Honest_Fia Posted June 6, 2014 Report Share Posted June 6, 2014 Hello everyone! Since these forums are supposed to remain anonymous, I'm going by an alias I already have from somewhere else. You can call me Fia (that's Fee-ah), and I'm 23 years old. I guess I'm supposed to share my story and battle plan and explain what I plan on contributing to the community, so here goes: ...actually this is kind of difficult. The story starts with this: I was abused. A lot. I grew up in a culture where it was okay for my older relatives (and there are a lot of them) to treat me like crap, comment on my body, and talk to me like crap because I'm 1. A girl and 2. younger than they are. It's not really okay yet, but I'm getting there. I was also isolated for the same reason. I'm a girl. My place is at home. That's what they think, anyway. It means I'm still learning how to interact, make friends, and be a normal person in mainstream American society. The reason I mention the emotional and physical abuse they put me through is because it made me socially awkward and deeply depressed. I turned to eating, and I'd spend most of my downtime sleeping and watching TV. I turned from a petite, 95 lb girl into a 150 lb girl over the course of four years, and I was bullied a lot. My weight has fluctuated a lot since my senior year of high school. When I was 20, I got back down to 110. After landing myself in a psych ward last year and being forced to move back in with my parents, I've gone back up to 134. Sometime in the last year since the psych ward, something clicked. Right now what I tell my few close friends is that it feels like I'm waking up like a really, really long time. I don't know how to describe it beyond that. In the past few months I've started trying to get fit, and I've struggled with periods of giving up and picking myself back up again. I've made a lot of mistakes, too. Results are kind of slow, but the main problem right now is a lack of consistency in both diet and exercise. It's hard to not look in the mirror and think "F--k it, things will never change". Logically though, they have to. Life doesn't stay still, and knowing that on a deeper more logical level is what enables me to eventually keep picking myself up. I'm looking forward to the six week challenge that starts on Sunday, and I'm looking forward to actually having a community of support this time around. I bet it will help a lot. Enough about that, though. Here's my battle plan! 1. Clean up my diet! I was reading the articles on paleo, and it sounds awesome. I wouldn't actually be giving up much that I'd miss, anyway. 2. Try to do the beginner bodyweight circuit 3x a week, yoga 1x a week, throw in some jump rope (it's a loose structure. I just enjoy jumping rope. Advice and guidance are welcome and appreciated).3. Continue therapy. Work on taking medication for depression EVERY DAY and stop forgetting doses! It took me four years to find a pill that works and I shouldn't be skipping doses! 4. Work on becoming an independent adult. The economy is tough right now but I want to move out of my parents' house. I can do it! As for what I'm offering to my fellow rebels, here's the deal: I got some stuff under my belt concerning depression, anxiety, PTSD, body image issues, intrusive thoughts, suicidal tendencies, and borderline personality disorder. Anybody who wants to talk, anybody who feels like they can't make it through another day, you can message me any time. I welcome you with an open heart because I don't want you to be hurting. I want to return the support that I am sure to find here. I want to give back, so don't hesitate, please. Best wishes to everyone! - Fia 1 Quote Follow my first challenge here: http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/49399-honest-fias-first-challenge/ Link to comment
amydoesthings Posted June 6, 2014 Report Share Posted June 6, 2014 Hi Fia! I'm another new girl. Best of luck - you have some great goals! Hopefully the exercise will be a great complement to the therapy. Looking forward to reading more from you. P.S. Medication reminder! (Helpful? Unhelpful? Unhelpful) 1 Quote Level 0 Pixie. My QuestSTR 0|DEX 2|STA 0|CON 1|WIS 7|CHA 5(I'm not actually wise or charismatic - I just don't deserve any strength points yet) Link to comment
Gamaryn Posted June 6, 2014 Report Share Posted June 6, 2014 You've had quite the journey, And I can tell you now you're not alone anymore. We're all here for you I can relate to much of what your journey up to this point has been, I've been to a psyche ward as well and I know how that can be. Especially with the feeling you said of having "woken up". I've been at that point for awhile, And it's definitely good that you've reached that point. It allows you to build up your life again to where you want to be. I'll be rooting for you! And if you want to talk or anything just shoot me a message . Good luck! Quote Adventurer, Level: 1.STR 2 | DEX 1 | STA 2 | CON 1 | WIS 2 | CHA 2 "Happiness can be found, Even in the darkest of times, If only one remembers to turn on the light." - Dumbledore. “That there’s some good in this world, Mr. Frodo… and it’s worth fighting for." - Sam. “Even the smallest person can change the course of the future.†- Galadriel. Link to comment
