Men ONLY please...

[Church]

She already is married and that isn't stopping her. Why would making both of them have affairs make a difference in her mind?

Because then he can flat out reject her, citing a happy marriage as the reason. Unless she begins to stalk him. And then go all 'Fatal Attraction' on his a$$.

On second thought, you should never, EVER listen to me.

Also, Tom: AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[The Shogun]

My only words of advice are that "guns don't kill people. Husbands that come home early do."

Hahahahahahahahaha I won't do it, that's already decided.

I've been down that road before, and it isn't pretty. Fun (for a time), but doesn't end pretty. My advice is don't do it. First, she's married. Don't do anything with a married chick until the divorce is final (or you are the one married to her). Second, you are her teacher. It may not be against the rules where you are, but you would be overstepping your bounds and it would be very unprofessional. Would you date your sensei? Or better yet (since they should be of a high moral standing), would your sensei date you? (in this situation your sensei is female that you have an interest in, may not be true in real life) You should never overstep the bounds of a teacher/pupil relationship (ignore the samurai and their apprentices for this case).

But you seem to have already decided against doing it. So for the "Oh blimey! Time for tea! I'm afraid I've got to go, dear! Toodles!" question. That is awesome, I say try it just to see the reaction (or if she even understands, being a beginner English speaker). You should explain the situation (she's married, there are teacher/pupil boundaries, she isn't even THAT hot, any others reasons you may have). Don't be condescending and just try to be pleasant about it. Also let her know that she shouldn't contact you outside of the school anymore. If she does, block her number. If she keeps with the flirting while you are at work, let your boss know and see if there is any way that (s)he could make the student switch to another ESL teacher, if available.

Also bro,

I think you need a fashion update. Haha. Rebellious isn't in anymore, fashionable (or modern) professional looks so much better.

Just thought of something. Bonus points if you write down the discussion you want to have with her in English and give it to her after class telling her to translate it into Spanish for extra credit. If she understands it as she's translating, it would be cool in a dick sort of way

I loved your reply. I know it's not pretty and doesn't end well either. I forgot to mentioned when I started working here I decided to NEVER date my students. Something I'll take with me when I build my dojo. Also, I don't wear all black anymore, I was joking there. It's the dominant color, but I try to look professional. Also, I love your way of telling her.

Then make her read it out loud. In both English and Spanish. If that doesn't work, give up all hope.

The sad part is, this would probably happen.

If that doesn't work just go out and buy a gold band to wear on your finger, it doesn't even have to be real, then poof: You're fake-married and thus, unavailable. It's fool proof!

This girl I used to work with did that. We were chatting one day when I looked down and saw a ring on her finger. I didn't remember that ever being there so I asked about it. She took it off and said she wears it so guys will stop trying to hit on her

A girl I knew did that. It seems to work... I may do that. But I have to admit that I also think what leadchipmunk says here below is true...

She already is married and that isn't stopping her. Why would making both of them have affairs make a difference in her mind?

As an Englishman... I don't know. Perhaps your friend is suggesting you should stay cool. Don't respond to her flirting, but don't run away either (which is just another response!). Ignoring her advances should eventually get the message across, but it might be hard (no innuendo intended). Confronting her about it could damage your working relationship, so don't do that unless you have to.

I wonder if she really wants to go THAT far with you. Married life can grow stale - that initial spark she had with her husband may have gone by now. It's not (necessarily) sex she's after, but the thrill of the chase, the flirting and the excitement. You may not be the first "affair" she's gone on.

I don't need to tell you not to do it. You've already figured that out for yourself.

THAT'S exactly I'm planning to do, if we were in yahoo answers you would have win =D And that's exactly what I think it's happening on her side of the field... It was what happened to me before (with another girl, she had a boyfriend, nothing related to my work). Once the thrill of the chase was gone, the game was over, and guess who lost?

G, you don't know her age, so here is the PERFECT way to end this. "So, what are you....38?"

And then when she gets offended and says: "NO, I'm 32..29,28,27.....21" you can then say: 'Wow...could've fooled me!"

BAM!

HAHAHAHAHAAHAAA

FULL OF EPIC WIN!

Because then he can flat out reject her, citing a happy marriage as the reason. Unless she begins to stalk him. And then go all 'Fatal Attraction' on his a$$.

On second thought, you should never, EVER listen to me.

Also, Tom: AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Church... you're scary... you scare the bejesus outta me.

