MEN ONLY THREAD part two

[Shortgorilla]

That likeness is really cool.

 

I have a question, guys. How do you battle the feeling of being short?

 

I am a short guy. 5'6" last time I measured. Now that I have a healthier body, my confidence seems to cling to the fact that I can't change my height.

 

I am fairly confidence, but the discussions about the guys from girls always make me cringe. They always notice the height first, and they seem to be unattracted to shorter dudes. I know confidence is attractive, but it's hard when you fail the first box in a checklist like height.

 

What do you guys think?

 

I'm also 5'6".  I also tell myself every day, whether it's true or not, that I'm a badass.  I make sure that when I walk in I own the room.  If I have a meeting to go to, I look around the room like "If this was prison, you bet your ass I'd get top bunk."  I've always been terrible with women, but once I decided to disregard them they became attracted to me.  I don't know why, but they are.  Some of them anyways.

[Endor]

Interesting article on this subject written by a tall woman who dates shorter men. 

 

http://www.esquire.com/women/sex/date-a-taller-woman

[Zorch]

Interesting article on this subject written by a tall woman who dates shorter men. 

 

http://www.esquire.com/women/sex/date-a-taller-woman

I think the author of this article is on the right track.  It probably isn't exclusively about height, but more about perceived "strength" or "alpha-ness".  This includes both the physical(height, athleticism, general good looks), and the mental(intelligence, confidence, etc.).  While there are exceptions, women generally want a guy who can convey "strength" - and while height tends to be a component of this, it also includes being in shape, and having a personality that conveys this in the form of confidence/willingness to take charge.  A guy who is of average height, but in good physical condition and displays confidence is going to be more attractive to the vast majority of women than someone who is taller, but out-of-shape and less confident.  In general I feel that women(with exceptions) are far less interested in a guy who may be perceived to be "weaker" than them - though as I stated there is more to this than the physical realm - it encompasses personality and the intellectual realm as well.

 

 

From the perspective of a guy who's VERY tall(6'6"), height is an advantage, but not as valuable as force of personality in most cases.  The biggest advantage to height is in getting to "hello" - being exceptionally tall often gets you noticed as soon as you walk into the room - an advantage that shorter guys don't have.  However while it's an advantage at step 1, it alone is not sufficient.  While height almost certainly gave me an advantage with respect to meeting my girlfriend, keeping up with(and not being intimidated by) her intellect was a requirement - as was being reasonably active and in-shape.  I think for many women, height is not a true "must" but more of a "nice to have"/"plus" quality.  Given the opportunity many women may look for taller men over shorter ones, but I think most can be given a sufficiently compelling argument to reconsider from the right individual.

[Phytomancer]

Wonderful article, Endor, and awesome analysis, Zorch.

 

I agree. Strength and presence are the important part for women to notice a man. A shorter man has to do much more to keep up, which can be tiring. We have to be in shape, groom better, be more assessing (which can become creepy when overdose.) 

 

The only time when I ever felt attractive was when I went to coordinate a project in India. The girls showed their affection toward me very openly and displayed disappointment when they knew I had a gf. Then I came back to the reality in the US, and got ignored once again (I actually found it comforting.)

 

Being single again, I have to get back to the dating pool, and put on a confident front when you don't know what you're doing can be exhausting.

 

I have a 6'5" friend. I know tall people problem is not only a consolation thing people mutter when their friends complain about being short. I am always comfortable in flights, desk chairs, and long car rides. Even in physical games, shorter limbs and a more compact body can be an advantage given certain strategies. However, the attention from girls part is still sticking in my crawl.

 

I guess I will have to love what I can't change. I guess it builds characters.

[matty_mcfly]

My issue with my height is two fold. Neither being female related.

My first issue is that I was always the tall kid (last row in class pictures) and the doctors I saw when I was having knee issues blew smoke up my ass and said I'll probably be 6'+...lol I'm 5'8 (though my license says 5'9). So I was bothered having to get used to being the shorter guy.

Second issue (and this is likely me over thinking but) is work related. I work in insurance sales, which happens to be dominated by older white men (people) both other agents and our insureds. So being shorter than most everybody and 20-30 years younger than everyone makes it a bit of a headache on first impressions.

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[Frost of the Gloaming]

I would love to do some sort of social expirement that dealt with height impressions, because anytime people call about procedures or items they will refer everyone to me, however when we are out in the "field" people will automatically go to my co-worker who is 6'6 who will still ask me or have them ask me

 

Basically it's a warrior vs assassin type of body thing going on.

[Frost of the Gloaming]

clarification; both me and my co-worker have been here for the same amount of time and we are both known through out the entire agency, when new people are sent up here to retreive something they will be told to either look for the really tall guy or the guy with the beard.

[Phytomancer]

Ah, I am referred to as the buff Asian dude, which clarifies things for most new people. But yes, people always go for the tallest guys for advice in my line of work too.  

[Thrillho]

I'm 6'4", thick body, broad shoulders, and I am so far from an alpha presence people often forget I'm standing there. 

[Barmacral]

I guess I will have to love what I can't change. I guess it builds characters.

 

[eXistenZorcise]

I'm 5'11. It makes me distinctly average (certainly in the UK). Everything about me is average: weight, height, shoe size, dangly bit size. I love it, I don't care.

[matty_mcfly]

Lol dangly bit size?

[Frost of the Gloaming]

want to know what the best thing about being a smaller than avg guy with an avg size dangly bit, it doesn't look avg. ha

[eXistenZorcise]

Lol dangly bit size?

Yep. Dangly bit. Does exactly what it says on the tin!

 

want to know what the best thing about being a smaller than avg guy with an avg size dangly bit, it doesn't look avg. ha

That is so true. But also, for an average sized guy, it means everything looks in perfect equilibrium. At least that's what I tell myself.

[matty_mcfly]

want to know what the best thing about being a smaller than avg guy with an avg size dangly bit, it doesn't look avg. ha

Haha is that the same thought process as dating a girl with small hands?

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[Frost of the Gloaming]

exact,

 

never date a girl with big hands!!!!

[matty_mcfly]

exact,

never date a girl with big hands!!!!

Lmao ah the magic of optical illusions

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[Thrillho]

What if she was born that way? That chick is metal

[Phytomancer]

I have my doubts for girls with big hand out of instinct. You see, I was born in the land where the males can look like these if so they choose.

 

 

A guy's gotta be a little careful. 

[Frost of the Gloaming]

look for the Adam's apple

[Phytomancer]

Believe me, some ladyboy's adam's apples can be very subtle-- especially if they takes hormones pre-puberty. 

[Frost of the Gloaming]

just curious but is bisexuality more accepted over there? or is it considered something different if you do fall in love with a ladyboy?

[Phytomancer]

In the culture, People are accepting to the way others express themselves. Woman can dress like a man, and a man can dress like a woman. When it comes to love, however, it's a bit complicated.

 

I spent most of my late teen life in the US, hence I don't understand much of the underlining thoughts of it.

 

It seems that the lady boys like men, but men tend to consider themselves embarrassing being pursued by lady boys or pursuing lady boys. There are men who are interested in lady boys and treat them like women as well, but they are less common. 

 

I was called sexist once by a lady boy because I rejected his romantic pursue because of his gender. (Uh, you're a sweet friend, but also a dude.) I still can't counter him on that.   

[Frost of the Gloaming]

so basically dating/love is complicated worldwide

[161803398874989]

so basically dating/love is complicated worldwide

Who would've though it!