juudar Posted June 6, 2014 Report Share Posted June 6, 2014 It's so good to have you with us, Fia. I look forward to seeing you around the forums. Quote Happy, Healthy, Strong!130 lbs 12%12% SW: 208CW: 198GW: 130Current challenge:http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/49868-juudar-slays-chickens/ Link to comment
Mugen Posted June 6, 2014 Report Share Posted June 6, 2014 Hi Fia! First of all I have to say I admire the fact you can be so honest about your life here. I find your challenge really motivating and I'll be subbing to see how it goes for you! Best of luck with reaching your goals and please be free to message me if you need some support Quote Human Level: 1 STR: 2 | DEX: 0 | STA: 2 | CON: 4 | WIS: 1 | CHA: 1 Link to comment
Robpocalypse Posted June 6, 2014 Report Share Posted June 6, 2014 Everyone goes through stages of saying "f--k it, things don't change" but they did change when you decided to take that first step and do some exercise, or eat better. Even if it was only for a limited time you broke that inaction loop. All you need to do then is string together a number of those cycles where you break bad habits and before you know it you're forming a pattern and then a life style change. Good luck! Quote Link to comment
Rubydaisies Posted June 6, 2014 Report Share Posted June 6, 2014 Hi Fia. Thank you for being so honest and clear. Good luck in this challenge. Will be following your progress Quote Adventurer with a long way to go Link to comment
Honest_Fia Posted June 8, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 8, 2014 Hi Fia! First of all I have to say I admire the fact you can be so honest about your life here. I find your challenge really motivating and I'll be subbing to see how it goes for you! Best of luck with reaching your goals and please be free to message me if you need some support What's subbing? Sorry I haven't been around for a few days, everyone. Quote Follow my first challenge here: http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/49399-honest-fias-first-challenge/ Link to comment
Domino427 Posted June 8, 2014 Report Share Posted June 8, 2014 Fia, First, let me say I'm very proud of you for the progress you've already made and the resolve you're showing to be happy and love yourself. That's very admirable and I'm sure can be a great challenge sometimes. Keep up the great work! Finally, best of luck as you work on these goals! I'm sure you'll do great!!! Quote Level 1 Elf - Professional Goal: Ranger (with a little bit of Warrior)STR 1 | DEX 2 | STA 1 | CON 2 | WIS 2 | CHA 2 Current Challenge Don't Give Up:Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish - John Quincy Adams Overcome Anxiety: You don't have to control your thoughts. You just have to stop letting them control you - Dan Millman Failure Has a Purpose:Why do we fall sir? So we might learn to pick ourselves up -Alfred (Batman Begins) Link to comment
Honest_Fia Posted June 8, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 8, 2014 Thank you everyone for the support! I'm happy to be here. Quote Follow my first challenge here: http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/49399-honest-fias-first-challenge/ Link to comment
Devlin Posted June 8, 2014 Report Share Posted June 8, 2014 Sounds like you've already kicked some serious ass and overcame a lot already. You've got this . Subbed for the journey Quote Link to comment
Leigh Posted June 10, 2014 Report Share Posted June 10, 2014 Subbing means subscribing I think. It means we've got this thread on our personal little list of things to follow it's a handy way to keep track of threads you find helpful/inspiring/funny etc. 1 Quote Link to comment
Zee_ Posted June 11, 2014 Report Share Posted June 11, 2014 The lasses of The Queen O' Swords bid you welcome! & Just remember... 'an don't you go a-forgettin that! We look forward to seeing more from you and how you go 1 Quote Egg, Level 1 Dragon, Adventurer | STR 2 | DEX 0 | STA 1 | CON 0 | WIS 7 | CHA 0 1 2 Link to comment
Honest_Fia Posted June 11, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2014 The lasses of The Queen O' Swords bid you welcome! & Just remember... 'an don't you go a-forgettin that! We look forward to seeing more from you and how you go This brought a much needed smile to my face today. Thank you! YiS,Fia 2 Quote Follow my first challenge here: http://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/49399-honest-fias-first-challenge/ Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.