Thanks for your advice, guys. I definitively won't do it. Little G isn't in command here anyways. As how reject her? I'll follow Sting wisdom, I'll walk but not run. The sad part is... this is not the first time this has ever happened to me. It's only the first time it's happened with a married woman. And... it makes angry and sad at the same time. As I was telling my best friend hours ago. Am I that kind of guy? What if women look at me as the kind of guy you can have an affair with? In a very, but very shallow and superficial level I like that... But the true is I don't want to be that guy. I don't want affairs, I want someone who gets to know me and realize that's not me. It worries me that it's happened more than once...

[Church]

Those are some valid concerns. I know I have the same issue with single mothers. I don't know what it is about me, but women my age who have kids just seem to flock to me. Which isn't what I'm after, I'm only in my early 20's I don't want to be a father/husband type. I can only imagine what it's like to be looking for love in a world of women who think your the 'guy on the side' type.

And yes. I frighten me too. Lol. I'm very sorry about that. But that's what happens when you have THIS much down time at work. You should hear my Zombie Plan. If only I could organize my thoughts, I could turn it into a best selling trilogy EASY. Lol.

[Artinum]

THAT'S exactly I'm planning to do, if we were in yahoo answers you would have win =D

I do haunt Yahoo Answers sometimes, actually. Mostly to reassure myself that I'm intelligent, sensible and can spell.

Church... you're scary... you scare the bejesus outta me.

Jesus scared by Church? Heh...

[Guest Snake McClain]

All I can say is run. Do everything in your power to keep it a good solid work relationship but do not under any circumstance get involved with a married woman.

[KillerGriller]

IMHO - The Sting advice is to simply handle people with care. If you don't want to (or in this case really CAN'T) be with someone, don't just bang 'em and leave, be a gentleman and "take a leisurely pace" i.e. - explain it to her, with clear limits and boundaries.

That being said (I love saying that for some reason), I have no idea to let her know that it's not going to happen until she makes a definitive move. The only thing I can suggest is mentioning over and over and over the teacher/position of authority/honour bound thing....and also limiting the amount of one-on-one time you have with her.

good luck dude.

[Tom Kenobi]

Church & Spaur: You guys are welcome. Glad I made you laugh! :::takes a bow and drops the mic like chris rock:::

[KillerGriller]

Jusst effin' do it already

[Church]

Jusst effin' do it already

This.

[Guest Snake McClain]

Jusst effin' do it already

Speaking of just F***ING doing it....

what have we all done as men to achieve a more manly position. in your life at work? home? relationships? friends? your personal life? I'm curious to hear other stories to learn from. ANy interesting things?

[Atalan]

To have a more manly position in my life at work, I got a job. Now that I'm a Retail Mercenary (actual job title), the next step is Mentor.

[Guest Snake McClain]

To have a more manly position in my life at work, I got a job. Now that I'm a Retail Mercenary (actual job title), the next step is Mentor.

Radical! so what does a retail mercenary do exactly? (sounds scary)

[Atalan]

Radical! so what does a retail mercenary do exactly? (sounds scary)

Ever go to the store and not be able to find where anything is, or a specific style of a product? I probably put in an 8 hour shift moving it all around or taking discontinued product off the shelves. Stores don't hire employees to do it, they outsource the work to number of companies, one of which I work for.

[161803398874989]

what have we all done as men to achieve a more manly position. in your life at work? home? relationships? friends? your personal life? I'm curious to hear other stories to learn from. ANy interesting things?

Next saturday I'll be going to what is technically a gay party (it's advertised as a straight-friendly gay party), while people think that I'm homophobic. So that's an image change that ought to work in my favour. Real men have no fears.

[wildross]

Could be a girly thing too but went out of my comfort zone and competed in a powerlifting meet.

Sent from my DROID4 using Tapatalk 2

[leadchipmunk]

it makes angry and sad at the same time. As I was telling my best friend hours ago. Am I that kind of guy? What if women look at me as the kind of guy you can have an affair with? In a very, but very shallow and superficial level I like that... But the true is I don't want to be that guy. I don't want affairs, I want someone who gets to know me and realize that's not me. It worries me that it's happened more than once...

Do you want to be "that guy" (you already answered no), then you aren't that guy. You are not anything unless you accept it as a part of you.

Those are some valid concerns. I know I have the same issue with single mothers. I don't know what it is about me, but women my age who have kids just seem to flock to me. Which isn't what I'm after, I'm only in my early 20's I don't want to be a father/husband type. I can only imagine what it's like to be looking for love in a world of women who think your the 'guy on the side' type.

