A question I ask myself that makes me freak out and clean everything

[lexicon]

What if you went to sleep tonight and woke up tomorrow on the first day of 7th grade?

 

My friend saw this in a Tumblr post and asked me a few months ago, and after percolating for a few weeks I ended up freaking out and thinking I was wasting my life and spent an entire weekend cleaning my room (which REALLY NEEDED TO HAPPEN) and trying to orgainze myself but I haven't been really motivated to do much more than that.  I was thinking about it again today and after really just cleaning my room again I don't know what else to do. 

 

Anyway, I would probably do these:

1. Dress better
2. Have better taste in music
3. Eat better and possibly not have to go through my entire adolescence as a blubber nugget
4. Keep up with practicing and learning guitar, don't just expect to be instantly good at it
5. Chill out a little about gym class volleyball, actually stop embarrassing myself in gym class in general
6. Get an after-school job
7. Keep up better with schoolwork
8. Go to college to be a dietician, or something where I can do scientific studies about health, instead of marketing like I did
9. Talk to more people and make myself more available to hang out

Obviously most of these are impossible because I'm not going to wake up on the first day of 7th grade out of nowhere, but I CAN do things like continue to eat well and exercise, re-learn guitar... I just graduated college a year and a half ago, so I'm not sure if another degree is in my near future.  There are ways I can change my career without getting it, I'm going to have to try them out.

 

So far all I have is a clean room and a list of things I want to learn.  I just kind of wanted to share where my head is at right now, maybe share this question and see if anyone will be hit by the same sort of crisis that I was.

 

(when I asked my brother, who is in 10th grade, the question, he just shuddered and said he'd be constantly, overwhelmingly annoyed with everything)

[JPrev]

I was in that boat coming out of college.  Eventually I realized that motivation was never going to be enough to make me better at the stuff I valued.  After a long day at work and dealing with increasing responsibilities in general, spending what little free time I had doing anything other than straight chilling wasn't appealing.  But the only way for me to get my next degree was to study, to get better at guitar to practice, to become fit to workout.  It wasn't about what I felt like at the moment; it was about figuring out what was worth my time and discipline to have in the future.  And that was that.  I picked a couple things at a time and rather than rely on motivation, I became disciplined.  Years later things are pretty cool!

[Raincloak]

If I woke up and had to face 7th grade again, I'd be a pretty unhappy camper, because 7th grade was shit and I consider not having to ever do it again a major perk of adulthood.  I learned a great deal in 7th grade, such as all about political correctness, institutional racism, teachers who love their jobs and are admired by their students, and teachers who hate their jobs and are derided and loathed by their students.  I haven't forgotten those teachers, but when they were old and dying, take a guess which one I visited.

 

Oh, and I guess the Spanish and algebra didn't hurt either, 7th grade formed the base of several academic skills I still use today.  But yeah, I'm not sorry for anything I did, and only slightly sorry for not doing things I didn't do, such as sneak out one night and set that damn school on fire.  If I had to do it over again I'd be more confident, less respectful, and even less popular than before.

 

Nowadays, though, I'm certainly catching up on skills I didn't study enough in my youth, such as music and computer programming.  It wasn't like I really missed great opportunities, but I still enjoy learning.  Will beginning cello lessons at age 30 ever make me a virtuoso?  Fuck no.  But if I decide I like the sound of cellos and want to learn to play, then I shall.   The nice thing about being a grown-up and not in 7th grade is: I get to do ANYTHING I WANT.  And nobody can stop me.

 

As JPrev points out, discipline can take the place of many things -- not just motivation, but also talent.  I'll never play in the symphony, but with a few years of practice, only the symphony players will know the difference.  Everyone else will just think I make nice music.

[RMDC]

I really like your list, lexicon - it looks a lot like my own, in spirit if not in specifics.

 

Seventh grade was probably the worst year of my life, school-wise. There wasn't much I could have done to make my life any less of a hellhole from 7 AM to 4 PM. As for the five or so hours I had outside of school, I think I'd like to have taken the opportunity to get into healthier habits. Not just eating better and getting exercise more routinely - I spoiled myself with my insane metabolism, thinking I would always be rail-thin - but also in terms of my relationships with other people, my self-talk, and how I moved in the world. I used to wish I could go back in time and punch young me in the face. On reflection, it might be better to go back, talk about how my decisions as a twelve-year-old would affect me in my thirties, and gently explain why it was necessary to punch myself in the face before cocking a fist back.

 

Believe it or not, I started smoking at age 13 and didn't quit until I was nearly 24. That was probably the hardest thing I've ever done. So I guess I've already got a major goal checked off the "Fix My Mistakes From Grade 7" list. I can be proud of that, right? If I've got that behind me, I can handle whatever's next on the list.