I used to be scared of the gym

[WhenWorldIsMine]

So, I used to be scared of the gym. So much so that at first, I had to psych myself up with cold showers or berserker mode just to get myself through the door! I'm glad to say that's gradually changed. I thought I'd share what I learned here so that it might help others.

 

What I thought before - why I was scared

 

I guess I was self-conscious. A skinny-fat guy struggling to lift tiny <10kg weights surrounded by much bigger lads who were easily hauling 30kg and beyond, who was I kidding?! It certainly didn't help that those big lads strongly reminded me of the lads that gave me grief at school for being a skinny nerd! I was scared of looking out-of-place, genuinely believing that I really had no real right to be there.

 

Does that resonate with anyone at all??

 

So, what changed?

 

Over the course of my 1st week going to the gym (as early as possible to avoid crowds), a few things dawned on me.

1. I was essentially invisible. It was rare that my presence was at all noted by the other gym-users.
2. On the rare occasions when the big lads and I made eye contact, I didn't see condescension in their eyes, I saw respect. I guess that either they respected that I was there for similar reasons to them, to improve myself, or they saw their earlier selves in me. Either way, I felt bad for judging them so harshly based on a passing resemblance to my old school bullies!
3. One time I caught a heavier kid glancing in my direction, the look on his eyes suggested he was seeking to look more like I do now. That blew my mind! But then I realised, we're all on different stages of our journeys.

I'm not scared anymore

 

Now, nearly a month into using the gym, I'm not scared anymore. It's just part of my morning routine 3 times a week. I don't feel intimidated by the big lads anymore. After all, eventually in a year or two I'll be one of them! I don't feel out-of-place at all and I feel I have as much right to be there as anyone else!

 

If you feel like I did, do push yourself to go just 3 times. By the 3rd time you won't be scared at all I guarantee it.

[I-Jo]

I wish more people could have this experience- because it's incredibly common and it's what we try to tell people ALL the time- it's frustrating to watch people miss out on training because of almost an imaginary self created issue. 

 

But- Super proud of you for getting out there and getting over it!!  

 

IN FOR THE GAINZ

[Guzzi]

Ha! I'm so glad you posted this. Everyone has to start somewhere, and so many of us on here know just how intimidating it can be.

It's great to hear your perspective and how that's changed after just a month. All power to you man! *highfive!*

I've had a couple of links for a while that I wanted to post up, but wasn't sure where to do it. I think this thread would be perfect, as long as you don't mind.

http://www.carrie-patrick.com/blog/2013/08/tiny-pink-dumbbells/

http://gustavoalfaro.com/2014/03/dont-make-fun/

[SevenofSeven]

Thank you Guzzi. Just awesome!

[Haikoo]

Yes! So proud of you!

 

I recently had a similar experience. 

 

I haven't been afraid of the gym in general. I've been going to the gym for a few years, using the cardio machines, track, taking various classes--but have always been TERRIFIED of the free weights section. After coming to NF and seeing so many other women who picked up heavy things, I really wanted to try it myself. That was two years ago. 

 

This whole time, I kept glancing occasionally, not wanting to stare, but the thought of going over there was paralyzing. I think i was afraid of some of the same things. They're going to look at me, I'm going to do it wrong.  I whined about it to hubby, I whined about it in NF chat. Didn't do anything about it though. Then finally a few months ago I tried dead lifting off in a tiny corner of the gym---not the free weights section, but this little area far far away from there that is sometimes used by trainers. Basically no one could see me.  I loved it, but it still wasn't enough to get me into that weight section.  

 

Kept thinking and thinking about it, and finally (one month ago today) I got hubby to go with me, just as moral support. I bench pressed and I dead lifted. Then a few days later, I did it again. BY MYSELF!!  

 

Friday I dead lifted 125 lbs! That isn't a lot to most people, but it's a whole lot to me! I'm totally geeked that I am almost lifting my body weight. I also started squatting last week.  What the hell was I afraid of? And why on earth did it take me 2 years to work through it? I have no idea. But at least I got there, right?

