Assassin-Ranger Maddie, Ready to Rock 'n' Roll

[Madeline]

I'm 24, 5'3", 152 lbs, female, currently living in Nebraska. I've been struggling with my body my entire life.

As a child and then up into my teens, I was skinnyfat, and weak. My friends gave me crap about how thin I was, so I started going back for seconds, and still, no real weight gain (that started an awful habit that got me in my current position, we'll talk more about that later). It was great being thin, sure, but when PE class came around, I was slow (still am). I couldn't do a single pull-up (still can't). Sit-ups were basically the only thing I was good at, and even then, it took me a long time to be able to do sit-ups. I found out later, as I got more educated (go figure, they taught me wrong at school), that the only reason everyone in my class could do them so fast is because they were doing them wrong. I struggled so much because I was actually trying to do them the right way.

Getting into my 20's, I started packing on pounds of fat. I kept my same eating habits as high school, but with much less physical activity. By much less, I mean absolutely none. I went from 125 lbs my senior year of high school at 19 years old to 164 lbs at 23 years old. So, at 23, I joined a roller derby team. While I did get stronger and built up endurance, I wasn't any faster, and I was still flabby as hell. I was still one of the slowest and weakest girls on the team. I quit after about 6 months, because I was moving to a different city.

Anyway, about a month before my 24th birthday, last November, I said this to myself:

"All right, self, new city, new job, new friends... new body."

I started by shaving my head. I had bleached and dyed it all to hell over the last 8 or 9 years, and hadn't seen my natural hair color since then. This of course showed off all the fat in my face, and motivated me even further to try and lose weight.

The first 20 lbs I lost through counting calories, which drove me absolutely bonkers, but it seemed to work. Also, I had gone from a desk job to working at the deli/bakery at Walmart. Lots of heavy boxes, high-stress, hauling ass to get shit done, and then lots of heavy buckets of frosting to carry back and forth. Ended up dropping almost 30 lbs from November to May/June... and then I got lazy. I started eating whatever the hell I wanted again, and I gained back about 15 lbs, which takes me to my current weight of 152.

I tried paleo a few months ago, and I was too lazy and poor to stick to it, not to mention it was hard to have something paleo to eat over my lunch break at work, since I sat out in my car and smoked over my break, and paleo food would NOT keep well in my hot car. Also, I kept trying to fit things into the paleo diet that probably weren't good for me. Some people said dairy was okay, so I drank whole milk and put butter on EVERYTHING (not good if you're looking to lose weight), some people said bacon was okay, so I took that to mean 'COOK ALL THE BACON AND PUT IT ON ALL THE THINGS!' Slowly, all the exceptions I was trying to fudge in turned into giving up entirely.

As of right now, I am over 48 hours without a cigarette, going strong, and the other night I cooked whole chicken in a slow-cooker with some veggies and portioned it out for meals over the next week, along with cooking some frozen chicken breast up for salads and getting that all portioned up so I can actually have something to bring to work and put in the fridge, since I don't have to go out to my car anymore. I eat berries or an avocado over my break instead of a donut. I drink only water, coffee (one or two cups a day), and tea.

Here are my goals:

1) Build muscle, burn fat.

2) Look better naked. (My boyfriend loves the way I look, but he's built like an elf. Tall, thin, with some muscle definition. I'm built like a dwarf. Short and thick.)

3) Be able to do proper pull-ups and chin-ups with ease.

4) Get fast. Gotta outrun those zombies.

And finally, my ultimate dream: parkour. It'll probably take years for me to get up to the strength and skill I want, but every journey starts with a single step, right?

[tsuchinoko92]

Welcome aboard Madeline!

I can relate to being skinny and weak, I used to be such back when I was in high school.

Might I suggest you learn calisthenics and yoga for your parkour dream?

Perhaps, you can quit the smokes and save for a book about pure calisthenics, I would recommend this one: http://www.dragondoor.com/b41/?apid=martensd

Its quite detailed, for a modest 40 bucks.

If you want to lose weight via paleo, read some perspective flip I wrote in the lifestyle hacks in the paleo guild section, it gives you all you need to do.

[Madeline]

Welcome aboard Madeline!

I can relate to being skinny and weak, I used to be such back when I was in high school.

Might I suggest you learn calisthenics and yoga for your parkour dream?

Perhaps, you can quit the smokes and save for a book about pure calisthenics, I would recommend this one: http://www.dragondoor.com/b41/?apid=martensd

Its quite detailed, for a modest 40 bucks.

If you want to lose weight via paleo, read some perspective flip I wrote in the lifestyle hacks in the paleo guild section, it gives you all you need to do.

Thanks! I'm four days now without a cigarette and I feel awesome!

As far as workout goes, I'm starting out with Steve's beginner body weight circuit on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, and then doing interval training on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, and then leaving Sunday as a rest day. My plan is to drop as much fat as I can and get some strength and endurance built up while waiting to see how much extra money I have left over at the end of the month. Reason being, I want to know if I can afford to join the Crossfit gym where I live (they have yoga classes AND their regular Crossfit classes). One of the trainers at the Crossfit gym is a gymnast, and will probably be quite helpful when it comes to helping me jump, tumble, etc.

For now, while I'm getting the basics taken care of, I'm reading up on and studying parkour as much as I can. I like to research stuff before jumping right in. It'll probably take years of hard work and practice to get where I want to be, but nothing comes easy.