Different ways of venting.

[Ghost]

Say you've just had to put up with a terrible colleague all day.

You are incredibly angry, he might have gone through your things too.

It is probably illegal to draw your sword and impale him, so what do you do?

I would hit things, hard.

But that breaks said things.

What tactics do you use to deal with anger and stress NF?

[realbrickwall]

The best methods of venting I've found are multiple windows per room, well-maintained duct systems, and...

Wait, that's not what you wanted?

Well, believe me, if I knew a good method, I wouldn't be suffering so much right now.

[rx'drobot]

Truthfully, there are generally a few things that calm me down and put me back on track.

- Pushing myself overly hard at the gym

- A long ride on my motorcycle

- Taking a step back and saying "Its not worth being angry over something so stupid"

Sometimes however it does take finding someone secluded and just yelling at the top of my lungs, but since starting working out 4 days a week, I've noticed a decrease in anger and stress, despite the fact that I have more work then I can complete at my job.

[shagy2303]

im lost just as you but it is stress not just anger//

[UberMoM]

I usually cry in the shower. It always makes me feel better, and I don't have to worry about people asking me why I am upset. I also have very long imaginary conversations where I get to tell the person what for.

[Frost of the Gloaming]

I get lost in my head, and start working on different beats and what not, much to the dismay of every one in ear shot around my desk, well if you people stopped being idiots and did what you were told in the first place you wouldn't be having this problem

[SpazzyMal]

I try, mostly, to just remember that in the end there's nothing to get upset over most of the time. By remaining calm, you can continue to just be happy. Try not to waste time on small stuff. Nothing is going to change by you being angry aside from your stress levels will rise, and you'll be consumed by bad feelings for possibly hours over something that's already over and done with. If needed, talk to the person who upset you, tell them why not to do something that has bothered you, and then try to move on. It takes time and practice, but if done (and it can be done) you'll be a much happier person all the time afterward.

[rtalencar]

My dojo has these and I punch them until my knuckles bleed. We also have a wing chun dummy that's fun to bang on. If you are ok with having scarred up hands (I kind of like it, personally) it can work quite well.

I also have a few friends that I like to practice grappling with (our school does some judo and jiujitsu in addition to karate). Get yourself choked out 2 or 15 times and it's hard to stay angry.

Lifting weights is also a good channel for frustration (not as good for me as hitting things and starving my brain of oxygen, but much healthier).

If I'm unable to get to the gym or my dojo though...I usually shoot things on my PC (good) or eat junk food (bad).

Find what works for you. That makiwara I linked you could make for like $10 with a post, some concrete, and some rope. If you like hitting things but they break, hit things that don't break.

[Ulsted]

List of things an Ulsted does to vent/de-stress:

1. Hit all the things. Specifically the punching bags or my sparring partner.

2. Call all the friends and drink all the beers. Well, not all the beers. I do like talking to my buddies, even if it is about nothing in particular.

3. Talk to my wife about all the things.

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[Haikoo]

EXERCISE! That one helps me ton. I take it to the gym or the floor or sidewalk. Whatever. I always feel better after i get that heartrate, muscles and endorphins going.

Sometimes I write it down (blog, journal, whatever)

Sometimes I find some NF friends in chat and vent a moment to them (that often involves a few f bombs lol)

Then I take some deep breaths and move on.

[Brndy]

Tried and true favorites:

• Go for a walk or run.
  
• Call up a friend on the phone and bitch about it for a good long while.
  
• Write in my journal.
  
• If I'm reading a good novel I'll go escape into that world for a bit.
  
• Take a step back, think about all the suffering that exists in the world, and remind myself that I have it really good.
  
• Tell myself to stop wasting time and mental energy being angry. There are so many good things to be spending my energy on!
  

And if the problem is with another person, I remind myself that everyone else has their own stories, their own lives, their own problems, and I have no way of understanding what sorts of things they are dealing with. Someone cut me off in traffic? Maybe they're rushing to see someone sick in the hospital. Someone is being snappy and difficult with me? Maybe they just got a piece of bad news that has them upset. There's a Dominican saying, "Sólo la cuchara conoce el corazón del auyama" ("Only the knife understands the heart of the squash."). Can't tell what's going on inside someone else from the outside, so withhold judgement until you have a knife.

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

1 Write down all the things you want to say to the offensive person, then set the paper on fire.

2 Find things you are allowed to break, then break them.

3 Break them again.

4 Work out really hard

5 Figure out what, if anything, in you needs to change so that person doesn't bother you so much (definetly the least fun, but by far the most productive.

