Challenge Already Looking Dim

[tungstenmouse]

So I've encountered a couple problems with my challenge already. I got really sick but I'm getting better so that shouldn't hold me back any further. However, two of my goals just hit a wall. I've never experienced a challenge before so I'd like some advice from those with more experience.

First, my mother sat down with me and talked about how she wants to lose weight as well. I've been *trying* to keep a paleo diet. Not always successful but I have been trying. However, she asked me to quit that for a month and to try Weight Watchers with her. If it doesn't work then I may return to paleo but if it works then I should continue. I agreed because I want to support her. It was tempting because now I shall have a partner that will be constantly with me. But I will have to give up paleo. She made it clear that I can't do both (although I can still give up sugar).

Next, I checked out the listings at the local college to complete one of my level-up-my-life goals. However, they have greatly increased the price for tuition on summer classes. I won't be able to afford it. So that's one goal I won't be able to fulfill.

So how do I go about my challenge? Do I just fulfill what I can and forget the rest? Do I go back and alter my goals?

Thank you.

[bigm141414]

Hey setbacks happen. If you have to reevaluate your goals in order to be the most successful then sure that is completely fine! I've failed at several of my previous challenge goals. Failing just makes you better at setting them. Just don't get discouraged and vainish on us!

[Elastigirl]

I think you should adjust your goals and keep the cahllenge. For the weight, it would still be no sugar but now your plan is to follow weight watchers. If I were you, I'd limit or cut out any unrefined grain especially, white bread.

For college, adjust your goal, maybe think of how you can afford it in the fall. How much $ will you need? See if you can make a plan to be able to have the money by fall.

[LRB]

I'm confused - why can't you eat Paleo while doing WW? I've done WW before (not while eating Paleo, but still . . . ) and one of their big things is that you can eat whatever you want -- just not always in the quantities you want. If you're eating primarily fruits, vegetables and meats, then your daily points total will be pretty low, as fruits and vegetables are 0 points (if I recall correctly).

But to answer your actual question: adjust your goals and continue onward.

[joeyb]

I'm confused - why can't you eat Paleo while doing WW? I've done WW before (not while eating Paleo, but still . . . ) and one of their big things is that you can eat whatever you want -- just not always in the quantities you want. If you're eating primarily fruits, vegetables and meats, then your daily points total will be pretty low, as fruits and vegetables are 0 points (if I recall correctly).

But to answer your actual question: adjust your goals and continue onward.

My wife told me a little while ago that they changed the formula, but I don't know what it is. I'd imagine that fruits and vegetables are still 0 points, though.

@tungstenmouse I'd look at this as an opportunity to get your mom on Paleo too. If she buys into it, then you have a partner to help keep you motivated and, eventually, you guys will just drop WW altogether and go Paleo together. That's how I'd approach it anyway.

[Rosie]

Ditto for JoeyB, why not ask your mum to try paleo for a month and see how she gets on? If its no good for her you can both swap to ww?

[Morrigainz]

I am also confused why you wouldn't be able to do both. That said, none of us know your personal life so I suppose we really can't say

I would agree with others; adjust your goals and keep going! Re: school, can you look at grants, scholarships or work study? And of course there are always loans...that's the route I am on.

Good luck and feel free to lean on us! Don't get discouraged!

[Moxie Hart]

I did weight watchers and paleo for a month or two before I dropped WW .... you can absolutely do the two together. Its just calorie counting. I ignored the good health guidelines that say to eat whole grains and milk and continued on my merry way. And in fact it means you get to eat more food... just be careful and don't over do your fruit. But that is true of paleo as a general rule.

[Guest Snake McClain]

i'll just say that weight watchers will work but ONLY because you are at a calorie decrease. Paleo will shed fat and help build muscle just because of the nature of the diet. You need to decide if doing it to help your mom is as important or more important or whatever than doing it the way you know you should. HOWEVER!!!! different things work for different people. A lot of people can't eat the weight watchers lifestyle forever as it is too much work and isn't sustainable. at least the people i know. That said maybe do weight watchers with her for a month (but she'll need to keep at some type of healthy diet or the weight will come back) and then switch to paleo for you. Your call.

[UncleTone]

I think it is possible to do both Paleo and WW...the fruits and vegetables will be 0 points. The meat, almonds, milk etc are the only things you will have to count. WW will definitely work in losing weight if you can stick with it because, like Bruce said, you will be running a calorie deficit. However, WW was not sustainable for me and took a bit more work than Paleo/Primal does for me now.

