Taking things too seriously

[batterycp]

Does anyone ever feel like they take everything too seriously? I'm totally into improving myself on every level and am driven to read and apply at all times. I believe my Yin/Yang is no longer balanced and I think it leads me to feel burnt out sometimes.

 

How have you dealt with this?

 

For me, I think I'm going to go take a nap and then take a nice walk in the sun.

[redwoodfog]

I think I do this. I forget to breathe, and smile and laugh. I would like to live life with a lot more openness and curiosity. Meditation has helped some, though I've been neglecting the practice lately.  At times I feel so focused on improvement (a future self) that I'm sacrificing the present moment. I don't have much advice, except that grounding, relaxing activities (such as naps and walks!) are pretty helpful to me.

[batterycp]

I'm trying to remind myself (Just came across it again) that health is not a goal in and of itself but rather a leap pad. It allows me to accomplish so many other things in life so it is incredibly important to remember the reasons WHY I am trying to improve my health.

 

For me, being able to share experiences with those I love and not be bothered by pain, sickness or allergies is important. Also, although I don't have kids yet, I want to take care of myself so I can be there for them and my eventual grand kids.

 

What is your WHY?

[tomocalypse]

I know what you mean, not only do I tend to go at things a bit too hard and get burnt out, but I find I stick to goals so seriously in my head that I end up mentally beating myself up a lot for every slip up.

It's hard sometimes to just chill and let the odd little slips go, even if I know I'm still on track overall.

 

I'm trying to remind myself (Just came across it again) that health is not a goal in and of itself but rather a leap pad. It allows me to accomplish so many other things in life so it is incredibly important to remember the reasons WHY I am trying to improve my health.

 

For me, being able to share experiences with those I love and not be bothered by pain, sickness or allergies is important. Also, although I don't have kids yet, I want to take care of myself so I can be there for them and my eventual grand kids.

 

What is your WHY?

^These are great reasons btw.

 

My why is pretty similar. I want to be as indestructible as possible, for myself and current/future family.

 

And I hate the idea of being restricted in my own body. I want to be able to do all the things I imagine myself doing, running, jumping, lifting, climbing, and never feel like I'm missing out because of poor fitness.

[MariahSnow]

Oh man, I'm glad I found this thread. I get really overwhelmed from all the things and there's a giant list of things I "should do" and a list of stuff I "want to do". Sometimes I end up taking too much off that "should do" list and not enough from the "want to do" list. It's kind of like forcing yourself to be a morning person when you're a night owl instead of working with your strengths as a night owl (like being productive after everyone else is asleep).

 

There are 100 reasons "why", but none of those really add up to anything for me (yes, not even being healthy for my kids). What does it for me is the good feeling I get after (endorphins) and the ability to fall asleep at night easily instead of tossing and turning in misery.

[batterycp]

MariahSnow, how do you determine whether to take from the "should" or "want" lists? I have the problem of taking on too many items at once and with too many coming from the "serious" list and not enough from the "fun" list. I've started keeping a excel file of all the items that I'm currently/planning on working on. This has helped. Just being able to have an overview picture, an "Overworld Map" if you will, really gives me that perspective.

[MariahSnow]

MariahSnow, how do you determine whether to take from the "should" or "want" lists? I have the problem of taking on too many items at once and with too many coming from the "serious" list and not enough from the "fun" list. I've started keeping a excel file of all the items that I'm currently/planning on working on. This has helped. Just being able to have an overview picture, an "Overworld Map" if you will, really gives me that perspective.

 

I guess it's actually more complicated then I thought. Didn't realize that until I started to write it down. So almost everything other than sitting on the sofa and reading The Walking Dead has some need for motivation. I typically try to weigh in the after-effects of a specific task, like, will I regret skipping this later? Will I enjoy this as soon as I get one foot out the door? That separates the shoulds from the wants. Sometimes I just want to go for a run after work because it fels good, I get outside, I move a lot more than I have for the previous 8 hours, etc. Typically if I start doing any kind of avoidance behavior, dragging my feet, throwing a tantrum like a 2 year old, "no I will not pack my gym bag for the morning!!" then I try to evaluate what's really going on.

 

Recently, I've been kind of bucking the trend because everyone says I should weight lift. There's a giant movement right now to get women away from cardio and into weight lifting. But what if I just really like cardio? I know all the benefits of weight lifting, and I do enjoy the workouts, but why is everyone telling me what to do? What about what I actually enjoy? There's probably several lists out there like: what everyone thinks I should do, what everyone wants me to do, what I think I should do, what I want to do, etc. I just try to cut down to the core and think about what I want. It's incredibly selfish but that's actually incredibly good. I find a lot of the items on my "should" list were not put there by me. Or they were put there when I read one article about glutes by Bret Contreras, or one article on the paleo diet, or one article on waking up early and being productive. Pick a big goal (mine right now actually is training for an olympic distance triathlon) and all the rest of your mini-goals (like pushups, and glute strength) can assist that main goal.

[Machete]

Life is too important to be taken seriously. (Oscar Wilde)

[batterycp]

Machete, I enjoy that quote. Thanks for sharing! I'm finding that trying not to multi-task and really just enjoying whatever I am doing at the time, even something like the dishes or mowing the grass, have been providing a more fun and playful feeling throughout the day. work hard, play hard. 

 

In addition, I always try to "be water" and take on the form of what the situation calls for. 

 

“Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. 

Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.† - Bruce Lee