing videogames or surfing on the internet. But it's waaaay more fun to kick ass, be strong (especially as a woman - I can already open jars with my bare hands! Yay me!) and healthy. So yeah - I have to embrace to be with the rebellion by now.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My challenge is running nice, with only some slight drawbacks. I did my excercise on Wednesday and Friday, but forgot the new calf-routine on Friday. Booo.... habits can be cruel. I will remember it on Monday. Today I did the new HIT-Training for the second time. This time I've chosen a spot waaaay down the hill and voilà - it was much more taxing and I got out of breath pretty good. I'll try doing these on Tuesday morning before going to work, in looong advandced preparation for the summer.

 

Today I also buyed some new stuff: A dumbell-set for my home gym, gloves for weight lifting (I'm getting hard skin inside my hands) and well... I do not know how these thingies are called in English. Two tiny bars, one for each hand, to relieve the wrists a bit while doing push-ups.

 

I also buyed "I will teach you how to be rich" from Ramit Sethi. I'm not in debt in some kind and I never was, but I only started to work two years ago after spending a ridiculous long time at University and being unemployed. Currently I go very well with the money I get but am nonetheless underpaid. One quest of mine revolves in educating me to become a programmer and get a badass job in a badass company, but it can't hurt to get the most out of my current situation. I recently read a thing or two about Elon Musk and got inspired by the "think big"-mindset.

 

But back to topic: My soda- and coffee-abstinence is going fine as well. I am however up to two cups of black tea during work. I will adress that in the next challenges. On the plus side, black tea is much better for my stomach than coffee and has not so much caffein in it. I'm already sleeping better. My goal is to drink only one cup of black tea right after rising and otherwise substitute it with some sort of Chai Tea. But thats stuff for the next challenges.

 

What's not going so well is my weight loss. I'm stuck at roughly 64kg/141lbs the hole f*cking month of April. Of course this is water. There is no way my body can sustain it's weight with 1200 calories per day plus my weight is bouncing up and down by 1lbs from one day to the other. I'm tracking everything, even the milk + sugar in my tea using MFP.

 

Cross your fingers that I see the 62 within the next days.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't know if anybody actually crossed their fingers, but it helped!! Scale says 62.9kg this morning! Huzza!

 

giphy.gif

 

I just ignore the fact that this is actually more a 63 than a 62.

 

Anyway I forgot to report about Quest 4 of my challenge, that being "Start to play World of Warcraft only after 7.30 p.m. on weekdays". That also went well although I got tailwind from some events last week. With new exercises in my plan I need more time and so I got to the computer by 7.15 p.m.

 

I still need to figure out how to buy me more time elsewhere. One part of the problem is my shitty job. I am forced to have an break of one hour, so I have to stay at work from eight to five. All argument with my boss and the shareholders is leading to nothing.

 

Another problem is that I have to do book keeping stuff I never learned plus get a lot of other work thrown at me plus I have to do SEO stuff which I also never learned. In Germany you call someone like me "girl for everything". Technically this means multi-tasking all day without a possibility to escape.

When I get home at six o'clock I feel mentally drained and overall tired, so I am unable to do anything else than cooking, training and play simple video-games like World of Warcraft which don't require a lot of focus and awareness.

 

The only benefit is that I have regular work-times so it's easy for me to establish new habits.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Everything went fine until yesterday. I did my workout on Monday, sticked to my meal-plan... But yesterday was a awful day. It started with my tomorrow-morning-javascript-lesson: I couldn't figure how the Firefox Dev Edition Debugger worked. I then had to go to my office with the feeling of an unaccomplished quest. I felt absolutely defiant and agonized - I wanted so badly to stay home and learn how this piece of software works! (I figured out by now that the software was half broken because of my crappy Linux Skills - but that's another story. Problem solved.)

 

So the pure act of going to work ate up all of my willpower. There awaited me the usual sh...: the greedy shareholders (MUST we pay this employee those 40 bucks for his retirement insurance? Oh of course we paied ourselves several thousand bucks the week before because we're great!), the new co-worker who used to phone me to tell me EVERYTHING she just did (I phoned this custumer, but he didn't pick up... now I phoned this customer, but he must talk to his boss... now I...) tearing me out of my workflow everytime. The other co-worker I share my office with - she's an icequeen, so the window has to stay open half the day and the heating has to be switched off, otherwise she will suffer from headache and nausea. That causes me to be half frozen since half a year.

 

In the end I couldn't resist because of the pure fact of staying there and resist the temptation to just switch off my computer and walk out ate up all of my willpower. I drank to cups of coffee AND a small bottle of fruit juice. On top of that I ate several pieces of chocolate. That won't kill my weight loss but shows me that I have to do something. I will have to stick to this job for the next 2 or 3 years until I'm good enough in programming to go somewhere else.

 

I therefore activate batcave-mode: I act similar to Bruce Wayne. At daytime he does his work like a normal guy, but when night falls he does the real important stuff, like, saving the city. His work grants him the resources to accomplish this task.

 

So I will do the same: My work has to be done to get me the resources I need to accomplish the real important stuff - evolve into an Assassin, become a badass sketcher and author and save the world. I therefore renew my commitment to health: All above everything else I will care for my well being at work. It's more important than doing my actual work.

- I drink at least one and a half bottle of water.

- I do not drink soda or coffee.