[Chillkröte]

For me it's the danger of not knowing what i am doing. I don't know how you use the machines. I am scared of making mistakes or actually hurting myself. That's why i don't go to the gym and rather train at home with my bodyweight.

[Guzzi]

When you go to any gym for the first time they will ask you to fill out a medical questionnaire and give you a full induction on how to use all the machines properly. They have to, health and safety rules, so you shouldn't worry about that at all. It's part and parcel of everyday life for them, they won't think anything of it.

[Haikoo]

When you go to any gym for the first time they will ask you to fill out a medical questionnaire and give you a full induction on how to use all the machines properly. They have to, health and safety rules, so you shouldn't worry about that at all. It's part and parcel of everyday life for them, they won't think anything of it.

 

Guzzi is correct. You can also ask anyone who works there at any time to explain a machine to you. They will!!! You can do it!! (That is, if you want to )

[Oramac]

http://www.carrie-patrick.com/blog/2013/08/tiny-pink-dumbbells/

 

I am not afraid to admit, that article nearly brought me to tears.  Were I not at work, it probably would have.  

[Guzzi]

I am not afraid to admit, that article nearly brought me to tears. Were I not at work, it probably would have.

Yeah, me too. Kinda puts a lot of stuff into perspective doesn't it. I came across it reading through another thread, it had been posted up quite a while ago. I just wasn't sure where to post it though.

[I-Jo]

Guzzi is correct. You can also ask anyone who works there at any time to explain a machine to you. They will!!! You can do it!! (That is, if you want to  )

That's not how that works.

At a number of large gyms trainers are willing to help you but really that's not their job and they are not obligated to take that time to do so. You pay for their time specifically and they are not paid for just being there for your use whenever. Many times for that instance they will happily help because it's good business but please do not assume that just because they are there wearing a shirt they are at your disposal.

[Oramac]

That's not how that works.

At a number of large gyms trainers are willing to help you but really that's not their job and they are not obligated to take that time to do so. You pay for their time specifically and they are not paid for just being there for your use whenever. Many times for that instance they will happily help because it's good business but please do not assume that just because they are there wearing a shirt they are at your disposal.

 

Truth.  If I have a simple question they can answer in 10 words or less, I'll ask em.  If not, I always at least try to pay them.  Sometimes they decline to be paid, but it's good to at least make the offer.  

[Haikoo]

That's not how that works.

At a number of large gyms trainers are willing to help you but really that's not their job and they are not obligated to take that time to do so. You pay for their time specifically and they are not paid for just being there for your use whenever. Many times for that instance they will happily help because it's good business but please do not assume that just because they are there wearing a shirt they are at your disposal.

 

I think it more depends on the gym. 

 

I was not insinuating "for your use whenever." I just meant if you're brand new and have never used a machine before, they'll explain it to you quick. 

[cobaltflash]

Thats one of the good things about many gyms is that people are involved in what they are doing so they dont really pay attention to what others are doing.

[Zorch]

I wish more people could have this experience- because it's incredibly common and it's what we try to tell people ALL the time- it's frustrating to watch people miss out on training because of almost an imaginary self created issue. 

Over time, I've come to the conclusion that the vast majority of people at the gym are just like me - most of us just go about our business and don't pay too much attention to other people - and when we do, the general attitude is one of respect toward anyone that is in there putting in the effort.

 

There may be a few jerks/people that make snarky comments, but they are definitely in the minority.  Overall, the only thing that is likely to get a negative reaction from some people is breaches of etiquette - leaving weights all over the place, or using equipment for things it's not designed for, thereby preventing others from using it(i.e. curling in the squat rack).

[Chillkröte]

Maybe I will try it out after my injury is healed. But is it really worth it? I can train everything I need without a gym. So what a the pros?

[matty_mcfly]

Maybe I will try it out after my injury is healed. But is it really worth it? I can train everything I need without a gym. So what a the pros?

Well it depends on your goals. Personally I love getting out the house and hitting the gym and hearing the clank of iron plates hitting the floor from deadlifts and cleans. I enjoy the atmosphere but also there's no way I have the space or cash for all the equipment a gym offers.

