As much as I hate to ask...

[Ghost]

Here's the intel I have right now.

I've got a girl coming over right. First girlfriend ever. (Quite sad, I know, but I'm only 16)

It's Wednesday that she is coming over. Only problem is, I have no clue what to do with her.

We've never kissed, but we have been together for about three months. (Again, sad)

Obviously, being 16 that rules out sex. So no saying sex.

Any tips on what we could do? (Be nice)

UPDATE: Mission successful! Thanks so much for all the support.

Let's say it went well, for a newbie anyway

[shortstuff]

What does she enjoy doing? Does she play video games? Does she watch movies? What movies does she like? Does she like bored games? Does she like being/doing something outside?

Think of thinks you have done together that you both enjoy and can do at your place.

[Ghost]

Well, we don't have much in common, which is a bad omen in itself.

I think if I play my cards right, I could make movies and games fun.

Although she doesn't give much away, so I'm still trying to decipher fun things.

[Morrigainz]

All of these are good suggestions.

Also having a gf at 16 is not sad

I know it is winter there, but is it too horrible out to take a walk? Sometimes walks are nice. Or like shortstuff said..video games, movies, board/card games, that kind of stuff.

Let us know how it goes, eh? And have fun!

[Jcannon98188]

sex.

jk

[Librarian of Doom]

First of all, having your first girlfriend at 16 is not sad. I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 20. Ended up marrying him, too (Nine years later, still going strong!)

Secondly, I know it's difficult, especially when you really like someone, but I recommend something like the following.

When she gets there, say something along the lines of this:

"I really like you, and I want you to have fun while you're here. I thought we could do x, but if there's something else you'd rather do, please let me know."

[Jcannon98188]

In all seriousness though, there is nothing wrong with being 16 and only having one girlfriend. I myself am 20, and have only ever had 1 girlfriend before. Movies and games can be a fun thing to do, especially since it gives her an opportunity to be around you when you are having fun, and not just trying to impress her. If you are feeling adventurous, you can even *le gasp* hold hands or something while you are watching the movie. Just have fun doing it, and let everything progress organically.

Oh, and that one girl I dated? We were dating for 1.5 years before we ever kissed. Some people just take things slow, it really isn't sad at all. Don't rush things, let it just... happen.

[Guest Snake McClain]

Okay first off it is NOT a problem not having much in common. as long as you enjoy relaxing the same way. LEt me explain. I love canoeing. but say my girlfriend doesn't. She likes reading on her own. So i can go canoe and she can read. everyone is happy. NOW we relax the same way though. We enjoy sitting across a table from eachother just chatting and having lots of eye contact. we enjoy different things and that is good. but i gaurantee you have SOME thing in common to do together. somewhere on the list.

I suggest watch a movie. Or go for a walk together. Be sure to ask open ended questions (not yes or no questions but maybe something like, "what is your favorite child hood memory? and why?)

[Centurion]

Movie's are always good as something to do but at the same time they aren't exactly a good way to get to know someone. You could always just put some music on and talk. As far as not having a lot in common just think that it gives you more to talk about as all the kind of things you like she won't know much about and vice versa. And for what it's worth I think I had my first real girlfriend at 16. I had one before that I'd say was more a girlfriend in name alone, didn't ever really spend much time together or do anything together, it was more just notes passed across the classroom but I guess that's what relationships are when you're that young

[Doodle]

My first real boyfriend I got right before my 16th birthday we stayed together for 8 years. It'll be fun don't worry and as a girl I agree with what *scratches head* someone said.. just being honest. "I really like you... what do you want to do? What do you like to do?" can even make that part of your conversation Before she comes over.. thru notes and things. Good luck and enjoy it

[CyningaDena]

I'm a big proponent of finding the dorkiest thing possible to do together. It's silly fun that lightens the mood, and it shows that you're comfortable enough with the other person to laugh at yourself. And then when you pull out the big guns for a romantic evening, it's mind-blowing in comparison. Do y'all have those velvet posters of unicorns and dolphins that you color with markers? Perfect third date. Take sidewalk chalk to a parking lot and try to make a mural. Take some old beat-up fishing poles to a place where there are no fish, like a park fountain. (You don't have to clean the fish that way!)

Doing something together (as opposed to just watching something like movies or just listening to something like concerts) helps me feel a lot more comfortable. It keeps you busy, gives you something to focus on when conversation ebbs, but still lets you talk with each other.

Go get 'em, tiger!

[katpower]

Didn't touch a boy until I was 20... still with that boy 12 years later... Dude, you're a stud!

