Lachy Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 What about it strikes you as patronizing, out of curiosity?Someone linked to it a little while ago, I can't recall exactly what it was, but the writting angered me. It seemed to be along the same lines of pickup artists. I felt like it was saying that you are wrong for thinking and acting the way you do, and to be better you must change your behaviour. I find that pretty offensive, because I'm awesome. If some people don't appreciate my awesomeness (and your awesomeness), that's there loss. I felt like it was telling me I am broken if I exhibit any of these behaviours. I'm not broken, society is. Quote Battle Log - Facebook Link to comment
aj_rock Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 Someone linked to it a little while ago, I can't recall exactly what it was, but the writting angered me. It seemed to be along the same lines of pickup artists. I felt like it was saying that you are wrong for thinking and acting the way you do, and to be better you must change your behaviour. I find that pretty offensive, because I'm awesome. If some people don't appreciate my awesomeness (and your awesomeness), that's there loss. I felt like it was telling me I am broken if I exhibit any of these behaviours. I'm not broken, society is.I remember reading only ONE article pertaining to pick-up artists, and all he did was rate/explain them. Far from telling people they need to be pick-up artists.I think the whole point of the advice given is that if you think there's something wrong with you, and you go to this website seeking help, then you are pretty much seeking behaviour modification.I mean, a lot of his points about the behavious exhibited by nerds... well, they're correct. The body language, the incongruity, the 'nice guy/girl' stigmata... that's not how you 'act', its an unconscious behaviour. Not necessarily referring to you personally, but does slouching make you an awesome person? How about appearing creeping to the opposite sex? Bad hygiene? Overt fanaticism? These are all categorically 'nerdy' behaviours, but do you really think they impact positively on anyone's life? Just asking.As for 'I'm not broken, society is', Ahem: 'Don' hate da playa, hate da game!' Quote Why must I put a name on the foods I choose to eat and how I choose to eat them? Rather than tell people that I eat according to someone else's arbitrary rules, I'd rather just tell them, I eat healthy. And no, my diet does not have a name.My daily battle log! Link to comment
Atalan Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 Ahem: 'Don' hate da playa, hate da game!' I hate that phrase. If there weren't any players, there wouldn't be a game. Quote Link to comment
morethanjustamom Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 I just wonder, if you have friends, then how can you say you are unpopular? I think everyone at some point in their lives wants what they can't have, or wants what they THINK they need to be happy. I guess I have been around long enough to have been popular, WAY popular, unpopular, abused, bullied, loved unconditionally, adored, hated, envied, teased, looked up to and looked to for guidance. There have been benefits and draw backs to all these states of being, but I entered them all knowing I was different than others. I too felt Unique was not the place to be, and fitting in an conforming was the way to go...i wanted for a period of time in my life to be the SAME and eventually learned that I couldnt have been more wrong.What I found out finally was that I felt best when I was doing the least amount of "changing" to fit in.You are perfect that way you are, unless you have major emotional issues from deep seated events in your life that need a professional therapist or doctor to balance (which I highly recommend and support, no one should go through traumatic stress or emotional imbalance alone!) then no amount of changing or pretending to be something you are not will make you happy. At the end of the day, learning to SIT with yourself, in silence and accept, hey, I am like this and those who love me will love me and will come to me and those who don't are simply missing out, well, then you have found your Zen baby and you will be in the center of self love.In the dark of night and our loneliest hour, WE are all we have, and being in love with US is the most important thing.This. I wish there was a like, +1 or thanks button on here! Quote The old believe everything; the middle aged suspect everything: the young know everything. ~Oscar Wilde Link to comment
Lachy Posted February 22, 2012 Report Share Posted February 22, 2012 I remember reading only ONE article pertaining to pick-up artists, and all he did was rate/explain them. Far from telling people they need to be pick-up artists.I think the whole point of the advice given is that if you think there's something wrong with you, and you go to this website seeking help, then you are pretty much seeking behaviour modification.I mean, a lot of his points about the behavious exhibited by nerds... well, they're correct. The body language, the incongruity, the 'nice guy/girl' stigmata... that's not how you 'act', its an unconscious behaviour. Not necessarily referring to you personally, but does slouching make you an awesome person? How about appearing creeping to the opposite sex? Bad hygiene? Overt fanaticism? These are all categorically 'nerdy' behaviours, but do you really think they impact positively on anyone's life? Just asking.As for 'I'm not broken, society is', Ahem: 'Don' hate da playa, hate da game!' You could be right, I didn't go too deep into the site. I certainly didn't click with it, maybe I'm just not the audience. If it helps others then that's great, maybe one day I'll give it another look over. I don't think those behaviors you mentioned are specific to nerds though, it's a sterotype. I do hope you're being ironic about the playa/game thing. Internet makes it hard to tell sometimes. Quote Battle Log - Facebook Link to comment