So the pros of going to a gym would be dependent on your ability to have a home gym and/or the type of workout program you are following.

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[Oramac]

Well it depends on your goals. Personally I love getting out the house and hitting the gym and hearing the clank of iron plates hitting the floor from deadlifts and cleans. I enjoy the atmosphere but also there's no way I have the space or cash for all the equipment a gym offers.

So the pros of going to a gym would be dependent on your ability to have a home gym and/or the type of workout program you are following.

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Agreed.  I thoroughly enjoy the atmosphere in the gym versus at home.  I have occasionally done bodyweight workouts at home when I was traveling or somehow couldn't make the gym, but invariably I don't enjoy them quite as much.  

[matty_mcfly]

Agreed. I thoroughly enjoy the atmosphere in the gym versus at home. I have occasionally done bodyweight workouts at home when I was traveling or somehow couldn't make the gym, but invariably I don't enjoy them quite as much.

Same and I'm MUCH more likely to head to the gym as opposed to consistently working out at home. I'd end up finding a distraction.

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[Hermione Gainser]

This should be stickied somewhere all newbies can see it. 

[I-Jo]

Over time, I've come to the conclusion that the vast majority of people at the gym are just like me - most of us just go about our business and don't pay too much attention to other people - and when we do, the general attitude is one of respect toward anyone that is in there putting in the effort.

 

There may be a few jerks/people that make snarky comments, but they are definitely in the minority.  Overall, the only thing that is likely to get a negative reaction from some people is breaches of etiquette - leaving weights all over the place, or using equipment for things it's not designed for, thereby preventing others from using it(i.e. curling in the squat rack).

yep- no one wants to hear it but it's a pretty plain fact- no one cares. Unless you're doing something REALLY out of the ordinary- or wearing something REALLY off the wall- or exceptionally tight/short/baggy/illfitted etc- no one is going to bat an eye- we are all more concerned with what we are doing.  People watching happens esp in the weight room- but it's more ambivalent- it's not judgey.  Something to do if you will- like candy crush LOL

 

Maybe I will try it out after my injury is healed. But is it really worth it? I can train everything I need without a gym. So what a the pros?

> use of equipment

> wide variety of equipment

> possible pool, sauna, basketball courts- raquet ball courts, weight sleds- experienced lifters- spotters- yoga pants

> motivation to leave the house

> group effort if you are into that

> classes if you are into that

 

 

Well it depends on your goals. Personally I love getting out the house and hitting the gym and hearing the clank of iron plates hitting the floor from deadlifts and cleans. I enjoy the atmosphere but also there's no way I have the space or cash for all the equipment a gym offers.

So the pros of going to a gym would be dependent on your ability to have a home gym and/or the type of workout program you are following.

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^^^^

 

this-

 

the training I do would be difficult to do fully at home- and honestly I won't train at home. And I honestly hate training at home- the cats are always under foot- I have distractions- the gym is a place I love to be- it's a home away from home for me.

 

Do you need it? nope- but it can be another sanctuary if you need it.

 

I'm a deeply religious person- I go to my church of iron 3-4 times a week. I pray there- I sweat- I bleed I cry- the barbell knows my sins.  

I'm okay tithing to the church- I prefer going to church outside my house than in my house

[Oramac]

> yoga pants

 

I like how you put this as a pro for going to the gym.  I'll second that all day. And I don't even wear the things....

[I-Jo]

well... if the shoe fits  

 

I don't wear them either actually- but... nevertheless- huge perk of the gym

 

yeah- I'm a dirty 16 year old- I admit it.

[matty_mcfly]

well... if the shoe fits

I don't wear them either actually- but... nevertheless- huge perk of the gym

yeah- I'm a dirty 16 year old- I admit it.

And that's why we love you lol

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[Chillkröte]

I think it's just not worth the money at the moment. I'm a student so every penny counts for me and I'm fine with my body weight training, but I think I will try it out in the future when my rehab is finished.