Working together towards different goals?

[Katamay]

Long story short:

My husband wants to lose weight. I'd like to put some on.

Our work schedules mean we don't have as much time together as we'd like. How can we make workouts something we share if we've both got different goals?

[Guest guest4729]

I feel like that might not be as difficult as you think. Both of you could change your eating habits - healthier, wholesome and good. More protein, less carbs. You should probably be eating a bit more than usual if you'd like to gain a bit but that doesn't mean eat cakes and cookies and things like that. Just consume a bit more than usual but don't over-eat. You could also choose more calorie dense foods while he does the opposite.

As for working out I would suggest both of you doing weights and stuff, but that's really up to what you both like. He could do cardio all day if he wanted but I'm pretty sure that's the exact opposite of appealing for him. With a better diet, more exercise in general and more lifting not only could he lose body fat, but he could also gain muscle in the process. Cut out the crap and eat WELL.

As for you, you could just work to maintain your weight or just gain a bit. You could also start lifting with him to gain muscle strength, get toned, etc. If you happen to gain weight in the process, that's also well and good. Just remember that muscle and fat weigh the same, muscle just takes up less space.

DISCLAIMER: I'm no expert, but this is what I'd probably try to do in your situation. There are people on here who know all this 10 times better than myself.

[ebm1224]

she's right i think. if he wants to lose weight, he needs to lift and do cardio and eat better (likely less processsed stuff, more fruits/veggies/protein). if you want to gain weight, you need to lift (to build muscle), do cardio (to maintain heart health), and eat well (because it's good for you). ultimately, living a healthy lifestyle will get both of you what you want. since he's a guy and likely needs more calories than you, you can maybe just think of it as eating as much as him (if that's not how you already are). serve both of you the same portions and see how that goes.

let us know how it goes!

[jessie75]

You guys can eat the exact same things, and in fact probably in similar amounts just because guys need more fuel to feed the beasts. Plug your numbers in here and see what you come up with. If he wants to lose weight he should eat more than his BMR but less than his expenditure. You want to eat about the same amount or a bit more than your expenditure to gain. like said above, f you are both doing weight training, and he tosses in some cardio on off days, he will lose fat and put on/gain a bit of muscle. Guys are lucky, they have (overall, broad sweeping generalization here, fyi) they tend to lose fat way easier than girls do.

[Pat G]

How can we make workouts something we share if we've both got different goals?

What sort of workouts have you planned to do individually? Will you be doing strength training and him endless cardio?

If you have got the time and the ability, What about some classes down at the local gym, body attack or body pump.

Its good to see a couple getting together to work on your goals, hold each other accountable, and provide support when needed. Booyah!

[solarcoaster]

Gym and workout is always a good option. Focus on diet, an intermediate diet which fulfils the demand on him losing weight and you gaining as well. Most importantly make sure to work this out as a team because there is nothing more important that team work and compromise in a relation, sometimes not even your goals.