I have NO excuse to not become a super villain now...

[Harlequinade]

I'm Harley* and this all started a while ago when I came across this. I'm a sharkie, you see (that is, the affectionate nickname the Black Milk team gives to the people who buy their products) and I was browsing the store (my heart aflutter, my wallet whimpering) when I came across the wet look long sleeve catsuit and thought to myself "welp, I've got no excuse to not become a super villain now." I've got the start to my costume, now I need a volcano lair, some henchmen, and to fill out my application to the Guild of Calamitous Intent.

 

Of course, what's stopping me now is the fact that when I do finally pour myself into that catsuit (okay, less of a pouring and more of a shoving and grunting and "GET THE BABY POWDER"-ing) I definitely will not look like the gorgeous girl that is modelling it!

 

I've always been thin, and tall. When I complain about my belly pooch my friends roll their eyes. I'm a casual runner (mid-distance, 15k road runs are my usual go-to) but running on it's own doesn't make me FIT. I want to go from being skinny to being super villain sexy, and, of course, to feel good while I do it. And knowing myself, this isn't something I'll stick to unless I'm accountable for it (I would have never started running if I hadn't been in a group! And now I've been running for over two years).

 

So here I am, laying myself out for all of you to poke and prod at (and to get a little help in the mean time.)

 

The low-down:

I'm skinny, this we've covered. I've got super skinny, long (gorilla) arms and runner's legs (which I will admit are nice) but I gained some weight this past winter (went from 105 to 125 lbs) that accumulated in my gut that I can't seem to lose (Ninja edit: I also suffer from adult ADD and as I am averse to taking chemical medications, I would love to test if exercise and meditation will help).

 

The pros:

My mom's a fitness junkie- she bribed me into running by paying for my first class and buying me my first pair of shoes. My brother in law is a licensed CanFitPro professional trainer. I live in a gorgeous area, down the road from a gym, a little further down the road from a women's-only fitness centre, and seem to have all of the amenities right at my disposal, but...

 

The cons:

Good god am I lazy. I get up in the morning and lay around for a bit before making coffee to satisfy my hunger. And not even real coffee, keurig coffee. I can't even be bothered to measure out beans and water. And grains? Don't even get me started! Pasta! Pizza! Wraps! Man, a flat piece of bread, throw some shit in there, throw some hot sauce on it, wrap it up, it's good! And BEER. There is NOTHING BETTER than to walk down the steps to the beach with a bottle of beer. The darker the better.

 

The plan:

Something's gotta give here, because clearly the jealousy-inducing metabolism I've had for 24 years is starting to get sick of me.

I'd like to dabbe in paleo- I'm willing to give up grains and find alternatives to my favourite dishes (spaghetti squash! Zucchini lasagna! Nori wraps!) but oh my god, I love beer. 

I'd like to do a bit of strength training to build up my arms (I need more space before I can get sleeve tattoos) and do more yoga, as well as my already established running routine.

 

So, my friends, prod away! Ask questions, make suggestions, demand animal sacrifices, I'm open to anything that can help me get started at this point!

 

 

*name changed to protect the anti-social.

[Spider-Dan]

You suffer from Adult ADD eh? You want our attention 24-7?

Sorry, wish I could claim that one is mine, but it is from a Henry Rollins bit.

Welcome to the show.

[Teros]

woah, that suit is awesome.  I'll join if I can be Henchmen #21.  (although sadly I can impersonate #24's voice).  Well I'm basically the total opposite of you, so I don't think I'll be much help.  I will say that spaghetti squash is amazing.  A month into paleo and I don't miss pasta at all.  I really don't find that an occasional beer will be an issue.  It's more of a life change.  If you're willing to have a couple spaced out and everything else diet-wise is 90% good, then it can slide.  We're all human. 

 

The exercise you do has to be something that you enjoy.  I hate exercising...until I read about shovelglove (which works your arms and a touch of legs/abs).  5 times a week- haven't broken my stride since I started almost a month ago. Also gonna go ghetto and make some dumbell/ffreeweights with water jugs filled with sand.  And a homemade medicine ball (sand basketball) as well.  There's plenty of options and resources here. 

[Spider-Dan]

Well, said. I intentionally broke my diet this weekend as one of my students graduated college, and I went to his party. I overdid it a bit, but I don't feel guilty about it as I got right back on the wagon with my next meal.

[Norgaard]

Good luck on your mission!.

 

it require a great body to pull that suit off!