300+lb Anime Nerd

[winterbreezy]

Hello there! My name is Jessie (though most people call me Jessica XD), and I'm from Detroit, MI (scary >). I'm 23-years-old and I weigh about 322lbs. Not a weight to be proud of at all. But a few years ago (2009) I ended up weighing close to 400lbs (371lbs). What scared me into trying to lose weight was when I had a severe anxiety attack (not sure what triggered it, might have been the smell of greasy food I was cooking for my mom). I went to the ER and they did an EKG and took x-rays, but everything looked fine. I went to the doctors the next day for a follow-up appointment and found out that high weight, 371lbs. I felt like ultimate crap when I found that out I weighed so much. I also got an MRI done to make sure no blood clots were in my lungs (none were), and I was diagnosed with general anxiety.

I don't think I really did a whole lot to lose weight, but after getting a job at a warehouse in 2010 I ended up getting down to about 330! And for the past couple of years I've been up and down with my weight, my highest last year was 350 and I felt embarrassed going to an anime convention weighing so much and hoping to be under 300. What ruined my streak last year was when the dog I raised since he was a puppy passed away at 5 years old from choking. I was losing weight for myself and for him so I could be more active and play with him. After his death I just didn't care about anything anymore. For the past 3 years I've dealt with family members passing away and that's led me to not caring about myself and gaining weight. But now I'm ready to make a change, and ready to stick to doing something for myself!

I love anime, manga, and some sci-fi stuff (Doctor Who ). And cosplaying has been the one thing I love wanting to do when I go to an anime convention! But to me it's embarrassing trying to pull off your favorite (skinny) character and look like that character ate some of the other characters from that show. I shouldn't care what others say or think about me, but sometimes it gets the better of me and I start to assume things (which greatly annoys me when my mom told me about the "assume" thing ). So my self-confidence and self-esteem is definitely in the negatives, or just non-existent. I don't really remember the last time I genuinely smiled about anything. Basically on a day-to-day basis, my face looks like this -> , but I want to be like this ->

At 322lbs, I'm HOPING to be under 300lbs this year, especially before my 24th birthday (December 23rd)! All of my life I've been overweight and have never been skinny at all. So I'm hoping to make a change and once I found out about this website I decided to check it out. All I can say is that this is amazing!

Currently (after seeing the doctor on 8/17 and my weight being 329) I'm (trying) to do a daily walk in the park across the street from my house (modified my route because a certain house has 3 dogs and I nearly got attacked by them >_>), as well as doing the body weight workout along with a SparkPeople 28DBC cardio blast, and doing interval training on the other days. I'm trying to keep my diet as healthy as I possibly can, and since we're tight on money we're getting our groceries from Aldi's. I think once I've moved out of my parents house and get my own place is when I'll try the Paleo diet, but for now I'm just trying to cut a good chunk of junk out and eat more wholesome foods. I eat badly only once a week (maybe have chips or red hots or something I really wanted, even my cappuccino on Sunday morning), but I'm working on trying to get everything balanced. And I tried having coffee only, it sucks XD So I'll probably try having tea with stevia in it or something.

Thanks for checking out my intro, I hope you didn't get bored ^^; Wish me luck on my quest!

-Jess

[Phoenix]

Welcome Winterbreezy!

50lbs lost is nothing to look down upon although you say that you didn't do a lot.

Perhaps working in the warehouse required a lot physical exertion?

There are some really good transformations about people who lost a lotta weight on the main page.

Also you might want to check this thread out:

http://www.nerdfitness.com/community/showthread.php?13399-No-Idea-What-I-m-Doing-But-I-Like-This!

[emptyknight]

Welcome! I just joined a couple of days ago so I don't have a lot of advice, but I know what it's like to have a lot of weight you want to lose. From all the threads I've read this seems like a very supportive community, so I think we're in the right place!

[katpower]

Hi! Welcome etc! Sounds like you're on the right track

[BeigeTurtle]

Hi Jess! I just wanted to chime in and say best of luck to you! Definitely look through not just the blog posts, but also the threads here - there are some great, inspiring transformation stories. And if you have questions, I've found the NF community to be both supportive and knowledgeable. Welcome!

