c:\dylan\>introduce.slf -NerdFitness

[ignoredthoughts]

The humor that can't be seen from the title is that I'm writing this from a custom (debian)linux netbook. Hi! My name is Dylan.  I'm a 30 year old, married, soon-to-be father.  Professionally I troubleshoot/remedy hardware/software issues on a wide variety of high production printing equipment, computers, and various network utilities for a large company who's main focus has nothing at all to do with printing, graphics, or computer hardware for that matter.  Personally i'm a movie, computer, literary (mystery,thriller,sci-fi,fantasy), video game, take things apart and put them back together without regard to the extra screws at the end that weren't there when I started, music (anything but country(I'm SORRY country fans! Big 'n Rich is oooookay)),cooking, eating, and anything else that piques my interest enthusiast (which really is probably too much). Spiritually i'm comfortable with my beliefs which are in my family, my friends, and things that I can understand, touch, smell, see, and hear.  Physically i'm somewhat of a wreck heading in the wrong direction.

 

Let me take two steps back, then three forward.  Since early on I've suffered from ADHD.  These symptoms include starting a billion things and never finishing them, never being able to focus for extended periods of time, holding interest in much for more than weeks at a time or days at best, and a slew of other things that at the moment escape me and probably bore you.

 

One step forward.  I've tried more than one diet that seems to never have stuck.  High protein/low carb, vegetarian, vegan, fasting, supplements, voodoo and dark magic.  It was about a year ago that I came upon the Nerd Fitness web site and it's pro-paleo mentality that I've kind of found my niche.  For the most part I've been good about eating healthy and modified-paleo at least a good chunk of the week though not every meal.  It's difficult to diet without forcing your significant other to follow you when your responsibilities are making dinner a couple nights out of the week.  I say modified paleo because I can't disregard the science behind greek yogurt and AAAArrrghhhh I just love cheese so much!!!!

 

One more step toward the present.  It was the tail end of 2011 and all was relatively okay physically.  I weighed 174 lbs and had come down from weighing 235 lbs just earlier that year.  I was extremely active in the gym and outdoors.  It was when I had just started dating my future wife and baby's mama.  I was no stranger to long bike rides, taking a crack at the punching bags like I was playing Punch Out IRL, basketball, pretending I was a hamster in a ball on a treadmill at the gym, pumpin some weights, extending my lifespan a bit in any way I thought possibly entertaining.  Life happens though and like so many things in mine, I eventually lost interest and forgot about it.  Even worse, near the end of this story, I fell into the habit of easy comforts and unhealthy reasoning.  The first trimester for my wife and I though were recklessly fast food involved.

 

The last step and we're here at Now, not then, or after, just now as i'm typing this.  Living with ADHD without trying to find help for it was a choice that in my early 20's I thought was the right one.  I had quit taking medication that I was on all throughout middle and high school because I was right, they were wrong, and that was that.  I've come to the conclusion that yesterday's me may have been fine with that but today's me wasn't.  Without going into details I'm practically the poster child for aggressive adult ADHD and it's wrecked havoc on my life.  Already i'm off track to why i'm really here, which is the physical aspect of my life.

 

I weighed in at 244.4 lbs on August 27th, 2013 (the most i've weighed my entire life).  This may be less than what I weighed previous to stepping on that scale because throughout this year, off and on, i've gone through cycles of being stressed to a breaking point which have culminated to two panic attacks that are causing me to recognize that I need help on a few of my life's fronts.  None of this has to do with my wife or soon to be child.  Work has simply been difficult for me lately and honestly it may be mostly if not all me.  My reasoning for this is, what I do is better than flipping burgers, looking for work, or going back to masonry or apartment complex maintenance or graphic design or hell it doesn't matter because I have a job and it's paying my bills and the health insurance is great and I have a child on the way and I can't afford to look this beast in the eye, give it the finger, and slay it just yet.  However that doesn't change what's happened and I've found counsel in a therapist and refuge in medication for ADHD.  I know that some may snort at this as a cheap answer but for the first time since I can remember, there aren't a billion voices (lately negative and overlapping, mostly non-sentence finishing) ranting in my head and I, for the first time that I can think of, have had a few moments of mental clarity and peace.  Again, my problems are personal and not external, i'm just not the person I want to be for my child and don't have the legacy I want to leave behind, one i'm not trying to leave behind any time soon, hence why i'm here.

 

To wrap up.  This is a moment of embarrassing humility.  When I first came upon Nerd Fitness I read about Saint, the Dragon Slayer.  He had posted pictures of himself before and after.  That took a type of guts that I want.  Saint, you're a hero.  In advance, i'm sorry if anyone is offended that I posted this, please respond and i'll edit or whatever you suggest.  I'm posting a picture of me now in hopes that this holds me accountable to make a permanent lifestyle change for the best.

 

 

When I found out that I was going to be a father I had a physical.  Two weeks later the doctor told me that I had a choice.  I could make a change to the way I lived or I could simply start taking insulin.  What sucks is I don't even drink soda or eat candy that's just the way it is.  To make matters worse, I've been having chest pains when I wake up, some that were severe enough to send me to urgent care.  I didn't always look like this and i'm not sure why it happened but i'm not dead yet and don't want to be.  I'm working towards a better, longer life that involves making better nutritional choices, being physically healthy, capable of out pacing a zombie apocalypse, and going toe to toe with my own dragon.

 

If you've read this far thanks for letting me get it off my chest.  I'd appreciate any suggestions about training routines for reducing body fat or anything else for that matter.  I'm a big fan of cooking and eating so if you have any great paleo meal suggestions that'd be a huge bonus!

 

-Sincerely,

c:\dylan\>wave.bye

[alienjenn]

welcome to the rebellion

 

grats on the upcoming baby

 

I can say with confidence that losing weight/exercise can totally control the sugar issues... before losing weight my a1c was >14 (really really bad.. you get a diabetes diagnosis at >6)... I have gotten it down to ~5.5 which means no drugs no nothing

 

you can do this man!