Respawn! What... Corrupted save?

[Sympatico]

Hey Guys,

 

It's been a while since I've posted anything on NF. Mainly because I'm not great at that sort of thing. Also because the last couple of months I've had some things happening where I have not prioritised my training.

 

September/October I went on my 6 week European holiday.

December I quit my job and moved out of the house I was in. I wasn't happy with the job (it was having a very negative effect on my mental health) as well as due to the job and the location I wasn't able to separate the work and home life. Also the town was too small for me to pursue other social, educational and lifestyle goals I've wanted to achieve.

January I was staying with my parents working odd hours where I could get them and looking for new work. Eventually at the end of the month a new place to live as well.

February I started my new job and moved. So happy. I was just about to get things back into order and re-assess my long and short term goals when.....

March the company I was working for went into receivership with only 24 hours notice. Start looking for a new job. Again. Working in odd places at odd times when I can once again.

April has found me looking at a new full time job again. Starting next week at the latest....

 

I can't lie. I've enjoyed my little experience over the last couple of months. It was new and I had never been through anything like that before. Except over the last few days I have realised what I have been doing. In short - not a lot. And pizza. So much pizza. The last pizza I ate left me feeling a little sick. I looked further around myself and discovered that a lot of the habits I had built up were now no longer there.

Good diet? Not really. Regular exercise? Hardly. Learning something? Nope.

OK..... turns out I had actually retreated back into solo video games (Yes, even Eve Online doesn't interest me at this point) and tv shows and escaped this reality again. Even my long term, major quest goal didn't spark that "get up and go" attitude.

 

So here I am. Respawn. My profile has been corrupted. Time to start right back at the tutorial missions and rebuild.

 

I'll sign onto the new challenge and start building new habits. Perhaps do barbell work for the first 6 weeks as I know my body is capable of it with the intention of combating the "winter coat" my body has developed. I also need to develop new goals, both long and short that are far more specific then what I've done in the past (I have always worked to "general" long term goals in all aspects of my life. Fear of failing seems to be a thing for me I've decided. I play any game with a quick save and it can take a long time to get though it - needs to be perfect. Need to work on this as well at some point).

This will be my biggest problem though. Finding my motivating force again. Feels like I'm back in high school and being told I need to choose what I'm going to be doing when I leave school. Also my problem with min/maxing as it were - wanting to become an unrealistic super-human is not a goal. Not really. (Unless anyone can point me in the direction of a secret experimental drugs research facility that are working on bio-enhancements? No? Anything similar? Didn't think so  ) I have problems nailing down the points of what that would be on a more realistic level.

 

I shall think more about things and start a new log.

 

 - Sympatico