I like it a lot too.   Thank you -- it's the smallest of things that can wreck my stride (no pun intended).    The meeting with James was excellent, as always, and we have lots of good things coming as well as good things said.  This is the Way.   Today's afternoon win is butternut squash in the slowcooker, just sitting there waiting for me. Gosh it is so good!   Here's a Profile of Butternut squash with a bouns recipe for roasted squash in a kale salad with pomegranate arils, honey-roasted pecans, and an orange vinaigrette.   I'm nearly through a catawhumpus work day, and I'm glad that the new dogsitting client rescheduled for Friday after acupuncture.  I'm about ready to fall asleep on my keyboard. Might take a post-work nap. ❤️ 

hooray for loving, centering connection and for mindset gainz. sending love. ❤️ 

Nice!  I just made the same thing last night to bring into work.  I made a quesadilla with mine with a quesadilla maker someone brought into work.  

Wednesday October 23 "Grendles Mōdor" by Joseph Ratcliffe Skelton   Atropos, Scissoring, and Grumpy Old Men Still remapping how to achieve naps under my meth micro-dosing regimen (that was a joke about Dr. supervised ADHD medication, actual meth looks p bad, just say no). I added a new mental health trackable for napping, using the ✂️ emoji. Lately I've been reading "Fall: or, Dodge in hell", and Stephenson has his self-insert curmudgeon character speculate on naps as a reboot where Atropos the Norn wields her scissors and snips the thread of consciousness, but just for a moment. I'm not supposed to love Stephenson as much as I do, he's an early Gen X white dude who writes about Gen X white dudes saving the world - but. But he captures what it means/meant to be one of those cyber-cowboys in that particular moment of the West Coast tech boom-and-bust, and I find him a warm blanket of remembering every member of that breed that I've learned from over the years. Including my current work dad who just retired as of today (I'm not emotional, you're emotional). I would be honored to be executed by a leftist firing squad someday, and in that better version of tomorrow, my fondness for authors like Stephenson is probs one of my many -isms that earn me my eventual sentence.   Panopticon, Personal Growth, and Stubborn Self-Kindness I have mentors coming out of my ears right now and that's not a complaint. Moral of the story is I have a plan locked-in to promote into a new role by June 2025, partially due to the fact that I've been hoover-ing up job duties like Mrs. Packman on Fleet Week, with all these retiring Gen X colleagues executing their retirement succession planning. ADHD meds, productivity tracking, and some of the core conceits in NF have me running different combos of observation and heightened self-expectations (these fucking challenges), trying to husband along the ineffable process of my own growth as a person (new challenge title: "F-ing the ineffable"!). In one sense, it's working, I'm skinnier and have a job promotion coming, so let's die fucking happy. In another, I'm trying to understand a long term process of self-knowledge and steer between fits of hyperfocus/sub-clinical mania, towards steady mindful growth, and a fucking blip of a few months weight loss or whatever is only a data point, not an end game state.   To this end I play my first intellectual boyfriend card in the attack position (I'm not poly, I swear) - turning James C. Cook face up, he warns that poison-pill of high modernism is the arrogance to assume trackable metrics and force legibility have captured the entirety of what are deeply complex organic processes. This false and forced legibility only re-sculpts the phenomena into a stillborn, or game-ified, version of the life that I hoped to husband into deeper thriving. See also, the ecological catastrophe that are timber farms, as the eventual result of attempts to impose legibility onto tracts of wild forest. See also, past NF versions of Laghail that were stressed out and sleep deprived and enjoying a slow nervous breakdown, but successful in his challenge goals and the skinniest that he's ever been. Cool cool, cool. Cool.   NF Laghail 2.0 is offering passive tracking to externalize my own self-observations, and self knowledge isn't artificial legibility, right? Intellectual boyfriend #2, he certainly isn't suggesting that observing a phenomena isn't the same thing as forcing compliance on a subject, right? After all it's not like we torture or enslave prisoners in the US anymore (awkward answers actually), we just subject them to passive tracking of their every waking moment in cells, on CCTV cameras, in the omni-present warden, in the unknowable whims of parole boards and officers. Surely subjecting the self to simple observation is a neutral thing, right??     All the dramatics above to say I'm still probing the below schema for gentleness and fit before I settle in. I think this is a gentler take on previous challenges. I think. I think the observation points are ones I hope to grow into and I'm not sacrificing important parts of life to grow into them. I think.     Fucking Fall Magic Holy Hill is a basilica in southeastern Wisconsin that gives visitors 410m of elevation to take in the fall leaves spreading around the four surrounding counties that you can view from the high tower. You also have to trek past endless cider stalls and pumpkin patches to reach the basilica. Maybe Sunday?   Borzynskis is a 10 acre corn maze with somekinda complex because every year it's huge and complex in new ways. Maybe Saturday? Samhain drum circle is the high holy day for this circle. Should be a lite dumb supper, a community ofrenda, and a sea of candles and storytelling. I'm bringing shitty folgers coffee and cake donuts, In honor of the Morris women who've passed. 

I just ran into an issue where I went onto the second page of thread (using either the "next" arrow or clicking on the number) loads you to the bottom of the second page rather than the top.  Haven't tested it in a thread with more than 2 pages, but I'd guess it's got the same behavior.