You could certainly do it for a month with your mom, and then ask her to do a month of Paleo and see which one works for both of you. It is completely possible to have WW and paleo under the same roof. Right now I am transitioning to paleo (pretty much complete but I have a lot of learning to do) and my wife is continuing to eat the way she has always eaten (although she is starting to eat healthier with me doing paleo).

If your mom is set on you not doing paleo then I would say just adjust your goals and move on from there. You can tweak them now and then continue working to reach the original goal. Lord knows I have failed to meet some of my goals, but I just adjust and keep going.

Like others said, whatever you do, don't disappear on us.

[tungstenmouse]

As to why I can't do both, I did some prying and it turns out she has been really worried and doesn't like the diet. She just asked for a month so I decided to give it that. Then I will try paleo again. I can already see where this is going but she asked for thirty days so I'll give her that. I also got told the same thing by my best friend who is, ironically, doing a low-carb diet as well. It seems prejudices run deep.

Thanks for the opinions and encouragement, you guys. I will need it in the coming weeks. Thank you so much.

[Guest Snake McClain]

As to why I can't do both, I did some prying and it turns out she has been really worried and doesn't like the diet. She just asked for a month so I decided to give it that. Then I will try paleo again. I can already see where this is going but she asked for thirty days so I'll give her that. I also got told the same thing by my best friend who is, ironically, doing a low-carb diet as well. It seems prejudices run deep.

Thanks for the opinions and encouragement, you guys. I will need it in the coming weeks. Thank you so much.

it seems very strange to me that people have a problem with eating just meat and veggies. this makes no sense to me.

[unicornassassin]

As to why I can't do both, I did some prying and it turns out she has been really worried and doesn't like the diet. She just asked for a month so I decided to give it that. Then I will try paleo again. I can already see where this is going but she asked for thirty days so I'll give her that. I also got told the same thing by my best friend who is, ironically, doing a low-carb diet as well. It seems prejudices run deep.

.

Well this raises the question, is she really interested in losing weight, or is she just trying to get you off Paleo? If it's the latter, then how big of a support will she be on WW?

I'm always a fan of doing what I want to do, and supporting others in what they want to do.

As far as the college goal, maybe your new goal could be to save x number of dollars toward it? Regardless, I agree with everyone else- adjust, adjust, adjust!

[UncleTone]

it seems very strange to me that people have a problem with eating just meat and veggies. this makes no sense to me.

They hear "I only eat meat and veggies" and they automatically think you are only eating a pound of bacon at every meal, and only if that bacon is wrapped around a roasted pig basted in butter. I call it the Atkins effect. They are afraid of all cholesterol, not just the bad stuff, and they think you will clog your arteries and have a massive heart attack.

They somehow believe that their giant bagel with cream cheese, or low fat banana muffin and caramel macchiato for breakfast is healthier than when we eat chicken or steak and vegetables for breakfast.

[Morrigainz]

*shrug* To each their own...and there is nothing WRONG with trying WW. Especially if it will help you two support each other. Good luck to you and like UncleTone said, just don't disappear! Just because many (vocal) people on here are paleo doesn't mean that it's the be-all end-all solution for everyone. And if you decide to stick with WW, we will support you just the same

Good luck!

[Waldo]

it seems very strange to me that people have a problem with eating just meat and veggies. this makes no sense to me.

Completely ditching 2 food groups (grains/dairy) is worrysome to people. Especially dairy. If lactose intolerance isn't an issue, dairy is grow juice and an especially important source of calcium. Especially coming from a parent, who has been giving you milk from the day you were born. If you are ever worried about your kids being undernourashed nutritionally, give them more milk is pretty much the default way to solve it. This is going to be strongly ingrained in many parents, especially mothers who are at the age where doctors stress the importance of calcium for women and stress that it should be a lifetime thing.

It might be worth it to find out if ditching the dairy is the bigger issue for your mom. Paleo + dairy is a very common approach.

You can't forget that the big review of diets (US News?) considers Paleo the worst possible diet, ranked dead last, lists it as dangerous and considers it a fad diet. Most people looking for an unbiased review will find that first if they google paleo diet to learn about it. Not that I disagree with them though.

You get out of Weight Watchers what you put in. It is more or less calorie counting for dummies. Just like couting on your own there isn't a ton of guidance for eating a better diet, it is up to you to learn to eat better so you get more bang for your food buck.

[empeg9000]

My fiance and I both do WW because it helps her track her foods and she wanted me to do it with her. So I do but I also eat paleo. I come in way under my points value almost every day. WW does seem to penalize you when you eat a generous helping of any meat product. Veggies and fruits are zero points for a serving.