6 Find the things from 3 and break them some more.

[Lachy]

I sit next to an annoying co-worker. Loudest man ever! When I get mad stressed, I go for a walk around the car park, clear my head. I feel good as I come back in but then the rage starts again.

I had an awesome idea years ago, but never implimented it, I'm sure everyone with the urge to break stuff will like it.

Go buy a lego kit, something of a decent size, I always wanted a smallish Death Star (because round things are great for throwing). Build said kit and keep it handy. When the rage hits, you throw the lego item at the wall/floor/celing/annoying person.

Great satisfaction of breaking something.

But it's meant to come apart, it's not actually broken.

And then you get that nerdy satisfaction of rebuilding it after you calm down, who doesn't love building lego?!

[7callmemom]

I run until it either stops hurting or till I'm too tired to care anymore.

An imperfect method maybe, but it works better than brownies ever did.

[Victoriaoke]

get a punching bag. I, too, feel like I need to punch things sometimes. The best way to deal with this feeling? Punching things. Preferably, squishy things that won't hurt your hands/wrists. Right now I use one of those inflatable exercise balls... not it's intended purpose, but it was cheap ($10), there is just enough resistance and "bounce back" to make it satisfying, and it works while I don't have access to an actual punching bag (I prop it in the corner so it doesn't "run away" from me).

I like throwing things, too. A tennis ball and an outside wall do very nicely, if you need a portable outlet.

Sometimes even just putting your palms against a wall and pressing as hard as you can helps get rid of that type of energy (if you need to get rid of some of it while you are still at work).

Just don't take it out on yourself or the person you're upset with, and don't stew in it (because that will only make you miserable).

[cob]

Practice killing the offender with your mind. Sam Axe tried it!

[BarefootViking]

Yeah...  I know...  Ressurecting a old thread.  Had to though because venting is something I would love to have a productive way of doing. 

 

Problem is breaking things means I have to clean up, fix and replace stuff and wins me no points with the family.

 

Calmly discussing my issues with the people that make me want to explode only leaves me aggravated and more frustrated.

 

Meditation and contemplation only give me time to ponder how much people are pissing me off.

 

This leaves me with faking a happy attitude around them all the while I have a voice going off in my head that sounds a lot like Sam Kinison.

 

SIGH...

[EmCee]

It depends on my level of frustration. I ALWAYS feel better when I lift ALL the things. Or run all the miles (this is rare but sometimes I get frustrated on non-lifting days and this is my only option).

I also like to put happy music on and sing at the top of my lungs and dance around.

If those don't work, I cry and occasionally scream into a pillow.

[RisenPhoenix]

When stressed or frustrated (or preparing to endure an even that is stressful or frustrating.... like family reunions), I either will hit up the dojo (if I can) and go as "hard" as I can (which is tricksy, because I'm not supposed to use muscle there) or I zone out with a zillion cups of tea and a book in silence/very low relaxing music.

[BadWolf]

I have become a master of this over the last couple months. I even have a paper with de-stressing techniques next to my desk that I drew. Violent video games, going for a walk at lunch time, or working out are great for letting it out. Sometimes I swear loudly in my bedroom as well.

 

I also massage my ears to make myself feel better afterward. Weird, but effective.

[I-Jo]

woooosaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[ceethegreat]

Yeah...  I know...  Ressurecting a old thread.  Had to though because venting is something I would love to have a productive way of doing. 

 

Problem is breaking things means I have to clean up, fix and replace stuff and wins me no points with the family.

 

Calmly discussing my issues with the people that make me want to explode only leaves me aggravated and more frustrated.

 

Meditation and contemplation only give me time to ponder how much people are pissing me off.

 

This leaves me with faking a happy attitude around them all the while I have a voice going off in my head that sounds a lot like Sam Kinison.

 

SIGH...

 

This made me laugh because I don't like cleaning so I don't want to break anything lol. I fake the good attitude a lot hoping I can fake it til I make it. 

 

I find *not* calmly venting to certain friends who I know won't try to solve my problems (unless I ask) is very helpful. I try to warn them by saying I need to vent/yell/say very not nice things because I need to let it out. Or I journal journal journal... all the nasty things I want to say/do but not actually be caught saying/doing in public.  I just have to be careful to not, like, ruminate over it or I make myself worse. Fine line to walk.

 

I've recently come to the conclusion that I need to channel the aggression in a controlled/trained physical way. Just trying to figure out what that best way is now. 

[cracked_belle]

I write the issues, people, or things bothering me on a sheet of paper -- then I burn the paper.  seriously, I go outside and burn the paper, often times laughing maniacally in the process.