Scumspawn Posted June 23, 2015 Report Share Posted June 23, 2015 Hi, just a heads up, I am fat, grumpy and feel sorry for myself, I'll get that bit over and done with first. If you want to skip the first 4 paragraphs that is fine by me, I just needed to get it out of my system. I'm nearly 48, about a stone overweight, hate myself, don't fit into any of my clothes, drag myself around all day and seek solace in cake and biscuits. My oestragen levels are dropping and I have no temperature control, my skin is bad (connected to menopause) and I feel like I look twice my age. I don't sleep well, never have and I'm stressed out. My blood pressure is high. I get migraines that last for days.I keep trying to sort myself out but I despise myself so much for letting myself get this way that I jeapordise attempts to make things better by drinking too much at the weekend and eating sugary biscuity stuff I don't even like much when I feel anxious. I have a gym membership, and did have a personal trainer at the start of the year but she sort of did a runner, so that didn't do my self esteem or motivation any good. I really don't like the gym because of the loud music. The gym with no music closed. I've done something to my knee - osteo says it's complicated but not terrible. It hurts if I cycle or use an elliptical trainer.I'm self employed and I'm a single parent to a child with special needs.ANYWAY, that is the pity fest out of the way.I found Nerd Fitness when Googling 'how to find motivation to get fit'. Google led me to the idea about leveling up and making it a game and it sounds like something that might work for me. Having a character and de-personalising it all might just do it for me. I really like the idea of stats.I've signed up for a 6 week challenge,I've been to the osteo to check I'm not going to make my knee worse if I exercise on it.I've joined a local online C25K groupI've got a new personal trainer once a week for the next 4 weeks.On Monday I started tracking my food properly on Myfitnesspal, and I'm playing with macros to get enough carbs to sleep but low enough to lose weight.I like the way the first challenge has something to aim for - stats at week 3 (unless I'm wrong about that). And I am accountable to the personal trainer. Myfitnesspal helps because it tells me how much I'll weigh if I continue to eat as I am in 5 weeks.I work from home so I can make sure I take breaks out in the garden, away from the computer and I'll start meditating again to control my stress.My primary motivation is to stop the migraines, they are like monster hangovers without the fun of being drunk. I'm learning to care enough about myself to sort myself out, live longer etc. I need some strategies to stop the self sabotage. 1 Quote Scumspawn the level 5 Grumpy Druid ThingSTR 8 | DEX 4 | STA 7 | CON 6 | WIS 9.75 | CHA 10.5Current challenge | Accountable to chronologically blessedBattle Log Progress bars below!Feb 2016Quest 1 - Misfit to 800 4 days out of 7 0%0% Quest 2 - Mindfulness daily 0%0% Quest 3 - Veg with every meal, 2 pints of water a day 0%0% Life Goal - Self Care 0%0% First Challenge 2nd 3rd 4th 5th Link to comment
Tanktimus the Encourager Posted June 23, 2015 Report Share Posted June 23, 2015 Welcome to the rebellion. I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. I know from experience, being down on yourself is not easy to live with. One of the first steps on the path to health is realize you are not the choices you have made. You are a unique and important individual. You wrote that you hate yourself. It pains me to hear that because I've been there. The good news is that we don't hate you. I think I can speak for the entire rebellion when I say even though we just met you we like you. This is a supportive community. Part of the reason you feel the way you do is that you've been sending yourself negative messages all this time. Try starting a new habit. Get a notebook that you will use just for this experiment. Once a day, at the same time every day, write down three positive messages to yourself. It doesn't matter if you believe them or not. For example, I'm a good person. If you start telling yourself that, you'll start believing that. If you start believing that, you'll start acting like that. If you start acting like that, you will change your whole life. You can do this! Quote Current Challenge "By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath Link to comment
Shakeel_R Posted June 23, 2015 Report Share Posted June 23, 2015 I missed your introduction topic. Do forgive me! Aloha, welcome. Quote Recovering from an epic clash with gravity, which I lost. Nobody gets out of life, alive || Senpai noticed me! || Company of unemployed superheroes Trying to get back on the forums and back in exercising in life any help motivation is welcome Link to comment
