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Reward Plan  

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  1. 1. Reward Plan

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I need some help on this one. More specifically from the ladies, buy gentlemen feel free to bring it. My fiance is joining me on my wellness journey and I would like to reward her. She is currently in a size 12ish dress. Would it be a good idea for me to buy her a snazzy new dress in a size 8ish and a couple of gift cards to fancy restaurant and have an awesome date night as a reward. Or is this another idea that I think is awesome but will end biting me in the arse




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Skip the dress and get a gift certificate to the store so she can shop for herself...sizes vary so much between stores and brands that even at her goal weight, it still might not fit, and that definitely won't be good for you. ;)

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I'd skip the dress part - even if that is the size she's aiming for (is it?) it still might not fit in the end (or just not flatter her). Too many ways for that to go wrong.

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I think it would be a byproduct of her goals. I'm not trying to push anything on her, I'm just looking for ways to be supportive.

I didn't mean that you were being this big bad meanie pushing that on her, just that if you picked the size arbitrary and that wasn't what she had in mind, potentially that could cause some hurt feelings for her.

I agree with everyone else, the dinner and gift cards are great, but there's too many variables with the dress size.

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Good thought, bad idea. As others have said, there are so many weirdities with women's clothing, that as her body changes shape a style that looks fabulous on her now might look weird later. There are certain dress styles that I cannot wear because of my body type that have nothing to do with my weight or fitness (i.e. they don't fit me now at a size 8 and they didn't fit me when I was a size 3 either!). It's taken me a long time and a lot of frustration to figure that out for myself.

The thought is really sweet though. I like the gift certificate idea so that when she reaches her goal weight she can go buy something that makes her look as fabulous as she feels and show off her new body!

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that leads to total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain." -Frank Herbert, Dune

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Skip the dress and get a gift certificate to the store so she can shop for herself...sizes vary so much between stores and brands that even at her goal weight, it still might not fit, and that definitely won't be good for you. ;)

This exactly. She might be an 8 in some stores, a 6 in others, and a 10 in some others. Nothing worse than a reward dress not fitting.

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I'd say a gift certificate for a store she thinks is fancy/ places she loves but doesn't shop at much when she's hit a goal. Like most of the women are saying bodies can change alot and a nice dress now, might look like crap in a few months.

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I'm a guy, but I'll throw in my $0.02 (ladies, feel free to correct me if needed).

You absolutely will not go wrong with a spa certificate. If she has a favorite clothing store, get to know the managers & clerks (I've found they love helping clueless men surprise their regular customers) and surprise her with a "VIP" shopping trip to jump start her new wardrobe--she gets new clothes (and a romantic gesture), you get to do something special for her that doesn't potentially end up with lots of 'splainin to do.

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I say you gotta know your fiance. Some women aren't into clothes or jewelry or spas. If she really like clothes, get her a certificate to her favorite store or make an appointment at a place like Neiman Marcus, hire a personal shopper and let her pick out something really nice.

If you guys are both committed to a healthier lifestyle, maybe suggest some sort of experience or activity based date, rather than just a fancy restaurant?

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Guest Snake McClain

Although i see why you would WANT to buy her that dress (or a dress) i don't think it's a good idea. just me going to buy a shirt at a store is a pain in the ass. Is the medium too small? The large too big? that's just me. I'm just a dude and no one can shop for me. I'd go the other way. I would NOT buy a gift card to her favorite store (as that seems really impersonal) but as was mentioned maybe a certificate for a SPA TREATMENT! and you can pitch it as, "Baby girrrrl, yous been workin so hard and lookin so so fine, and i know yo azz be stressin, cuz lookin good be hard. So i got you this. Go relax for the day. WORD!" then throw up some *rap hands* and call it a day.

Pro tip: Do NOT talk to your lady (or anyone) the way I illustrated above.

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Guest Gemeaux

Romance her , even if it's at home . Run her a bath , with candles around it . Soft music playing , get some nice lotions and bath salts etc .

Before that you can give her a gift certificate to her favorite clothing store and she can choose an outfit for your date . Some places even have pamper days at home for women and their friends , giving her a girls night in would be nice , and her friends would think you are awesome !

After her bath she gets dressed and you pick her up ( even if you live together ) and treat it as a first date .

Maybe I'm over thinking this .

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Romance her , even if it's at home . Run her a bath , with candles around it . Soft music playing , get some nice lotions and bath salts etc .

Before that you can give her a gift certificate to her favorite clothing store and she can choose an outfit for your date . Some places even have pamper days at home for women and their friends , giving her a girls night in would be nice , and her friends would think you are awesome !

After her bath she gets dressed and you pick her up ( even if you live together ) and treat it as a first date .

Maybe I'm over thinking this .

Haha I must be a terrible woman. I would not be interested in any of this.

But I think it comes down to knowing the person you are in a relationship with, what they like, what they don't like, etc.

"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me lies an invincible summer." - Albert Camus

"Moving on and Moving up" Challenge

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I would definitely not buy the dress. There are a lot of good suggestions in here, but I would not buy her a dress in a size other than what she is now. While I think most people (at least most women) have a "skinny" garment in the back of their closet they want to fit into... buying clothes at a smaller size so they will fit into them just doesn't go down well. Heck, buying clothes for yourself planning to lose weight is a bad idea.

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Guest Gemeaux
Haha I must be a terrible woman. I would not be interested in any of this.

But I think it comes down to knowing the person you are in a relationship with, what they like, what they don't like, etc.

I'm basically just writing what I would want :P

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