[bgvanbur]

It seems prejudices run deep.

It seems everyone thinks their idea of a healthy diet and any other diet is unhealthy in comparison. They will try to get you to switch diets, give you tips, and others may even try to sabotage it. Just try and find a diet that works for you since there are so many healthy diets to choose from.

[starmadepath]

My father is fond of saying: you need to have a plan from which to deviate. Go into any plan expecting things to change. It's easier than setting it as unyielding, because then you feel like you're failing if circumstances out of your control or only tangentially in your control make things impossible. (What you can control in life is you, your choices, your actions, your responses to what life presents you with, you cannot control what it is that life presents you.)

However, she asked me to quit that for a month and to try Weight Watchers with her. ... But I will have to give up paleo. She made it clear that I can't do both (although I can still give up sugar).

My personal experience with WW:

I know Weight Watchers has changed their program since I last did it, but part of the point of the Weight Watchers diet is supposed to be that it's flexible, so I don't honestly see any reason why you couldn't keep primarily eating paleo and just ignore their recommendations about daily carb intake. Weight Watchers, to put it simply, is a calorie counter program with smaller numbers. They've come up with formulas to place value on the calories you're in-taking but they're still looking to create a calorie deficit. I was working with a personal trainer while doing Weight Watchers, and their formula had me eating somewhere around 1,200 cal a day, which meant I didn't make any strength gains and actually stalled in losing because I didn't have the energy to keep up training the way I had been, so I would exercise caution. Trainer told me I needed to eat more if I wanted lean muscle gains (that's when I started working with a nutritionist). Weight Watchers is designed for people who don't exercise much and it ends up losing a lot of lean muscle in the process because of the steep calorie deficit. And that's fine if you're not training hard, but just keep an eye on how your food intake impacts your ability to make strength gains, etc. Ultimately, you have to do what you think will work for you.

Next, I checked out the listings at the local college to complete one of my level-up-my-life goals. However, they have greatly increased the price for tuition on summer classes. I won't be able to afford it. So that's one goal I won't be able to fulfill.

I teach myself a lot of stuff - including learning to read textbooks for fun. It's bizarre how much I hated it while in school, but now I'm hungry for knowledge. Is it possible that the type of class you wanted to take is something you could teach yourself about through reading library books or surfing the web? If it's something you have a passion for, it'll be a breeze and it'll give you a head-start when you can afford the classes.

So how do I go about my challenge? Do I just fulfill what I can and forget the rest? Do I go back and alter my goals?

I, personally, would alter them or replace them with something more manageable - but then again, I'm of the mind that "forgetting the rest" ends up feeling a little bit like giving up, and that's just not a good feeling to me, even when I know I've done everything in my power. Part of a good goal is that it's achievable, so I'd say swap your goals or tweak them so they are achievable.

And as MirGSS basically said, follow the right path for you (which will, with 99.9% certainty, not be the exact same path as me or anyone else on here) and the community will support you as best we can. You got this.

[shiggles]

Your goals which may have seemed reasonable to start, have not changed to unreasonable goals. That's OK, you have taken the first step in identifying that. So you need to change your goals - this isn't a big deal. Adjust them as necessary.

Now to your goals. Paleo on WW is certainly possible. It's not the easiest thing to do but certainly possible. I'm going to presume that you are living with your mother and that's one of the main reasons to do it together. First off it's not going to be easy if you are sharing meals and she prefers more conventional meals, and you lean towards paleo. So this is where you can be sneaky and try to lead her towards paleo options but don't mention the work 'paleo' at all. Say something like, "hey Mum (Mom?) look, if I get some lean bacon and eggs and have this for breakfast, it's really not that many points" or "If we ditch the bread and have salads instead of sandwiches look how much more food we can eat and keep within our points".

The other sticking point you may find is the WW meeting if you go to them. They are supposed to be there to give support and practical advice. Most of the practical advice regarding food will be conventional diet including grains which you can ignore. What I would suggest in this regard is to read up as much as you can about paleo (and why not primal as well) before you go to the meetings so then you can make an informed decision on what to ignore and possibly challenge. Personally I started and quit WW because a lot of the talk and 'advice' set off my bullshit meter. And this was well before reading up about proper eating.

And for those posters above, I believe WW now counts points towards fruit.

Regarding your other challenge you can still learn on the cheap. You won't necessary get a qualification out of it but you can still take the initiative and read up on a bunch of stuff. Use the libraries - they are a fantastic and undervalued resource. Maybe give yourself a particular subject and go out to learn about and research it.