Komnenos Posted February 14, 2014 Report Share Posted February 14, 2014 I've been pondering something for the last hour or so. I received a phone call to say that a close relative has died in the last few hours and, to be honest, I'm not really sad. I mean, I am a bit sad. I don't feel like going for a beer for anything like that. But at the same time I just don't feel as sad as I expected to feel when I got this news. This feels like a pretty stupid question to ask, but I'll ask it all the same. Is this normal? It's not something I've ever had to particularly deal with before. Perhaps it's because I'm so far away right now and can't actually affect the situation (I'm in Germany, they're in the UK). I'm just a bit confused. Apologies if this is deemed an unsuitable topic or something similar. Quote Link to comment
Elastigirl Posted February 14, 2014 Report Share Posted February 14, 2014 Grief is just one of those things that affects people differantly,and people have different reactions. Could be your distance. Also sometimes it just takes a while for it to be reality, especially if you are far away. It may hit you harder when you are home and it feels more like that person is actually gone. Quote Wisdom 22.5 Dexterity 13 Charisma 15 Strength 21 Constitution-13 "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind' Luke 10; 27 Link to comment
insanity Posted February 15, 2014 Report Share Posted February 15, 2014 I've been pondering something for the last hour or so. I received a phone call to say that a close relative has died in the last few hours and, to be honest, I'm not really sad. I mean, I am a bit sad. I don't feel like going for a beer for anything like that. But at the same time I just don't feel as sad as I expected to feel when I got this news. This feels like a pretty stupid question to ask, but I'll ask it all the same. Is this normal? It's not something I've ever had to particularly deal with before. Perhaps it's because I'm so far away right now and can't actually affect the situation (I'm in Germany, they're in the UK). I'm just a bit confused. Apologies if this is deemed an unsuitable topic or something similar. Were they older? I know when as all my grandparents passed there was more of a 'It was their time" feel to it, and it was easy to move forward, but when my younger brother passed, it messed me up pretty bad, even though we knew it was coming. Quote "Insanity - you make my world a better place man, you really do! That shit is awesome! :D" - Guzzi- My first challenge My battle Log: Insanity: Warrior Monk Honorary Ranger dubbed by DarK_RaideR, 1000 Pound club (875 of 1000) Link to comment
wildross Posted February 15, 2014 Report Share Posted February 15, 2014 What the others said. My Dad died at 52 and I didn't really grieve at the time, as we were not close. Now that it's been a number of years, I miss him a lot. I'm in the early stage with my Mom, who died a year ago at 82. Other people, it hits right away. Neither my dad or my mom were in my life every day at the time of their death. Quote Warriors don't count reps and sets. They count tons. My psychologist weighs 45 pounds, has an iron soul and sits on the end of a bar Tally Sheet for 2019 Encouragement for older members: Chronologically Blessed Group; Encouragement for newbie lifters: When we were weaker Link to comment
Komnenos Posted February 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2014 Sorry to be so late, but I just wanted to say thanks for the replies. Quote Link to comment
Hong WeiLoh Posted February 18, 2014 Report Share Posted February 18, 2014 I moved through the Stages pretty quickly...but I'm not given to "passive" emotions like sadness -- I got all that out of my system as a teenager (I was the self-destructive "the world hates me boo-hoo" suicidal emo teenager before all that shit became "cool" and "tragically hip" or whatever). Are you a gamer? If you're into Mass Effect, look at Paragon Shepard. No matter what happens, no matter how tragic, you stop and remember, grieve a moment, then get your shit back together and you keep on trucking, keep moving to the next objective, the next step, whatever that may be. If there's someone else depending on you in life, that's who you keep going on for.Granted, you don't have a galaxy to save, but if you want to save your own world, your personal universe, it's not a bad method. My mother died last October, the day after my birthday. She was the last of my blood family. If I hadn't had my gf, our lil family of cats and wolves (2 and 2, plus an Akita dog), I would not have had anyone else to keep going for, and yes, I likely would have imploded.Maybe it's circumstance, maybe it's detachment as a coping mechanism, maybe it's something else. Maybe you're just a tough sonofabitch. Who knows? Only you have that answer. 1 Quote Insert witty & pithy saying here. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.