Kareesh Respawning in 3...2...1...

[Kareesh]

I swear I've made this commitment a hundred times, but here I am again. I'm not really sure why I fall off the wagon. It probably differs each time. Mainly, I think it's because I have so many triggers when it comes to food. I eat when I'm emotional, and being a woman, that tends to happen quite often. I also eat when I'm bored, so when everyone else in the house has gone to bed, and it's just me, I tend to eat just 'cause. And those food choices are, more often than not, junk food. 

 

And, if I'm going to be totally and brutally honest about myself, I'm also pretty lazy as well. That doesn't bode well for exercising. I'd prefer to sit on the couch/computer and game, or watch TV and work on my cross stitching. I tend to do exercising really well for a few days, but then after that, it just seems like too much effort.

 

Honestly, I'm sick of how I treat my body. I'm severely overweight, and it affects how I interact with my almost-3 year old. Stairs are getting harder and harder to climb without getting out of breath, and I've noticed that I become out of breath easier. I don't like it. I want to be able to keep up with my daughter and husband. 

 

And so, I need to respawn and just get to it. I think what has happened in the past is I get overenthusiastic and try to DO ALL THE THINGS! and then get burned out within the first couple of weeks. That's why, in this past challenge, I've been keeping it super simple. Just exercise 3 times a week and watch what I eat. That, however, has even gotten derailed. Now, I do have the good "excuse" of having an aunt pass away thus all the good Southern food was eaten, and of course it happened the same week as Thanksgiving. I tried to be conscious of what I was eating, and even though I did a pretty good job, I still ended up eating a ton of food I probably shouldn't have (boo fast food).

 

I started my respawning by finally joining the gym. I kept putting this off as I'm terrified of exercising in public. Something to do with body image and all that. Now, I just need to do the hard part of actually going. But I'm excited about it and, even though I'm terrified, I'm still looking forward to working towards a healthier me. 

 

[childofscorn]

Aaaahhh I love that gif! XD  

Kudos to you for taking that major step of joining the gym!  Something that helped me when I first started gymming was finding which hours they were least crowded to do, at least until I got my routine down.  It's SO much easier to walk into a crowded gym, put your head down, and do your thing if you know exactly going into it what you're going to be doing that day.  

 

As far as dealing with your aunt dying, and the ensuing deluge of deep-fried unhealthy comfort food from friends, relatives, and neighbors, just do what you can to mitigate the damage, and don't fret too much about the rest.  Emotional eating happens, especially for women like you (and me!!!!!) who already know that it's a trigger.  What you need to focus on is NOT beating yourself up for what you've already done, but work on making good decisions the next time.  Hell, if nothing else, you can always dedicate some of your workouts to your aunt's memory

 

So, take a deep breath.  Pop in your earbuds, pull your hood up, and remember: