The problems I face with being a barefooter

[thescrawnycaveman]

For a year, minus the freezing cold slush and snow filled winter, I have been a barefooter. Not only running barefoot, but going out barefoot on a normal day. Though I love it and am in full support of being barefoot, there are a few problems I face:

1. I can't take off my feet when I come home. Its a hassle to wipe debris off your feet to put them on the couch.

2. Everyone seems to be aware. They also seem to think I am not.

3. They always feel obligated to inform me of this fact.

4. You find out exactly what everyone keeps slipping on at the movie theater.

5. Homeless people give me change to buy a pair of shoes.

6. If I had the common sense all of my friends had, I would know that the sidewalks are made of broken glass and AIDS infected needles.

7. Ever feel a snake squish between your toes? Me either, but I'm patient.

8. Once all your friends get used to going to the mall with you barefoot, it becomes even harder to embarrass them.

9. Everyone is suddenly curious how I would react to them dropping a 45lb plate on my foot. I keep forgetting steel bounces off of rubber.

10. The police always offer to take me to homeless shelters when I walk around the block.

Hope you enjoyed, and remember kids, if you don't stick your feet in the food at every restaurant, then you aren't REALLY barefoot.