😄 It's funny, I saw the stage play first at a local theatre, and I prefer it, but Tim Curry really does sell his part.   Thanks! I see November coming up, so I think having something simple will be easier to maintain during NaNoWriMo.   🥰 Thank you!   Good afternoon! I had toe cramps last night thanks to not stretching properly. But I seem to be doing okay. Nothing planned for today. I went to my car for quiet during my lunch break, but didn't go back to the park. I would be setting myself up for success if I pack a gym bag for tomorrow.   I've been a little angry about some things these last few days, but I think it's mostly that I'm stressing about my anxiety being persistent (which could be due to temperatures and lighting of my work place, or maybe my blue light glasses which unfortunately are magnifying). I've got angry words to say about the company that's supposed to have picked up my car already (I have fair reason, but an exaggerated response level) and my coworker who is inconsistently helpful (which she doesn't have to be, but it'd settle my mind knowing whether to expect her help or not). Another contributing factor to the anxiety in top of the environmental issues could be just the stress of being in this new job and me not having my stride yet. Fortunately, I know they're all still supporting me through this transition and onward into the other side. But my brain seems to not believe it with other factors stressing it out. The outdoor walk might help. The gym attendance might help. Closing my eyes and breathing doesn't feel effective, but it's a good plan. 😅   Gotta go back to work. Thanks for stopping by. 🫠 Maerad 

Approximately three different times today I have stopped myself from complaining about some aspect of my job either here or in the discord since I feel like I'm turning into that person that complains all the time about something and doesn't do anything about it.   This feels like a pattern. And a problem. And one that I don't want to look closely at, because, reasons.   Boo.

Thank you. Im very excited about colouring them. The plants from the film have such fun colour texture.   yes leaving water out is sensible. I need to remember to make tea more. This wouod help

If it ain’t broke, why fix it? The List is working for me and I think I can do 45 stars again. I’m challenging myself to get more of my one-offs this time, though.   I’m starting the challenge with a weekend out of town for a costumes-encouraged trail race! It’s probably my #3 favourite trail on the Island and Mr. Radost and I will make a whole weekend of it, hit our favourite brewpub and make time for a long walk on the beach. I’m pretty worried about my Problem Foot, I had a return last weekend of the stabbing pain in my heel. Last time, I was okay to run again after a week of calf and IT-band stretches, so I’m hoping it will be fine. The aid station is supposed to be at km 5 and when I’ve had this problem it’s kicked in at around the 4.5km mark, so if I have to bail I should be able to make it there. Ughhhh I just hate not knowing. 8k on fairly challenging ground at the lake was fine at the beginning of the month. Then 4K on an easy chip trail was not. Same shoes, same general activity level (maybe slightly less before the bad run, I skipped my Thursday short run that week). The only difference I can think of is that I had eased off to maybe 30% less calf stretching and skipped the IT band stretches.    This challenge may also see the beginning of Festive Baking Season, right at the end. And Balkan Babes are performing at a local cafe on the 22nd, so I’ll have lots of tunes handy to Buff The Party.    Main goals 🌟 Seek and defeat evil Exercise every week. The expectation is 2/week of run, bike, hike (seek evil), yoga, or strength (defeat evil) 🌟 Regain spells Meditate 10 mins every week 🌟 Lesser Restoration  At least 3 stretching/rolling sessions for my Problem Leg 🌟 Buff the party! Music. The expectation is 2h choir + 1/2h  other practice. 🌟 Protect the party coffers Fun money <$75/week 🌟 Side Quests Home Projects and less-prioritized hobbies (gardening, painting, sewing, decorating, unfucking) 1 hour per week   Bonus 🌟 Action Surge Additional effort on weekly goals 🌟🌟  Patrol the Hinterlands Adventures outside the city or my comfort zone  🌟 Satisfy the Alderman that Evil Has Been Vanquished  Aka POIDH 🌟 Adventurers assemble! I don’t know if there will be more West Marches this challenge, but I can get a star here for successes that don’t otherwise fit my goals (such as the hydration challenge last time)   One offs/Special 🌟🌟🌟 If I complete at least 3 ☄️ tasks 🌟🌟🌟 If I do a Low-Sugar day every week (unsweetened coffee and tea)  🌟🌟 ☄️Tab Clearing (at least 20) (yes, this is still hanging around) 🌟🌟 ☄️Turn over veggie patch 🌟🌟 Festive Baking (Big Festive Event is early this year so I might start baking and freezing in the last week of this challenge) 🌟🌟  If I do strength training every week 🌟🌟 Paint a mini start to finish (repeatable) 🌟🌟☄️ build and stock new upstairs shelves 🌟☄️  Unfuck the doll collection or Konmari/put away CDs 🌟☄️ Order a cushion for the upstairs chair 🌟 (major) Sewing project completion bonus (repeatable) 🌟☄️  Research conspiracies 2h+ period spent on game prep (repeatable)   Points 45 stars: A! Prize will be booking an hour off work one afternoon in December. Bonus: if I make my budgeting challenge, I’ll take $20 out of the bank to put in a Sooper Sekrit Savings Jar for a large fun purchase I’d like to make in the next year or so.    30 stars: B! No prize but the satisfaction of knowing I “passed” my challenge!

Had a better day yesterday but had trouble sticking to my meal plan.   I ate my packed lunch (leftover potato chowder, grapes, and some breakfast sausage links) but then also had a slice of Peach's flatbread pizza.  We got in the habit of sharing over the last couple weeks.  It was definitely not needed.  I donated blood right after lunch and enjoyed a lovely chocolate chip cookie afterwards.  Then since I was more full than usual I forewent my usual healthy snacks but just ended up eating candy instead.  I also wasn't feeling the batch cooked dinner leftovers so I unilaterally decided we were eating a frozen pizza for dinner.   350 calories over target.     DDG and I had planned for an evening walk but I was feeling quite low on energy after the blood donation (or maybe that was an excuse?) but we decided to skip it and spent the evening resting on the couch chatting and watching The Walking Dead.