And yes. I frighten me too. Lol. I'm very sorry about that. But that's what happens when you have THIS much down time at work. You should hear my Zombie Plan. If only I could organize my thoughts, I could turn it into a best selling trilogy EASY. Lol.

You're lucky, I figured out today that I'm on the opposite side of the boat. For some reason, I am extremely attracted towards single mothers. You're in the same age group as me, send them my way.

what have we all done as men to achieve a more manly position. in your life at work? home? relationships? friends? your personal life? I'm curious to hear other stories to learn from. ANy interesting things?

Naw, nothing I can think of. Best I can give is that I had to requalify for my private security firearms certificate today. Passed with flying colors (mostly lead and brass colors). I think I need to man up my life.

[BarefootDawsy]

Could be a girly thing too but went out of my comfort zone and competed in a powerlifting meet.

Sent from my DROID4 using Tapatalk 2

How'd it go?

[Sloth the Enduring]

Next saturday I'll be going to what is technically a gay party (it's advertised as a straight-friendly gay party), while people think that I'm homophobic. So that's an image change that ought to work in my favour. Real men have no fears.

You'll have to tell us how it goes. I always feel awkward at gay parties, actually at most parties, but especially at gay parties. This fall I'm going to a big gay wedding, should be interesting.

[leadchipmunk]

Next saturday I'll be going to what is technically a gay party (it's advertised as a straight-friendly gay party), while people think that I'm homophobic. So that's an image change that ought to work in my favour. Real men have no fears.

What may I ask is different between a gay party and a "normal" party? Do they party differently than straight or bi people?

I could understand if it was a party where only gays were invited, but the "straight-friendly gay party" part is where I'm confused.

[wildross]

How'd it go?

Pretty well http://www.nerdfitness.com/community/showthread.php?13431-Wildross-June-to-July-challenge-thread&p=225937&viewfull=1#post225937

[Church]

Do you want to be "that guy" (you already answered no), then you aren't that guy. You are not anything unless you accept it as a part of you.

You're lucky, I figured out today that I'm on the opposite side of the boat. For some reason, I am extremely attracted towards single mothers. You're in the same age group as me, send them my way.

Naw, nothing I can think of. Best I can give is that I had to requalify for my private security firearms certificate today. Passed with flying colors (mostly lead and brass colors). I think I need to man up my life.

The single mothers I tended to get were mostly wreaks. Except for my ex. She seemed to have her ducks in a row, at least for the most part. But at the end of the day, it was time to move on because I just wasn't in love and, as much as she denied it, she was looking to complete a family unit. Frankly, I'm just not there yet.

Now honestly my love life has gone straight to hell since then, but hey, at least she has a shot at finding the right guy now that she's not pinning her hopes on me, and I DIDN'T hurt a kid in any way, shape or form. (I'm proud of that last one) there's no reason to drag kids into grown up things, they get attached and then hurt REALLY easily)

[Sloth the Enduring]

What may I ask is different between a gay party and a "normal" party? Do they party differently than straight or bi people?

I could understand if it was a party where only gays were invited, but the "straight-friendly gay party" part is where I'm confused.

The shoes. At gay parties everyone has really nice shoes. And better food. At least in my little corner of South Minneapolis. Otherwise same old boring chit chat, then I drink too much trying to loosen up, then I find a quiet corner to snooze in until my wife wakes me up to go home. Just like at any other party.

[leadchipmunk]

I DIDN'T hurt a kid in any way, shape or form. (I'm proud of that last one) there's no reason to drag kids into grown up things, they get attached and then hurt REALLY easily)

In a situation like that, this is the best thing you could hope for.

The shoes. At gay parties everyone has really nice shoes. And better food. At least in my little corner of South Minneapolis. Otherwise same old boring chit chat, then I drink too much trying to loosen up, then I find a quiet corner to snooze in until my wife wakes me up to go home. Just like at any other party.

Sounds like somebody needs to go shoe shopping?

[Sloth the Enduring]

Sounds like somebody needs to go shoe shopping?

I have brown work boots, black dress shoes, running sneakers, everyday sneakers, and sandals for the beach. Surely that covers the entire spectrum of shoe needs.

[leadchipmunk]

I have brown work boots, black dress shoes, running sneakers, everyday sneakers, and sandals for the beach. Surely that covers the entire spectrum of shoe needs.

Everything except your party shoes