Just take it easy, have a nice fun night and don't worry about what you "should" be doing.

[rtalencar]

Instead of worrying just about what she'll like doing, what do YOU like to do? Put together a list of things you enjoy that could be done with another person. Now take that list and pare it down to stuff you think she might enjoy.

It's much easier for both folks to have a good time if they both like the activity. It's one thing to do something she enjoys that you dislike if she's TOLD you...but if she hasn't don't guess at crap you hate.

[ICB]

I'm a big fan of walks, as long as it's a nice day outside. You end up talking to each other more than if you were watching a movie.

[dracopervicax]

Well, I know that when I was 16 (also no-sex), a lot of the time me and my SO would just spend hours and hours talking. You don't necessarily have to do anything. Long walks, etc., basically anything that enabled us to have great conversations.

[Sambalina]

From a girl who used to be 16's pov: I always enjoyed *doing* things - going for a bush walk, going to the beach (not nec. to swim, but walk, draw in the sand, find shells, etc). One thing that could work is cooking or baking. Even just do one of those SaraLee out of the box just mix eggs and water things. Especially if it's something you can decorate after it's done - food and art! I think concentrating on the recipe could take some of the pressure off, you guys can have some old-fashioned clean fun, and then you've got a tasty treat to enjoy together too.

And, if she's agreed to come over to your house, never fear - she 100% wants you to hold her hand

[realbrickwall]

Do something neither of you have done before. Buy a book of brain teasers and try to figure them out together. Find something awful on TV and just make jokes about it the entire time. Cook two foods together that you really don't think are supposed to go together.

Life is an adventure. If you're looking for someone to go through it with, look for someone you like going on adventures with.

If you're looking for someone to make out with, then you can go "traditional", I guess.

[smedly]

Since it's winter it's cuddle season! But do what is comfortable for both of you.

[ponita]

And, if she's agreed to come over to your house, never fear - she 100% wants you to hold her hand

I totally agree with this! Also want to vote for 'do something' (walks, games, etc) rather than watching a movie, which can have lots of awkward moments. I didn't start dating until I was 16 either but the best date I had is when the guy made dinner for me. It was just a simple pasta dish but I was impressed by the fact that he took the time to prepare and do something nice for me.

Hope it all goes well for you!

[Inksplat]

I'd strongly recommend something that requires some degree of physical contact/closeness. If you want to kiss her, you should definitely start there.

If you can teach her to do something, that's usually a good method. It can allow you to be close to demonstrate something, to guide her hands, or her arms, or anything else involved.

Also, confidence. If you're nervous, that's the end of that, unless she has already decided to make out with you ahead of time. And even then, you could blow it.

[Ghost]

As much as I radiate confidence normally, it's all left me now

I'm pretty sure this will be the one for the kiss.

If I am reading her body language and speech right, then she seems to want one.

Still gotta be sure though.

I'm so much better at commanding armies and saving the world then I am at relationships.

[Inksplat]

As much as I radiate confidence normally, it's all left me now

I'm pretty sure this will be the one for the kiss.

If I am reading her body language and speech right, then she seems to want one.

Still gotta be sure though.

I'm so much better at commanding armies and saving the world then I am at relationships.

If you think she wants one, then go for it. You don't need to "Be sure". You just have to give her a chance to disengage. Just get closer in steps, increase physical contact, and pay attention. If she lets you get within a few inches, you're probably good.

Or, you could just ask. If you've got a decent (or funny) delivery, asking for a kiss isn't going to make her suddenly say no when she would have said yes.

[inara]

I'm also a big fan of doing this together, particularly things that involve "accidental" touching like say ice-skating or playing silly games. Then you don't have to think about when and how to touch her and it all becomes more natural, plus it reduces the amount of awkward conversation fillers. And yes I do realize ice-skating is a crappy example since you live in Australia but you get my drift.

But honestly if you've been together for several months already and she's coming over to see you, you really have nothing to worry about! And you don't have to ask permission, be bold, you have nothing to lose!

[thatgirljj]

Could you guys cook something together? You may not always like the same movies or games, and the weather isn't always great for a walk, but just assembling a pizza or making/decorating cookies or something is always a nice low-key activity.

-jj

[azsf]

seconding (thirding, fourthing?) cooking together. aim for something you can both help make, like a cake or a big pasta dish. make your own pasta, a man who can make his own gnocchi is not a lonely man.

after dinner settle down on the couch for a 'movie', but use this time to advance on the all fun you've been having cooking and eating (and potentially cleaning) together. get close, hold hands, cuddle a bit, make out etc.