[67alecto]

I'll throw out there that it sounds like you're going for a lot of activity. While this is a good thing, the biggest dent you can make when you are that heavy is to reduce your intake. Counting calories isn't sexy, but when you have a lot of weight to lose it really does work. It also will help you undo some of those unhealthy habits you developed over the years. By seeing how many calories are in an actual serving size vs what you need to fuel your body, you will be able to carry this forward. Where you are, some basic strength training and walking will be enough to get you on the right track. Resistance bands are a fantastic and inexpensive way to get a workout in wherever you happen to be.

Welcome and good luck!

[SnTFitness]

I am a newbie as well, good luck in your quest/adventures. I will echo what has been said before - you are making GREAT progress, keep with it. I worked with a client (personal training) that was over 500#, I asked him to switch to diet soda -- that was about 3000 calories a day that we removed from his diet. So the seemingly small things may actually be huge. Any activity and dietary changes will add up -- some a lot more than others.

[winterbreezy]

Thanks everyone! I'm working as hard as I can for myself and after yesterday I was totally in BEAST mode! I did two sets of the body weight workout and my muscles were on FIRE!!!! But after everything I did I felt GREAT! I even improved on my planking! I never thought I'd hold it for 10 seconds! Last week I could barely hold it for 3-5 seconds! So I'm hoping to improve more and more each week with exercise, and stay on track with eating healthy. I'm hoping to show of some pictures when I get a chance too

I have a weight change picture of how I looked at 371 (possibly) and what I looked like at 326, though I should update the pictures with newer ones XD

http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c217/wraths_hell/weightchange.png

I took pictures of what I looked like this past Saturday, but I'll take more pictures next month on the first and put them together to compare them

[Laney]

Keep going! Maybe I'll see you at a Midwest con in a sexy cosplay some day

[Jazzybell]

Hey, Winterbreezy! Looks like you've done great so far and have been steadily losing weight! You mentioned in your post that you had been losing weight so you could be more active with your dog. I'm sorry he passed away He wouldn't want you to give up, though! So what are your goals now? What inspires you to keep at it after the fitness honeymoon phase (ha...) wears off?

I completely understand how living with your family can make eating healthfully difficult, especially when you're not in charge of groceries. Have you talked to them about your weight loss goals? I don't live with my parents anymore, but I do live within walking distance and we share meals together several times a week now because my mom decided to start preparing Paleo dinners. Once I showed her my research and examples of how it could be healthy, easy, and affordable, she made the decision, as sole grocery shopper, to change our family's eating habits. My dad and youngest brother are reaping the benefits of the delicious, simple food set before them each night, and my mom and I have bonding moments over sharing recipes and trying them out together

If you can find a supportive environment within your own household, your goals will manifest easier. But still, know that you can hop onto NF anytime and your fellow rebels will have your back!

[winterbreezy]

Thanks Jazzybell (I like your name XD)! My goals for this month (thanks to a Youtuber to help motivate me make them) are to lose 8-10lbs, sit less and stand more, and read for 30-60 minutes a day (not fitness related, but it's fine, lol). Looking at myself in the mirror and watching the Youtuber I subscribed to inspire me to try and keep at it. I will have my times where I'll mess up and feel like crap, but I just have to work harder and do better the next day! Can't beat myself up for one day and continue to screw up because I feel bad.

We're all trying to lose weight here, but I think my parents willpower isn't very strong to keep away from the bad things (ex: my mom bought these candy bars in July to sell at a family reunion, but she forgot so she put them all in the freezer. We just discovered yesterday that 9 Butterfingers were missing. And there's only one thief here that would do that: my dad). And my dad told me a few nights ago that he's been eating healthy but nothing has changed so he's just gonna get gastric bypass or something. I don't want him to do that, and I would never resort to that, because I know I can do it on my own! As for my mom, she's got horrible arthritis in her right knee so she's kinda limited to what she can do (we know she can do aquatic stuff, but I don't think we have any clubs/community places with pools nearby :/). So she's taking supplements and crap, so I guess I'll see what happens with that. But we do try and eat good for the week, but only eat "bad" on the day we weigh in. (Like the Friday before I made turkey burger macaroni, but it didn't agree with my stomach, so I was sick for a few days.) I definitely want to try and go Paleo whenever I can move out of my parents place. And also I have to get over my hard craving for cheese XD But my parents definitely support me for trying to lose weight.

But if I ever do get to the point where I feel like giving up, I will definitely re-read articles on this site to get my motivation back and keep pushing forward!