How to stop lurking?

[fyretooth]

I mean, lurking is a great skill to have as an assassin, <wink wink> but it's kind of bothering me. I've gotten some great advice (thanks Church and Dillpedo) and some wonderful praise (fire.eagle, Happienumber, and Church, you guys are all awesome), and I even feel like I've let them down if I miss a workout.

But I can't seem to return any of their favors. The idea of posting on someone's topic seems awkward - rude, even - as if I don't know them enough to be commenting on their life. Yet they have graciously done the same for me.

Any suggestions on fixing this problem?

EDIT: I am reminded of the mentality of parkour when I think about this. I just need to blast through it with the most efficiency and least pain, but I'm not sure how to go about it.

[Evicious]

Valid point about not knowing someone well enough to comment on their life - to a degree. Think of it like when a stranger strikes up a conversation with you, say, in line at that coffee shop: all you have to talk about it what they're talking about. So if someone is blogging about how awesome their workout went, a polite "Great to hear!" is perfectly appropriate; conversely, if things didn't go quite the way they planned, "Hang in there, dude, you got this," is just as acceptable. Try just leaving those kinds of little comments at first, and as time goes on, I think you'll find yourself becoming more conversational with the people who have been helping you.

[Morrigainz]

Valid point about not knowing someone well enough to comment on their life - to a degree. Think of it like when a stranger strikes up a conversation with you, say, in line at that coffee shop: all you have to talk about it what they're talking about. So if someone is blogging about how awesome their workout went, a polite "Great to hear!" is perfectly appropriate; conversely, if things didn't go quite the way they planned, "Hang in there, dude, you got this," is just as acceptable. Try just leaving those kinds of little comments at first, and as time goes on, I think you'll find yourself becoming more conversational with the people who have been helping you.

This.

Also don't be afraid! Nerds unite!

[fyretooth]

Excellent, excellent point, Evicious. I'll get right on that.

Indeed, MirGSS! This place is awesome, because everybody is at least a little bit like-minded.

[Abbey]

I find it easier to comment on posts where I have something in common with the OP.. for instance, finding it awkward to post on other topics because you feel you don't know them xD. I find, in general, people like having people comment on their progress/general topics, no matter who it is. Hey, they joined a community, that's what they're there for ^^.

[bigm141414]

Step 1) Go to my challenge thread.

Step 2) Post funny picture

Step 3) ???

Step 4) Profit!

Funny pictures are always welcome. No need to by shy, you can only get to know community members through interactions with them. We're not all that intimidating.

[Ryan Sannar]

I'm giving you permission to post on my thread.

[faerywethyr]

I totally feel the same way all the time! I am a serious lurker here on Nerd Fitness but I struggle to post, sigh I would think I could leave my introvertedness behind on the interwebs.

[Horsedog]

I find it easier to comment on posts where I have something in common with the OP.. for instance, finding it awkward to post on other topics because you feel you don't know them xD. I find, in general, people like having people comment on their progress/general topics, no matter who it is. Hey, they joined a community, that's what they're there for ^^.

I definitely agree with this. I joined because I liked the vibe I got from Steve's blog, and this community has only re-inforced (like, 100 times over) that feeling! Maybe not everyone who posts here is looking to get feedback and whatnot, but I think most are...like Abby says, that's what a community is

Emerge from the gloom, assassin!

[Morrigainz]

Post ALL the things!

[Horsedog]

Post ALL the things!

BAHAHA!

[Blueberries]

Step 1) Go to my challenge thread.

Step 2) Post funny picture

Step 3) ???

Step 4) Profit!

Funny pictures are always welcome. No need to by shy, you can only get to know community members through interactions with them. We're not all that intimidating.

I believe the gauntlet has been thrown down.

[Morrigainz]

Yeah and BigM is serious with his gauntlets.....

[fire.eagle]

Post ALL the things!

Yep, that's basically what I was going to say. I tend to lurk more, but random comments can still contribute to the conversation and it sets you up to post more. This is even more so in the challenge threads. Reading over someone's thread and posting a "Hey, great job!" might look pretty pointless when you type it, but the person on the other end gets to see the encouragement then also know that there are people actually reading their log who care enough to post, which lends some accountability to it as well. (I mean, you can't disappoint the random strangers on the internet, right?)

I get what you mean by saying it feels rude; I'm a massive introvert and will tend to avoid any chance of annoying someone. But, look at it this way: you're on a public forum. If people didn't want interaction, they wouldn't be here. Or, at least, I haven't met any jerks here. They'll at least nicely tell you to GTFO their thread.

^Perfect example of me rambling for a post to be active in a thread.

[Mad Rocker]

I find it difficult to post loads too, as I'm not in a position where I can really offer advice since many people here are far more knowledgeable/experienced, but at the same time I don't have too many questions to ask either.

This doesn't really apply to challenge threads though. Encouragement is easy enough.

[Skwuats911]

I find it difficult to post loads too, as I'm not in a position where I can really offer advice since many people here are far more knowledgeable/experienced, but at the same time I don't have too many questions to ask either.

This! But hopefully that starts to change since I've made it a goal to just try and be more social and not stuck in my introvert ways.

[fyretooth]

Wow! I certainly drew many people onto the discussion. How exciting!

Thanks all, for your great input. Someday soon, you might see me sneaking into one of your threads! Who knows?

[Raincloak]

Don't think too highly of overposting. Your time is better spent on other things, really.

[fire.eagle]

Sure, but if you're lurking anyways, may as well post while you're here.

[zendup]

Don't worry about it! People wouldn't post in forums if they didn't want other people to respond.

My current issue is that I seem to be a "thread killer". There are a lot of threads that seem to never see the light of day again after I leave a comment. I'm sorry if I kill this one. lol

[surana16]

Gah I'm terrible at lurking on forums too! Definitely gonna start leaving just comments here and there, glad I'm not the only one

[---]

Don't worry about it! People wouldn't post in forums if they didn't want other people to respond.

My current issue is that I seem to be a "thread killer". There are a lot of threads that seem to never see the light of day again after I leave a comment. I'm sorry if I kill this one. lol

Welp, Zendup's posted. Guess that means it's time for me to leave this thread.

To be serious, though, there's a lot of good comments that people have left so far. I want to especially reiterate fire.eagle's point. When I see people leave a comment on my topic, even if it's just a quick "good to hear!", I find it delightful. Now, don't do what I did in another forum and feel obligated to read every single thread, because then that's just jumping off into the other pitfall and will suck away all your free time--especially in a forum this large.

There's my input. *drops 2 cents into the jar*

[Mad Rocker]

Now, don't do what I did in another forum and feel obligated to read every single thread, because then that's just jumping off into the other pitfall and will suck away all your free time--especially in a forum this large.

Times like these that you feel sorry for the mods, eh? I mod a guitar forum and manage to skim most of the posts there every day, but there are far fewer active members than there are here.

[---]

No kidding...

[Piccolojones]

I get what you mean by saying it feels rude; I'm a massive introvert and will tend to avoid any chance of annoying someone. But, look at it this way: you're on a public forum. If people didn't want interaction, they wouldn't be here. Or, at least, I haven't met any jerks here. They'll at least nicely tell you to GTFO their thread.

^^^ This. The way I look at it is that people are looking for some sort feedback, affirmation, correction, or other response. I'd venture a guess that many of us are lacking this sort of interaction with our friends IRL (my nerd friends aren't too much help with fitness talk), which is why we talk about it here.

And since I, too, understand the awkwardness of speaking into another's life, I try to end my posts/blogs with some sort of question or call to action. Not only am I able to learn or challenge others, but the awkwardness level drops if I'm asking for responses, right?