Scumspawn Posted June 24, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 24, 2015 I missed your introduction topic. Do forgive me! Aloha, welcome.That is because I did my intro after my stuff in the recruits section :-) I Appreciate your help, thank you! Welcome to the rebellion. I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. I know from experience, being down on yourself is not easy to live with. One of the first steps on the path to health is realize you are not the choices you have made. You are a unique and important individual. You wrote that you hate yourself. It pains me to hear that because I've been there. The good news is that we don't hate you. I think I can speak for the entire rebellion when I say even though we just met you we like you. This is a supportive community. Part of the reason you feel the way you do is that you've been sending yourself negative messages all this time. Try starting a new habit. Get a notebook that you will use just for this experiment. Once a day, at the same time every day, write down three positive messages to yourself. It doesn't matter if you believe them or not. For example, I'm a good person. If you start telling yourself that, you'll start believing that. If you start believing that, you'll start acting like that. If you start acting like that, you will change your whole life. You can do this!Very kind words, thank you, and I love the idea of a notebook - I have lots of notebooks that need things in them. I might combine it with a daily sketch, Huge thanks. Quote Scumspawn the level 5 Grumpy Druid ThingSTR 8 | DEX 4 | STA 7 | CON 6 | WIS 9.75 | CHA 10.5Current challenge | Accountable to chronologically blessedBattle Log Progress bars below!Feb 2016Quest 1 - Misfit to 800 4 days out of 7 0%0% Quest 2 - Mindfulness daily 0%0% Quest 3 - Veg with every meal, 2 pints of water a day 0%0% Life Goal - Self Care 0%0% First Challenge 2nd 3rd 4th 5th Link to comment
Tanktimus the Encourager Posted June 24, 2015 Report Share Posted June 24, 2015 My counselor recently suggested I include a drawing in with each day's self-affirmation, that would be a great idea for you, it would engage both sides of your brain in rewriting the tapes in your head. I saw your encouragement of favoritewaitress in her intro thread and it was great. Start talking to yourself the way you talk to her and it will change your life. 1 Quote Current Challenge "By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath Link to comment
Scumspawn Posted June 24, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 24, 2015 yep, I failed to get a notebook this morning, I'll go and find one right now.... Quote Scumspawn the level 5 Grumpy Druid ThingSTR 8 | DEX 4 | STA 7 | CON 6 | WIS 9.75 | CHA 10.5Current challenge | Accountable to chronologically blessedBattle Log Progress bars below!Feb 2016Quest 1 - Misfit to 800 4 days out of 7 0%0% Quest 2 - Mindfulness daily 0%0% Quest 3 - Veg with every meal, 2 pints of water a day 0%0% Life Goal - Self Care 0%0% First Challenge 2nd 3rd 4th 5th Link to comment
Nightside Posted June 24, 2015 Report Share Posted June 24, 2015 Welcome aboard, this place is great with no judgement in fact the more you have to do to level up the more encourgement you get.You will be amoung friends you have never and probably will never meet but you will make friends.Many will give and have already given great advice, mine is to log everything, maybe on My Fitness Pal and I find my Fitbit is a great motivator.Good luck, dont be a stranger and dont give up. 1 Quote It's never to late to be the person you always wanted to be.The voice in your head telling you that you can't do it is a damn liar.Endorphins, the best high you can have. Link to comment
Scumspawn Posted June 24, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 24, 2015 Welcome aboard, this place is great with no judgement in fact the more you have to do to level up the more encourgement you get.You will be amoung friends you have never and probably will never meet but you will make friends.Many will give and have already given great advice, mine is to log everything, maybe on My Fitness Pal and I find my Fitbit is a great motivator.Good luck, dont be a stranger and dont give up.Thanks, everyone has been really supportive, I just need to get on with it now and learn that I'm worth sorting out Quote Scumspawn the level 5 Grumpy Druid ThingSTR 8 | DEX 4 | STA 7 | CON 6 | WIS 9.75 | CHA 10.5Current challenge | Accountable to chronologically blessedBattle Log Progress bars below!Feb 2016Quest 1 - Misfit to 800 4 days out of 7 0%0% Quest 2 - Mindfulness daily 0%0% Quest 3 - Veg with every meal, 2 pints of water a day 0%0% Life Goal - Self Care 0%0% First Challenge 2nd 3rd 4th 5th Link to comment
Tanktimus the Encourager Posted June 25, 2015 Report Share Posted June 25, 2015 Thanks, everyone has been really supportive, I just need to get on with it now and learn that I'm worth sorting outYou are so worth it. Tell yourself that multiple times a day. Quote Current Challenge "By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath Link to comment
Scumspawn Posted June 25, 2015 Author Report Share Posted June 25, 2015 You are so worth it. Tell yourself that multiple times a day.well that is going straight in the notebook, especially after todays miserable way over calorie/carbs/fat allowance. huge thanks, just what I needed 1 Quote Scumspawn the level 5 Grumpy Druid ThingSTR 8 | DEX 4 | STA 7 | CON 6 | WIS 9.75 | CHA 10.5Current challenge | Accountable to chronologically blessedBattle Log Progress bars below!Feb 2016Quest 1 - Misfit to 800 4 days out of 7 0%0% Quest 2 - Mindfulness daily 0%0% Quest 3 - Veg with every meal, 2 pints of water a day 0%0% Life Goal - Self Care 0%0% First Challenge 2nd 3rd 4th 5th Link to comment
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