- I do not eat junk food.

- I take my supplements.

- I stick to my plan to minimize multi-tasking as good as I can get.

 

Then I will start a quest related to that blithering co-worker: Set boundaries so she will let me work in peace.

Stage 1: Shutting her down as soon as she handed me over the relevant information. She otherwise continues to talk for ever and ever.

Stage 2: When Stage 1 isn't successfull I will directly address the issue and tell her that she mustn't call me for every tittle she just did.

 

This Quest is a master quest, because I am a hardcore introvert who seldom speak up for myself. I am more the lady who smiles and endures everything thrown at her with endless patience. So I award my NF Char:

200 XP when I stick to Stage 1 until the and of the Challenge

500 XP in addition when I accomplish Stage 2

 

I know there's a weakness in there - my XP depends somewhat on someone else. But I know my co-worker for a while now and I am really shure she won't stop gossiping until I tell her so.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 4/29/2017 at 10:17 AM, Thura said:

(I'm getting hard skin inside my hands) and well... I do not know how these thingies are called in English.

Calluses. :)

 

Congrats on hitting 62! You're doing awesome despite the crazy work environment. 

 

Since you have to take an hour break every day, is there something you can do for yourself in that time? Read about the programming stuff or the other book you bought, play around with programming, or just go meditate somewhere or something so you're not quite so exhausted when you go home and/or don't have as much to do when you get home? I know it's easier said than done, but maybe you can hack it somehow. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 2017-05-03 at 1:57 AM, Thura said:

I therefore activate batcave-mode: I act similar to Bruce Wayne. At daytime he does his work like a normal guy, but when night falls he does the real important stuff, like, saving the city. His work grants him the resources to accomplish this task.

 

So I will do the same: My work has to be done to get me the resources I need to accomplish the real important stuff - evolve into an Assassin, become a badass sketcher and author and save the world. I therefore renew my commitment to health: All above everything else I will care for my well being at work. It's more important than doing my actual work.

- I drink at least one and a half bottle of water.

- I do not drink soda or coffee.

- I do not eat junk food.

- I take my supplements.

- I stick to my plan to minimize multi-tasking as good as I can get.

 

Hehe, becoming batman sounds so awesome.

How are you doing in the batcave @Thura?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm doing reeeally fine! Batcave-mode helps a lot.

 

What's so sweet about this mindset is the tremendous amount of mental energy I save every day. Being defiant seems perfectly understandable in my situation, but it sucks a lot of willpower. I have to go to work anyway, because I am currently an apprentice-assassin in training. So sitting there in front of my computer and thinking "You have no idea..." feels pretty awesome.

 

One key are my JavaScript-Lessons at morning before work. They're part of a bigger plan to get me a badass job and I won't tell anyone at work about it. That feels pretty good.

 

I will continue to evolve into an Assassin and only my fellow rebels will know.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 3.5.2017 at 3:31 PM, fleaball said:

Calluses. :)

 

Congrats on hitting 62! You're doing awesome despite the crazy work environment.

Thanks a lot :) !

 

On 3.5.2017 at 3:31 PM, fleaball said:

Since you have to take an hour break every day, is there something you can do for yourself in that time? Read about the programming stuff or the other book you bought, play around with programming, or just go meditate somewhere or something so you're not quite so exhausted when you go home and/or don't have as much to do when you get home? I know it's easier said than done, but maybe you can hack it somehow. 

Dealing with this one hour break is a key-element indeed. Currently I'm sitting there and doing conversation with my co-workers and then clean the containers for my pre-prepared meals so I don't have to do this at home. But I think of another solution... I will tell later on.

 

My challenge is going fine. After having those starting problems the new calf-routine is part of my excercise. I did not drink soda, but coffee. That's okay since I dropped the coffee-part early on. Skipping soda AND coffee was to hard.

 

What's not going well is the HIT-training. I did it a few times, but not twice a week on a regular basis. I will redo this in the next challenge.

 

Speaking of the next challenge: Having now experienced one I have some ideas to improve on the next one. The biggest concern for me is having not enough free leisure time. You see it clearly in me not writing here that much. I really want to but I just have almost no time for NF. That sucks. I sketched it out recently and got the shocking news, that I have roughly one and a half hour of really free leisure time. Time, that is not occupied by work or doing growth-related things like excercise, preparing meals, learning JavaScript, housekeeping stuff and so on.

 

And in that one and a half hour in the evening I am mentally and physically drained. I almost fall asleep in front of my computer. There's no way I can focus enough to do real interesting things like reading "The Better Angels of our Nature" by Steven Pinker or writing an english forum post here. I can't even play Elder Scrolls Online, because it's to hectic. I can only read easy literature or play World of Warcraft, because that's an easy game. At least with my badass Nighthold-Hero-equipped shaman.

 

I work on that, but I have currently no short-term solutions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I will herefor close this challenge. It's a mixed up result. Quest 2 and 4 went fine, quest 3 was quite difficult. I skipped HIT-training a few times. I had to readjust Quest 1 as skipping soda AND coffee was too hard. With just skipping soda I went fine.

 

I consider this challenge a success, but will redo Quest 3 (HIT-training) on my next challenge.

 

For the next challenge I reeeally want to try an improved structure. It still takes me ages to compose a forum post so I think of something nice and simple.

 

Until we meet again!

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.