aj_rock Posted February 23, 2012 Report Share Posted February 23, 2012 I thought the throat clearing was a good enough indication of sarcasm...Funny though, the behaviors I mentioned end up being stereotypically true because people will conform to them by societal pressures. If you are a nerd, and society says you should be awkward, then unconsciously you will trend towards that behavior. The entire point that I got from a lot of articles was to simply be more aware of who you are, what your personal identity is, what you want your personal identity to be, etc. The more comfortable you are with BEING who you are (and with the griping that you see from a lot of people who identify with being 'nerdy', I, at least, get the sense that a lot of us are NOT comfortable with our identity), the better you will feel overall. Regardless of the original intent of the website, that is what the focus is, with the better articles that he's written.Not saying that everything the man writes is gold, but at least the identity stuff is worth a once-over.Finally, like I said, the statement was sarcastic. But the best sarcasm always holds a grain of truth. When the game is 'living in a society', then the players are 'everyone', and it's hard to get by, by just 'not playing'. You can't fix the problems you perceive with society (well unless you go mad doctor on us all and start mind-controlling everyone), so railing against the 'system' really doesn't do you any favors. That being said, the people who tend to hate games are the ones who perform poorly at them. Quote Why must I put a name on the foods I choose to eat and how I choose to eat them? Rather than tell people that I eat according to someone else's arbitrary rules, I'd rather just tell them, I eat healthy. And no, my diet does not have a name.My daily battle log! Link to comment
Guest guest4729 Posted February 23, 2012 Report Share Posted February 23, 2012 Sounds like you're totally like me, an ISTJ.You should take the Myers-Briggs personality test to see what you are. :3 Quote Link to comment
Lachy Posted February 23, 2012 Report Share Posted February 23, 2012 aj, i hear you. Wasn't aware *ahem* was sarcasm, glad to know I'm quite comfortable with who I am. I've no intention of going Mad Doctor, though if got a "Dr. Horrible" outfit, that'd be pretty cool. I'd have to work on my laugh.Maybe it's a cutural thing? I know from experience Aussies and Americans have different attitudes about personalities and behaviours. I guess the site just rubs me wrong.By the way, no anger or anything here from me. Wasn't sure if I was coming over a bit hard on the whole thing or what. I'm happy having the conversation, and ultimately the whole thing doesn't bother me much. Quote Battle Log - Facebook Link to comment
reboundstudent Posted February 23, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 23, 2012 Sounds like you're totally like me, an ISTJ.You should take the Myers-Briggs personality test to see what you are. :3INFJ! So, only two letters off. I'm supposed to have very expressed intuitive... which when combined with feeling and judging is probably why I'm so gosh darn annoying. I'm like a wacky combination of Hermione Granger and Luna Lovegood! Quote "Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself." -Mark Twain Link to comment
aj_rock Posted February 23, 2012 Report Share Posted February 23, 2012 aj, i hear you. Wasn't aware *ahem* was sarcasm, glad to know I'm quite comfortable with who I am. I've no intention of going Mad Doctor, though if got a "Dr. Horrible" outfit, that'd be pretty cool. I'd have to work on my laugh.Maybe it's a cutural thing? I know from experience Aussies and Americans have different attitudes about personalities and behaviours. I guess the site just rubs me wrong.By the way, no anger or anything here from me. Wasn't sure if I was coming over a bit hard on the whole thing or what. I'm happy having the conversation, and ultimately the whole thing doesn't bother me much.No problems. It's just something *else* that I happen to be passionate about.I used to be one of those typical nerdy type kids, until, one day, I just decided I didn't wanna put up with the shit anymore. So I started working towards being the person who I wanted to be.As a result, I tend to be more of a jerk, more stubborn, more self-sufficient, more amoral, and a helluva lot more awesome. Might not all seem like pros to the outsider, but I sure as hell have a lot more fun this way.But... yeah. In general, comfortability with who you are goes a long way with life-satisfaction. Not saying any one person here per say, but just in general. Quote Why must I put a name on the foods I choose to eat and how I choose to eat them? Rather than tell people that I eat according to someone else's arbitrary rules, I'd rather just tell them, I eat healthy. And no, my diet does not have a name.My daily battle log! Link to comment
oystergirl Posted February 24, 2012 Report Share Posted February 24, 2012 This. I wish there was a like, +1 or thanks button on here!Thanks momma, If there is anything in my life that I am thankful for it is actually learning something from my experiences...big hugs! Quote The real world is bizarre enough for me....Blue Oyster Cult! Oystergirl: Bad Assed Lightcaster (aka wizard!) STR: 2 | DEX: 3 | CON: 3 | STA: 2 | WIS: 4 | CHA: 5 Oystergirl's Bad Ass Lightcaster Wicked Rocking Adventure Challenge! Come visit my wicked rocking Nerd Fitness blog! Link to comment
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